Lady Catherine's Secret: A Secrets and Seduction book (46 page)

Catherine tightened her grip on his hand. “You were only a child. I’m sure you only did what you had to do." But the words sounded like false platitudes to her. "I have faith in you," she added. "Can you tell me what happened?”

He remained silent, but Catherine waited. “Everyone knew my father was a recluse,” he finally said. “He never went anywhere, and he rarely spoke to anyone. Twice a year his lawyer would come to have him sign papers. Aside from that, he saw no one from outside the estate. I was told that after my mother’s death he had visitors for a year or two, at first to offer condolences and later to try to pull him from his despair, but he drove them all away. One by one, they gave up on him. Over time, stories about him grew and became embellished. The local villagers would talk of his madness and the ghosts that wandered the halls. The most dangerous rumor, however, was that he had gold and jewels hidden away. Some said it was in his bedroom, and others said it was in my mother’s crypt.” His lips pressed into a thin line. “The burial chamber was broken into, but the groundskeeper chased them away before any real damage was done.

“The last time our butler, Thomas Latimer, retrieved me after I’d run away to Edinburgh, I was furious with my father. He instructed the servants that I had to remain on the grounds of the estate. They wouldn’t even let me visit the village because Latimer thought I’d run away again.” He gave a grim laugh. “They were right, by the way. I dreamed of escaping that place. I took to prowling the main house, investigating rooms that had been closed for years. I eventually found my mother’s rooms in a wing of the house we no longer used. I’d spent so many years trying to avoid her chambers that I’d never bothered to investigate there before.”

A look of sadness crossed his face, and Catherine squeezed his hand. He smiled and tightened his grip as well.

“As I went through her things, I was surprised to find some of her jewels sitting on her dresser as though she’d only just removed them and hadn’t yet put them away. Her rooms seemed filled with her presence, as though she’d just stepped out and would be back at any moment. I began visiting the room daily, staying for hours at a time. I found her books and letters and pored through them, trying to learn something of the mother I’d never known.

“One evening when I went to her rooms, I saw a light coming from under her door. I’m not sure why, but I was convinced that my father was in there. I was certain that he must have wanted the same connection with my mother that I’d been forging and that he’d come there to try to recapture it. I burst into the room, eager to talk to him, only to find a strange man in there, rifling through my mother’s things, defiling her room. He’d torn everything apart in his search, and her jewels were no longer on her dressing table.

“I must have made a sound, because he whirled on me, dropping her silver comb and hairbrush into a bag he had sitting near him on the floor, and pulled out a knife. I tried to back out of the door, but he was too fast and was upon me before I could escape.” He paused, dragging his hand down his face as if trying to clear the image from his eyes. “He held his arm around my neck with his knife at my throat, demanding to know where the rest of her jewels were hidden. He said if I didn’t tell him, he’d slit my throat and throw my body in the river. He said everyone would assume I’d run away again, and he’d get away with it. They’d even think I’d torn apart my mother’s rooms. I knew he was right. Something snapped in me. I became furious. All I could think was that I wanted him dead.

“I used exactly the same move I taught you. When I pushed the knife into his chest, it went in deep. He died almost instantly.” Daniel abruptly stopped talking and remained silent.

Catherine squeezed his hand. “It was self-defense. You weren’t to blame.”

He shook his head. “I try to tell myself that, but I felt the bloodlust, I wanted him dead, and I’m still responsible for that what I did.” The silence stretched between them.

“What happened next?” she finally asked. “You were just a boy.”

“I knew the problem was too big for me to handle on my own. I needed help, so I found Latimer, the one person in my life who could solve any problem. And he did. I don’t know what happened to the body, and Latimer said to forget about what had happened. But how could I forget what I’d done?

“Father shipped me off to Eton soon afterward. I think it must have been Latimer’s idea. I’m not sure how he managed that part, but he did, and I’ll be grateful to him for the rest of my life.”

She looked into his eyes, seeing how tortured he felt. “You need to forgive yourself.”

“It’s hard to forgive a murder.”

“Not murder, self-defense,” she insisted. “Just like today. I can’t bring myself to regret any of our actions today. Stansbury and Attwood put their plan into effect to separate us so that they could hurt us. We were only trying to protect ourselves.”

“When I saw that knife at your throat, I was terrified at the thought of losing you." Daniel gently cupped her cheek in his palm as he gazed into her eyes. "I only just found you.”

“And I defended myself exactly the same way you did," she said, placing her hand over his. His anguished and vulnerable expression made her ache to pull him close. "Do you hold me responsible for Attwood’s current state?”

“Of course not," he said, dropping his hand from her cheek.

“Then how could you hold a twelve-year-old boy responsible?”

He looked startled by the question “When I remember what happened that night, I seem to forget that I was just a boy.”

“You were a boy who hadn’t been cared for— a boy who, despite his childhood, grew to become a responsible and caring man.”

He turned his face away from her. “Is that how you see me?”

“Of course.”

He looked back at her, searching her face for the truth. He must have found it, because he reached out and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer. “What did I do to deserve someone as perfect as you?”

Her brows furrowed. “I’m anything but perfect. I’m impetuous, remember? And reckless, and terribly improper.”

“And I love every improper inch of you.”

“What?”

“I love you. I finally admitted to myself how much you mean to me when I thought I might lose you.”

She threw her arms around him. “I love you, too. I was terrified when I thought Stansbury had kidnapped you. I kept imagining the worst.”

He held her face in his hands and kissed her. “I haven’t kissed Gray since that night in my drawing room.” He traced his thumb down her scar. “It’s a bit disconcerting.”

