It's Not About You (24 page)

April looked confused. "Breeders?"

"Let's go." I gave Kyle a
really
don't push it
glare before we set the alarm, locked the door and piled into his car.
 

Traffic was worse than I thought it would be. The only explanation I could think of was it was Thanksgiving week and everyone and their mother was trying to get out of town the day before. Or get into town.
 

While stuck on the perimeter, a mere mile from the exit and unable to get to it, I glanced over at April. "I am really sorry Burt did this."

"Pfft. Grace, this isn't the first time Burt's called us to do his dirty work."
 

That was news. "It's not?"
 

"No. He's done this ever since Tanae was in diapers." She half turned in the seat and faced me. "Remember when he left the house that night and you didn't know it?"
 

"You mean when he followed me around the house naked, demanding I stop what I was doing and have one of those adult conversations with him?"
 

"Wow. I didn't realize he'd done that. The story Brad and I got was that you were being unreasonable."
 

"About what?"

April shrugged. "He never said. He showed up at our door at one in the morning. Brad was ready to shoot him but I invited him in and gave him coffee. He said he'd left you and needed a place to stay."

"But…he stayed with a friend of ours, and her family."
 

"Because Brad told him no. He said he didn't want Burt's brand of crazy anywhere around his kids. Oh Brad picked up on the fact Burt wasn't playing with a full deck in the beginning. You didn't see it, but he did. He told Burt to leave and go back home once the idiot asked me to call you right there and talk some sense into you."
 

"Holy hell, April. I never knew he did that. I am so, so sorry."
 

"I know. But mom and I decided back then you didn't need any added stress. Remember that when he comes around. He used to call mom too and beg her to call you and talk sense into you."
 

"Mom never said a word." I thought about our mother and her kindness, her giving spirit, and wondered if was at the casino already. "Is she still in Vegas?"

"Yeah. She and that Women's League will be there till Sunday. Have you talked to her?"

"Not yet. I left a few messages, but she hasn't returned my call."
 

"Mine either. Huh. I can call her friend Vicki later today and see what's up."
 

The car moved and I glanced at Kyle's eyes in the rear view mirror. He looked at me and winked. God I loved this man. Every woman should have someone like him.
 

"So are you and Kevin….?"

She left it open for me to answer. "No. We tried. And we're friends." I rubbed at my thighs. "I can tell he'd like to try again but there's no…I don't know…"
 

"Spark?"
 

"You could say that. He's nice, good looking, got great kids, or at least his son's great. I can't tell with the daughter because I've never seen her face. She's always got it buried in her phone."
 

"Anyone else?"
 

"Anyone else what?"

April pulled her thin lips even thinner. "Grace…look at you. You've changed. You're thinner, in great health, your skin's smooth and you hold your shoulders back, you dress like you care again…and you have that sex glow."
 

Kyle laughed out loud.

"April!" I had never,
never
talked with my God fearing sister about sex! It was just…
wrong
.
 

"Well you do. I know that look. Want to know the scary part of it?"

"Other than the fact you said sex glow?" I blinked at her.
 

She laughed. It was an honest one too, no courtesy chuckle. "I first heard the expression from my daughter. Brad and I woke up early one morning and one thing lead to another—"
 

"Please. Ladies. I haven't eaten yet." Kyle said this with a smile.
 

"Oh hush. I know you're not the one that's got my sister's cheeks all pink." April said this with a casual push on the driver's seat before he looked back at me. "The point is at breakfast she came down the stairs, looked at me and said, 'oh God you and dad had sex. You've got that sex glow'." She laughed again. "I nearly melted right there. So I had her explain that to me." She pointed at me. "You've got that look. Is he new?"
 

I blinked. Kyle chuckled.
 

"You know something about this, fake boyfriend?" She pushed his seat again as he turned into the precinct.
 

Thank God! Saved by arrival!

Soon as he parked I got out of the car, but I heard him say, "Who's to say it's not a battery operated glow?"
 

Kevin met us at the door, dressed in a suit and tie. He had his badge in a wallet around his neck and I could see his holster under his jacket. "Good to see you, April."
 

They hugged and he and Kyle shook hands. Kevin turned to look at me. There was a short, odd hesitation between the two of us before we hugged. He gave me a hard squeeze before he let go and I prayed like hell he didn't say anything about Michael.
 

Not yet.
 

We followed him past the front desk to a back room where he had stacks of papers organized with pens. A carafe and styrofoam cups were on a table to the right and he gestured for us to sit down. Once settled, Kevin took out his phone and attached a microphone and turned it on.
 

He asked us to recount the events of the night before and we did, starting with me at the Redbox kiosk. Kyle told his part and then April told hers. Kevin listened, took notes even with the recording, and nodded. But I could feel his eyes on me too many times.
 

We each filled out forms, wrote out what we told him, and signed them. He gathered them into a folder with Burt's name on it—and it wasn't a small folder. "I'm inclined to believe Burt will try and come to your house tomorrow, Grace. There will be enough of you there that I don't think he'll try anything stupid."
 

April made a noise. "It is Burt we're talking about."
 

Kevin smiled. "I've missed you too, April."
 

I'd forgotten how much the two of them had enjoyed dissing Burt. Sometimes at my expense, especially when I just didn't want to think about him.
 

