KATE GOSSELIN: HOW SHE FOOLED THE WORLD - THE RISE AND FALL OF A REALITY TV QUEEN (21 page)

This is not true of course. Kate was given the opportunity to view the episodes and ask for changes before they were broadcast. I read emails where Kate requested that certain scenes be edited or cut completely because she didn’t like how she was being portrayed. In one particular email, she said that “overall” it was a “good hour,” but she wanted “a few things” changed:

• Kate noted that
  “there’s a little too much crying in the hair braiding scene…” and she really didn’t want all the nasty emails about it.
  
• She said that
  in the cake decorating scene where she was referring to Collin wanting to help, Joel was shown.
  
• She followed that comment by saying “
  the way I am shown sending him away (what I am saying) is not good... Could we cut that out please?”
  

Kate then complained that the
licensed song at the end “is plain hideous!!!!” and the lyrics were not appropriate for a Fourth of July episode where they were watching fireworks. She described the kazoo music used during the episode as “horrible!” and asked if it was possible to find a new music composer for the series because she wished she could hear “what good music would sound like!!!!” Kate said all this “as kindly as possible, of course!!!!” and signed off with her standard “Thanks! Have a gr8t day!”

After Kate sent her email with her change requests,
Jen Stocks replied to Jon and Kate, assuring them that the changes Kate had requested were being made. She said they had also heard from Julie May about concerns Jon and Kate had about the FAQ episode, and she wanted to let them know they were making the changes they requested right away. Jen apologized that they had included shots and information that were upsetting to them.

Jen
later sent another email with a link to view the revised FAQ episode. She said they had addressed Jon and Kate’s notes, and Wendy’s notes, but they should let her know by the next morning if they wanted anything else removed or revised.

In
an email from September 25, 2008, Kate asked if her words “I don’t want this in (the episode)” could be removed from a conversation between her and Jon without removing the rest of the conversation, which she liked. She said she wanted to make the episode “friendlier” so they wouldn’t “get shot again.”

Jen
emailed Kate to thank her for her quick notes and to let her know that it was “no problem” for them to edit that out.

SCHEDULING REAL LIFE

The
Gosselin’s lives were very heavily scheduled. From the sound of things, it doesn’t look like too much of real life was “just happening” on its own.

In June of 2008,
Kate was becoming increasingly agitated about scheduling issues. When the issues over scheduling and operations came to a boiling point for Kate, Jen Stocks bore the brunt of Kate’s wrath. A series of emails between Kate and Jen highlight the tensions.

In one of those emails,
Kate gave Jen the following instructions:


      
Reschedule the yard sale.


      
Email a detailed plan to her for the week by the next day.


      
Provide them (Jon and Kate) with plans by three days before the next week’s shoot. (Kate said, “The “disorganization is not working well.”)


      
Let them know what was wanted from them on each day, then Kate would “pick the time slots that work best for us.”


      
Verify whether the beach house was officially reserved, but “... NOT in our names” and let Kate know the exact dates it was reserved for.


      
Schedule a meeting with “production, Wendy, Steve and Julie to iron out the continuing oversights, lack of organization etc.” (Kate said there were major issues every week and “Jon and I are MORE than frustrated!!!!! We are hoping everyone involved sees the importance of such a meeting.... We can’t go on like this!”)


      
Work out a plan that suited them all, kept them safe, and worked for them and not against them.

On June 16, 2008, at 8:30 AM, Jen Stocks
replied to Kate to let her know the schedule for the week. I guess Kate needed advance notice of what she was going to be doing in her real life for the next week as well. Jen told Kate that she had tried “many times last week to get the plans for this week confirmed with you, and I am still waiting on you to tell me if we can do interviews on Friday. I emailed you this week’s schedule, as it existed last week, on Thursday. And that is when you decided that you wanted to make changes.”

Jen sounded perplexed when she wrote that she wasn’t
sure “when we have ever done anything at a time that did not suit you.” She reminded Kate that “you are the one who always chooses the times, we work around your schedule, always.” Jen then started talking about work and assured Kate that the beach house had been booked “under Deanie’s name from June 29th-July 13
th
.” She then listed a very detailed schedule for the week which included the family’s activity, day and time.

Even with Jen spelling out each day’s activities, Kate was still aggravated with the disorganization of her real life schedule. She took exception to Jen telling her that she had tried to get Kate’s input when Kate was in NYC. Kate said, “Unfortunately, I could never be expected to confirm a schedule while in NYC (without my calendar) with my 8 kids, doing three appearances and two additional shoots for the show, one of which was a disorganized mess!” Kate told Jen that she had to wait until she got home to think it through, but her point was that they should not be waiting until days before that week.

Kate
also told Jen that they should be “finalizing the schedule for TWO weeks from now.... Not this weeks schedule.” She said “Trust me, the results will be better!!! I dont work well last minute!” Kate then let Jen know that they would leave for the Thomas the Train visit at 9:30, and that she wasn’t sure which other activities they would be doing because it depended on “crowds, moods etc.” Kate said she would know when they got there and saw the setup.

