It's All Relative (16 page)

Kai prepared a couple of cans of soup; he was still smiling over her box of goodies. While he was busy, Jessie put his new things away. He glanced over at her when he noticed what she was doing, but he didn’t say anything, didn’t ask her to stop. She finished putting everything away in the spaces she had envisioned for them just as dinner was done. As she was smiling to herself at how much homier his place seemed, and how perfectly suited to him the decor was, Kai approached her with a bowl of soup in each hand, and a plate of grilled cheese sandwiches balanced on his arm.

He motioned to the bed she’d straightened for him. Slightly blushing at the intimate memory she still recalled whenever she looked at the damn thing, Jessie sat down and rested her back against his new headboard. He sat next to her, handed her a bowl, and placed the plate of sandwiches between them. Grabbing a sandwich, Jessie gave him a crooked grin. “We should really find you a table.”

Kai returned her smile as he grabbed a sandwich. “I like eating in bed.”

She grinned at the comment and felt her cheeks heating again. Kai cleared his throat, like he was trying to clear the sudden tension, and then they began eating their meal. They sat in a comfortable silence for a while, then Kai turned on the TV. He found a sitcom for them to watch, one where the family’s problems seemed even more complex than their own. They couldn’t help but laugh at the absurdity.

After the light meal, Jessie snapped up Kai’s dishes and washed them for him. It was the least she could do, since he’d made dinner. Kai protested at first, but the longer he sat in the bed, the more tired he appeared to get. After thanking her, he settled back into his pillows and closed his eyes. Jessie peeked at him while she cleaned up, wondering if he was falling asleep.

Once everything was washed and put away, she walked back over to him and started taking off his shoes. He cracked his eyes open and grinned at her. “You’re too good to me,” he whispered.

She smiled as she took off his other shoe. “No, I’m just anal. You shouldn’t have shoes on the bed.” He laughed at her comment and sat up. Ignoring the memory of her wearing heels in his bed while they’d done…stuff, Jessie sat next to him again.

Kai looked over at her, then let out a tired sigh and rested his head on her shoulder. Feeling like he was suffering from exhaustion, Jessie scooted down the headboard to rest her head against his pillows, bringing him with her. He twisted into her body, and she brought her arm around him, so he was nestled in the hollow of her shoulder.

Sighing contentedly, he moved his hand to rest it on her stomach. “Is this okay?” he whispered.

She nodded and pressed her lips into his hair. “Yeah.” Jessie wasn’t sure if it was technically okay or not, but it felt so warm and safe, she didn’t care.

He sighed again. “Good, you feel nice.”

He’d barely murmured the words, and Jessie pulled back to examine his drawn face. Running her fingers through his hair, she asked, “Are you all right?”

Opening his eyes to look at her, Kai let out a weary exhale. “I don’t know if it’s because of all the stings, or because I got up so early today, but I feel wiped, and a little sick.” He frowned, obviously not wanting to be ill.

Jessie frowned too as concern filled her. “Well, you could be suffering from a little altitude sickness? You’re used to living much closer to sea level. I’m sure you’ll feel better in a couple of days.”

Nodding, he closed his eyes again. Jessie gently squeezed him as she listened to his even breath. Just when she was sure he was sound asleep, he whispered, “Thank you, Jessie, for everything.” His voice came out thick with exhaustion.

Smiling, Jessie rested her cheek against his head. “It’s not a problem, Kai. We’re family, that’s what family does.” Her admission made her frown. Maybe how they were resting wasn’t appropriate. Maybe she should leave.

Kai’s hand on her stomach shifted to her hip. He gently squeezed, holding her to him, almost like he knew she was considering leaving. Jessie heard him mumble thank you again, and she pressed her lips to his hair again as a tender ache tore her heart apart. Closing her eyes, Jessie cursed her lack of willpower. Hadn’t she vowed earlier to keep some space between them? Since he was tightly cuddled into her side, it was evident that neither one of them could maintain distance for long. Jessie wasn’t sure what that meant for their future.