That's when I started missing Michael. Really missing him. I still hadn't heard from him. No texts. Nothing this morning. I texted him before I went to bed and when I woke up. I checked my phone and when I saw there wasn't a response I was both worried and a little miffed.
 

He could have at least texted a smile or something.
 

"Grace? You okay?"
 

"Yeah. Just thinking of all that cooking ahead of me. You're still coming, right?"
 

"Wouldn't miss it. I was going to suggest posting a black and white in the neighborhood, but since I'll be there, no need." He took the folder and stood. We stood too and he shook our hands before he lead us to the front.
 

He looked happy when we left him at the door. Once back in the car, April spoke up. "Hey Kyle, can we go by that grocer store over there? There are a few things I need and I won't have to pick them up on the way home."
 

"Sure. But I think Grace wanted to have lunch somewhere."
 

I spoke up. "We can store them at our house before we eat lunch."
 

"What time were you thinking of eating?" April checked her watch as Kyle drove the car across the street to the shopping center. "The kids are getting out early today and they're supposed to ride with Aunt Winnifred to her house. But Winnie has a bad habit of watching movies on her phone and not paying attention to what the kids are doing."
 

"I was thinking between eleven and twelve. Why? What time is it?"
 

Kyle laughed as he pulled into a parking spot. "It eleven thirty."
 

Oh wow. We were in the precinct that long? I pulled my phone from my purse to see the time for myself, but to also see if I'd received a text from Michael.
 

Nothing.
 

Not even an email.
 

Worry set in. Was he okay? Did he even make it home? Did something happen when he got there? Was it serious?
 

We piled out of the car and headed inside of one of the larger groceries. I didn't shop at this one that often because they were more expensive than the other large chains, but not as expensive as Whole Paycheck (Whole Foods). Kyle mentioned grabbing a few things in dairy as April and I strolled to the produce isles.
 

Everything looked sparkling and new and I had to admit their peppers, though priced through the roof, looked good. I tapped one of them just to make sure it wasn't a plastic decoy fruit. The old bait and switch.
 

April wanted to look at cakes since she was going to have to take a dessert to Brad's parents and didn't have time to bake one. The bakery there was huge so I tagged along behind her, picking up bagged cookies and brownies, fudge and cupcakes, taking a look at their price and putting them the fuck down.
 

How could this place still thrive at these prices? Gah!

I'd just meandered over to a freezer wall of ice cream cakes when I heard the voice. His voice. Michael's voice. But…how could it be him? He was in Oregon. I looked at an Oreo cake without really seeing it as I concentrated on the voice.
 

He spoke in a low voice with someone. A girl. And then he laughed.
 

I turned to greet him with a smile and a hug and stopped where I was.
 

It was Michael. His hair was brushed back and he wore his silver glasses. His hands were hidden in the pockets of his leather jacket, above my favorite pair of soft jeans and his boots. And attached to his arm was woman. Long blonde hair, slender build and a pleasant laugh.
 

They stood beside April at the counter and exchanged pleasantries. I couldn't see the girl's face but I could see his.
 

My vision tunneled as I focused on him and a montage of our time together played out in my head as I tugged on the golden bean at my throat. His touch, his scent, his body beneath mine, his body above mine, his kiss… And with each memory the sound of breaking glass. Yeah my imagination was a bit dramatic, but at that moment I was beyond reason. Or thinking.
 

I stood in front of the frozen cakes, a statue in my dark peacoat and jeans. I still had my hat on and pulled it down around my face as I watched the two of them pick out a beautiful chocolate and strawberry cake.
 

I was so focused on them I didn't see April as she approached. "Hey…oh dear God what is wrong?" She stood in front of me, blocking my view of them. Seeing her face snapped me out of my stare and I blinked. That's when I realized I'd been crying. My face was wet and I turned around to see Kyle standing behind me. He was looking at the cake counter, his eyes narrowed and his jaw set.
 

He had a few things in one hand but the other was clutched into a fist.
 

"Don't…" I whispered to him and reached out for his hand. "Give me the keys."
 

"Grace? What's going on?" April lowered her voice.
 

I didn't know what to say. How could I say anything? I'd never mentioned Michael to her. She had no idea how hard my heart just cracked. She put her arms over my shoulders as Kyle took her basket.
 

"April, here are the keys. You get your sister to the car. I'll get these things and be right out."
 

"Kyle I don't understand. What's wrong?"

And my dear, incredible best friend did something for me I will always be indebted for. "This happens sometimes. Memories of Burt and the things he said to her. She just needs reassurances that she has us. Take her to the car…I'll be right there."
 

I started to let April guide me out of the store but pulled at Kyle's hand. He looked down at me and I was taken again at how beautiful he was when he was angry. "Don't. Please don't."
 

"I can't promise that, Grace. Go to the car."
 

And I knew what he intended to do.
 

I just…didn't know how to stop him.
 

I bawled. I mean I brought on the ugly cry.
 

Not that I wanted to. I was ashamed to lose it like that in front of my sister. I was older and I was supposed to pull it together. But like the trooper she always was, she managed to pull order out of my chaos.
 

"I'm so sorry, Grace. I never knew Burt hurt you that bad. I mean, I should have known. You've been living with a crazy person all that time. And now with the pressures of starting over, the financial stress, Thanksgiving and keeping Tanae in college…" She squeezed me tight and I just kept bawling into her arms. "I should have realized what Burt's showing back up and doing his old shit again would mean for you."