Knowing Is Not Enough (8 page)

“No, no, no, nothing like that let me explain. We went
on a few dates. The last night I saw him he came back to my place. We hooked up. In the morning he had to leave early. We were supposed to get back together later that day. Then—” she paused and threw up her hands.

I cut in. “Then what?”

Tobey put her hands down. “Then nothing—I never heard from him or saw him—well, until now.”

There was a line for the stalls, but we sat in the chairs in the anteroom.

“Wait a minute,” I objected. “Tobey, I don’t remember you ever telling me this. How long has it been since you saw him?”

“Two years!”

“Oh, my God, are you kidding me?”

“No, I’m not kidding!” She yelled.

I wasn’t quite sure what all this meant. “Okay, so . . . you need to lower your voice . . . and, it’s not like you’ve exactly been losing sleep over this man. You mean to tell me you didn’t hear from him at all in a couple of years?”

“He called me one time, but I didn’t answer. I was too pissed off.”

I shook my head and pulled out a compact to check my lipstick. “You should’ve answered, Tobey, at least to find out what happened.”

“I was so mad at him at the time—I couldn’t think of anything left to say.”

I said, “He could have explained what happened and apologized.” I glanced at her. She looked miserable. “Okay, what do you want to do? Are you upset? You want to leave?”

She shook her head, but didn’t say anything.

“Okay, tell me this—do you still have feelings for this guy?” I asked.

She shrugged. “Let’s just say I was disappointed. I didn’t expect to bump into him.”

I rubbed her arm. “I don’t think he remembers the situation the same as you, or he wouldn’t be talking to you let alone at our table. He may be trying to make amends.”

A stall opened up, and I left Tobey and went in. When I returned, Tobey looked a little better. She checked herself out in the mirror.
A good sign she’s feeling better
. I washed my hands and applied some lotion from my purse. “Are you okay to head back out?”

By the time we got back to the table only Karen and Linda were there. We sat down, I gave Linda a look, and she raised her eyebrows in a mute question. I mouthed I’d tell her later. It looked like another round of drinks on the table, probably compliments of Peter. While Tobey and Karen talked, I leaned over and whispered in Linda’s ear. “Where did Peter go?”

“Oh, he said he would be right back. I don’t know where he went, though.”

“Oh, okay. Did you know anything him and Tobey?”

Linda looked just as confused as me. “I don’t know what you talking about.”

“I’ll tell you later. It’s too long to talk about here,” I said.

Linda asked, “Is Tobey interested in him? He’s cute. I actually thought he might be good for you.”

I shrugged and sipped my wine. “No, no, no—Tobey used to date him.”

Linda put down her drink. “I don’t remember ever seeing him. When’s the last time she saw him?”

“I think she said about two years ago.”

Linda’s eyes widened. “Two years? Well, what does she want?”

I said, “I don’t even think Tobey can answer that question.”

From the corner of my eye, I saw Peter walking back to the table, and when he got there he asked Tobey to dance. She got up immediately, and Linda and I resumed our conversation. “Tobey should talk to him—you never know, he could be her Prince Charming. Speaking of which, did anybody here catch your eye?”

“Nah—but, it’s nice to be out.”

“You think you’ll come here again?”

“Yeah, I think I will. I used to really like this place.”

“I think it’s nice,” she said, “but you need to do other stuff, too.”

“I will. I actually thought about going to this poetry reading I overheard some ladies talking about in the bathroom.” Well, why not? It would be something different, at least.

Linda grinned. “Oh, that sounds like fun. Let me know. If you want, Mitch and I can go with you.”

“Thank you! I’d love that.” It really was sounding like fun now.

“Okay, but you have to let me know so I can drop the kids at Mama and Daddy’s.”

“I will,” I promised.

The night wound down and it appeared Tobey and Peter was getting along. I’d hoped to find my own happy ending, or at least get close to it, but that wasn’t going to happen–too much to expect from one night out. Linda
and Karen left soon after Tobey returned from the dance floor. Being happily married means you get bored in these places real quick.

