Letting Go (12 page)

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Authors: Bridie Hall

BOOK: Letting Go
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“Bad publicity for his business, a waste of his time, who knows?” The curt answer was like a smack across the face.

“God, he’s
… a monster.”

“Yeah, and not the fairytale sort.”

“Did you have anywhere to go at all?”

He
answered lightly as if they were discussing their next vacation. “It was summer. I stayed under a highway bridge for a couple of weeks. Cops busted me and brought me in. They were about to lock me up for peace disturbance, when this old dude showed up out of nowhere and convinced them to let me go, that he would take care of me.”

“Wow, what?”

“My thoughts exactly.”

“What happened?”

“He was a guru of sorts to a group of youngsters that had lost their way. Really old, but he looked about fifty. He had leathery skin and long hair. He was skinnier than me at the time and that says something. I’d turned eighteen a few days before so there was no need for a parent or guardian to come pick me up. They let me go. I was beyond caring so I didn’t protest when he took me to his house.”

“But why would he
do something like that?”


On the way to his place he told me his story but I remember just fractions of it, I was so out of it. He’d had a son who’d gone missing two years before, I think. He was an addict too and Vernon—the guru dude—felt that he was dead. It was just a feeling, he said, there was no actual proof that his son had died. When he saw me at the station, he figured he could at least help someone else out. He took me in, he got me into a detox program and the rest is history.”

“Wow,”
Isabelle whispered. “That’s … so much goodness in a crappy situation.”

“Missy was one of the people he was trying to help, too.
That’s how we met. He’d rescued her from a freaky cult.”

“Oh.”
No wonder they were so fond of each other. They had met at their lowest points and supported each other through the worst times of their lives.

Harper
didn’t speak for a long while. It was still raining outside and the raindrops pattered on the windshield in a staccato rhythm. Isabelle glanced at Harper every now and then. His expression was neutral. He stared straight ahead and even though she suspected he felt her eyes on him, he didn’t return the gaze. Awakening the painful memories by telling her his story must have stirred some raw emotions in him. She wished she could hug him, tell him she felt for him. But he could misunderstand, she told herself. Better she not do anything stupid.

S
he was overwhelmed by everything he’d told her. She had had no idea what he’d been through. When Jamie mentioned the drugs, she got the impression that it was just a short period of craziness during which he experimented and did stupid things like many teenagers. She had no idea he’d been so profoundly gone. And yet he came back, got clean, sorted out his life. Immense determination and strength must have been needed for that.

“Did you ever
feel the temptation to do drugs again?” she asked and was startled by her own voice that cut into the rainy silence.

His eyes flicked over t
o her for a second, then back to the road. He didn’t seem upset by her question. “Of course.”

It sounded simple, said like that, but it couldn’t have been
, Isabelle guessed.

“How did ... How did you stay clean?”

“I kept busy.”

“With school?”

“That too.”

She wanted to ask what else but she felt as if she were interrogating him.

“Does Jamie know this?”

“About my drug problem? Sure. Dad made certain that he knew his older brother was scum.”

At a loss for words, Isabelle sighed. What could anyone say to that? She felt a lump in her throat and she realized, stunned, that she was close to tears. Parents were not supposed to be like that, she thought. They were supposed to keep the family together, not let it break apart.

“So ... how come you are now living with
Jamie? I mean, if he thinks you’re no good, why is he letting you stay with him?”

“I’m surprised he didn’t tell you.”

“Tell me what?”

“Oh, you know, this whole saga with his good for nothing bro and t
he broken family, the renegade mom, and the tyrant of a father. The messes that we are would make him look good, the only normal member of the family.” Harper smirked deprecatingly.

“You’re normal. You’re ...”

“What?”

“You’re a hero for sorting your life out after
all the shit that happened to you,” she said, her voice thick with emotion.

He laughed so unexpectedly that
she jumped in her seat.

“You are
.”

When he calmed, he said, “Not even close,
Isabelle. Not even close.”

She didn’t want to argue, he’d never agree with her anyway.

He looked at her, and then swerved to avoid something that looked like a trash bag that someone threw out the window.


Dad, as righteous as he is, got involved with the wrong crowd. He did a couple of deals with them. Stolen spare parts, I think. Then, when things got hot, he changed his mind and said no more shady deals. Let’s just say, the guys didn’t take it kindly.”

“What has that got to
do with you moving in with Jamie?”

“They threatened Dad that he’d have no one to leave the business to if he didn’t change his mind and do it quickly.”

“You’re joking!” Isabelle was shocked and for a second thought Harper was indeed teasing her.


You never wondered why Jamie moved here his junior year?”

“Because a bunch of criminals threatened his life?” Isabelle
’s eyes were wide with horror. She’d met her boyfriend because some thugs were after him and he moved to her hometown to hide from them? “But he never said … He didn’t seem afraid. Or … like he was running from someone.”

“Well, I guess he didn’t know all the details. Anyway,
Dad sent me here to look out for him. As an extra precaution.”

“But ... You’re ...” She didn’t know what to think or say.
“This is insane! They can’t just threaten to kill someone.”

“Relax, they’re behind bars.
I doubt they were serious about it, anyway. Dad just got scared, that’s how he is. Brave when he confronts his son and throws him out of the house, but a wimp when dealing with the big bad wolf.” He sounded much too calm. He should be furious, upset, afraid. She sure was.

