It's All Relative (19 page)

Kai didn’t react to her term either, only tilted his head at her statement as he swung his leg over his bike. After slinging his helmet over his handlebar, he walked up to Jessie. Standing directly in front of where she was leaning against her truck, he reached out for her hand. Loosely holding her fingers, he ran his thumb up and down the back of her hand. It was exquisite torture for Jessie, and she really hated how much she loved the slight caress.

Smiling warmly at her, Kai’s sea-green eyes swept over her face. “You don’t have to keep doing things for me, Jessie,” he whispered her name, and Jessie’s heart skipped a beat. No, the face-to-face absence had definitely not been a good idea. His presence was overwhelming her so much right now that she wanted to grab his neck and pull his mouth to hers. But…she couldn’t, not with that cousin word still hovering in the air.

As she absorbed the tender look in his eyes, she finally noticed what he was wearing. It was some sort of uniform: khaki slacks and a bright teal polo with the research center name in the corner. The color of the shirt emphasized the color of his eyes, even in the fluorescent glow of the parking lot lighting. He was even more spectacular, and for a moment, Jessie was too awed to answer him.

She moved away from the truck and into his body. Kai didn’t pull back, not even when she took a step forward and pressed the entire length of her body into his. He said nothing; he did nothing, other than part his lips as he started to breathe heavier. Clenching his hand, Jessie brought her other palm to his chest, resting it on the lean muscles she’d been picturing all day long.

She ran her fingers up to his shoulder, but he still didn’t step away, still didn’t react negatively to her nearness. In fact, his free hand drifted to her hip, pulling her into him. Feeling bolstered by his touch, Jessie moved her head closer to his. “I’ve missed you,” she breathed, her lips just mere inches from his.

Kai’s head lowered as his eyes half closed. “I missed you too, Jessie,” he whispered. His breath over her face made her feel weak, allowed her to ignore every warning bell going off in her brain. She knew they were too close, she knew they were being too intimate, but his hand on her hip was sliding around to her backside, and she just couldn’t care enough to stop him from touching her in that way. Honestly, he could touch her any way he wanted to right now.

Her fingers trailed up his neck to tangle in his dark hair. They moved toward each other simultaneously. The distance between their lips was slimming by the second, when suddenly a car zoomed around the corner, breaking the spell. The car had been going too fast for the tight turn, and slid out a little as it came toward them. Kai immediately grabbed Jessie and shoved her behind him.

The stupid sports car came within two inches of hitting the back of Jessie’s truck, before the driver finally regained control and continued speeding away. Yelling an obscenity at the asshole, Jessie glared at the red tail lights until they disappeared. What was it about fast cars that made people think they were invincible?

When the jerk-hole was gone, Jessie finally noticed how Kai was pressing her into the concrete wall, protecting her. Clinging to his shoulders, her fingers dug into his thick jacket as adrenaline pumped through her. She’d been so sure that car had been about to hit them or their vehicles, and Kai had thrown himself in front of her. No one had ever done anything like that for Jessie before, and a surprising rush of warmth filled her.

Kai stepped forward and then slowly twisted to look back at her. Jessie wasn’t sure if he was dazed by their near-kiss, the squealing vehicle that had almost smashed them, or the lingering feeling of protectiveness that was still hovering in the air. Either way, his breath was much quicker when he finally faced her again. Brows drawn together in concern, he searched her body. “Are you okay? Did I hurt you?”

It was only then that Jessie felt the slight ache in her shoulder from where he’d roughly shoved her into the wall. Not wanting him to feel guilt over shielding her, she smiled and shook her head. “No, I’m fine,” she said, reaching out a hand for him.

Looking relieved, Kai took it. As he squeezed her fingers, he gave her a devilish grin. “I didn’t realize you had such a dirty mouth.” Jessie blushed; the words she’d yelled at that maniac driver hadn’t been ladylike. Side effect of growing up with four brothers. Kai’s grin widened when he noticed her flush. “That was kind of hot.”

