Layover (19 page)

“Don’t be stupid man, of course I care about Nya, she’s my sister-in-law. And of course I find her attractive, I mean, look at her. What man wouldn’t think she’s attractive? As far as Nya being in Denver, I don’t know why she didn’t tell you. Maybe you all don’t have much of a relationship and she didn’t want to tell you. If you want to know why I didn’t tell my wife, it’s because my wife had left me. That’s right, she left! I didn’t know if she was coming back or not. She told me she didn’t want to be married to me anymore. So when she came back, we had more important things to talk about than Nya’s travel itinerary. So, if your wife doesn’t love you anymore, that sounds like your problem, not mine.”

Everyone’s mouth was wide open. They were all in complete shock. I felt Allen did an excellent job of circumventing the real question of whether or not he had feelings for me. I was proud of him for standing up for me, yet still respecting my wishes to not tell everyone just yet.

“Well, at least my wife didn’t leave me. You’ve got your own set of problems,” Kenny told him.

“Well, she’s back. So my problems may be over but yours may be just beginning.”

 “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Kenny asked.

Surprisingly, Lisa jumped in after not being able to keep quiet any longer.

“It means Allen and I had our problems and now we are back together - for good,” She ended, as she rolled her eyes at me, “And, I have a surprise. This is as good a time as any to tell Allen that he is going to be a father again. I’m pregnant.”

My heart stopped beating and Lisa smiled like the evil villain on a soap opera. If everyone thought that they had been shocked before, they were floored by this new development. Allen was stunned. He looked over at me like he wanted to apologize. I could tell he really wanted to be happy about the baby but he didn’t want me to think he still wanted Lisa. Everyone took turns mumbling insincere congratulations. I didn’t know if I was going to pass out or just straight up die! This was a monkey wrench that I did not see coming. There was no way Allen was leaving his wife now, and even though she says she doesn’t want him anymore, she sure as hell is not going to let me have him. She may stay with him just to keep me from getting him.

 I really wanted to get up, but there was no way I could be the first one to leave that room. If I did, it would be quite obvious that I was hurt by the news. I just sat there waiting for someone to say something, do something, or just leave. I wanted to cry. I could feel the lump in my throat and I was afraid if I spoke, my voice would crack. Allen sat down next to Lisa and put his arm around her. They spoke quietly to each other and he placed his other hand on her stomach. I could feel myself getting light-headed and dizzy. It was so unfair. How could things take this horrible turn? I was about get everything I wanted, and now she’s all of a sudden magically pregnant. There was no way I could stay married to Kenny and watch Allen and Lisa bring another child in the world together knowing that I’m in love with Allen. It would kill me. So, my mind was made up. Allen or not, I was going to leave Kenny.

Lisa got up and went to the back. She returned with Andy sleep in her arms. She and Allen walked toward the front door.

“We’ll be back later,” Allen announced to the room.

Shortly after they pulled out of the carport, Kenny grabbed his keys. I’m going to Dinky’s. They’re supposed to be killing a hog. He left.

Alex went in the back to his room and I sat there with my mother-in-law and Denise. Those two weren’t going anywhere. I knew it was their intent to pick me apart and dissect everything that just happened. I decided I was going to try to escape, if they would let me. I got up and started walking toward my room.

“Ny, do you want to talk about it?” Denise asked me.

I stopped in my tracks. Without turning around, I answered, “No.”

I continued to walk when my mother-in-law tells me, “It’s not as bad as it seems.”

I turned around and tears gushed from my face. I held back the tears as long as I could until my head was pounding. I walked over to her and placed my wet face on her shoulder.

“Ny, what are you going to do?” She asked me.

“I don’t know, ma.”

“Baby, the first thing you need to do is be honest with Kenny. Saying you have feelings for Allen is not enough. You have to tell Kenny how you truly feel. You have to make a choice. You think you’re sparing feelings by waiting to say how you feel, but you are really hurting people. And when you hurt people, you get hurt.”

“It doesn’t matter now. Allen and Lisa are having a baby,” I sobbed.

“You know Allen. He is a good man and he is not going to leave that girl with a brand new baby. The only way you still have a chance with him is if she leaves him.”

“She told me didn’t want him.”

“She probably doesn’t, but she doesn’t want you to have him either. She would stay there and be miserable before she let you have him,” Denise jumped in.

“Nya, you’re missing the point. You’re doing the same thing Lisa is doing. You’re staying with Kenny because you can’t have Allen. You need to deal with your own issues before you move on to something else. If you don’t love Kenny anymore and you don’t want to be with him, tell him. Let him go. Then you will be opening the door to the possibility of having a relationship with Allen.”

Ma was right. It was something I had been struggling with for a while anyway, but I just didn’t know how to go about it. I mean, I don’t want to tell Kenny to leave my house, but I don’t want to leave either. With the money Allen gave me, I could help Kenny get an apartment, or I could just let him have the house and I could buy another house. I guess I never gave it whole lot of thought because at the end of the day, I was just too settled into my life to change it. Now I have this whole new reason to make changes and I don’t know where to begin. I want this life with Allen, but I don’t know where to begin. And now that Lisa is mad at me, I don’t know if she will ever relinquish my man! I imagine the only thing she wants more than to keep me away from Allen is for her to have her ex-boyfriend back.

 “Well, I say, if she left him once, she will do it again. Probably as soon as this thing with you cools down. Maybe you can wait her ass out! Why did she leave anyway?” Denise asked.

I looked at Denise and then at Ma.

“She told you?” Denise asked, intrigued.

I didn’t answer.

