Life's a Beach (22 page)

Fortunately we got to keep on our shorts and T-shirts, though lots of people were wearing bathing suits. A tiny part of me still wanted to be discovered, but not necessarily in my bathing suit. It seemed that the plan was for the crowd to surge forward on the beach when Riley started to scream. Apparently the movie was in no danger of acquiring a plot. It also seemed like it might take the rest of the year to set up the shot, since it involved a camera backing uphill over a dolly track in the sand.

As we walked over to the holding tent, Geri pointed to a section of beach that was marked with caution tape and surrounded by lots of people. “Is that where the shark is?” she whispered.

I looked. “I’m not sure. If it has any brains at all, it’s already taken off again to try to find a better movie.”

The extras looked just like normal people, which I supposed was the point. Everybody was sitting around in folding chairs under the tent, drinking bottled water and fanning themselves.

“Well, this is fun,” Allison Flagg said about five minutes later.

I was just about to say,
Well, who invited you?
, when Geri’s cell phone rang. She pulled it out of her bag and said hello. I knew it wasn’t a BlackBerry, but I was glad she still had something.

Geri walked to the edge of the tent to take her call, and Allison Flagg and I ignored each other. I wished I’d planned ahead and brought some earring-making supplies, but I had to settle for turning my chair sideways so I could see and digging in the sand with my toe. I found a big fat piece of light green sea glass and bent over to pick it up. Tim Kelly walked by and I pretended not to notice.

“That was Seth,” Geri said when she came back. “He wanted to know where I’d like to have my birthday dinner when he and the girls get here Friday.”

“That’s all you’re going to do?” Allison Flagg said. “Isn’t this your fiftieth?” It might have been my imagination, but it seemed like she was sending some accusatory energy my way. I kept digging for sea glass.

“It’s fine, really,” Geri said. “Being an extra is plenty. I’ll be immortalized on celluloid at fifty.” She ran her hand up and down her neck. “Do you think all this flabby stuff will show?”

Allison Flagg leaned forward. “What flabby stuff? I don’t see anything. You look great. Nobody would ever guess you were almost fifty.”

“Thanks,” Geri said.

I kept digging. When we were kids, we used to try to dig all the way to China. It would be nice to still believe it was possible.

The extras guy clapped his hands. “Okay, background. In your places, everybody. And turn those cell phones off and keep them off.”

“THEY’RE KILLING ME HERE,”
Manny said. “I can’t believe the studio took away my crane shot.”

“It’s not what you got, it’s how you make it work for you,” Riley said.

“Thanks, kiddo,” Manny said. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Riley turned and rolled his eyes at the twins, and they both started to giggle.

Some people came over to sweep the sand off the dolly track again. Riley went back into the water, and the extras guy yelled, “Places,” even though we’d already been in our places for what felt like a couple of centuries.

“Picture’s up and clear.”

“Rolling.”

“Marker.”

“Action.”

My heart started beating like crazy and my legs wobbled a little as I pretended to talk with Geri and Allison Flagg. Being an actor was much harder than I had thought it would be. I was waiting for Riley’s scream, but it still took me by surprise. My heart actually skipped a beat, and then started racing. I don’t know whose side of the family he got it from, but he sure had one bloodcurdling scream.

We all turned and started surging toward the water.

“Cut!” Manny yelled from the top of the beach.

We did it again. And again. And again. Over and over, with the hot afternoon sun beating down on us. The extras were like a big flock of sheep, and the extras guy was the shepherd, nipping at our heels to keep us in place until Manny finished getting his shots. I only hoped it would happen in this lifetime.

In between takes one zillion and one zillion and one or so, Geri leaned over and whispered, “I am so over this. Do you think anybody would notice if we left?”

The extras guy had good ears for a shepherd. “Don’t you dare,” he said. “I’ve already signed your vouchers.” He clapped his hands together and yelled, “Places, everybody.”