His smile immediately dropped, and he released her hand. Both looking torn, they stared at each other for a long, painful moment. They had nearly caved into the temptation to kiss each other—
really
kiss each other. Jessie was sure that if their lips had touched, it would have ignited the sexual tension between them, and they would have spent the night testing out the strength of Kai’s new headboard…the headboard that belonged to the woman who was a grandmother to them both.

Swallowing the bile in her throat, Jessie broke the silence by indicating her truck. “I brought you a table,” she muttered, not even sure if coming here was a good idea anymore.

At hearing her dejected tone, Kai’s face fell, but then he brightened as he looked over at her truck. “You did?” He walked over to examine the table in the truck bed, then looked back at Jessie, stunned. “You actually went out and found me a table?” He seemed perplexed that she would take the time to do that.

She shrugged. “I had one…we weren’t using it, so…”

Kai smiled at her as he shook his head. “You take care of everything, don’t you?” There was such love and warmth in his sentence that Jessie felt it in every cell of her body. The way he talked to her, the way he looked at her, it made Jessie want to do everything that she could for him, even if some of the things she wanted to do were wrong. Very wrong.

He studied her face for a moment, then shifted his gaze to the ground. “Thank you, Jessie,” he whispered, peeking up at her from the corner of his eye. Grinning, Jessie flushed with pleasure. God, she loved doing things for him.

Laughing a little as he moved to the back of the truck, Kai shook his head and said, “I should just get that printed on a t-shirt, since I seem to say it so much.”

Jessie laughed as she followed him. “You’re just being overly gracious. I really haven’t done all that much.”

As he pulled the table from the truck and set it on the ground, he gave her an incredulous expression. “You’ve done more than I ever could have…” He stopped and sighed, and a multitude of emotions passed over his face. Jessie wasn’t sure what they all were, but she thought she saw pain there. And longing.

Clearing his throat and shaking his head, Kai grabbed the table while Jessie grabbed the chairs. “Come on, I’ll make you something to eat. We’ll have dinner on my new table. It’s the least I can do.”

With a wistful smile on her lips, Jessie followed him.

K
ai unlocked his apartment and walked in with Jessie close behind him. He still couldn’t believe she’d been waiting for him when he’d gotten home, and he hoped she hadn’t been waiting long. Missy had held him up after work, begging for a ride on his bike. Politely refusing her, Kai had gotten out of there as quickly as he could by telling her that he was running late to meet someone. Little had he known that his lie was actually the truth.

And what a pleasant surprise that had been. Kai had been missing Jessie for a while. He hadn’t seen her since Monday night, and all day long she’d been on his mind, infiltrating his every thought as he’d stared at slides in a microscope. Somehow, Jessie had a way of even making cellular decomposition sexy. And knowing he shouldn’t think that way about her had kept Kai in turmoil for hours.

But upon seeing her, all that turmoil had lifted into joy. While he’d talked on the phone with her all week, Kai had missed seeing her. He’d missed her eyes, missed her smile, and missed the crinkle of her nose when she laughed. He’d missed…his cousin.

God, he hated that word. It was necessary to keep using it, although, sometimes Kai wondered if that word would ever truly be enough to keep them separated, to keep them from going down that disastrous road. But they had to keep trying to resist. As hard as it was, they had to try. Because willingly going down that path wasn’t an option.

As Kai closed his door behind Jessie, he thought over their heated moment in the parking garage. As they set the table and chairs up in the small kitchen space, he considered the horrible fact that he’d
wanted
it to happen. Sickeningly enough, he’d wanted her lips on his just as firmly as her breasts had been pressed against him. He would have done anything in that moment to not be related to her, to not feel the gut-twisting guilt that often accompanied the desire. Things would be so much simpler if they didn’t share the same blood, but some obstacles were insurmountable. Genes was one of them.