I get bored too, but it’s a different kind of bored. The kind of I’m-bored-here-but-let’s-move-on-to-the-next-place.
Their
bored is let’s-go-home-and-get-into-my-pajamas-and-see-what’s-on-TV. I sat alone and finished nursing my drink. Time to go.

I looked over at Tobey. “Hey, girl, I think I’m going take off. You okay here by yourself?”

“She’ll be okay,” Peter answered. “I’ll make sure she gets to her car.”

“Aw, such a gentleman.”

Tobey looked like she shouldn’t have had that last drink. “Alex, I think I am going to head to the ladies room.”

“All right, go ahead,” I said. “I’ll keep Peter company until you get back.”

Tobey stood up, patted my hand and smiled. Oh, yeah, she’d had more than a few. “I think Tobey may need you to take her home,” I said to Peter.

“She’s still pretty upset with me, so I don’t think that’s going to happen,” he said.

“She seemed like she was warming up.”

He shrugged. “I have more explaining to do.”

“Well, keep talking to her—she’ll get there,” I said.

He turned to look at me. “So what about you, Alex—married? Single?”

I frowned. Disappointed in my own status. “I’m newly single.”

“I take it that’s not a good thing,” he chuckled.

My turn to shrug. “It’s an okay thing.”

“When’s the last time you went out?”

I looked in the air, as though the answer were there. “Ah, since I got a divorce?” I raised my pointing finger. “One time.”

“One time before tonight?”

“No,” I laughed. “Tonight is the one time.”

Tobey walked to the table and sat down next to me. I knew she was dying to know what we’d talked about . . . just as much as I wanted to know what they’d talked about earlier. Either way, it would have to wait. I wanted to get out of there.

Despite Tobey’s return, Peter continued asking me questions. “Are you ready to meet someone?”

“Ahhh—”

Tobey answered for me. “Yes, she’s ready!”

“Wait a minute,” I said. Tobey and Peter stared patiently waiting for whatever else I had to add to the discussion. “Okay, you’re right, I’m ready. It just seems a little—”

“A little what?”

I exhaled, “I don’t what I’m talking about—yes, when the time comes and I meet someone, I’m ready to start dating again.”

Peter said, “Well how about I hook you up with one of my boys?”

“What? No—no—”

Tobey straightened up in her chair. “What do you mean, no! Yes, Alex.”

I shook my head. “No, I don’t want to be fixed up.”

Tobey asked, “Why not? This is perfect.”

Peter looked on as we discussed the matter back and
forth. “Let me know if you change your mind,” he said. “He’s a nice guy. I think you would like him.” And with that, he decided to call it a night. He paid his tab, said many goodbyes to Tobey with a promise to call, and left. I figured that was officially our cue. “Tobey, come on. Leave your car here, I’ll take you home and we’ll come pick it up in the morning.”

“Oh, Alex, I’m fine.”

“You’re far from fine, and I’m not risking you going to jail. You’ll get pulled over for DUI and with your temper—no, me taking you home is better than bailing you out of jail.”

On the way home, Tobey nodded off. I couldn’t help thinking about Peter’s invitation for me to meet his friend. Perhaps I spoke to soon. It would be nice to meet someone.

“Tobey? What were you and Peter talking about?” I asked.

“What?”

“You and Peter, did he tell you what happened? Did he want to keep seeing you?”

“Huh.” Tobey didn’t bother opening her eyes. “Yeah he told me, but I don’t know, Alex. He said he wasn’t ready for a relationship back then—got scared—blah, blah, blah.”

“You don’t believe him.”

“No, not really.”

We both laughed. I continued drive us. Listening to music blaring inside the club for hours made me appreciate the silence. We were almost at Tobey’s house when she asked, “Have you thought anymore about what I said?”

“You’ll have to be more specific than that.”

“Sanford. Have you given any more thought about contacting Sanford?”

“No, I haven’t.” Tobey shifted in her seat. “Wait a minute, let me finish—but I will call him.”