“How can you be so glib about this?”

“Like I said, they’re behind bars. They got busted in a raid. Besides, they never would’ve done it, that’s why Dad sent Jamie away instead of calling the police. He did it so he could sleep at night.”

“And you came to guard your brother
? They could’ve killed you both.”

He shrugged.

“Why didn’t you resist your dad? Tell him to inform the police instead?”

Harper
didn’t answer her question. Her heart was beating frantically. She couldn’t believe that the boy she’d been dating for almost two years had had a death threat hanging over his head and she never knew about it. Yes, Harper was there, but if someone intended to kill Jamie, how on earth could Harper stop them?


Jamie doesn’t know?”


I think he suspects, but doesn’t know anything for sure.”

“But
why would he move or, if he’s mad at you, let you stay with him if he doesn’t know about this?”

“Oh, but he trusts Daddy
. He probably told him aunt Joelle would be happy if she had someone for company. That he’d gain more experience changing schools. Meet new people. Something like that. And then he told him to take me in. So he did.”

Isabelle
stared at him.


Jamie, well, he’s the good son, you see. He does what Dad asks him to do.” The scathing voice made Isabelle shiver. Harper resented Jamie.

“Do you hate him?”
The question was so preposterous that she whispered it.

“Dad?”

“No, Jamie.”

“No.”

She thought that was his whole answer, but then he continued. “I resent him that he’s Dad’s lapdog. He doesn’t want to see what a bastard the old man is.”

“Didn’t you tell him what he’d done to you?”

“He wouldn’t believe me, anyway.”

“Maybe you should try. You could be surprised,” she said.

“I know my family, Isabelle.”

She didn’t know what to say to that.

“I didn’t mean to sound so harsh. I ...”

“I get it,
Harper. No worries.” She understood. No outsider could ever understand the dynamics of a family.

“If the threat is over now,” she said, still reeling from what he’d told her, trying to wrap her head around it, “How come you stayed?”

A shrug was his only answer.

She looked at his profile and he pretended that he didn’t see her stare. She understood why he put his own life on the bac
kburner and came to protect Jamie. There was that brotherly bond again, Isabelle thought. The emotion she so rarely glimpsed between the two brothers felt strong as steel every time she did.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

“What for?” he asked perplexed.

“For
telling me. For protecting Jamie.”

“Meh,
I think I regret it now. If someone offed him, then you’d be crying your heart out on
my
shoulder and I could get you into my bed easily.”

“Jesus,
Harper. Can’t you just say ‘you’re welcome’ or something?”

“Oh, you
are
welcome, Isabelle, any time.”

She tried ignoring his chuckle but in the cramped space of his Chevy
that was difficult. She knew he was trying to lighten the tense atmosphere. It annoyed her nonetheless.

She pumped up the volume of the radio and
Michael Bublé sang about saving the last dance for him. It reminded her of the dance she’d shared with Harper.

At the
spring break school dance, Harper snuck in after two in the morning and when the party was already winding down, she ran into him in the empty hallway. She didn’t drink because she’d had a headache earlier that day and alcohol made headaches worse. Jamie was in the gym with his friends. She went to cool her face in the restrooms in the school building because the ones in the locker rooms were puked all over.

Bon Jovi’s
“Wanted Dead or Alive” was playing in the gym, the sound booming every time someone opened the door.

“Leaving already?”
Harper asked when he saw her.


I needed some air.” She wore a black dress Chloe had made and given it to her as an early birthday gift. Chloe said it was meant to make Jamie swoon when he saw her. And it did. It was short, with a ruffled skirt and a halter neckline. Fancier than anything Isabelle had ever worn before. Chloe also lent her a pair of statement silver earrings and silver flats. The colors complemented Isabelle’s short blond hair and tanned skin.

“From the barfing outside and the noise, I’m guessing the
party’s a success?”

“I guess,
” she laughed.


Jamie?” Harper raised an eyebrow.

“He’s inside with his
friends.” She gestured towards the gym door.

“And you’re out here all alone?”

He walked towards her, stopping a few steps away. His hands in his pockets, hair mussed and a quizzical look on his face unsettled her. There was an unreadable undertone to it all.

“If you can call me alone with hundreds of teenagers just yards away.”

He smiled. She’d never seen him smile so ... softly.

T
he noise and music assaulting them periodically became a nuisance that she wished she could get rid of.

“Yeah, I
’m sure it’s crowded in there. Here, however ...”

He stepped closer. “We can dance without bumping into anyone.”

She thought he was joking, but he extended his hand towards her and waited with a smile hovering on his lips.

She tried thinking of an excuse. There was nothing wrong with dancing with one’s boyfriend’s brother. But what he had in mind was not jumping around, twisting and moving with the crowd. His extended hand implied touching, lots of touching, dancing close to each other.

Yet as she watched his dark eyes, the silent lips, the expression that was pleading but not, her mind drew a blank. She cleared her throat in one last attempt for him to realize she felt awkward so he’d back off, but he smirked and placed his hand on her waist and entwined the fingers of his other hand with hers. His skin was warm, his eyes playful when she unwisely looked up.

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