Authors: Tl Alexander
Tags: #Literature & Fiction, #Romance, #Contemporary
Lester told me that Jaxson ate PB&J sandwiches exclusively between the ages of five and seven. No matter what they did, that’s all he ate.
Louis told me when Jaxson was ten, he put on his superman cape and jumped out of a tree and broke his right arm and his left leg.
Lane told me that Jaxson has always treated him like a little brother. And, like all sibs they’ve had a love-hate relationship. Jaxson taught him how to throw a curve ball, how to swim, and how to ride a bike. He also introduced him to alcohol, drugs and porn.
He took him to his first frat party, his first bar and his first trip to Vegas. And that is where he lost his virginity. So what happens in Vegas really does stay in Vegas.
At the end of my third week of house arrest, I receive my first visitor.
“Oh my God Girlfriend! I’ve fucking missed you so fucking much!” Jules screams as she jumps up and down in her four inch Louis. They look suspiciously like the once-deheeled pair.
“I’ve missed you too!” I scream back but forgo the jumping.
She gives me a big squeeze. “You’ve only been gone for three fuckin’ weeks but it feels like fucking forever. I’ve been so fucking worried about you.”
Man that’s a lot of f-age. I’ve turned Jules into a fucksayer.
She releases me, then steps back and takes me in. “Have you fuckin’ lost weight?”
“I don’t think so.”
“You’re getting plenty to eat?”
“Yes.”
She gives me a skeptical look. “They’re not withholding?”
“Withholding?”
“Food.”
“Of course not.”
“You don’t want to lose your lovely tatas.”
“Don’t worry, my tatas aren’t going anywhere.”
Jules peels off her coat and lays it on my bed. She then slowly looks around the room. “Nice digs,” she says with surprise.
“Yes. What where you expecting?”
“I don’t know. Not this.” Jules takes a stroll around the room paying particular attention to the baseboards.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m looking for a radiator.”
“No radiators Jules. But just down the hall is a locked room that wasn’t on the grand tour. Mary just skipped right past it, like it didn’t even exist. What could be behind that locked door? What do you think?” I taunt. “Maybe whips, chains, fuck benches, fuck tables, all sorts of kinky fuckery toys and torturous fuckery devises. Maybe even a radiator or two.”
“Ha, ha. Go ahead and mock me—make fun.” She sticks her tongue out at me. She does this a lot.
I sigh.
Jules sits in one of the floral print chairs and I join her in the other. There is a knock on the door and Lane pokes his head in.
“Are you both decent?”
“Not if I can help it, Dimple Boy.” Jules purrs.
He grins like a fool and walks in carrying a box and a bag.
“Where should I put these, Jules?”
She points. “Right here next to the fireplace.”
Lane puts them down.
“You came bearing gifts?”
“Of course.”
“What did you bring me?”
Lane smirks. “Some very interesting things.”
“You looked?” Jules huffs.
“Like you have to ask.”
“You’re a very bad boy.” Jules faux-scolds.
Lane walks back toward the door and his cell rings.
“Yo boss-man. No. Yes. I don’t think so. She is” he says, and winks at me. “Yes. Okay, copy that.” He puts his cell back in his pocket. “That was the boss-man. His plane is just leaving LA. He says he’ll see you tonight.”
Jules raises a brow. “See you tonight? Sounds like you won’t be needing my gifts.”
“And what would said gifts be?”
“A waterproof vibrating massage wand and a brand new state-of-the-art clitertator.”
“What the hell is a cliterator?” Lane asks.
“You don’t want to know,” I answer.
“Yeah I do. You did say
clit
, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Then hell yeah, I want to know. I am a guy.”
Jules gives him a once-over. “Yes, you are. And a very fine one.”
Lane gifts her with a devastating dimpled grin.
I clear my throat. “Lane don’t you have work to do?”
“No. I’m free until tonight.”
“Really? I’m sure I heard your mother saying something about cleaning…something.”
He shrugs. “Okay, not a brick wall here. I’ll leave you two fine ladies to your clit talk.” He laughs, struts to the door and exits.
“If you need any help with the cliterator, just text me,” he calls through the door.”
“Lane.” I say to the door.
“Lex,” he mocks and opens the door.
“Okay, I’m going to go clean…something.”
He shuts the door and we wait to hear footsteps walk away.
Jules sits back and sighs. “Lex, how are you? Really? And what’s up with Jaxson?”
“I’m fine. Really. I haven’t seen him or spoke to him. We’ve texted and e-mailed. Why, do you think something’s up?”
“Nick just said he seemed off.”
“Nick said, huh? How is Malibu Ken?”
“He’s great. When you pointed out before that he looked like Ken I wasn’t sure. But yeah, I see it now.”
“I thought so from the moment I met him.”
“The funny thing is—I hated Barbie and Ken dolls as a kid.”
“So did I.”
“They just weren’t right, ya know?”
“Yeah I get it. They represent an artificial and unattainable body image that confuses young children.”
“Well…no. That’s not what I was thinking. I was thinking that they needed to be more anatomically correct.”
“Of course that’s what you were thinking. Walked right into that one, didn’t I?”
“You sure did. You’ve been doing that a lot lately. You’re off your game sister.”
“Marco sends his love and kisses. He gave me a book to give you. Some biography or something.”
“Were you able to see him and Henry off?”
“No, I was in court. Nick and I had dinner with them the night before. I made sure to give them your card.”
“Can you believe they’ve been married for three years?”