Given all the tension,
Jen was ready to walk out. On June 17, 2008, Kate sent Jen a “heart-to-heart” email to explain herself and to apologize. Kate said she knew Jen was hurt and wanted to let Jen know that, despite being very frustrated with operations, it was nothing personal. Kate told Jen, “You are the ‘front line’ person and you receive the brunt of the explosion” even though “most times” the problem is “something that is not your direct doing.” Kate then uttered words rarely heard from her. She said: “For handing you those explosions of frustration, I am sorry! For any rude/unacceptable comments or behaviour I am sorry as well.”

Kate went on to explain to Jen what a tough position they were in because they have eight children who “in a million years” they could “never spend the amount of time with each that we want.” She talked about how well the show was doing in the ratings and how, with that and all their other commitments, they had “TONS to do and no time to complete it all.” Kate also mentioned security issues that were escalating daily, and how everything was causing her and Jon to be very stressed out, overworked and short-fused. She
said, “It is more of a daily thing to be stressed out beyond belief as the pressure cooker continues to cook.” Kate then spelled out to Jen things she would appreciate:

• Having a schedule a full week or more in advance.
  
• Organization (location, addresses, who they were going to meet with and at what time, etc.).
  
• Having a say about WHO came to their house as part of the crew.
  
• A crew without opinions.
  
• Respect for their privacy and property.
  
• Crew members who were informed about recent security issues and would watch out for them.
  
• Crew members who would respect their home (i.e., always putting things in the exact locations requested; cleaning up equipment, trash, and toys that were moved for interviews).
  
• A crew that would consider ALL that they were doing (marketing/media shoots, speaking engagements) and understood when they were frazzled.
  

Kate also told Jen “honestly, if you aren’t here producing in our house, I don’t want to do this anymore.” She pleaded with Jen to stay on, saying “you have been here with us since the beginning, our kids know and love you and we want YOU to continue to do this job!” Kate then suggested that Jen go ahead and take a break, but then come back to them because no one could replace her .... “Honestly.”

The next day, Jen sent Kate an email thanking her for the apology and kind words, saying she really appreciated it.
Kate forwarded Jen’s response to Wendy Douglas of Discovery, thanking Wendy for her “honesty in alerting us to a problem…” The logical assumption is that Jen must have told Wendy about the problems she was having with Kate.

After Jen thanked Kate, she
immediately switched back to work mode, talking about getting a schedule made up for the next week and shooting the family’s preparation and packing for their beach trip. She asked Kate if they could squeeze in one interview, but said she knew they had music video stuff to get done so it might not work out. Jen signed off by saying she would talk to Kate soon.

In reviewing the content of these emails,
and the escalating tension, one exceptionally disturbing fact stands out above the rest. It is the fact that the entire family was under a tremendous amount of stress. Reading Kate’s words about the “pressure cooker” they were in, and “explosions of frustration,” it would be ridiculous for anyone to try to argue that the kids weren’t feeling a significant amount of stress as well. They were required to participate in all the filming, and in marketing and interviews and photo shoots. Also, Jon and Kate would not have been able to hide all the tension they were feeling from the children, so the children would have felt that as well.

The schedules sound like they were exhausting. It is hard to imagine adults handling such pressures well, much less thinking that kids would be able to handle the relentless filming and instructions and direction, and all the extras they had to participate in.

And for someone who raved in interviews about the wonderful crew being like family members, Kate certainly had a lot of complaints about them in that list of things she told Jen she would appreciate.

Kate’s words to Jen, above all else, expose the reality of filming a reality TV show. They reveal the toll such filming takes on a family, and should be
taken as a warning to all those who would agree to open their life to the world in such a way. If TLC were, in fact, filming a family just running around doing their normal, everyday business, as Kate has always argued, there would never have been such high and such constant levels of stress.

As a final point, Jen Stocks ultimately did leave the show and was replaced by another producer.
But the show continued merrily along. Kate must have forgotten that she didn’t want to “do this” anymore if Jen wasn’t producing their show.

EPISODES OF LIFE

Kate
was being a big helper by providing ideas for episodes, while also working in as many new freebies as possible at the same time. In an email to “all”, Kate said she would love to add the trainer episode where she would be doing weight training, but that would have to be filmed at the end of the month because she couldn’t weight train following surgery until April 30
th
. Other ideas she suggested were building a dog house, which would go with the wireless fence training; showing the passport process for the kids (with applications and photos); updating the Sam’s club or grocery store visit where the “(kids scramble to help put stuff away-- SO cute!)”; installation of the crooked houses; the birthday party for the “little kids”; mothers day; and the southern leg of her book tour which was beginning in North Carolina. Kate said it would be great if they could get those items scheduled in April around her “ridiculously busy schedule”.