“By the way,” I asked him, “which one is Manny’s mother? I’m supposed to keep an eye on her.”

“Let me see,” he said. “It’s hard to keep the family members separate from the birthday parties.” He put his hands on his hips and looked around. He pointed to a woman in a bikini. “That one,” he said before he walked off again.

“Ohmigod,” Geri said. “That’s Manny’s
mother
? I am seriously depressed. How old do you think she is?”

We all watched Manny’s mother for the next eight or ten takes, weighing good genes against probable surgeries, until Manny finally yelled, “Cut! Print!”

I licked my parched lips to make it easier to speak. “Well, Sis, happy birthday.”

Geri shook her head. “You know, I don’t think that was quite it. Your fiftieth is supposed to be memorable, and all I’m going to remember is Manny’s mother in that bathing suit.”

“I’ve got just the thing out in my car,” Allison Flagg said. “I’ll be right back.”

24

AS SOON AS I TURNED MY CELL PHONE BACK ON, IT
started to ring. “Hi, Dad,” I said.

“Have you seen him?” my mother asked.

“Who?” I asked. For some strange reason, I thought she might have been talking about Noah.

“Your father.”

“Oh. Have you tried my apartment?”

“I’m there now.”

“Gee, just make yourself at home,” I said. I kicked the sand with my toe and reached down to pick up a sand dollar. I wondered if it would shatter if I tried to drill a hole in it.

“Thanks,” my mother said. “Listen, those kittens are making a real mess over here. They’re awful cute, though, I’ll give them that.” I waited while my mother talked baby talk to the kittens. “What is our old rumpus room table doing over here anyway?”

“Ask Dad,” I said.

“I’ll have to find him first.”

Try the dump
, I almost said, but I caught myself just in time. My mother would connect the dots soon enough. I waited while she talked some more baby talk to the kittens. I wondered if my father had given them names yet, or if he’d wait and let me help him decide. What would you name black and white kittens? Vanilla and Chocolate? Salt and Pepper? Ebony and Ivory? Opal and Onyx? Knock Knock and Who’s There?

“How’s your sister holding up?” my mother finally asked.

I tiptoed a few steps away from Geri. We were waiting for Riley to come out of special effects, where he was having his stump removed. She was twiddling her thumbs again, and her lower lip looked like it might start quivering at any moment. “One minute she’s up, the next she’s down,” I whispered.

“She’ll be fine,” my mother said. “And it will turn out to be an opportunity in disguise. Keep reminding her she can be anything she wants to be.”

“I don’t think I have to, Mom. She pretty much has it down by now.”

“Well, good. And don’t tell your sister, but we’ll be coming down with Seth and the girls to celebrate her birthday. Listen, your phone is ringing. I’d better get it in case it’s your father.”

I flipped my cell phone closed as soon as I heard the dial tone. “Who was that?” Geri asked.

“Just Mom,” I said. “She was looking for Dad.”

Geri raised her eyebrows.

“Okay, okay,” I said. “And she wanted to know how you were doing.”

Geri looked down at her twiddling thumbs as if they belonged to someone else. “What did you tell her?”

“That you could be anything you want to be?”

We were still laughing when Allison Flagg came running over. She handed Geri an oversize paperback book. “Here, you can borrow this for the night. You’ll definitely find something for your fiftieth in it. It’s got everything. Luxury, adventure, insider tips by location, great florists.”

“Florists?” I said. “Sounds exciting.”

She gave me a dirty look. “It is
the
guide to be listed in. It can change your life. I’m on a committee to try to get the town of Marshbury included.”

“Wow,” I said. “You’re really selling this.”

“
User’s Guide
,” Geri read out loud, “
to the Fun, Feisty, and Fabulous
.” She held it out to Allison Flagg. “Thanks so much for thinking of me, but I’ve been researching for months. I probably could have written this.”