Someone knocked at the carriage door, and they jumped apart.

“It’s me,” Charles called out. “The inspector is here.”

Daniel pushed the door open. “We’ll be right there.”

“He says he has a couple of questions, and then we can all go,” Charles said, turning away.

Daniel looked at her, his blue eyes smoldering with a promise that sent a bolt of passion searing to her core. “Let’s finish this up so I can take you home. Because when we get there, I want to show you exactly how much I cherish you.”

58 - Huntley Academy

One year later

“You need to stand more like a man,” Catherine said, pushing a toe between Lady Bennett’s feet and nudging them apart. “If your feet are a little farther apart, it will provide better balance for you.”

“Catherine,” a soft voice called.

Catherine spun around.

Sarah stood at the entrance to the ladies’ portion of the fencing salon, clutching her reticule nervously. “I’ve come for my first lesson.”

Catherine smiled broadly at her little sister. “And I’m so glad you’re here. Come with me to the dressing room. I’ll help you change.”

Catherine wrapped her arm companionably around Sarah’s waist and escorted her into the pretty little blue room with its row of curtained stalls. Sarah kept eyeing Catherine’s fencing costume, looking both excited and nervous about the prospect of wearing one.

A lady’s maid waited there, ready to help women in and out of their corsets and dresses, but Catherine simply nodded to her and began to undo the row of buttons running down the back of Sarah's dress.

“I hope you’ll grow to love fencing as much as I do. But if nothing else, you’ll learn something about defending yourself. You never know when you might need to use it.”

“I hope never to be in the same position you were in a year ago. I would have been petrified.”

“I hope you never are either,” Catherine said, pulling the dress over Sarah’s head. “I could go an entire lifetime without ever having a similar experience and be quite content.”

“I never understood why Stansbury and Attwood joined together. What did they hope to accomplish?” Sarah glanced in the mirror and watched as her sister loosened the strings at the back of her corset.

“It’s all speculation, since Stansbury died, but I think he enlisted Attwood’s help to get revenge against Daniel. He seemed to believe he had a prior claim to me.”

“But why such a convoluted plan?” Sarah asked as she undid the hooks at the front of her corset. “Why not just kill Huntley? Slit his throat and be done with it.”

For a moment, Catherine felt a roll of nausea and swallowed. “Stansbury wanted more than that. He wanted to humiliate Daniel.” She tugged at the bows holding Sarah’s petticoats closed. “He planned to have Daniel watch as he...” She couldn’t force herself to speak of his plans to defile her, and instead pressed her lips together. “According to Attwood, they planned to fund their escape with the money they expected to win from fixing the tournament. Hampstead took first place with twenty-to-one odds. With the four of us out of the tournament, he was the strongest fencer remaining.” The petticoats tumbled to Sarah’s feet in a white cloud.

“But that doesn’t make sense,” she said, stepping out of them. “Stansbury would ruin himself in the process.”

“He was already ruined.” Catherine handed Sarah a pair of leggings to wear. Sarah looked at them doubtfully but then gave a shrug and began pulling them on over her pantalets. “Word of his underhanded business dealings had spread, and the police were searching for him. He blamed everything on Daniel. When he had me trapped in that warehouse, he was ranting about Daniel’s Midas touch, but I don’t know why.”

“He sounds mad.”

“Tuck your shift in to the leggings,” she instructed. “Yes, I think he must have been. He said some hideous things. Things I wish I’d never heard. I was truly frightened. I’m thankful Daniel arrived when he did.”

Sarah fastened the fencing jacket over her shift and was ready.

“And Attwood went to prison?”

Catherine nodded. “I was fortunate that he didn’t contradict Daniel’s version of the story. Even though I stabbed Attwood, he said that Daniel had done it. I think he was too humiliated at being brought down by a mere woman.” Catherine half smiled. “He died there just two months ago from a lung infection. Calliope’s a respectable young widow now, with her dowry intact.”

They returned to the fencing salon. The traveling trophy she’d won at Bernini’s annual tournament just one short month ago stood in a place of honor on the mantel. Hampstead’s name was engraved on it first, with hers directly beneath it. Or rather, Alexander Gray’s name. It made no difference since they were one and the same. Finally, the threads of her life had merged.

Sarah looked around, taking in the lady fencers with a bemused expression on her face. “I’d never have guessed so many women would come. You’ve done well.”

“And it remains a secret. It works out beautifully. Our Ladies’ Aid Society is a perfect cover, plus we can contribute food and supplies to women who are in desperate situations. We have a reason for meeting frequently, and it keeps away the narrow-minded and traditional members of society.”

“That’s brilliant. How did you think of it?”

“I owe the idea to Diana,” she said, nodding toward the tall slim woman with the straight black hair. “She’s my first fencing instructor. She’s led an interesting life. In fact, you’ll start your lessons with her today. She’s quite good.”

Sarah’s face fell. “Diana? But what about you? I thought you’d teach me to fence.”

Catherine shrugged. “I can’t. I promised Daniel I wouldn’t.”

“What?” Sarah’s eyes flashed with indignation. “But why would you make such a ridiculous promise?”

Catherine couldn’t stifle her grin. “Because you’re going to be an aunt; nothing is more important than keeping my baby safe.”

Sarah’s mouth dropped open. “Catherine, that’s marvelous,” she said, crushing Catherine to her chest.

Life really was quite marvelous.

Thank you for reading
Lady Catherine’s Secret
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Secrets and Seduction
series

Book 1:
It Takes a Spy...
(Celeste and Devin’s story)
here
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