“No, it seems like just yesterday. God they look hot together—don’t they?”
“Yes. Incredibly hot.”
“Well, they were pumped about staying at the Villa. They love that place.”
“I know that’s why I decided to gift it to them.
“Oh my God, Lex. They’ll be over the moon.
“I haven’t been there in years and they go several times a year. I wanted to give them the deed before they left but there was a hang up with paperwork. The agent that I hired in Florence didn’t get the paperwork filed in time.”
“Well they’ll be thrilled to death.”
“Everyone here seems so nice. I met Lester when Mary sent me to the kitchen with Marco’s dinners. He looks just like Mr. Clean.”
I chuckle. “Yeah, just like. Nice man, but God bless Marco for sending me meals. Lester thinks the only thing vegetarians eat is tofu.”
“So how is your investigation coming a long?”
“Good. Better than good.”
“Enough about me. I want details about you and Ken.”
“He’s so good to me, Lex. At first I thought it would be weird because I represented his ex-wife, and I really like her. But he has never brought it up.”
“You look happy, Jules.”
“I am. When I look at myself in the mirror. I don’t recognize myself. I’m a content and fulfilled person.”
“You’re in love, Jules. It’s written all over your face.”
“Yes I am. He’s the one, Lex.”
“Really?
The one
?”
“Yeah, if he ever asked me to marry him—I would.”
“From the girl that said she would never
ever
marry. Just goes to show you—never say never.”
“It scares the crap out of me, Lex.”
“Why?”
“Because we’ve only been dating for a few weeks and I already feel that I couldn’t live without him.”
“Yeah, relationships are scary. Not like I’m an expert or anything but you don’t need to be an expert to figure that one out. So how is the…” I raise a knowing brow.
“It’s fantastic.”
And speaking of sex
—Jules phone rings. She answers it and grins earring to earring. She holds up a just-a-second finger. Her smile is infectious and I find myself smiling along with her as she talks with Mr. Cain.
I love Jules. We’re complete opposites but we seem to work well together. Jules is stunning. She’s always reminded me of a Barbie and yes, I find it ironic that Nick reminds me of Ken. She has the biggest blue eyes and a cute little Barbie nose. She’s curvy and proud of it.
Jules looks at the world in color and yeah, she’s different, even a little wacko. Her misadventures are legendary and, at times, just plain fucked up. But hey, that’s just Jules. I think our connection runs deep because we both had unusual and difficult childhoods. Okay, we have issues—parent issues, relationship issues, trust issues and so on and so on.
I watch Jules as she talks to her
one.
She’s in love and it looks good on her. Love is wonderful and scary. Okay, what the fuck do I know about it? Not much—I totally suck at it.
Gram says you know he’s the
one
when your heart skips a beat. When you look at him, it skips, when he looks at you, it skips. When you hear his voice, it skips. When he touches you on your shoulder or you feel his breath on your neck…skip, skip. When he breathes in your scent, skip. When you breathe in his…skippy-skip. When I look at Jaxson, hear him, feel him, my heart doesn’t just skip beats, it almost stops. Crazy right? What the hell am I going to do?
I’m lying in bed nestled in between my Beeb sheets. I feel something brush against my leg. It tickles and I kick it away. It returns and I kick at it again. Then it speaks but the words are muddled. It continues to muddle-speak and I tell it to shut the fuck up and go away. Then it laughs and tugs my hair. I swat at it. Then I hear it speak my name and I open one eye. It’s hot. Okay, damn hot but I’m damn tired.
I was up late playing poker, shooting whiskey and smoking cigars with my new friends. It pulls on my hair again and I open the other eye. “What the hell are you doing?”
“I’m sitting on your bed, poking your legs and pulling your hair.”
“Let me rephrase. What the fuck, are you doing in my room?”
“You have quite the potty mouth, Alexia.”
No shit, Sherlock!
“You haven’t answered my question.”
He gives me
The Brow.
“Don’t give me
The Brow
. I hate it and it’s way too early. Just go away.”
“Why?”
I open my eyes. “Why what?”
“Why do you hate
The Brow
?” He smirks.
“Really?”
“Really.”
“It bugs me and you’re going to have one hell of wrinkle—bump thing, right in between your brows.”
He rubs the space between his brows.
Sorry man that’s not going to help.
“So…why are you here?” I ask again and sit up on my elbows.
“I just wanted to see you.”
“Why?”
“I’ve missed your beautiful face, your sarcasm and your potty mouth.”
I roll my tired eyes.
He smiles. “Okay, I didn’t miss the potty, just the mouth.”
I rub my eyes. “What time is it?”
“About five.”
“Five!?” I fall back down, grab my pillow and put it over my face. “Can we do this later, I’ve got a headache,” I mumble through my pillow.
“We haven’t even fucked and already you have a headache.” He laughs, I ignore him. “Serves you right; you’re a bad influence, Ms. Keith.”
“How so?”
“You’ve corrupted my entire house staff.”
“Corrupted?”
“Yes, corrupted.”
“Hey, It was Lester’s idea to play poker, Mary supplied the whiskey and Louie, the cigars. I just showed up.”
“And because you just showed up, Louie invited his crazy cousins who are passed out in my library. Lane got drunk and couldn’t pick me up at the airport. And that forced me to take a cab and stay in the city. Mary is MIA and Lester is too hung-over to make me breakfast.”
“That’s unfortunate, but not my fault. And FYI, your house staff is already corrupted.”