Leaving Eva (The Eva Series Book 1) (2 page)

“Is Daddy going to hurt me again? It really hurt, Mommy,” she said sadly, trying not to whimper.

“No, Brynn! Mommy won’t let Daddy hurt you like that again!” Mommy said. But Brynn was still afraid because Daddy hit Mommy, and nothing could stop him.

Mommy answered without Brynn asking, “I know Daddy hits me, but we can’t leave because he takes care of us. We need him. I’ll talk to Daddy and I won’t leave you alone with him again.”

Brynn was relieved. She wasn’t alone with him much, but if it were never, then he couldn’t hurt her again.

“Thank you, Mommy!” She loved Mommy so much. Mommy was pretty and nice, and Brynn loved her with all of her heart—to the moon and back, “I love you so much, Mommy!”

Mommy gave her baby girl a sad smile. She bent over and tucked Brynn in, leaving the night light on.

“Go to sleep, sweet girl. I love you, too,” she whispered softly.

Brynn closed her eyes and got as comfortable as she could. She moved around trying to get more comfortable despite the pain. All of her muscles hurt and her lip were stinging. She didn’t realize how tired she was, and she quickly started to drift off.

Mommy went downstairs, and just as Brynn fell asleep, she was jolted awake by the sound of Daddy yelling. Daddy was yelling at Mommy!

She covered her ears tight trying in vain to block out the voices. Mommy was screaming, and then there was a slapping sound. Something made a loud cracking sound, like the sound of wood splintering and breaking, which made her jump. Mommy cried out loudly.

Brynn huddled up tight in her bed and squeezed her eyes closed as she felt tears running down her face.
Daddy, please don’t hurt Mommy.
She wanted to run downstairs, but she was afraid.
What if he hits me again? Mommy, Mommy!
Brynn grabbed her dolly, Betsy, and hugged her until the screaming stopped. Then there was an eerie silence in the house. She tried to stay awake, because she was terrified that her door would open, and then he would come in and try to hurt her again. She strained to hear Mommy’s voice, but there was nothing but quiet. She listened hard for Mommy to make a sound, but she didn’t hear anything in the house. Her eyelids started to get heavy and she finally fell into a restless, painful sleep.

ELLIE HAD
BEEN IN LABOR
for eighteen hours, and she was exhausted.

When the pain began, the real fear had set in.
He
was supposed to take her to the doctor, but she had left him, and now she was on her own. She had no money, and nobody to take care of her, and she didn’t know what to expect.

She had started to feel pain early in the morning but did her best to ignore it. She had waited as long as she could, but when the water ran down her leg and into a puddle on the floor, she knew the time had come to do something.

“Honey, are you okay?” It was Martha, the kind gray-haired lady who volunteered at the shelter. Martha had been watching the pretty dark haired girl sit in the corner by herself for some time, in obvious pain. Ellie was quiet and kept to herself, so the older woman had tried to leave her alone, but she realized that she couldn’t any longer. As far as she knew, the girl had no family, no money, and no friends.

“I… think… I need to go to the hospital now,” Ellie said reluctantly, her sweet voice low but obviously in distress.

“Let me get my coat, then we’ll go,” Martha said moving faster than usual.

Ellie was shy and they had never talked much, but Martha was happy to be able to help because Ellie clearly needed it. Martha pulled the rusted old gray station wagon in front of the shelter and helped the girl into it. The twenty-minute ride to the hospital was quiet except for Ellie’s heavy breathing and occasional moaning. Ellie tried to focus on the scenery trying to forget the pain as they drove past the town’s library, the worn down elementary school, and the Piggly Wiggly.

Martha was driving as fast as she could drive, barely going five miles over the speed limit. She wasn’t used to going anywhere in a hurry, and now as Ellie started moaning louder, holding her heaving belly in pain, Martha wished that she had called 911, instead.

“Please… hurry,” Ellie pleaded. The pressure in her belly was mounting as they drove. She wanted to cry out but held it in.
Momma, why can’t you be here with me? I need you. Oh Momma!
Ellie had thought about going home many times in the past few months, but it had been so ugly the last time she was there.
I can’t face them after everything I’ve done. They probably hate me.

Ellie didn’t know what to expect at the hospital. She was used to stares and whispers in town, but she was terrified to face it from the people who were going to help deliver the baby.

