Judy Garland on Judy Garland (56 page)

JG:
I've had many.

LL:
But could you just think of one now and just tell us about it?

JG:
Yes, I think being in love with Mark Herron is the best thing that ever happened to me.

LL:
Being in love with Monsieur Herron …

JG:
Yes.

LL:
[It] has given a new dimension to your life? And to your life as an artist and as a person?

JG:
Yes.

LL:
Does Monsieur Herron manage your [career?]

JG:
No, no, he's a wonderful actor.

LL:
Of his own right.

JG:
Yes.

LL:
But he gives, from the height of his artistic knowledge, a certain thing to your career which was lacking before?

JG:
He gives me just love.

LL:
And that's enough, surely. Now, Madame Garland, I understand that there are a lot of other people who are waiting and who want to talk to you, and I simply would love if in the course of the week you would be so—

JG:
[Interrupting.]
Oh, by the way, I give him love, too.
[Laughs.]

LL:
I have no doubt about that. I was wondering, Madame Garland, whether if, let's say tomorrow, God forbid, all right, God forbid, that you …

JG:
That I die?

LL:
No, that you would retire from the stage.

JG:
Oh.

LL:
What would you do?

JG:
I'd
cook!

LL:
But where did you learn to cook? At M-G-M.?

JG:
Oh, no, I didn't have
time!
Actually, I had difficulty sleeping, so I learned to cook during the night.

LL:
Instead of sleeping.

JG:
Yes.

LL:
Well, that's very productive!

JG:
Yes.

LL:
Most people, they toss around, and you get up and you cook.

JG:
Yes.

LL:
Do you remember any difficulties you've ever had cooking this way?

JG:
Oh, good heavens! My youngest daughter has a pussycat who takes great pleasure in getting under my feet when I have a hot dish in my hands.

LL:
Oh my. And what happens to the dish and to you?

JG:
No, I kick the cat! [All
laugh.]

JD:
In the next suite, press, radio, television, and other unclassifiable inquisitors waited for their chance to try at some of those questions and a few new ones.

Press:
Judy, what do you think that you most missed as a teenager?

JG:
Eating! [All
laugh.]

Press:
Did you have to stay a certain measurement or something in those days?

JG:
Yes, yes.

Press:
Judy, what is the secret of your recent diet? You've lost a lot of weight and you look just fabulous, but how'd you do it?

JG:
Thank you.

Press:
But how'd you do it?

JG:
I fasted. [All
laugh.]
I did. Really. For thirty days.

Press:
No kidding?

JG:
Yes.

Press:
Judy, what feeling do you get when you walk onto the stage and get the acclaim that you receive, say, at the O'Keefe Centre?

JG:
Oh, I feel great gratitude.

Press:
Have you the vaguest idea why they feel the way they do about you?

JG:
[Shakes head no.]
No, I don't.

Press:
Do you think they love you?

JG:
Well, they make a lot of noise. [All
laugh.]

Press:
Judy, you've become a living legend. Do you ever wish you weren't?

JG:
Isn't it awful? [All
laugh.]

Press:
Do you often wish you
weren't
a living legend?

JG:
Yes, I do.

Press:
Do you ever go to a town where you're not known? I mean, do you ever sneak into a town?

JG:
[Shakes head no.]

Press:
You can't walk down the street?

JG:
No. Except when I was very fat. [All
laugh.]

Press:
Which do you enjoy doing more: television or screen?

JG:
Or eating?

Press:
Or eating! [All
laugh.]

JG:
I like screen better.

Press:
Why is that?

JG:
Well, because I can't find the cameras on television.
[Laughs.]

Press:
Miss Garland, if I was your fifteen-year-old daughter would you encourage—

JG:
[Interrupting.]
You may
be! [All laugh.]

Press:
Judy, what's your favorite song?

JG:
“Over the Rainbow”! [
All laugh.]

Press:
Are you interested in politics at all?

JG:
Sometimes. Sometimes, yes. I don't know too much about them, but I'm interested in world affairs, yes.

Press:
You campaigned for Mr. Kennedy, didn't you?

JG:
Yes, I did. In Europe.

Press:
Who could vote there? The troops?

JG:
Yes, the troops.

Press:
The US Armed Forces.

JG:
Yes.

Press:
Have you any formula when you do get tired or you get depressed, as performers do? What do you do to pull yourself up again and get that marvelous gift that you have? People have called you or compared you to a phoenix, rising up.

JG:
I slap myself on the hip. I do! In the wings.
[Slaps hip three times.]
Like an old pony.

Gypsy
was a morning talk show hosted by Gypsy Rose Lee for San Francisco's KGO-TV. According to Noralee Frankel, author of
Stripping Gypsy: The Life of Gypsy Rose Lee,
“Gypsy chose a diverse array of celebrity guests…. Many revealed—or pretended to reveal—little-known aspects of their private lives. The show relied on informality and sexual humor, which suited Gypsy perfectly.”

When Judy Garland taped the show in August 1965, the energy exuded from the banter between these two powerhouse talkers was inexorable. Although it is certain that the show was taped during the latter part of August 1965, there are discrepancies when it comes to the actual airdate. Some sources say August 30, 1965, while others claim September 13. The conflicting dates may be due in part to the fact that the show was syndicated by Seven Arts Television and likely aired on different dates and at different times throughout various markets.

