Lessons in Love (22 page)

‘Remember to turn the hot water on. And there’s a wood pile out the back for the fire.’

‘It’s OK,’ Emily said, smiling reassuringly. ‘I know where everything is, and if I’ve got a problem, I’ll call. I Promise.’

‘Have a safe drive, Emily.’

‘I will Sonya. And thanks. For everything.’

They drove in silence. Veronica and Steven spoke occasionally to each other, but both seemed to realise that Emily wasn’t in the mood for conversation.

When they finally pulled up in front of the beach house, Emily gave a big sigh and smiled sadly, remembering the last time they’d visited, when she’d realised that she had to marry Nicholas for the baby’s sake. How quickly those weeks had gone by, and how much things had changed since then!

It was upon opening the door and stepping inside, that Emily remembered all the effort they’d gone into over the past few weeks, packing their possessions and delivering them to Nicholas’s house, the house they were all supposed to have been moving into tomorrow. The last thing she wanted was to go and collect everything, and unpack again in her own small house. The kids must be devastated, she realised, knowing how much they’d been looking forward to moving into the big house with her and Nicholas. Well, it wasn’t to be. They’d been happy before they’d ever met Nicholas, and they’d be happy without him, she vowed.

Until then, she had no time for men! She had work and her study to remember. She could go back to focussing on those goals now, the goals she’d had for so long. But now, somehow, everything seemed bleaker. Her ambitions no longer served to fire her up and motivate her. Thoughts of her dreams only made her feel lonely and bereft.

Without being asked, Steven lit a fire and Veronica hunted through the cupboards for something to eat. Whatever they used, Emily would replace tomorrow after a visit to the shops, now she didn’t have the energy or the inclination. Besides, she was starved. She hadn’t eaten since breakfast, and her hunger returned with a vengeance.

They found tinned vegetable soup and some frozen bread, and Emily ate with more appetite than she’d expected. Then the two adolescents turned the TV on and settled down to watch, while Emily perused the single bookshelf, hoping there’d be something she could read.

She’d finally settled down on the comfortable cane armchair with a book, when she heard a sharp knock at the door. Her heart jumped fiercely in her chest, and her brother and sister both turned to look at her, alarm pasted on their features.

‘I…I’ll go see who it is,’ Steven, in the role of man of the house, suggested, but Emily shook her head.

‘I’ll go.’ For the life of her, she couldn’t think who’d be visiting. Perhaps it was a neighbour, who seeing the lights on, assumed Sonya and Andrew were staying there.

But it was no neighbour on the other side of the door.

‘Nicholas!’ she exclaimed in dismay. His eyes burned into hers, fury etched into his face. He pushed past her.

‘Are your brother and sister here?’ he demanded.

‘Of course.’ She nodded, trying to maintain calm on the surface, while inside she quaked. ‘Wh…what are you doing here?’

‘That’s what I’d like to ask you! But first, get a coat. We’re going for a drive.’

‘But…the kids.’

‘The kids will be fine, won’t you?’ Hearing Nicholas’s voice, they’d come to see what was going on, and both nodded vigorously. ‘Lock the doors behind us, and don’t answer if someone knocks. You’ll know if it’s us.’

‘Just wait a Goddamn minute, Nicholas!’ Emily spluttered. ‘How dare you barge in here like this and command that I go anywhere with you? Or make decisions about my brother’s and sister’s safety. For your information, I never allow them inside the house alone at night without a sitter.’

‘Well then, it’s high time you stopped being so damn protective! Steven’s almost as big as you are, for goodness’ sake. You have to let them grow up sometime. Now, get your coat!’ The demanding tone in his voice was too much for her to bear.

‘No! I won’t. Get out Nicholas. Can’t you understand that I don’t want to see you again? It’s over between us!’ But she couldn’t control the slight quaver of her tone, and she cursed it. Why did he have to turn up here tonight of all nights? She’d strangle Sonya when she saw her, for evidently as soon as she was out the door her friend had called Nicholas and told him exactly where she was. And that, she thought, was unforgivable!