We made it to her house. Tobey unlatched her seat belt and turned toward me. “I’m glad, Alex. It really is time to move forward with everything.”

After a moment of silence I said, “Thank you.”

“Thank you for what?”

“Keeping me straight, girl—keeping me straight.”

Of all things I could do on a Saturday, providing cab service to Tobey didn’t make my list. I needed gas, so I called ahead from the station. After five rings a slurred voice mumbled something unintelligible. I wanted to turn around and go home, but I’d come this far. “Are you up?” I asked.

“Yeah, I’m up, just a little hung over.”

“Okay. I’m around the corner, so make sure you’re looking out for me, because I don’t want to come up.”

“Why not?”

“It’s just I want to get some stuff done today. Okay, so come down, I’m here.”

“All right Alex, I’m on my way.” Tobey surprised me, she came down right away. Once she settled into the car I started to talk about our night out. “So did you have fun?”

Tobey nodded. “I did. It was good to see Peter and clear everything up.” She gazed out the car window. “Yeah, but he didn’t remember it the way I did. Go figure, most men don’t remember things the way we remember
them.”

“The truth isn’t a male or female thing, it’s just the truth,” I pointed out.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” She didn’t appear to be interested in a philosophical discussion about truth and lying. “Anyway, he wants to be friends, and that’s all we can be.”

I stopped for a red light. “As long as you’re okay with being his friend, then friends it is.”

“I don’t think I have a choice in the matter.”

“Actually, you do have a choice. You could choose not to be his friend.”

“Oh, yeah,” she said with a laugh. “I didn’t think about what was behind door number two.”

“See, that’s what you have me for. There’s always a door number two. The good news is you don’t have to decide this today. Since he’s no longer on the menu, it really doesn’t matter.”

“You’re right about that one, too.”

The downtown skyline came into view. We exited the freeway onto the service drive headed toward The Boulevard. “Hey did you park in the lot or in the garage?”

“Oh, in the garage on the seventh floor. They’d have towed my car if I’d parked in the lot.” I pulled into the garage and went up to her floor. Tobey pointed. “There’s my car.” She grabbed her purse, opened the car door and stepped out waving her hand. “Thanks for the ride.”

She started her car and drove toward the exit. I followed her out of the garage when my phone rang. It was Tobey. “Hey, are you taking the freeway home?”

“Yeah, I’m going to head to the gym, then go home,
but you know, I wanted to talk to you about Peter’s friend. Do you think I should meet him?”

“Yeah, isn’t that what I said? What can it hurt?”

I shook my head, even though she couldn’t see me. “I think I want to try and meet someone on my own first.”

“Either way, it won’t hurt to meet him too.”

I heard horns blowing through the phone. “Tobey, is that you blowing your horn like crazy?”

“Yeah, I hate driving on the freeway. They treat the lanes like they’re suggestions.” Tobey started yelling at the other drivers.

“You do realize they can’t hear you,” I pointed out.

“Yeah, I know. Now, what were you saying—oh, check that guy out.”

“Do you think Peter’s on the up and up?”

“I don’t know, Alex.” She laughed. “I haven’t talked to that man in over two years, how the hell should I know? Nothing to do but to meet him.”

“That’s true. I’m going to a poetry reading next week and I don’t want to feel like I’m rushing this—I’ll hold off meeting Peter’s friend.”

“No holding off I’m setting it up. Have you called Sanford?”

I reached a decision. “After my workout I think I’m going to call.”

“That’s good,” Tobey said. “Let me know how it turns out.”

The short drive to the gym helped clear my head. I didn’t like uncertainty and the unknown. Sanford sat firmly in both columns. It’s like reading the last page of a book. I wanted to know everything would eventually turn out all right.

I arrived at the gym ahead of the Saturday morning crowd. The idea of seeing Sanford made me nostalgic. Doe Eyes from my favorite movie soundtrack blasted in my headphones. I ran to the symphonic rhythm of the violins and soft pedal of the piano.