Lady Fiasco, A Traditional Regency Romance (My Notorious Aunt) (20 page)

“You leave me little choice.”

“No, I didn’t, did I? Be warned, Wesmont. I never make idle threats. Call for Fiona early Saturday morning. Take her riding. When you return, give me your decision. Oh, and bring a spirited mount. I have it on good authority Fiona enjoys—”

A loud bang followed by a whizzing sound splintered the air. Honore screamed and her hands flew to her head. “I’ve been shot. My head! I’ve been shot!”

She blanched. The music screeched to a halt and the guests on the dance floor gaped at her.

Tyrell grasped her arm to support her. “Are you hurt?”

“I don’t know.” Honore felt her head in various places just to make sure. “I’m not bleeding. I think it went through my hair.”

Tyrell frowned. There was a burn mark and a small gap. It did look as if something had flown through her odd coiffure. He grabbed a candle from a wall sconce and used it to illuminate the paneling behind where they’d been standing. He ran his fingers along the wood until he found a small dark ball embedded in the wall. He looked across the room, and surmised the shot must’ve been fired from that empty doorway. Dashing across the ballroom, he found the gallery crammed with guests all laughing and bantering with a magician who challenged the audience to guess which box held his rabbit.

Tyrell returned to Honore and shook his head. She waved at the musicians ordering them to resume playing.

“I’m sorry, my lady. It is impossible to tell who fired the shot. Perhaps, someone was carrying a pistol and it misfired. Just this evening the Duke of Cumberland showed me a firearm concealed under his coat. Such a thing is not impossible.”

“I suppose not. Some ladies carry a small revolver in their reticule for protection. I do. If the lady’s bag were dropped, the weapon might accidentally discharge.” She shrugged.

“Perhaps.” But Tyrell guessed Lady Alameda had more enemies than just him.

Chapter 16
Decisions

“E
xcellent
c
laret, this.” Robert Anbel lounged in a leather chair across from Tyrell.

Tyrell swirled the ruby liquid in his glass. “Yes. Well
,
the least I could do was bring a bottle, since I planned to consume most of it myself.”

They were ensconced in Robert’s comfortable rooms, surrounded by piles of books, outdated copies of
The Scourge
and various other newspapers were strewn across the floor and tables
.
Two mismatched hounds lay snoring on the hearth
.

“Ungodly mess you have here, Anbel
.
”

“I know
.
Wonderful, isn’t it. I’d shoot my man if he were to touch a thing. So, of course, the sensible chap leaves it alone
.
”

That almost won a chuckle out of his surly visitor
.

“Stop brooding, Ty
.
Lady Alameda’s household can
’
t be as bad as you say it is.”

“Oh, can’t it?” Tyrell glared at him. “It
’
s bedlam, pure and simple. No, I’m wrong. It certainly isn’t
pure,
and it isn’t
simple
either. It’s depraved and chaotic, certainly not a fit home for a young lady. The countess lacks any moral character whatsoever. Then there is her salacious stepson. Madness. Did I tell you she invited Cumberland to her
soirée
?”

“Yes. You mentioned the duke, two or three times.”

“Well, I ask you
,
what kind of woman allows that vile old lecher in to a gathering where her own niece will be in attendance? Not to mention letting loose Byron’s would-be-cronies
.
”

Tyrell slammed his empty glass down on the end table
.
“The lady had the audacity to ring a peal over my head about
my
behavior. Oh, and what an interesting peal it was. I cannot fathom her offering me
carte blanche
with Fiona.
Make up your mind
,
the insane countess commands. But under no circumstances am I to continue confusing the chit
.
Take her to bed
,
says she, or court her properly and marry her
.
”

Robert choked and nearly sputtered his claret
.
“Good heavens, man! You didn’t mention
that
before.” He regained his composure and mopped up his spilled wine
.
“Knowing your strong predisposition against marriage, as I do. I wonder what will your decision be? Have you decided to ruin the lovely Lady Fiasco, or have done with her?”

Tyrell cast him a murderous frown
.
“Don’t be an ass. I plan to get her away from that asylum she’s living in
.
”

Robert ignored Tyrell’s thunderous expression and smirked. “Ah, I see. And how will you accomplish this feat?”

“I don’t know
.
I had planned to write a letter to her father, but the mad countess only gave me two days before she lets Marcus have a go at Fiona if I don’t come up to
s
nuff. The post will never get back and forth from Spain in so short a time
.
”

“
Alameda
?
Good God. The woman
is
deranged.”

“
It gets worse
.
This morning, I was astonished to receive an invitation from Lady Hawthorn, Fiona’s stepmother. She’s giving a ball for her daughter, Emeline. So
,
obviously they’re in town
.”

“Then what could be simpler? You need only remove the chit f
r
om the madwoman and place her in the bosom of her family.”