Eventually, his grip loosened, and his breathing slowed. Pulling back, Jessie peered down at him. “Kai?” She moved farther away when he didn’t respond. “Kai, are you asleep?”

Watching his face, Jessie waited for him to answer her. He didn’t. Carefully sliding her arm out from under him, she settled him on his pillows and adjusted the covers around him, so he wouldn’t get chilly as he slept. After tucking a stray foot under the blankets, she stared down at him. His face was completely relaxed, his full lips slightly parted as he took long, low breaths.

Even asleep, she could see the exhaustion in his face, the circles under his eyes. He’d adjusted to a lot of changes coming here, and it was wearing him down. Furrowing her brow, Jessie hoped she wasn’t one of the troubling things he was acclimating to. At least the physical changes would get easier on him. His body was just going to punish him for it first. Thinking about his multiple bee stings made her smile again. Poor guy. Not the greatest thing to have happen on his first day.

Her heart swelled with warmth as she looked down on him. Slowly leaning over, she placed her lips to his forehead. Kai exhaled and muttered something that sounded like her name. Jessie pulled back and peered down at him intently. His eyes were still closed, his face still peaceful in slumber.

Smiling, she ran the back of her finger down his cheek. “Goodnight, Kai,” she whispered.

His lips twitched, like he was smiling in a dream. Jessie wondered if he was thinking about her, then hated herself for wanting him to be thinking of her. He shouldn’t be as tortured as she was. Well, she shouldn’t
want
him to be as tortured as she was, at any rate. What he felt for her, besides gratitude and maybe some residual attraction, Jessie wasn’t sure. But she was beginning to understand what she felt for him more and more with every second they spent together, and it terrified her.

Leaning down close to his face, she whispered in a shaking voice, “I think I’m falling for you.”

Her heart hammering in her chest, she lightly pressed her lips to his. She pulled them away instantly, but not before she felt him minutely respond, his lips softly moving against hers. But she must have been imagining that. He was asleep. He probably wouldn’t kiss her back right now, not with how tired he’d been.

Putting her fingers to her suddenly hot lips, she swallowed the painful lump in her throat. He shouldn’t ever kiss her back, just like she shouldn’t ever kiss him. Cursing all the feelings that she couldn’t seem to shut off, Jessie stood and grabbed her things. Then, shutting off the lights, she closed his door and left him alone in his slumber.

K
ai woke up the next morning from a disturbing, but pleasant, dream. Pleasant, because he’d been dreaming about Jessie. Disturbing, because he’d been dreaming about doing very inappropriate things with her. In his dream, she’d told him that she was falling for him, and then she’d tenderly kissed him. As he lay awake in his bed, his eyes straining to make out any coherent shape in his dark room, he still felt the thrill those words had given him.

He wearily ran a hand down his face. What he wouldn’t give to hear her actually say those words to him. But no. That was a really horrible thing for him to want. Jessie shouldn’t be dragged down into his confusion. It would be best for her to find a way past the attraction that he could sometimes feel from her, and only see him as family.

He was struggling with doing the same.

Kai had been isolated from his extended family for so long, that the only person who actually felt like family to him was his grandmother. Everyone else, all of the miscellaneous cousins, uncles and aunts, were nothing more to him than a long list of names on the annual family letter that Gran put together every year, but DNA didn’t lie, and Jessie and Kai couldn’t share that kind of future.

Sighing, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. Grabbing his cell phone off the nightstand beside his bed, he glanced at the time. He’d given into sleep much too soon, and now he’d woken up well before work. He would probably be exhausted by the end of the night again. Oh well. At least his body was shifting in the right direction, and Kai was sure that, given another couple of days, a week at the most, he would be in line with the people here.

Yawning, Kai noticed he’d missed a call from his mom. She was probably curious how his first day had gone. It was too early in her time zone to call her back. He would just have to call her after work. As he rubbed the sore, healing spots on his back, he wondered what he’d tell her. He didn’t have very many positive things about his first day that he could share. The strange Louis, the horny Missy, the damn bees, and his oddly distant boss.