“She did tell you! What a stupid ass! That must have been before she knew you liked Allen. Well, tell us!” Denise pressed.

“Don’t say a word,” I warned them.

“Come on, girl. It’s going to come out anyway. You know niggas around here can’t keep shit!” Denise continued.

“She’s still in love with her ex.”

“That buster?”

“You know him?” I asked Denise.

“Yeh, he works with Allen and Lisa. He’s a little punk ass nigga!”

“Why do you say that?”

“He just is. He was still trying to get back with Lisa after she and Allen got engaged. He almost got fired from the job for harassment.”

“Well, she said she still loves him,” I informed her.

“I guess the harassment worked,” Denise joked.

“Well, she’s stupid if she’s going to stay with Allen just to spite you. Does Allen know about Lisa’s ex?”

“No,” I told Denise.

“Maybe he should know,” Denise suggested.

“I promised I wouldn’t say a word.”

“Well, I didn’t. I’m going to tell him. I’m not going to let her play my brother like that. Hell, that baby might not even be for Allen.”

“Yeh, my baby. But Allen is still not going to leave her until he finds out for sure,” Ma told her.

“Well, at least he will know,” Denise reminded her.

“Nya, your best hope is that Lisa leaves Allen,” Ma told me.

“Yeh, but why would she do that now?” I wondered aloud.

We sat there for a few moments until my mother-in-law summoned us to wrap things up in the kitchen. Thanksgiving was tomorrow and we still had a few more dishes to make. I was still feeling very down about everything. It was ironic because this is usually the happiest time of the year for me. I always look forward to coming down here for the holidays, and now something like this happens. I know that things will never be the same in this family and it’s mostly my fault. The best part about it is that at least there are only one or two people angry at me for it. I say one or two because while I know that Lisa is highly upset, I’m not sure if Kenny is even fazed by the whole thing. I think Kenny has it in his mind that there is no way I would ever leave him. He really thinks that much of himself.

After I finished in the kitchen, I went back into my room. I really didn’t know what to do now. I couldn’t even talk to Allen now. If I said one word to him, Lisa would be all in my mouth. What could he be thinking now? What is he feeling? I mean, I know his wife is pregnant, but if he really loves me like he says, he should still be able to break away, especially if he knows she only wants to stay with him to keep us apart. I thought about trying to talk to Lisa, but what would I say to her? She probably won’t even talk to me. I wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t. While technically, Allen and I haven’t done anything wrong, there are some things that we could have done better. I mean, it’s not like we’ve just been carrying on an affair or anything. If I had to do it all again, I don’t know if I would change anything.

I wanted to call Angela, but I knew she was probably at work now. I really needed someone to talk to. There was no one I could talk to about this, though. I tried to watch tv, I tried to read, I even pulled out my briefcase and tried to do some work, but it was no use. All I could think about was Allen. I decided that I really needed to talk to Angela, so I took a shower, got dressed, and went to the casino.

I got to the casino and rode the elevator up the executive offices. I got off the elevator and walked to her office. The door was closed, so I knocked.

“Come in.”

When I opened the door, I saw her sitting in her chair. She was hanging up the receiver of the phone.

“I was just trying to call you,” she informed me.

“Why, what’s up?” I asked, curious.

“Guess who just checked in,” she told me.

“Who?”

“Allen and Lisa.”

I felt my knees buckle. I quickly sat down in the chair by the door.

“Oh, Angela. It hit the fan today.”

“Girl, what happened?”

I told her everything that happened at the house.

“Ny, now is the time to walk away.”

“I know Angela, but I don’t think I can.”

“Girl, that man just checked into the hotel with his wife. That means that he is trying to reconcile with her. You can’t interfere with that.”

“That doesn’t mean anything! Kenny and I checked in here a few days ago. We were trying too, but the shit didn’t work!”

“Yeh, Nya, but we are talking about a new life coming into this world. You and Kenny don’t even have a child. Allen and Lisa are about to have two. Look, Ny. I’m your friend. I would never tell you anything to hurt you. You’ve got to back off. If it is meant for the two of you, you will be together. If not, move on. Whatever you do, don’t do anything to hurt yourself or your family. Just chill for right now, Ny, and wait and see how things turn out.”

I was sick. I started sweating and my heart was racing.

“Angela, I think I am going to be ill.”

“Just stay here as long as you need to. I’ll go get you some water.”

I sat there watching the room spinning. Maybe I am a White girl because every time the situation gets a little tense, I start with the dizziness and light-headedness. Whatever the case, I wasn’t well at all. So, when I heard the door open a few minutes later, I didn’t bother to look up.

“Ny. Ny are you alright?”

It was Allen. I must have looked terrible because my face was soaking wet with sweat and my hair was matted to my head. My hand was place dramatically across my forehead and my head was tilted across the back of the chair.

“What are you doing up here?” I jumped when I saw who it was.

“I saw you come in the casino. I followed you up here.”

“Where is Lisa?”

“She went to take the baby back to my mother’s house.”

“So you all are spending the night?”

“Yeh,” he admitted, reluctantly.

My heart dropped.

“Allen, how could you?”        

“Ny, she’s carrying my child.”

“How do you know?” I asked smartly

“Ny, don’t do this. Lisa hasn’t been with anyone else.”

“Oh, no? Not even when she left you?”

“Nya, you have no right to say anything like that.”

“Allen, what do you think Lisa and I talked about this morning when we went to the store, before she knew how you and I felt about each other? Lisa considered me a friend and confidant. She trusted me.”

“Are you saying she told you something else? Did she say anything about why she left me?”

“Let’s just say I know all about Michael at your job,” I said wickedly.