Allison Flagg stroked the cover reverently and gave the book a little push back in Geri’s direction. “No, really, you won’t be able to put it down.”

Now I was curious. I grabbed the book from Geri.

Allison Flagg grabbed it from me.

I grabbed it back from Allison Flagg. I felt like we were in a
Three Stooges
episode, and my next move would be to try to poke her in the eyes with two fingers, and she’d hold the book up to block me.

Geri held out her hand, and I gave her the book. “Grow up, you two,” she said. She turned to Allison Flagg. “Thanks, I appreciate it. I’ll read it tonight.”

“Good idea,” I said. “It’ll probably put you right to sleep.”

Allison Flagg glared at me and took the book back from Geri. “Okay, let me find a good one. Here, just listen to this.”

I yawned.

Allison Flagg cleared her throat. Then she paused, as if she were expecting a drumroll. “
Italian Monks. Every day at four-thirty in the winter and five-thirty in the summer on this street corner in Florence you can hear them singing Gregorian chants.
There’s a phone number, too.”

“I didn’t know monks had phones,” I said. I wondered if Noah had happened to stop by Florence while he was in Italy. Maybe he’d heard these very same monks. I could ask him later. I’d have a quick bite to eat with the gaffer, since there didn’t seem to be an easy way out of it, and then I’d call Noah.

“Very cool,” Geri said.

“Oh, I already know about this one,” Allison Flagg said.
“Custom makeup blended just for you by fashion chemists in Paris. Ten thousand dollars and up, depending on skin tones.”

“I heard Nicole did that,” Geri said. “And Elton.”

“Not to be cheap,” I said, “but is there a sale page?”

“I don’t think so,” Allison Flagg said. “But how about a solar-powered milk frother? It comes in six colors, and it’s only nineteen ninety-five.”

“Yeah,” I said. “But then you have to put in the skylight to make it work.”

“Not necessarily,” Geri said. “You could use it outside.”

“SO, DO YOU THINK
we’ll actually find something in that book we can do for your birthday?” I asked my sister as we walked across the parking lot while Riley ran ahead.

“I doubt it,” Geri said. “I was just being polite. It’s a skill you might want to consider cultivating.”

I pretended her comment was too subtle for me to catch. She sighed. “I mean, it’s not like I can afford to go to Florence, now that I’m not working.”

Her lower lip looked like it was ready to start again. “Oh, come on,” I said. “You couldn’t afford to go to Florence even when you were working.”

“Thanks,” Geri said.

Most of the cars had cleared out of the parking lot, and a few stray seagulls were dive-bombing a garbage can. “So,” I said. “What do you think you’ll do for work next?”

Geri’s lower lip started to quiver again.

“What’s the rush?” I said. “Take some time off. Enjoy yourself for a few months.”

Geri stopped walking. “Are you crazy? Do you have any idea how much our mortgage payment is?”

“You can always move in with me,” I said. My sister shook her head and stomped off to catch up with Riley.

We picked up takeout for Geri and Riley so they could eat it out by the pool at the Fisherman’s Lodge. When we got to the hotel, we stopped at the front desk so Geri could ask the same pierced, pink-haired girl wearing the same
GONE FISHING
T-shirt to send a cot up to our room. This was a detail I would only have thought of after I’d changed into my pajamas. We waited for the pink-haired girl to acknowledge us, and Riley grabbed the key card so he could run up to the room and change into his bathing suit.

When we got to the pool, we saw Allison Flagg and the twins eating takeout at one of the round tables. They all looked up and waved.

“Great,” Geri said. “Civilized company for dinner.”

“Where?” I asked. Riley came back wearing a suit and carrying a towel, and ran right by us.

“Walk,” Geri said. She shifted her arms under the take-out bag. “Ouch,” she said. “This is hot. Okay, I’ll see you later. Have a good date.”

“It’s not a date,” I said. “You know, maybe I’ll go take a walk or something first. It’ll only take me a minute to change.”