The old station wagon chugged into the Emergency Room driveway. Martha got out of the car wincing as the arthritis reminded her that she was nearing seventy years old now. She told Ellie to wait, and then disappeared through the automatic doors. A few moments later, Martha came out accompanied by a young man dressed in all white and pushing a wheelchair. When they got to the car, he immediately felt sympathy for the young, small girl in the front seat. She looked fearful of him, her swollen belly speaking for her.

“Don’t worry, Miss, we’ll take good care of you,” he said gently, trying to reassure her.

They quickly got Ellie settled into a room with Martha by her side, assigning their most experienced nurse to her.

Ellie tried to relax, but the pain kept building inside, threatening to rip her in half.

Martha offered to stay, but Ellie knew that it was only out of kindness. Everyone at the shelter knew that Martha babysat every night for her granddaughter who was the light of her life.

“Thank you, but go to your granddaughter. I’ll be all right,” Ellie panted gratefully, squeezing Martha’s hand.

“Are you sure? If you’re sure…you’re welcome, honey. I wish you the best of luck,” the older woman said kindly, wishing she could have done more. Martha was anxious to get to little Lucy, but felt bad for leaving Ellie all alone.

Ellie smiled faintly. It was the first time that Martha had ever seen her smile and she was struck with how beautiful she was. Martha hesitated for a moment, and then turned around and walked away. She couldn’t wait to tell sweet little Lucy how Grandma had helped someone today.

After Martha had left, Ellie lay on the hospital bed gripping the cold rails firmly. As each wave of pain overtook her, each one more intense than the other, Ellie wanted to cry out but did her best not to. It felt as if her insides were pulling apart, ripping from the inside out, with one horrible cramp after another radiating through her. She was certain that something inside of her was being torn apart.

The nurses had poked her with needle after needle, taking blood, putting medicine in her back, putting bags of liquid up on a metal rod and into an IV, and hooking her to all sorts of monitors. The drugs they gave helped, but for some reason they didn’t alleviate all of the pain. Ellie tried imagining childbirth. She could never have foreseen this feeling of being split in two, her insides wrenched.

They tried to distract her with television, but it didn’t work. It had been so long since Ellie had watched her favorite sitcoms, but even her favorite show couldn’t make her forget her misery. She had always wished the family on it were her own. The parents understood the kids and everything always ended up happy. Ellie had been close to her mom and dad, but when she started seeing
him,
they had disapproved. They wouldn’t allow her out of the house, even after much begging and pleading.

* * *

“He loves me!” she had pleaded with them, trying to make them understand. Her parents obviously didn’t love her because if they did, they would have wanted her to be happy. They said he wasn’t right for her, and they wouldn’t listen when she disagreed. The last time they fought about him, Daddy told Ellie that she was grounded forever and not allowed out of the house without permission again. Daddy was yelling, and Ellie and Momma were crying, but Momma was still on his side.

How can they keep me from the man I love?
She just couldn’t understand it.

Ellie knew they would never understand!

“It’s like we’re Romeo and Juliet,” she had whispered to him late at night on the phone, after her parents had gone to sleep. “I need to be with you. I just can’t live without you. I love you so much.”

“I need you, too,” he said his voice full of wanting for his little schoolgirl. Ellie loved how just the sound of his voice could stir her up so much inside. She had never met anyone like him before. Nobody ever made her feel the way he did, especially not the immature little boys at school.

“You’ll have to rescue me. Pick me up from school tomorrow and then we can always be together.” Ellie had given it a lot of thought since the fight with her parents. She packed as much as possible in her biggest Luis Vuitton bag, and hid it in the back of her closet. If he picked her up from school as soon as Daddy dropped her off, then they could swing by the house, pick up the bag, and run away together.

“Are you serious?” he seemed hesitant. He was definitely into her, but wasn’t sure that Ellie was worth risking another stint in jail. The parents would definitely call the cops.

“Don’t you want to be with me?” Ellie said in her best pouty voice, obviously hurt.

“Of course I do, Princess. I just don’t want your parents to call the cops on me. I know they will!” he said watching his words. She was young but feisty, which is what he liked about her the most.

They talked out their plan, and the next day after Daddy dropped her off at school, she watched for
him
to pull up. As soon as Ellie saw him, she ran out of the building, jumped in the car, and they raced to the house. The drive home was glorious and freeing, and she felt something inside of her come alive. The sun was out and Ellie lifted her head to the sky grabbing the warmth on her face for as long as possible. This was going to be the first day of the rest of her life and Ellie was finally going live it as her own. She wanted to savor it, taste every bit of it with her beautiful man by her side.

