Last Chance (44 page)

make sure you never saw me again. She whisked me to Louisiana as soon as

the doctors let her. I was never questioned again."

"But when all the charges were dropped against me...I can't

understand why no one told me you were alive."

"I don't know the answer to that. All Aunt Mavis told me was that

Damon had died in prison and that you had disappeared. I didn't know until I

started searching for you that you were even considered a suspect."

McKenna stared into space, remembering the day she walked out of

the jail a free woman--battered, ravaged, and so determined to get away

from everyone who reminded her of what had happened. She'd stopped at a

small market, and using some money the public defender had given her, she

purchased flowers for all three graves. She'd taken them to the cemetery,

said goodbye, and then she'd left.

Had anyone ever tried to find her, to tell her that her sister was still

alive? She would probably never know.

"You weren't responsible, Kenna. In fact, I blamed myself for a long

time."

Shocked, McKenna asked, "For what?"

"I told Mom and Dad about Damon. If I hadn't, I wonder how this

would have worked out. I think part of his problem was being told he

couldn't see you again."

Lucas was right. They were both taking on guilt that belonged to

Damon only.

"You're not responsible, Amy."

"And neither are you."

McKenna smiled. "Samara said we had a lot in common." The smile

vanished when she saw the yellow and brown bruises beneath her sister's

makeup. "I am sorry for what you went through, though."

Amy's mouth trembled as she shook her head. "I can't talk about it yet.

Okay?"

Understanding that better than just about anyone, McKenna

swallowed another lump and said, "Just know I'm here to talk if you need

to."

"Thanks. And, oh, would it be too weird to call me Jamie, not Amy?

I've kind of gotten used to the name over the years."

"Jamie's a lovely name. And it suits you."

"It was one of the few things Aunt Mavis let me have a say-so in."

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"What do you mean?"

Jamie's nose scrunched up into a grimace. "Remember how sour she

always was?" McKenna nodded.

"Remember Daddy's nickname for her?"

Ignoring the clutch to her heart at the mention of her father, McKenna

nodded again. "Aunt Pickle."

"And she never got any less sour, believe me. But when she

convinced me to change my name, I chose the name Jamie Kendrick."

Enlightenment dawned. Amy had used her entire family's name to

create her own. Their mother's name had been Jane and their father's name

had been Rick. The "Ken" came from her sister's nickname for McKenna,

"Kenna."

McKenna smiled at her sister's cleverness. "Did she ever figure it

out?"

Jamie shrugged. "She may have but she never said. You know Aunt

Mavis wasn't one to talk much anyway."

"I'm so sorry."

Jamie huffed out a sigh. "You have to stop apologizing. What Damon

did to our family was all him--not you. Okay?"

Awed and humbled by her sister's generosity and maturity, McKenna

nodded.

Shifting a bit to get more comfortable, Jamie gave her a mischievous

all-girl smile. "So, tell me all about Lucas Kane."

It was as if they'd never parted. McKenna found herself telling Jamie

about how she met Lucas and how wonderful he was. There were still things

to say, secrets to share, sorrows to overcome. That could wait till later. For

now, McKenna leaned back against her pillow, watched her sister's beautiful

face, and rejoiced in the fact that miracles really can happen.

Hours later, Lucas stepped back into McKenna's room. The sisters had

spent several hours together until the nurse came in and shooed Jamie back

to her room to rest. And from the looks of the sleeping McKenna, the visit

had exhausted her as well.

Lucas eased down into a chair beside the bed and watched her sleep.

He'd made some damn difficult decisions in his life, but he was about to

make the most difficult one of all. Was it the right one? Yes. That didn't

make it any easier.

"Lucas?"

"Didn't mean to wake you."

Her smile was one of warm, sleepy contentment. "I'm glad you're

here, but you look exhausted."

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"It's been a rough few days."

She scooted over in her bed and whispered, "Hold me."

Unable to resist temptation, Lucas slipped off his shoes and slid into

bed.

Wrapping his arms gently around her, he breathed in her fragrance.

The tension he'd been carrying for the last few days eased, though not

totally. He'd been damned terrified when she'd been shot and hadn't woken.

Now that he knew she would be all right, the relief was immense, but there

were still things to get through.

"Did you have a good visit with your sister?"

Her head rubbed against his chest as she nodded. "It was wonderful.

She's so bright and interesting...funny, too. And she's absolutely beautiful."

He smiled against her hair. "That's because she looks so much like

you."

"You're prejudiced."

He couldn't deny that. To him, there would never be a more beautiful

person inside or out than McKenna.

"The doctors said I can leave the hospital tomorrow."

Lucas stiffened. This was the perfect time to tell her, but dammit, not

yet.

"You need to take it easy for a few days."

She snuggled deeper into his arms. "I intend to."

Lucas swallowed hard as arousal surged. His body didn't care that she

wasn't up to making love; it only knew what it wanted. And from the first

time he'd met her until his death, he would want McKenna. That wasn't

something he could change.

Kissing the top of her head, he whispered, "Go to sleep."

"Night, Lucas...love you."

Lucas stared up at the white ceiling of the hospital room. There would

be no sleep tonight. Damned if he'd miss one moment of having McKenna in

his arms. Morning would come all too soon.

McKenna hurried through her shower. She'd woken alone this

morning, but with the knowledge that Lucas had stayed with her all night.

She'd woken several times to the comfort of his arms around her. Each time

she'd fallen back into a deep sleep, relishing an enormous sense of relief.