‘Emily. I won’t tell you again. Get your coat and get out to the car!’ Something in his tone pierced her to her very core. He was so cool, so controlled, but beneath the surface he was ready to explode. She sighed in resignation and anger at herself for obeying his commands like some submissive prehistoric woman who couldn’t say no.

‘Fine,’ she snapped, and grabbed her coat out of the hall closet where she’d hung it just an hour earlier. ‘We won’t be long,’ she told Veronica and Steven, who watched Nicholas and Emily with interest.

The night was bitterly cold, but she forced herself to walk tall and proudly to his car, refusing to allow him to open the door for her.

‘Where are we going?’ she asked, as he started the ignition.

‘For a drive.’ They didn’t drive far, though, stopping on a cliff top parking area, looking down towards the ocean. For a moment, she didn’t think Nicholas would speak, but finally she saw him turn towards her out of the corner of her eye, and when she didn’t turn her head, he brought a hand to her chin, and forced her to face him. She looked at him haughtily and he growled softly in his throat, the expression on his face hard and unreadable.

‘Why?’ he demanded.

‘Why what?’ she answered obtusely, refusing to play to his tune.

‘You know what I mean! Why break the wedding off? Why humiliate me like this!’

‘Humiliate you!’ she sputtered. ‘I didn’t break the wedding off to humiliate you! I broke it off because there is clearly no reason for us to get married, and I wasn’t going to go through with the farce just so you could save face!’

‘Save face!’ he spat back. ‘Is that all you think of me?’

‘I’m just repeating what you said! Nicholas, for goodness’ sake, isn’t it better to break off the wedding now, rather than divorce in a couple of years’ time?’

‘Divorce? What are you talking about?’ His tone had softened slightly, and the look in his eyes was questing, almost pleading.

‘You know why, Nicholas. Because you don’t love me! You only wanted to marry me because of the baby, because you felt it was the right thing to do.’

‘That’s not true…’ he began, but she wouldn’t let him finish.

‘Yes it is! Why else would you have responded as you did? You didn’t care about the pain I suffered today, you cared only for the inconvenience I was causing our guests! If you’d really, truly cared about our marriage, you would have said so!’

‘And if you’d really, truly cared about our marriage, you wouldn’t have broken it off as you did!’ he replied, frustration in his tone.

‘How can I care when I know you don’t?’ she pleaded with him.

‘Oh, but Emily, I do care. I’ve always cared! Always!’ She shook her head in denial.

‘But not enough!’

‘For God’s sake, Emily! How much do you want me to care? There is no one I care for more than I care for you!’

‘Then you must live a frightfully lonely life, Nicholas, because it is clear how little you care for me.’

‘Is it? Oh is it?’ he demanded, fury tearing the words from his lips, and then, without giving her a chance to respond, he pulled her roughly against him, his lips seeking hers and claiming them, demanding furious surrender. And surrender was all she could do. She longed to push him away, but was unable. The pent up passion and desire within her filled her from the soles of her feet to the top of her head, as a liquid warmth filled her entire being. Her mouth opened to his tongue, and she received it gratefully, moving even closer towards him as a low moan escaped her throat.

He broke off suddenly, leaving her feeling alone once again. ‘See how little I care?’ he muttered. ‘How many women do you think I kiss like that, Emily? How many women have I ever kissed like that, with every ounce of my being? Not a one. There’s never been, and can never be, a woman who makes me feel like you do, and I know you feel the same about me. I can feel it when we kiss, when we touch, when we make love. We become as one – one mind and one body, inextricably linked, sensing each other’s moods and feelings, perfectly complementing each other. Don’t you feel it, too?’

‘Yes. Yes I do, Nicholas. I always have. But…but what about love? Never once have you told me you loved me, and for that reason I can’t marry you. Don’t you understand?’

‘Can’t you see, Emily, what I’ve been saying? Love is all I feel for you! I’ve loved you since the instant I saw you, it just took me some time to come to that realisation. I never, ever, would have proposed to you otherwise.’

‘Y…you do? B…but you’ve hardly touched me these past few weeks. Ever since I told you about the baby…even before then…’ She shook her head in denial at his words, hoping against hope they were true, but unable to believe that she could be so lucky.

