Jesse's Soul (2) (20 page)

“I’m clean and tested. I promise,” he said, desperate for her to believe him.

“Jess, please...” Her words came out a ragged plea.

His hands were pressed into the mattress on either side of her. Jesse centered himself, and with as much control as he could gather, he slid into her, feeling a heat like he’d never known. Jesse gritted his teeth and willed himself to hold on—she needed more and he was bound and determined to give it to her, even if it killed him in the meantime. But then Emery arched into him again and he felt another thread of his tightly wound control break.

Lowering himself, Jesse kissed her lips, almost roughly,
then moved his mouth down her neck and to her breast. She squeezed his shoulders, gripping with her fingertips as he took her nipple in his mouth. He gently caressed her other breast with his hand. Emery sighed as she grasped at him. She wanted him to kiss her, then by all means, he’d give her his kisses. Urgent, heated, and claiming kisses.

As his tongue swept over hers, she came. He captured her soft moans and whimpers with his mouth. He continued to move
until a piercing cry escaped her. That was it. The last thread snapped. He grunted, feeling her contract around him. “Emery,” he said, panting. He held on for a handful of breaths, riding out her orgasm before he slammed into her one last time, harder than the rest, and stilled himself deep inside her.

Collapsing on top of her, he silently told her he loved her. “My God.”

“Jess…”

He couldn’t answer yet. She’d just turned his world upside down, and he’d never once in his entire life felt that damn good. Sliding off of her, Jesse shifted and pulled the covers over both of them, tucking Emery under his arm, tight against his side, her cheek on his chest.

“Em, that was amazing,” Jesse whispered as he stroked the silk soft skin of her back and then kissed her forehead. “I mean…wow.”

“Yeah. Most amazing…ever.” Her words were tired and verged on being slurred like a drunk.

It was certifiable. Tonight had been the best night of his entire life. Emery was a beautiful, strong woman who he’d been immediately attracted to, but to have her be that responsive to him was more than he could ever have even imagined. She arched into every touch, curled into every whisper of his fingers across her skin.

Adjusting the blanket that had slipped off her shoulder, Jesse hugged her closer, running his palm over the leg and hip she had draped o
ver his. He had waited his entire adult life to find true love. Letting a relaxed breath out, Jesse knew his true love had just fallen asleep on his chest where she belonged, her warm, sweet breaths blowing across his heart.

Coming out of a sleep that deep, it took a second for him to realize he hadn’t been dreaming, and Emery was still sound asleep
on his chest—where she belonged. He lifted his head to see that it was after ten and they had been asleep for over two hours. Even though it couldn’t be considered much more than a nap, it was still the best two hours of sleep he’d ever had. Pulling Emery tight, he drank in her perfume and kissed her forehead.

She started to stir.

Damn it.

He had hoped she might just stay asleep in his arms all night. Jesse grinned when she tried to open her eyes. He could tell she was exhausted. Not only from the last month of being on the road and the stress of races, but something was off with her health. Now that he knew exactly what was wrong with her, and with the thought of what the future could dish out, he was more terrified than before.

But he would never let her know that.

Emery stretched, then nestled back against him. If his heart swelled any more he was afraid it’d burst. It was amazing, how such little gestures could mean so much. He loved feeling her rub her cheek against his chest like she was doing right now. Loved her arm draped across him, but also holding him tight as if she didn’t want to let go either.

“Well, honey…”

“Mmm?”

“I think we just proved this is going to work between us.” He placed another kiss on her head.

Emery brought her palm to his jaw and, with the lightest of touches, stroked his whiskers with her thumb. With that simple move, he
thought he’d died and gone to heaven.

“I think you’re right. I’ve never felt like this before, Jesse,” she said quietly before she pressed her soft lips to his chest.

Rising up on her elbow, she sat up enough to lean in and kiss him, her lips warm and still soft, even after all the time he’d possessed them. She was beautiful with her just fucked hair and her bedroom eyes. Her dark lashes lowered, blocking the longing he saw in them, then she attempted to roll out of his grasp.

Jesse flexed his hold, not ready to let her go. “Where y
ou going?”

“It’s after ten-thirty.”

“No…don’t go, Em.” He rolled to face her and brushed her hair from her face, intent on being able to read as much as he could in her eyes. He tucked a strand behind her ear, trailing the back of his hand down her neck to her chest. He saw the whisker burn on her skin.

“Oh, God, baby, I’m so sorry.”

That sinking feeling came over him. Just looking at the red lines and scratches had him choking up and wanting to do whatever he could to make it up to her. He ran his fingertips gently over the places his whiskers had abraded her.

“I’ll shave it off.”

“Don’t you dare!”

The fire in her words shocked him. She placed her palm against his jaw again, and he leaned into it for the comfort she was offering.

“I love it. I don’t know how you keep it that way, but I’ll kill you if you shave it. I love it and it makes you so damn sexy.”

“But, Em, your skin is so tender. It’s all scratched up. I’m so sorry.”

Emery grinned, wiggling her eyebrows. She leaned into him like she was going to spill something top secret. “That’s my proof.”

Sure she was acting cute and trying to make him feel better, but knowing all it took was a glance her way and he’d see the red marks, knowing he’d put them there…that wasn’t settling well with him. Emery was the last person in the world he’d ever hurt, even if it was unintentional and fairly minor. In the end—there were marks. She was right, there was proof.

He curled his lip, ready to cringe at what she meant. “I’m afraid to ask…your proof?”

“Yeah proof. Proof t
hat I got to have sex with the sexiest man alive. You should be on the cover of
People
.”