Getting the bag was easy as she dodged the service help, but then again Ellie was used to sneaking in and out of the house. When she retrieved her prize and ran out of the house, she threw the bag into the car, drunk with anticipation and excitement.

They managed to duck the cops for months by moving from one spot to another until they began to feel safer. Ellie couldn’t imagine that her parents would continue searching for her for too much longer, and they settled into a scant one-room apartment in the worst part of town. Ellie didn’t care where she lived as long as she could be with him.

They were so happy together in the beginning. Ellie loved that he knew so much more than she did and that he was just a little dangerous. He was the best-looking guy she had ever seen, and he made her feel beautiful and special. Ellie didn’t care about his bad reputation for using and selling drugs because she knew that he only did it for fun. His mother was a free spirit, and she taught him how to be one, too. Now he was teaching Ellie to be one, and she enjoyed the freedom.

He introduced her to marijuana and wine coolers, and Ellie loved how relaxed they made her. They smoked and drank and made love all day long. Ellie forgot how much she missed her parents and home, at least for a little while.

But seven months later, she missed her period.

One after another and then another and Ellie realized that as her pants grew tighter and the morning sickness took over, she was pregnant. But he didn’t want her to stop smoking and drinking even though Ellie knew that would hurt “it” inside of her. She didn’t know what to do with “it” yet, but she knew that she didn’t want to kill it or harm it in any way. He didn’t care about hurting “it” and told Ellie that she wasn’t any fun anymore.

As Ellie got rounder he refused to touch her. “You’re getting fat!” he said, his disgust clear, in his eyes. “I don’t have sex with fat girls. Maybe you should stop eating so much, so you don’t get so large.”

She was in disbelief. At four months, her belly protruded only slightly from her thin frame and the pregnancy was barely visible. “You’re so mean!” she said, trying not to cry again. Everything he said seemed to make Ellie cry.

The second she started to show, everything between them instantly changed.

“Maybe you should have thought about that before you got yourself pregnant,” he said cruelly. “I’m going to need to find someone else until you’re back to your old self. You don’t turn me on looking like that, and I didn’t bring you here to play ‘family’! I can’t believe you did this! You’ve ruined everything!” He took a big drag off his cigarette and blew smoke in her face, making her cough. The next day, he came home with a girl that looked suspiciously like her, only not pregnant. “This is Tricia,” he said barely looking at Ellie. “She’s here to take care of my needs while you’re out of commission. I’d have you join us, but I don’t think I could stomach it.”

Then he dragged the girl into the back bedroom, and Ellie could hear them. The apartment was small, and the unmistaken sound of the bed creaking was horrifying. She ran to the bathroom and crouched on the floor with her hands over her ears, but she could still hear the moaning and the screaming, the good kind.

She realized that he didn’t care about “it,” or about her and she felt betrayed. She had left her family for his love, only to find out that he didn’t love her at all. She had never wanted to have a baby, and now she was pregnant with
his
child, and he didn’t even care!

A week later, Ellie waited until he passed out, and she left him in the middle of the night. She hated him now and couldn’t wait to get away.

She remembered that her church had donated clothes to a woman’s shelter a town over. As Ellie walked down the road, a nice woman stopped her car and asked if she needed a ride. She didn’t usually take rides from strangers, but Ellie made an exception this time. The woman dropped her off at the shelter and wished her well.

As Ellie’s belly got bigger, she became more and more frightened.
I don’t know the first thing about having a baby,
she thought.
What kind of mother will I be? I have no idea what I’m doing.

Now as the labor pains came, the panic started to grow uncontrollably. And she was scared and alone, except for the nice nurse that never seemed to leave her side. The nurse had introduced herself but Ellie forgot her name. All she knew now was that she was gripping the nurse’s hand with all of her might as the pain grew inside. An older man appeared in the room wearing a mask. All she could see were his wire-rimmed glasses, his kind brown eyes, and a shock of white hair under his blue hospital cap. It was obvious he was in charge. “Oh, she’s a young one,” he said to no one in particular as he looked at Ellie’s sweaty, exhausted face.

The pain had been going on for hours, and Ellie’s body was close to ready but she was exhausted and needed sleep.

“You can’t sleep now, young lady. I’m going to need you to push for me. You’re ready and your baby needs to come out,” the doctor said in a firm, but kind voice.

But as the pain came hot and fast, Ellie was terrified and she thought for sure she would pass out.