‘Oh Emily! Don’t you think I’ve wanted to? Don’t you think my life has been a hell without you? But I’ve held on, knowing that we’d soon be together, knowing that after we became husband and wife you’d be mine for ever. I wanted you to know that I was marrying you for love, not just because of the baby, and I thought that by holding my distance, respecting you, that I’d be demonstrating that.’ He shook his head ruefully. ‘But I was clearly wrong. How could I have been so blind?’ he said in agitation.

‘I didn’t realise, Nicholas. I’m sorry. I thought…you seemed so distant all the time…I could only believe it was because you no longer wanted me, and was only marrying me for the child.’

‘Oh, Emily! I’m so terribly sorry I put you through this. I should have told you the truth! I should have told you how much I care for you. How much I love you! I love you more than you could ever imagine, Emily. I love you in a way I never dreamed was possible. Please tell me you feel the same!’ His voice pled with her, desperate for her response.

‘Nicholas! Oh, Nicholas. I do love you! I’ve always loved you. I was marrying you, knowing that you didn’t love me, in the hope that one day you would come to feel as I did!’ And with that, he pulled her against him again, and their kiss was like nothing she’d ever experienced before. Filled with more passion and desire, but also with something else – with the complete understanding of their mutual, undying love for each other.

They spent the night together in the beach house, locked in each other’s arms. But when Emily awoke it was to an empty bed. She smiled slightly, moving her sore body into a sitting position, as she ran her hand over Nicholas’s side of the bed, feeling his heat still emanating from the sheets. She stood and stretched, a satisfied smile on her face, as she pulled her bathrobe on and headed to the bathroom.

Nicholas was getting out of the shower, and he smiled as he saw her. ‘Hi sleepyhead. I didn’t want to wake you too early, but I’m glad you’re up. We’ve got a wedding to attend at three o’clock!’ He grinned boyishly at her, and she shook her head, not understanding.

‘But…but how? We called the wedding off! You called all your guests, and Sonya…’ Nicholas shook his head, and swatted her gently on the rump with his damp towel, exposing the entire man beneath, and she sucked in a sharp intake of breath.

‘You flatter me still, my lady! Let’s see what happened…you called me and announced that there would be no wedding. In fury, I hung up the receiver, poured myself a stiff Scotch and tossed it down like water. After storming up and down the length of the house for…oh…about ten minutes, the phone rang. Who do you think was on the other end?’

‘Sonya?’ she replied wryly.

‘Exactly! So between the two of us we concocted this little plan. You see, Emily, I was entirely unwilling to let you go. I’ve been a battler all my life. I’ve had to work hard, push myself hard, to get where I am today and I’ve never given up without a fight. And there was no way in hell I’d give up the woman I love without a fight either! I was determined to convince you to go through with the wedding even if I had to drug you and brainwash you into marrying me! Fortunately,’ he said with a grin, ‘you capitulated far easier than that!’

‘You beast!’ She laughed, and suddenly everything in the world was right. The winter sky outside was bright blue, and even at this early hour of the morning the air was unseasonably warm.

‘I now pronounce you husband and wife!’ announced the celebrant, and Emily turned to her brand new husband.

‘I love you,’ she whispered.

‘I love you,’ he responded in kind, and bent down to kiss her gently on the lips. Unable to resist, she wrapped her arms around his neck and laughing he swung her up in the air, to the delighted cheers of their friends and family, and Emily felt sure she was luckiest woman alive.

‘Just wait until I get you alone, Mr Cavanaugh,’ she whispered naughtily. He laughed softly in her ear.

‘We’ve guests to attend to Mrs Cavanaugh, but when the reception’s over, watch out!’ Her entire body sung with anticipation for the night ahead as she looked into the warm loving eyes of her husband, secure in the knowledge that she’d learned her lessons in love.

I hope you enjoyed my first published romance novel,
Lessons in Love
.

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Lessons in Love
on Amazon. I’m hugely appreciative of everyone who takes the time to review my work, whether they loved it or not!

Victoria Sinclair – December 2013