“That’s the rub. Fiona doesn’t know they’re here
.
When I told her she ought not be under the same roof with Alameda, she
c
laimed she had nowhere else to go
,
just as if
she had no notion they here in London. Further to the point, she didn’t mention the Hawthorn ball
.
”

“Surely, she’s had an invitation to her own family’s ball. It would be socially damning to not invite their own daughter.”

“Exactly.” Tyrell lifted the crystal decanter and poured more liquid into his glass. “Think how Fiona will feel when she finds out
.
”

“Rubbish
.
They wouldn
’
t intentionally exclude her. Just isn’t done
.
” Robert tapped the side of his cup
.
“
Unless she had a falling out with them. In that case, she might be prepared for the slight.
”

“
Slight
? It’s a back
-
handed slap in the face
.
”

“You’re jumping to conclusions, my rash friend.”

“We shall see. I’m taking her riding tomorrow morning.
I
intend to find out more about it then.
”

“
Riding, eh?” The corners of Robert’s mouth twitched in silent mirth, as he added, “Decided to pay court
,
did you?”

Tyrell frowned at him
.
“Don
’
t be daft
.
The countess ordered me to do it
.
”

“
So, naturally, you must obey.”

“No choice
.
”

“Hmm.”

* * *

While Tyrell and Robert lounged in Anbel’s cluttered apartments, Fiona and Maria stood in front of a Dr. Meredith’s town house, screwing up their courage to knock
.
Behind them, the maid
,
Lorraine, scuffed nervously at the sidewalk
,
obviously unhappy with her young mistress’s actions
.

Fiona took a deep breath, grasped the brass knocker
,
and rapped briskly. “Chin up, Maria. I have it on the best authority that this doctor knows the very latest medical techniques
.
He teaches at the university
.
There are rumors he might even receive a knighthood for his extraordinary service to wounded soldiers. I’m certain he can do something for you
.
”

“What if Mama finds out? She’ll murder me.”

Just then, a young maid opened the door. Fiona looped arms with Maria and used her haughtiest voice to say, “The Misses Hawthor–er”—she hadn’t thought of a false name. The smell of baking ham wafted to her nose
—
“Hawthornham, here to see Dr
.
Meredith
.
”

“Yes, miss.” The maid curtsied and showed them up the stairs.

Dr. Meredith was younger than Fiona had anticipated
,
and he was a tr
i
fle too handsome to fit his distinguished reputation. She sat beside Maria, in front of his cluttered ink
-
stained oak desk, while Lorraine hovered in the back of the room like a fretful specter
.

He smiled patiently. “It is customary, Miss Hawthornham, to send round for an appointment
.
You’re fortunate that I was not with another patient or at hospital
.”

She shifted uneasily in her chair. “My apologies, but we’ve come on a matter of the utmost importance, an emergency, of sorts
.
”

The doctor pinched his lips between his teeth
,
as if trying not to betray hidden amusement
.
Brushing an errant
l
ock of black hair away from his forehead
,
he cleared his throat
.
“What is the exact nature of your emergency?”

Maria and Fiona exchanged anxious looks. Fiona straightened her shoulders. “It’s my sister, sir. Something must be done for her mouth. She has some rotten teeth, a foul odor, and terribly sore gums.”

Dr. Meredith looked them both over carefully. “For sisters, you are not much alike
.
”

Fiona smiled confidently. She had anticipated this line of questioning.
“
Maria takes after our dear departed mother, and I am more like Father.” She drooped her head to the side and added in a mournful timbre
,
“More like Father
was.”

“Oh, I see. Both of your parents have passed on?”

Fiona nodded. “Yes. I, alone, must care for dear
little Maria
.
Please, doctor. I’ve heard from several of my friends that you are the best surgeon in
London
. Won’t you do something about her teeth? I’m prepared to pay you twice your normal fee
.
” She extracted a small stack of coins from her handbag and set it on the
corner
of his desk
.

He frowned. “Put your money away. You ought to have taken your sister to a dentist
.
”

“A tooth-puller? You don’t understand—it’s far more than a few a rotten teeth
.
Her gums are dreadfully sore
.
Indeed
,
her whole mouth is in a very painful state
.
A dentist simply isn’t knowledgeable enough for this job.”

He shrugged. “Very well. I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to look at the problem.” Then he added in a wry tone
,
“Have
dear
little
Maria come sit in this chair under my lamp.”

Maria dutifully trod over to his examining chair. Fiona thought her friend looked like a beautiful martyr walking courageously to her execution
.
She noted
Dr.
Meredith
’
s reaction. He flushed slightly and ran his finger nervously around his collar before stammering a reassurance to his patient
.
“There’s nothing to fear, miss
. If you will just open—
”

He flinched when pungent gases fluxed out. He stepped back shortly, cleared his throat, took a deep breath and bent over Maria with a metal instrument
,
not unlike a long thin spoon
.
He pushed and prodded
,
thoroughly examining her mouth, throat and cheeks.

“Good grief!” He exhaled and tossed the probe onto a steel tray. The clatter made Maria jump.

“What has been done to your mouth?” he demanded. “Your gums are hashed up like dog meat.”