As Jessie sat at his new table, miming opening a menu and looking through the contents like a discerning food critic, Kai smiled at her. His heart was still pounding over the near-incident with that damn car in the parking garage, but given the same circumstances again, Kai would always try to keep her safe. Come to think of it, given all of the same incidences again tonight, none of his actions would probably change. Admitting that hurt his stomach. He shouldn’t let them get too close. At least, not like that. It wasn’t healthy for either of them.

Since he’d already treated Jessie to his out-of-this-world Spam sandwich, Kai decided to make the second dinner he could cook well: spaghetti. Jessie took in the amount he gave her with wide eyes, but said nothing. After placing their heaping plates down on the wrought iron table, Kai opened a bottle of red wine. He poured them each a glass, then sat down across from Jessie.

She thanked him with a warm smile, and Kai’s entire body heated at the look on her face. Sipping on his wine, he was again amazed at her generosity. It was like she spent all day thinking of ways to make him happy and comfortable. Kai didn’t think he actually took up that much space in her brain…but a small portion of him liked to think that he did. He forcefully tried to ignore that part of him.

They ate their messy meals in comfortable companionship, laughing whenever someone got a stray splash of sauce somewhere. When Jessie tenderly reached out and rubbed some off his chin, Kai momentarily wished that she had someone to nurture. Someone she could love and dote on with no awkward, guilty feelings. Someone worthy of her, much more so than that her asshole ex Jeremy had been. Jessie was so good to Kai…he just knew she would be amazing as a girlfriend. Someone else’s girlfriend.

Kai felt his throat constricting, and it took him a few swallows to ease the ache. Eventually that would happen, and Jessie would find someone to love. Girls like her didn’t stay single for long. Kai had no idea what he would do when her devotion to him was suddenly diverted to another man. And just the thought of her being with someone else made a surprising rush of jealousy flash through him. He hated the non-existent man already.

“You all right?”

Kai looked up at hearing Jessie’s concerned voice. Trying to look as carefree as he could, he brightly said, “Of course.” Pointing to Jessie’s half-eaten plate of spaghetti, he attempted to distract her from deciphering his mood by asking, “Is it okay?”

Jessie glanced at her plate and smiled. “It’s wonderful. I haven’t had spaghetti in forever.”

Kai felt a little guilty that he hadn’t made something more elaborate, even the sauce had been from a jar, but she seemed genuine with her answer. “Good…I’m glad.”

As he went back to eating, Jessie paused with her wine glass to her lips. Kai studied her thoughtfully while he chewed his food. She seemed like she wanted to ask him something. Wondering what she might possibly question him about made him a little nervous. If she brought up them, and what had almost happened downstairs…well, he wasn’t sure what he could say about it. Nothing that he should probably say out loud. It was best if Jessie didn’t know just how often he thought of her…how often he dreamt of her.

When she pulled the glass from her mouth, Kai froze; he was rigid with tension when her question finally escaped her lips. “Would you like to come to my place tomorrow night? Have dinner with me…and my roommates?” She added that last part after a momentary pause.

Relaxing, Kai swallowed his food and smiled. He’d been imagining much harder questions. “Sure, I’d love to see your place.” He thought about that for a second while she smiled. “Would your roommates…? I mean…has it been long enough…? Would they suspect that you and me…?” Kai let his voice trail off. He didn’t know how to ask her if her roommates would figure out that he was Jessie’s one night stand once they saw him. God, even thinking the question made him nauseated.

Knowing what he was vaguely referring to, Jessie immediately averted her eyes. “No, I don’t…I don’t think so.” She looked back with a shrug. “If I introduce you as my cousin, the thought shouldn’t even cross their minds. They’ll just assume that you and I would never…” She bit her lip as her cheeks turned a beautiful shade of pink.

Nodding, Kai took a large gulp of his wine. It seemed reasonable enough to think that her friends wouldn’t make that connection. Because who would suspect that, as family, they’d never met before that night? That, thanks to nicknames and lots of alcohol, they hadn’t recognized each other in the club. That they’d gone all the way without ever really finding out anything about the other. That they’d had mind-blowing sex without ever realizing that they shared the same last name.