Authors: Buried Memories: Katie Beers' Story
Memory can also regenerate. I used to think that erasing memory would be helpful in surviving such ordeals. The blurring of painful details dulls the sensation. It did for Katie, for a long time. Her foster parents helped to blot out her old world and create a new and vastly improved one in its place, an immeasurable gift. It gave Katie time to grow up, without tragedy defining her, and the ability to revisit her past when she was in a better place, stronger, older and with loving support. The memories returned slowly when she was ready to face them. She takes them out only occasionally now, as needed, brushing off the dust to see what lies beneath.
When they come without warning, Katie is usually unjarred. Such was the case when I received a handwritten letter sent from Sing Sing Correctional Facility in Ossining, New York, from Inmate # 94A6357, and shared it with her.
Dear Mrs. Gusoff,
You don’t understand how it is in prison, everytime something happens about my case out there, I get punished in here. Inmates say bads things to me and I must endur it. Ive had an excellent record throu out that time. I know Im guilty of my crime, but I beleave Ive been punished enough. I mean I didn’t kill anyone, and when I started my crime I really thought it would be good for the both of us, now I know I was wrong. The only thing I wish for is to die in freedom, thats all I dream of. I think Katie knows I will always wish her well. I’m sorry for what Ive done, Im sorry I even thought it up. It was a mistake.
If you write this book I will be punished again and again, It doesn’t matter if the book shows me in a good or bad light, it will take away all hope for me to die in freedom.
The only way I could possibly give you an interview is if I was free, all other ways would just punish me in here. Im a old man with bad health please don’t bring back all the things we both should forget, It cant do any good for Katie, and for me it would destroy all my hopes. Please tell Katie I wish her and the family the very best.
Yours Respectfully
John Esposito
Katie, busy with a toddler son, a new job, and baby on the way, didn’t say much in response, other than a snarky comment that again, even now, John is only thinking of himself.
Soon after, like most of my routine communication with her, this one came in the form of an e-mail, with a decidedly unceremonious subject line: Update. It was, however, anything but ordinary.
“Things are going great here so far, just adjusting to being a mommy of a two-year-old & a newborn! Halee Katherine was born on July 28 at 5:22 pm. She weighed 6 lbs 7.2 oz & was 19 1/4 inches long. She looks exactly like Logan.”
Halee Katherine. I whispered the name aloud and it choked me up. Then, I opened the attachments. The face of a newborn baby girl stared back at me, a beautiful little thin lipped, plump-cheeked angel with almond shaped brown eyes and full lids that were unmistakable. She looked exactly like Katie.
I shared the news with Chief Varrone that Katie had given birth
to her second child—a baby girl. Like a proud Papa, he spread around the department photos of his girl cuddling her newborn in her arms. Coincidentally—perhaps not —his own daughter, Catherine, was due to give birth to her second child any day.
“Here,” he said, when I saw him next, dropping a few pages of copy paper into my hands—an email thread between him and Katie. It included his note to department heads.
It has been nineteen years since Katie Beers was abducted and secreted underground for seventeen days. It is comforting to know that not only did she survive her ordeal but she went on to have a productive, rewarding life. Please enjoy these photos of her with her second child (who was just born) and please share with officers and detectives who were involved in the case.
Thank you,
Chief Varrone
Katie responded in her simple positive way:
Thank you for sharing the pictures! I feel it is important to know that, after everything that I have gone through, I have gone on to lead a “normal” life, which is a big part of the reason for the book—so that it can give people hope that they too can go on to lead productive lives!
Speak to you soon,
Katie
Another note fell into my hands upon the twentieth anniversary of Katie’s abduction. It came from a voice now silenced. James Catterson, the DA, passed away in 2007 after a stroke. A year earlier, he had sent this response to a news reporter inquiring, “What ever happened to Katie Beers?”
My contacts with Katie are nil, mainly because I avoided staying in touch with her for a most compelling reason. I feel strongly that she was off on a new life and any contact with the past made her very uneasy. It was best for her to put that part of her childhood as far away as possible, even though it meant severing ties with her champions as well as her demons. The last time I saw her was at high school graduation, a fine young woman who deserved a clean slate away from whisper, raised eyebrows and furtive knowing looks of recognition from total strangers. She’s graduated
from college now and living (I believe) and working outside the Northeast, so be it! I’m still curious as to how she’s doing but I’m more concerned about dredging up bad memories for her. I confine myself to my own grandchildren and truly wish that my other “daughter” grows as strong, happy and safe as they. Thanks for thinking of Katie. She is a compelling and courageous person who desperately needs to escape a past that was thrust upon her by dysfunctional caregivers who let her down. You and I don’t need to be added to that long list.
All the best,
Jim Catterson
A dust covered brown box came out from beneath the green leather couch in Mary’s office.
“This is my Katie Beers box,” Mary offered a bittersweet grin.
It contained hundreds of handwritten letters from well-wishers, many of them school children, who in the days and months after Katie’s rescue, discussed in classrooms and assemblies the dangers of abduction and child abuse. The headlines were unavoidable, and Katie’s fate was a closely-followed drama and teachable moment. Letters arrived in bundles, in crayon, marker, pencil and ink. They were created on construction paper, lined loose-leaf and stationery. Some were illustrated and others typed.
“They are beautiful in different ways,” Mary said.
She and Katie had read many of them together, very slowly, a few at each session. Katie saved some for herself, including those from children requesting to be her best friend and from adults who were abused as children offering support. Mary believes they are a compelling testament to the outpouring of community love that functioned as an essential ingredient in propelling Katie Beers into recovery.
