Leah's Seduction: 5 (Gianni and Leah - Leah's Seduction) (6 page)

Chapter 11

When she had some time alone, Leah wrote in her journal. Since Gianni had confided in her, it made her want him more than ever. That he had shared something that had nearly ruined him went a long way toward achieving the relationship she sought. One built on mutual sharing, love, and honesty.

The trust between them was strong; the sexual play they enjoyed depended upon it. The sensual room provided a safe atmosphere to act out the more extreme scenes. Just stepping inside sparked desire from deep within, and prompted Leah to give in to her urges.

Late one night, propped up on pillows in her loft bed, Leah spilled her feelings onto the pages of the journal.

Since New Year’s, it has been different between us. Always, the sex was good, and continually Gianni has shown me more of what is inside me. He seems to know before I do what I need, and what I’m capable of.

The honesty of his confession has drawn me closer. Every time I don’t think I could love him more, I find that I do. What happened with Ava was very unfortunate. But, being a woman, I understand it.

The first time I stepped in the playroom, I felt it. There is a dark need associated with it, one that I’ve become accustomed to. But it still holds magnetism for me that is impossible to pull away from. Ava must have felt it too. Being in that room with Gianni, she wouldn’t have been able to escape the spell. Nor would she have wanted to. Just like me. And having experienced it, letting go was asking too much.

I know how I feel around Gianni, and how it would wreck me if he abandoned me. What he calls the playroom is like stepping into another world, one filled with sensuality where there are no barriers to feeling. How could I give that up? It would leave a void that could not be filled. It must have been so hard for Gianni to leave that room locked for so long.

When I am in there with him, letting him command me, I find new freedom. I would have thought that being bound and controlled would be inhibiting. Just the opposite. It is a greater freedom than I’ve felt before.

And though we edged toward such acts, even from the beginning, it’s different in the room. It’s not only the equipment and implements of pleasure, though they do enable Gianni to do things with me that he wouldn’t otherwise be able to do. It is also that I feel so safe in there. The room is locked, soundproofed, and temperature controlled. When I have Gianni in there with me, I fear nothing. I know he will take charge, and that he would never hurt me. I allow myself to feel, to experience, in ever-changing ways. It’s always more, challenges me, and gives me such a consuming feeling of satisfaction.

All the while, Gianni transports me to new realms. I have permission to experience, and to feel. Boundaries are pushed, and though I may be nervous at first, I learn there is no reason to be afraid. I lean on his strength, and my nervousness disappears.

He guides me, teaches me, and protects me. It’s as if he knows what I’m feeling a split second before I do. Thus, he knows when to press more, and when to back off. It’s a sensual dance between us, the give and take.

When I submit, I feel more myself than I ever do. I don’t lose anything, I have more. Even I would not have understood it had I not experienced it. But it’s only because of Gianni. His focus is on my pleasure, though he may use the edge of pain to get me there.

My state of mind after an intense scene is outside my normal reality. I feel so protected and cared for. I don’t have to be concerned with what I should or shouldn’t feel. I need only to rely on Gianni. Only to trust.

Putting aside the journal, Leah turned off the light. She missed Gianni and had only spoken to him briefly earlier in the evening. Her flight from Portland had been delayed, but the driver had waited for her at the airport.

The need to see Gianni welled up inside her. She had been apart from him too long. In the weeks after returning from Tuscany, the intensity of the relationship bound Leah to him. Being separated from him, it felt like part of her was missing. And truly it was. Leah felt whole when she was with him, and couldn’t wait to be in his strong embrace once again.

*****

The next evening, Leah enjoyed a quiet dinner at the condo with the only man she loved. Gianni wanted to be alone with her, and having been away from him for so many days, Leah was glad for the private time.

Eating in fine restaurants hadn’t lost its allure. But there was something to be said for a relaxed dinner at home. Plus, Roselyn’s cooking equaled some of the finest cuisine Leah had sampled.

They made an evening of it, starting with cocktails and smoked salmon canapés. Gianni looked especially swoon-worthy in a textured gray polo sweater, and black jeans that fit him in all the right places. He looked relaxed and hadn’t bothered to gel his thick hair, which looked boyishly disheveled.

Sitting by the picture windows, with the darkness of the night reflecting through the glass, Leah couldn’t take her eyes off him. She sipped her martini and drank in the sexy sight of Gianni.

He gave her a knowing smile. “Enjoying yourself?”

“Now that I have
you
to look at I am.”

Gianni opened his arms, and Leah went to sit on his lap. “You were only away a few days.”

She kissed his cheek. “It was too long.”

He tapped his glass against hers, with a sparkle in his eyes. “I’ll make it up to you.”

Leah laughed. “You better.”

“How was your family?”

Leah put her arm over his shoulder. “Good. Mom is back to her busy self. She’s involved in lots of activities, fundraisers, church functions. I wonder how she keeps up with it all.”

“And your dad?”

“He works long hours in the bakery, but he has always loved it. I’m not sure he ever wants to retire.”

Gianni took a sip of his drink. “Someday I have to try some of his pastries. You’ve raved about them so much.”

“Definitely,” Leah said. “I didn’t see too much of Aubrey on this trip. She was working on a play at school and stayed late, even put in time on weekends. Costuming can entirely consume her, in a good way.”

“Is she still with her boyfriend?”

“With Chace? Yes, she says so,” Leah said. “I got to meet him once, briefly, when he came to pick her up.”

Roselyn announced dinner, and they moved into the dining room. Leah admired the colorful plates of food. “It smells delicious.”

The cook smiled. “Pan-seared black sea bass with Syrah sauce,” she said. “Bon appétit.” With a bow, she left.

Gianni was at the end of the table, and Leah sat next to him. He had opened a bottle of Syrah, and he filled their glasses.