Not included (but referred to) in this transcription was Gypsy's ambiguous introduction of Judy through a lengthy telling of having been introduced to Spencer Tracy on the M-G-M lot by Fanny Brice in 1937. After several minutes, and to the delight of her audience, Gypsy finally curtailed her rambling recollection: “At M-G-M, at the same time, there was the biggest star of them
all,”
she said. “And she's our guest today.”

Gypsy Rose Lee:
Oh, hello. I'm so glad you're with us because I want you to meet my guest today. I'm so happy to have her. Judy Garland.
[Audience applauds.]
You see, that long story about Spencer Tracy really didn't make sense at all. I bet you thought I had Katharine Hepburn, didn't you?
[Audience laughs.]
See, I fooled ya! That's the way we do it around here.
Oh, deceptive people. During that intermission, we were talking about the film Judy was making at M-G-M at that time. Sophie Tucker was the big …

Judy Garland:
Sophie Tucker owned the boarding house, and Mickey Rooney, I think, was a jockey, wasn't he?

GRL:
He was.

JG:
That's right.

GRL:
But Fanny [Brice] wasn't in that picture, was she?

JG:
Fanny wasn't in that, no. Just Sophie was in it. And
I
was in it.

GRL:
Yes, I know!

JG:
And there were a couple of
horses
in it.
[Laughs.]
Losers, I think.
[Laughs.]
I don't really remember.
Thoroughbreds Don't Cry
was the name of it, and I think that they'd arranged for it to be made with the leading child star at the time, who was Freddie Bartholomew. But Freddie's voice changed.
[Gypsy laughs.]
And he suddenly went
[sings high notes, then low].
And so they got a new boy, Ronald Sinclair, I think his name was, and just put him in this starring role. It was kind of a rough go on him, I guess.

GRL:
Oh, of course it was.

JG:
Well, they ground him up into little bits of cement or something and no one has
heard
of him since. Not even as a
person.

GRL:
Nobody realized, I don't think, Judy, until you spoke of it one night on the
Jack Paar Show,
the terrible injustice that was done to
all
of you people, actually. You know, you think of someone being a great big famous movie star, how wonderful it is for her … But,
my,
when you realize they're pitting one of you against the other! They used Deanna Durbin to threaten you, didn't they?

JG:
Well, no, they couldn't use us … we were on different lots, but they used, I remember … They got mad. Some of the executives had a fight, and Deanna Durbin and I were at an awful age when no one existed. You
either had to be seven years old or you had to be twenty. You know, an in-between. There were no teenage … nothing. So we just hung around and sort of went to school and didn't know what we were there for. So finally they
fired
Deanna, and they were going to fire me, too, but Universal picked up her option, you see—or her contract, I should say—and then they made a star of her, and M-G-M got so mad at Universal they just said, “Well, we've got a girl that age, too!” So that's the only reason I really got a job. Because Deanna Durbin was a big seller.
[Audience laughs.]
And then, you know, they had these
backbreaking
hours that we used to work. Mickey and I would go to work, I would say, on a Monday morning we would check in about five o'clock. Well, I've got a funny story I must tell you. There was a man at the gate. He'd been there for a
hundred
years. He was really just like an old totem pole.
[Gypsy laughs.]
But you couldn't get into M-G-M without his letting you through, you know. So for a few years I had to walk through and he
always
stopped me. You know, I'd say, “Hello, my name is Judy Garland.” He'd say, “Well, you're not on the list. [All
laugh.]
He'd say, “I'll have to call a couple of people.” I'd think,
Well, I'm gonna be late for school and I already called a couple…
So I was always late. And finally, after being there for … sixteen years I was at Metro … I was absolutely terrified. Terrified! All sixteen years. It really was brainwash time. And they fired me and I was very happy about it, but I wanted to get a few things out of my dressing room.
Personal
things, you know, my own things. And I went back with my own car and I was wheeling in to Metro and he said, “Just a minute!” Same man. And I said, “Well, now, we've done this fandango for
so
many years. I'm not trying to get into a film. I just want to get in and get my things out of my dressing room. And he said, “You're not on the list.” [All
laugh.]
And they really never let me in! They wouldn't, and I never got my things out of my room.

GRL:
You never
did
get them?

JG:
No, I couldn't get by that man! [All
laugh.]

GRL:
Incredible!

JG:
I know! He was given orders to
shoot
at anybody … [All
laugh.]
I think his name was Dore Schary. He was in the uniform.
[All laugh.]

GRL:
Of course, I had such stars in my eyes in those days. The thought of just being in a movie, I didn't care
what
they did to me! They could put on a long, blonde wig, and change my name, and give me a peculiarly shaped mouth. And [they] loaded me down with clothes. They gave me everything I
didn't
need, you know?
[Judy laughs.]
But I didn't really care. I was just so happy to
meet
all the movie stars, you know, and I had three autograph books and almost full before they canceled me out.

JG:
Well, I think that's
darling.

GRL:
I was working on my third autograph book … [All
laugh.]

JG:
Why don't you forge some?

GRL:
You know, since then I've done that.

JG:
Have you?
[Laughs.]
Certainly. I do with pictures around the house.