Last night she hadn't said anything, but she could tell something was

bothering him. He wasn't the easiest person to read, but she'd gotten pretty

good at it. Exhaustion could be one of his problems. Poor man looked as

though he hadn't slept in weeks.

Samara had brought her some clothes yesterday, so at least she had

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something to wear out of the hospital. Slipping into a pair of khaki pants and

a button-down pink cotton shirt, McKenna spent a few precious minutes

adding color to her cheeks. Though her eyes sparkled and she had a bit more

energy than she did yesterday, she still looked paler than she would have

liked.

She opened the door to find Lucas setting out a breakfast tray and

coffee for her.

"Good morning."

His perfect mouth moved up into a smile, but his eyes remained

solemn and serious. Something was definitely bothering him.

A good strong cup of coffee was needed before she asked any

questions. McKenna grabbed a cup, took a sip, decided it wasn't too hot, and

gulped it down.

As she returned the empty cup to the tray, she noticed Lucas's grin.

"What?"

"Were you thirsty?"

Laughing, she stood on her toes and pressed a kiss to his mouth. "No,

just needed some caffeine. Good morning again."

Instead of returning the kiss, he put his hands on her shoulders and

pushed her slightly away. "We need to talk."

"What's wrong?"

"I'm headed back to London today."

Her heart plummeted. A million questions and protests came to mind.

All she could manage was "I see."

"Do you, love?" As he held her hand between his, his expression was

as earnest as she'd ever seen it. "For the first time in years, you can finally

breathe easier. Finally have a life. You no longer have to look over your

shoulder to see if anyone is following you. You've lived in the shadows for

so long, without choices. You said yourself that you've been on a roller

coaster. Now you have an opportunity to get off that roller coaster and see

what life has to offer you."

"But you--"

"Don't look like that, McKenna. I'm doing this because I love you, not

because I don't."

Only able to concentrate on one thing, McKenna felt as if her heart

would explode. "But you said you don't leave."

Silver-gray eyes locked with hers. "You know where home is,

sweetheart. You've always known. Take some time to think. Do things

you've always wanted to do. Get to know your sister again. Get to know

yourself again." His mouth tender on hers, he softly repeated against her

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lips, "You know where home is, my love."

Speechless, unable to do anything for the mountains of tumultuous

emotions bubbling inside her, she watched as Lucas walked out the door.

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Twenty-eight

One month later

London

McKenna stood on the steps of Lucas's home. Her heart was pounding

so hard, she probably didn't even need to knock on the door for anyone to

hear her. Would he still want to see her after all this time?

The second after he'd walked out of the hospital room, she'd burst into

tears. A box of tissues later, she'd pulled herself together. And then she'd

finally thought about what he said...and she had understood. At least she

hoped she understood. Lucas had said she finally had choices, and he was

allowing her to choose. Something she hadn't been able to do in a very long

time.

The fact that he knew her so well boggled her mind and humbled her.

From the beginning, Lucas had been able to see through her tough-girl

persona. He knew the real McKenna, the one she hid from the rest of the

world. How could that make her feel anything but incredibly special?

The heady feeling of not having to look over her shoulder and hide

like a criminal was unlike anything she'd ever felt before. Freeing...and scary

as hell. That alone was an incredible rush. But in combination with the

miracle of her sister being alive, it had been almost more than she could

comprehend.

Samara and Noah had left the same day as Lucas. Noah's words as

he'd hugged her goodbye told her his thinking was in line with Lucas's. He'd

said, "Give yourself time to figure out what you want from life, McKenna.

You'll always have a place at LCR."

Noah's words had helped what Lucas had said sink in even deeper.

She had decisions, choices, options. McKenna began to feel like a kid who'd

been let loose in a toy store. She wanted to experience everything all at once.

Though a large part of her had wanted to rush after Lucas, she accepted that

she did need some time, not only for herself, but to spend with her sister.

She and Jamie had been released from the hospital on the same day.

They had gone to Paris the day after. Not only was it the city she'd spent the

most time in as an adult, McKenna had never had the chance to truly explore

like she'd always wanted. And since Jamie had never been to France, it

thrilled her to be able to explore the city with her sister at her side.

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They had played tourist together. Going to restaurants and museums

McKenna had always wanted to go to but couldn't. Every public, wellknown place she'd avoided before, she visited and savored the fact that she

could do so without fear.

Shadows of remembered pain still darkened Jamie's eyes, but

McKenna was amazed at her sister's strength. She was so determined to

overcome what had happened to her. She still couldn't talk about what

Damon had done to her or her experience in Spain, and as much as

McKenna wanted her to share with her, she refused to push her.

Until Lucas came along, McKenna hadn't been able to talk fully about

her own experiences with anyone. Jamie would come to that place in her

own time. She just wanted to make sure her sister knew she would help her

any way she could.

Not only had she and Jamie gorged themselves on Paris, they spent

hours upon hours getting to know each other again. When they were kids,

McKenna had never fully appreciated her little sister. Having lost her and

now found her again, she was determined to never take their relationship for

granted.

And she had done what Lucas wanted her to do. Think about her

choices. She had given a lot of thought about what she wanted out of life.

The answers were numerous and varied, but there had been only one

concrete absolute: she wanted to be with Lucas.

He had said she knew where home was, but that had been a month

ago. Was that still true?

Jamie had returned to the States with the promise to come to London

for a visit soon. She still had issues related to her ex-husband that she