Jamie Brown Is NOT Rich (18 page)

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Authors: Adam Wallace

Tags: #Children's Books, #humor, #Children's eBooks, #Literature & Fiction

BOOK: Jamie Brown Is NOT Rich
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‘Scores are tied at the end of the final. This is so exciting! We will now have a tie-break question. The captain must buzz in and the first correct answer wins. There will be no points off for an incorrect answer, so simply have a go even if you are not sure.

Are you ready, Haughton Smatherson the Fourth?’

The kid from Snobtown College nodded. He looked as nervous as I felt. Between us we had enough nervous sweat to fill an Olympic swimming pool, and you wouldn’t want to swallow a mouthful of
THAT
water when you were swimming.

I was nervous because I realised I was out of toilet words.

‘Are you ready, Jamie Brown?’

I nodded, but I was in trouble. Jefferson’s plan was working. He woke up out of his faint.

The Quizmaster pulled the tie-break question from his
pants
pocket.

‘Name the person nominated as the greatest card trickster in the world for twenty-one years straight.’

OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH!!! I KNEW THIS ONE! I ACTUALLY KNEW IT, AND HOVEL STREET WAS GOING TO HELP ME WIN IN SNOOTYVILLE! THIS WAS AWESOME!

BUZZ!!!

‘AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA - GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHH- HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH- HHHHHHHH!!!’

The other kid had buzzed in first!

He answered.

‘The greatest card trickster in the world for twenty-one years straight was Yevgeny Dosdonovic.’

‘INCORRECT!’
Dosdonovic’s reign lasted twenty years and eleven months.’

I breathed a massive sigh of relief, right into Jefferson’s face. He gagged, but we were still in the game.

‘If Snootyville Grammar answers correctly, they will win Academic Challenge. If they are incorrect, there will be a new tie-break question. As Snobtown College answered incorrectly, any member of Snootyville Grammar may buzz in with the answer.’

Jefferson went for his glory buzz, but I delicately blocked his hand …

… and kicked my own buzzer.

Nasty Jefferson glared at me. ‘If you get this wrong, poor trash, you will pay the price.’

I smiled at him.

‘Sorry, little Lord Fauntleroy, there’s no price to pay. The greatest card trickster in the world for twenty-one years straight was my hero, the amazing Mr Igor Kravoski.’

He paused for what seemed like twenty-one years straight.

‘CORRECT! SNOOTYVILLE GRAMMAR WINS ACADEMIC CHALLENGE FOR THE FIRST TIME IN TWENTY-SEVEN YEARS!!!’

It was the greatest moment of my life.

CHAPTER 25

A VISITOR
VISITS

I was exhausted when we got home. We sat and talked about the day. Mum and Dad were so proud of me, which was awesome.

Then the doorbell rang.

We went to the door, hoping it wasn’t Security again, or the Jeffersons, trying to ruin the day.

It wasn’t.

It was the cleaner, but all cleaned up. Mum screamed and gave him a huge hug.

‘Well that was unexpected,’ Dad said. ‘You two know each other?’

Mum let go of the cleaner and looked at us with tears in her eyes.

‘Yes we know each other,’ she said. ‘Marcus, Jamie, Katie, this is …


BARNABY
VON BARNABUS!’

We all ooooohed and aaaaaaahed and went inside. Barnaby was so nice. He said he had taken the job at the school as a cleaner when he knew we were coming. He wanted to be able to keep an eye on me, and make sure the other kids weren’t giving me too hard a time.

I thought about all the times he had helped and/or stuck up for me and/or mopped Jefferson in the face.

He also said that he knew about my nerves and my toilet problems (speaking-wise!) after overhearing me argue with the Jeffersons at Academic Challenge training.

‘And how about at the actual challenge?’ I asked. ‘How did you know I should start answering?’

He smiled.

‘Jamie, I never condone cheating, ever. Do you hear me? But those Jeffersons had set you up. They paid to see the questions, and they paid to have every question suit their own knowledge. They even researched all the other teams’ strengths and had the questions altered for that reason as well.’

‘How did you know all this?’ asked Dad.

Barnaby smiled.

‘I’m the cleaner. Kids laugh at me, they tease me, but they also think nothing of me. So I hear things they don’t want anyone else to hear. I see letters they don’t want anyone else to see. I know everything about that school, because everyone thinks I know nothing. They don’t know it, but by their attitude they are making me the most powerful person at that school! Anyway, it was all rigged. Especially the last round. They wanted the glory. So …’

He trailed off. Mum got it first.

‘No way,’ she said, eyes wide. ‘Not when you bumped into the Quizmaster? Not the old switcheroony?’

Barnaby nodded. Mum laughed.

‘I
told
you he was brilliant at sleight of hand, Jamie. Just like you!’

He
was
brilliant. As he bumped the Quizmaster, Barnaby had:

Flicked open the Quizmaster’s shirt pocket

Taken out the old questions

Put the old questions in his overalls

Taken out the new questions

Put the new questions back into the Quizmaster’s pocket

Stolen the Quizmaster’s apple, taken a bite and thrown it away

Closed the pocket and patted it nicely

He had just hoped the new questions were in the right order. I was rapt he had helped, but it made me feel like a bit of a fraud. Barnaby could tell I was upset.

‘The thing is,’ he said, ‘the Jeffersons hadn’t planned on a tie-breaker, so they hadn’t changed that question. And neither had I, it was in his pants pocket. I couldn’t and didn’t want to get it.’

It took a few seconds, but then I understood. It had been
me
. I had answered the final question. Hovel Street
had
saved me.

Barnaby nodded. Mum and Dad said again and again how proud they were of me. It was so amazing. Barnaby stayed. He said that he couldn’t yet reveal his identity to the world, as that would only cause trouble … so he actually
was
kind of like Batman!

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