“I always thought white wine paired with fish.”

Taking sip of his wine, Gianni nodded his approval. “That was true, and still is, if you are having mild trout or poached sole.” He put his glass down. “But Roselyn doesn’t cook that way. She is always trying new flavor combinations.”

“She must, because what she serves is always unique.” Leah sampled her wine. “Yet it seems to work. Her dishes are amazing.”

“So the white-wine-with-fish rule is outdated. Modern cuisine has too many options. I’ve learned, for each type of fish and how it’s cooked, to find a wine with similar qualities.”

“That’s interesting.” Leah scooped a bite of fish onto her fork.

“The black sea bass is a meaty fish. So I thought a richer wine would work, like a Zinfandel or Merlot. Even a Syrah.” Gianni raised his glass to make his point. He tasted his fish, then took another sip of wine. “I think they work well together.”

“Mmm,” Leah said, her mouth full of savory fish.

During the meal, Gianni updated her on news from the last few days. His show had gone well, and the new designer he represented was going to be a good addition. The sales for Natalie Baker Designs were impressive. And he had some other projects about to come to fruition. The year was primed for expansion.

They took their time with dinner, and finished the bottle of wine. When Roselyn came to clear their plates, Gianni said, “We’ll have our dessert in the library.”

“Certainly, sir.”

Gianni pulled out her chair and took Leah’s hand. The slight roughness of his skin, and his strength, excited her. As they walked through the main room, she glanced at the painting of the ocean scene high on the wall. Seeing the gift gave her a sense of permanency, however unfounded that might be.

The library was a welcoming room. There was a fire going, and overstuffed chairs to sit in. The colors were warm, and the carpet was thickly padded. Leah slipped off her shoes and let her feet sink into it. She took a seat by the fire and leaned back in the chair.

Gianni sat in a matching chair next to her, and pulled her feet onto his lap. The foot massage he gave her felt so good. “You’re going to have me really relaxed,” she said, closing her eyes.

It wasn’t long before the cook brought in the crème caramel on white china plates. “That’s nice of you to remember how much I like this,” Leah said.

The cook seemed pleased. She left a silver coffee pot with porcelain cups on the low table. “Anything else, sir?”

“No, Roselyn. You may go. The meal was delicious,” Gianni said.

For a few minutes, they focused on the creamy custard. When their plates were cleaned, Leah poured coffee. Gianni looked at the fire, watching the blue flames lap at the screen. “I’d like to talk about something,” he said.

“Of course.”

He turned to look at her. “I’d like for us to talk about what we do together.”

Her heart fell. “You’re not happy with it?”

“On the contrary,” Gianni said. “
No
woman has satisfied me like you do.”

Leah’s face warmed at the compliment. She had thought it was good between them. But hearing him say so meant a lot. “Words are inadequate. I can’t begin to express how you make me feel.”

Gianni was quiet for a moment. Then he reached out to take her hand. “In a sexual relationship such as ours, communication is very important. That cannot be stressed enough.” He paused. “The power you give me, your submission, can bring out many emotions. We need to deal with them together.”

What he said struck a chord. “It is very…emotional,” Leah said.

He brushed his lips over her knuckles. “I know it is, and I want you to share with me how you feel. Otherwise I won’t know.”

Leah glanced down at her lap. “Sometimes it’s embarrassing.”

“I don’t want it to be,” he said. “I want you to feel that you can talk to me.” His eyes were soft. “In the playroom…that’s not the place. Unless I ask you how you are feeling. But we must have other times when you feel you can be open. If you have concerns, I need to hear them.”

Somehow, playing out a scene and obeying Gianni was infinitely easier than talking about how she felt. It was more comfortable to pour emotions out onto the pages of her journal than to speak of them out loud. Maybe it would be better to let him read about her feelings than to voice them. But the idea made her feel emotionally naked. Leah wasn’t ready for that yet.

She looked into Gianni’s eyes. “It’s not a simple thing to do.”

“No, it’s not.” His caring expression made her feel that she might be able to tell him something, after all. “Let’s start this way,” he said. “Do you ever question this lifestyle?”

“I wouldn’t want anything other,” she said. “It’s what I’ve always needed, but didn’t really know how to ask for. But…”

Gianni raised his brows.

“Am I…weak…to want to be dominated?”

He shook his head. “You are strong. Don’t think you are some kind of doormat because of your sexual preferences.” Gianni looked deeply into her eyes. “I have to
earn
the power you give away. But even when you do, the power remains with you.”

Leah widened her eyes. “How is that?”

“You can choose to stop at any time, whether a particular scenario, or even to end the relationship if it no longer satisfies you.”

She shook her head. “I can’t imagine wanting to do that.”

Gianni pulled her onto his knee and wrapped his arms around her waist. “It’s up to me to guide you, and to talk with you as emotions surface. It’s even up to me to control my own fears.”

“What sort of fears?”

“That I might press you too hard, ask too much of you.” Gianni ran his finger over her lips. “Which is why it is so important for you to let me know when we try something new…what you’re feeling…what you want…what you don’t want.”

Leah sighed. “I will try.”

“I need you to.” Gianni put his hand on her thigh. “It’s not only about the scene. I have concerns for the emotions you may feel. And as much as I’ve tested your limits so far, it is only the beginning of what we can do.” He paused, as if giving her a moment to absorb what he had said. “But the more intense the scene, the more intense the emotions will be. And many emotions can surface, sometimes unexpectedly.”

Gianni held her close, pressing her head to his chest. Leah felt protected, safe. Yet his words sent a shiver through her. Could she continue to be what he needed? Would she be able to deal with the emotions he spoke of? Yet the promise of what Gianni could give her made her want to give
more
, to satisfy him as completely as she was capable of.