Dear Katie,
Welcome to a new beginning! Here is my message of hope to you: That you have the birthday party you have been waiting for. You will have nice clothes, dolls, and a lot of friends. I hope you will have a lot of love and stay with the family that has made the new beginning for you.
Kerri, 6
th
Grade
Dear Katie,
I’m so glad that you survived. And I hope you and your family live happily ever after.
Gina, Grade 5
BURIED MEMORIES
Dear Katie,
I’m extremely sorry that help didn’t get to you sooner. We should all be thankful that you got out of that horrible place alive. Be happy and fight what you don’t like about life.
Stacey, Grade 5
Dear Katie,
You are safe now. You have your whole life to catch up on things. Your New Friend, Julie
Dear Katie,
I heard about what happened to you. I felt very bad. I hoped and prayed every night and day for you. Katie, I feel like I have known you all my life.
Sincerely, George
Dear Katie,
I hope you find a family that shows you loving care. Don’t worry about the past. Look forward to life.
Yours sincerely, Marlon, 5
th
Grade
Dear Katie,
I’m so glad you’re ok. I prayed for you every night. You’re a very strong and very lucky little girl. You’re probably scared and confused but now finally you’ll be cared for. Your mom will always be your mom but there is more to being a mom than giving birth. It’s time you have a real mom to show you love and take care of you. I hope to hear good things.
Love, Laraine.
Dear Katie,
I am very happy that you are alive. Everybody loves you. You are a very special girl.
Love, Jovanka
1
Arthur Herzog,
17 Days: The Katie Beers Story
(New York: Harper Collins: 1993).
2
“Police Query 2 in Search for Girl,10,”
New York Times
, December 31, 1992
3
Herzog,
17 Days.
4
Paul Vitello, “Sidney R. Siben Publicity Hound,”
Newsday
, May 12, 2001.
5
“Fearing for Katie As Search for Missing Girl continues, Abuse Charges Surface,”
Newsday,
December 31, 1992.
6
“Katie’s Case County Probed her Treatment,”
Newsday
, January 6, 1993.
7
Herzog,
17 Days
.
8
“Going Nowhere with no Big Leads”,
Newsday
, January 5, 1993.
9
Jonathan Rabinowitz ,
New York Times
, January 9, 1993.
10
Paul Vitello, “A Tangled Young Life,”
Newsday
, January 5, 1993.
11
Joe Treen and Maria Eftimiades , New York: St. Martens Press,
My Name is Katherine: The True Story of Katie Beers, the Little Girl Who Survived an Underground Dungeon of Horror
, p.182.
12
“A Day of Tension ,”
Newsday
, January 14, 1993.
13
Paul Vitello, “Sidney R. Siben, Publicity Hound
,” Newsday,
May 12,2001.
14
“Katie Freed after 16 Days,
Newsday,
January 14, 1993.
15
Herzog,
17 Days
.
16
“Katie Freed from Bunker,”
Newsday
, January 14, 1993.
17
“Waiting was Agony for Katie’s Kin,”
Newsday
, January 14, 1993.
18
“Let Katie Breathe,”
New York Post
, January 21, 1993.
19
Editorial,
East Hampton Star
, January 28, 1993.
20
“Joy and Relief over Child’s Rescue,”
Newsday,
January 14, 1993.
21
“Disgusting Marilyn Beers is a Mother Alright,”
New York Post
, January 22, 1993.
22
Herzog, 17 Days.
23
“Disgusting Marilyn Beers is a Mother Alright,”
New York Post
, January 22, 1993.
24
“Beers’ Makeover ,”
Newsday,
February 5, 1993.
25
“Katie Beers likes New Home,”
New York Times,
January 21, 1993.
26
“Weighting Katie’s wishes vs Public
,” Newsday
, April 9, 1993.
27
“Always on Sunday,”
New York Post,
June 29, 1994.
28
“Eternal Child,”
Newsday
, February 14, 1993.
29
Minutes of Parole Board Hearing, Division of Parole, State of New York, April 28, 1998.
30
Minutes of Parole Board Hearing, Division of Parole, State of New York, August 7, 2002.
31
Minutes of Parole Board Hearing, Division of Parole, New York State, May 26, 2004 and June 6, 2006.
32
“Police Team was Ready,”
Newsday
December 31, 1992.
33
Mike McAlary, “Little Katie Beers gets Chance to be Just a Kid,
New York Daily News
, April 25, 1994.
34
Dave Cullen,
Columbine
, New York: Twelve (2003).
35
Dr. Judith Herman,
Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence—from Domestic Abuse to Political Terror
, New York: Basic Books (1997).
36
Jim B. Green ,
Colleen Stan:The Simple Gifts of Life
, Bloomington: iUniverse (2007).
37
Herman,
Trauma and Recovery.
38
Victim’s Impact Statement, Division of Parole, State of New York, October 5, 2007.
39
Victim’s Impact Statement, October 5, 2007.
40
Transcript, Division of Parole, State of New York, November 14, 2007.
41
Transcript, Division of Parole, State of New York, September 20, 2011.
42
Herman,
Trauma and Recovery.
Carolyn Gusoff is an Emmy award winning broadcast journalist who has covered the Long Island beat since 1987. She is currently seen on air at WCBS-TV in New York. As a reporter for WCBS, Fox5 New York, WNBC and News 12, Carolyn has covered some of the most high profile news stories in New York City and its suburbs, including the kidnapping of Katie Beers. Carolyn has a Master’s Degree in Journalism from Columbia University and a Bachelor’s Degree in English and Government from Cornell University. She lives with her husband and their two children on Long Island.