Frowning as his thoughts turned to Mason Thomas, Kai got out of bed. For someone who was connected with his parents in some way, the man had sure been strange to him. As Kai had gone about his day, helping Mason with various projects, learning the ropes, the man had alternated between being curious, reluctant, kind, and standoffish. Kai had tried not to take it personally. It couldn’t be because of him. Aside from silently suffering from multiple bee stings, Kai hadn’t done anything wrong or inappropriate. He’d tried to be as friendly and helpful as he could, without seeming like an overeager suck-up. And he thought he’d pulled it off well, but his boss had still seemed uneasy around him.

Sighing as he shuffled to the bathroom, Kai shook his head. Maybe Mason was just trying to not show favoritism toward Kai to the rest of the team, since he was sort of a family friend. Yes, maybe he just didn’t want to appear like he was doing Kai any special favors. Stepping into the shower, he turned the water on and twisted the knob to scalding hot. No, Mason was definitely not treating him like he was special. Kai hoped today would be smoother.

He also hoped the hot water didn’t aggravate his tender spots. Quickly undressing, he gritted his teeth and stepped into the stream. He flinched as the hot water entered the slight pricks in his skin, then he sighed as the water relaxed him. The steamy shower was nearly as soothing as Jessie’s miraculous fingers. Smiling, he remembered the wondrous feeling of her hands running over his skin. Scrubbing a bar of soap over his body, he closed his eyes and visualized her soft fingers trailing over him. It had felt amazing, and he swore, for a moment there…it had been so much more than just a massage. For a second, a single thought had entered both of their minds, he was sure. A thought that involved bare bodies, tangled limbs, slippery oils…and a spacious bed.

As his mind took over, and his fantasies took flight, Kai started pretending that his hands were hers. The act of cleaning himself forgotten, he started tracing the distinct lines of his muscles. His body instantly reacted; warmth, blood, and a growing ache in his groin. Biting his lip, he knew he should stop this, knew he shouldn’t let himself think about her that way. Putting the soap back on the shelf, he rested his head against the shower wall. He’d gotten carried away, and his body was completely hard now, ready for a woman who wasn’t even around. A woman he couldn’t ever have again. Another sad sigh escaped him.

Ignoring the ache, Kai washed his hair. He kept his hands away from his waist and forcibly shifted his thoughts. His mind drifted to Jessie’s generous box of decorations that she’d brought over yesterday. The stupid but charming camel, the waterfall photo that painfully stoked memories of home, a few candles to help mask the scent of “bachelor,” and that one amazing picture of a red-rocked river. Kai liked that one the best. He had a special connection to water, and the photo impossibly and perfectly captured the flowing movement of a rushing stream. By the warm glow in Jessie’s eyes, he’d known that the picture meant something to her, but she’d given it to him anyway. She was so sweet and so good to him. In two days, she’d seen everything that he’d been missing, and without asking, she’d stepped in and taken care of it for him. He was blown away by her.

Thinking of her warm heart and generous nature did nothing to drain the need surging through his body. By the time he was rinsing off, his situation below hadn’t improved any. Looking down at himself, he shook his head and muttered, “You’re not helping anything, you know. We can’t have her.”

Amused that he was actually having a conversation with his throbbing manhood, he smiled…and considered. He was alone. He could satisfy the ache that was only growing stronger the longer he thought about it. He could close his eyes and let himself believe he was with her, let himself believe they were nothing more than strangers, that he could have her, over and over again, as often as he wanted.

His hand drifted down, his fingers barely brushing the stiff shaft. His body twitched at the contact, and his breath increased. God, what was he doing? Not sure, but knowing he needed more, he slowly curled his fingers around the thick, hardness. A low groan escaped him as he ran his thumb over the sensitive tip. Yes, he could do this. He could satisfy his own needs, moaning her name as he came. It would be clean, neat, efficient, and no one would have to know that he was pleasuring himself to the image of his cousin.