“Oh, hell.” Jesse shook his head in disbelief at her statement, but the other half of that equation he was certain of. “I don’t know about that, but I think you’re the sexiest woman alive.”

She glanced away for a moment, when she turned back, hesitation crossed her face. “I don’t really…want to talk about being with other men while I’m in bed with you, Jesse. But I’m telling you, I’ve never, ever felt this good before. I mean…ever.”

It touched him that she was taking both sides of his feelings into consideration instead of just blurting out something that could be taken the wrong way. She understood he could be hurt on one hand, and she could give him cause to celebrate on the other. The corner of his mouth rose. Plus, she was being open with him about sex. What man didn’t want that?

“I’m serious. Every time you touch me, it…like…sets me off or something. I have to admit, Jess, it’s kinda embarrassing.”

“Don’t you ever be embarrassed with me, you got it? I’ll admit to you now…you have no idea how much it excited me that I barely touched you and that’s all it took.” He winked at her. “I’m a man. I’m telling you the truth when I say that does a lot for a guy’s ego.”

He may have had humor infused in his statement for her benefit, but it was the straight line truth. Part of that was the fact it’d been so long for her, but eh, it was his touch that made her feel good. Still lying stretched out alongside of him, Emery grinned as she ran her fingers over his chest and her cheeks flushed all of a sudden.

“Well, I’ll help your ego even more then, because that’s never happened before. As a matter of fact, while we’re being so honest, I’ve almost never had more than one orgasm in a night. Maybe two if I was lucky once or twice.
But tonight, like that, back to back, has never happened before. It was like I hadn’t finished the first yet, and you already had another one building,” she said, her eyes on her fingers, not on his face.

He had wondered why she had gotten so upset and tried to fight the first orgasm he gave her with his fingers. It was a lot for her to admit that much, so he wasn’t going to make her say it. She hadn’t been able to look him in the eye, but at least she’d told him.

Collin strikes again.

Jesse knew she’d learn to trust him, and on a certain level, she already did. But there were layers to trust that were earned over time and through experiences. She’d had her heart torn apart and her trust shattered, but at least that man hadn’t been able to touch her self-confidence. He would take what she had already, build her trust back up and put her heart back together. Her health might not have been anything he could fix, but as a person, Jesse would bring Emery back to who she’d been before.

“I want to be the man to give you all the pleasure you can stand, Em. I want to make you feel good. It’s amazing how responsive you are to me. Like I said, I think we work. You can’t be this good together in bed and not be compatible out of it. And I like that you’re so open, even if it’s hard to talk about.”

Running his hand up her arm to her shoulder, he lightened hi
s touch as he traced her collarbone, the hollow of her neck, and then swirled his finger around her breast, each circle growing closer and closer to her nipple.

“Well, again, that is because of you. I was never like this before.” She hissed
on the last word.

“You like this, huh?” He smiled, stroking her.

“Seriously? Uh…yeah.”

“So, you weren’t like this, what do you mean?”

“I never felt this…I guess
secure
is the word I’m looking for? I wouldn’t talk openly like this with”—her brow scrunched—“well you know who…and never in bed. And I would never have admitted to not coming some times. A girl can fake it pretty good, especially if she thinks that’s the way it’s supposed to feel. I just had no idea what I’d been missing.” She leaned in, softly touching her lips to his chest. “I don’t know, I’m just different after being sick, and I hate to bring it up again, but after being left like that, I’m just…different.”

“I hate that you’ve gone through all that and I wish y
ou had never had to feel that kind of pain, both physically and emotionally. But, I’m a silver linings kind of guy, and I have look at it as it brought us together.”

With her chin in between his thumb and forefinger, he touched his lips to hers, pulling back painfully slow and immediately going back for more. His tongue slipped through her lips, just barely touching hers before he broke the kiss.

“Otherwise, it would eat me up inside just thinking about what you’ve been through.” He pressed yet another kiss to her lips, then closed his eyes as he nuzzled his nose against her cheek.

Pulling back, the smile she gave him held every promise he’d been longing for. Leaning toward him, Emery pressed her lips to his shoulder, and then glanced behind it. He knew what she’d find.

Damn clock.

“It’s almost eleven.” She sighed. “I’ve got to go. You need your sleep and I need mine.”

He wasn’t about to try and hide it from her. He would have given anything for her to turn off the lamp on her side and curl up tight beside him for the night.

“Don’t go,” he whispered. “Stay here.”

“Jesse.”

“Please, Em. Spend the night.”

“I would, but without knowing what’s going on, I think my dad would be worried. Another time?”

“Promise?” Jesse didn’t care that he was damn near on his knees begging and he would hold her to the promise. He’d found his other half and he would fight like hell to keep her.

She smiled. “Yeah, I promise.”

They laughed and talked as they got dressed. She chuckled as she put the cake away and he put the cork back in the wine. Then h
e walked her to her dad’s motorhome with her fingers laced in his. Jesse took her in his arms as they stood outside the open door.

“Thank you for letting me in, Em.”

“Thank you for trying so hard.” She smiled as she placed her palm against his jaw. “I love your shadow.”

“I love everything about you.”

He lowered to kiss her. What started out as an innocent kiss goodnight quickly heated into more the instant Emery parted her lips for him. She wound her arms around his neck. He threaded his fingers through her belt loops, pulling her hips to his, showing her what she was doing to him. Her arms tightened as if he wasn’t close enough and she needed him inside her.

Knowing her father was on the other side of the door, he grasped for control again. Tucking his face into her neck, smelling her perfume one last time for the night, he whispered, “Everything, Em. Good night.”

“Night, Jess.” She smiled as he held her hand going up into the motorhome. He winked then shut the door behind her.