Like the Dawn (Lark #3) (3 page)

Chapter Three

            
 
A
fter breakfast, I decide to get some air before I meet up with Grey in the library for my daily lessons. As much as I'm looking forward to spending some time with Isobel this afternoon, I can't deny that the dark cloud that has been hovering above me for days seems darker than usual this morning.
              Whenever I need to be alone, but don't want to be locked up in my bedroom, I venture to the gardens. I think the elves are so accustomed to their beauty that they don't even notice how remarkable they are anymore, so no one ever comes out here just to enjoy the scenery like I do.
              I wander around until I find my favorite area—a little grassy patch surrounded by larger than life yellow roses. I lay down in the feathery soft grass, enjoying its sweet floral fragrance and staring up at the sky. Our grass isn't like this in Kansas—at least not in my backyard. The kind I’m used to is prickly and always made me itch whereas here, well, I could lay in this grass all day.
              As wonderful as it is, I would definitely trade the soft elfish grass for the prickly mortal grass if it meant that I could be with my mom and sister again. Not for the first time I find myself wondering if I could persuade Alberico to let me reverse the memory charm once everything is said and done and Dugan and the Dökkálfar are no longer a threat.               That's assuming that there will be a time when they won't be a threat any longer.
              Right now, it's an overwhelming idea since I have no idea where to even begin. Dugan will be nearly impossible to defeat. There's a reason Sól made me immortal—that was the only way I stood a fighting chance.  If it doesn't work, I don't know what will happen. Every time I try to think about it, I feel as though my head might very well explode from the pressure.
              Even if I am successful in my conquest—which is unlikely—I'm still not sure how long it takes to reverse a memory charm or if it's even possible. Nor do I know if Alberico will let me risk the exposure of the Light Elves. I think he would—he let me tell them before after all, but I can't be sure if that was simply because he knew we would be erasing their memories almost immediately afterward, so it wouldn't matter anyway.  I hope he will let me.
              “What are you doing out here?” Adele asks, her face appearing above me. I was so lost in my own thoughts that I didn't even notice her arrival until she spoke.
              “Just thinking.”
              “About anything in particular?”
              I don't answer right away, mostly because I'm trying to pinpoint exactly what it was that I was thinking about. “Nothing and everything all at once. Honestly there is just so much—everything's just sorta blurring together.”
              “Do you want to talk about it?” she asks.
              “Not really,” I admit.
              “Do you want some company?”
              “Sure.”
              “Have you been out here long?” She lays down on the grass beside me.
              “Since after breakfast, I guess.”
              “Mia, are you okay?”
              “Yeah, I guess. I'm just frustrated.”
              “I understand that. But you have to trust that everything will work out,” she assures me.
              “I don't know if I can do this—I don't know if I can just sit here knowing that Dugan and the Dark Elves are free to hurt innocent people all because of me.”
              “We cannot rush this, Mia.”
              “I just don't understand why we can't just—I don't know—attack them!” I rant in frustration.
              Adele laughs. “Honestly Mia, you should know by now that being reckless rarely works out favorably.”
              “Fair point.” It was, after all, my recklessness that is to blame for our current predicament. My people are officially at war and it is all my fault.               “On the other hand, some may consider your recklessness to be brave. You did save the Duchess.”
              “Yeah, but you could have easily accomplished that with the stupid flowers.”
              “True. I was a little put out that you had to steal my thunder,” she says, elbowing me playfully before adding a little more seriously, “It was bound to happen, Mia. It was in the prophecy.”
              “I just wish that it hadn’t been me. That my screw-up wasn't to blame.”
              “We will end this.”
              “I hope so.” 
              “I know we will. We'll figure it out.”
              If only the rest of the kingdom felt the same way.  By nature, most elves choose to use elemental magic for defensive purposes only. However, I'm not sure how we are to be successful in our quest to defeat the Dark Elves, who are far more skilled in weaponry than we are, if all we have going for us is defensive magic. So far, nobody else has had any grand ideas either.
              Everything seems so hopeless.
              “I better get going,” I say as I stand up and brush the grass off of my dress.
              “Lessons with Grey?” she asks.
              “Yep.”
              I think I detect a brief pang of sadness in her eyes but before I can ask her about it she smiles and says, “Have fun.”
              “Yeah, I'll try.” I try to return her smile but it's hard because a part of me feels guilty. I suspect that her sadness has something to do with me and Grey.               I wish I could tell her there was nothing going on between us, but honestly, I'm not sure if that's true. I may not know how I feel about him anymore but he made it pretty clear that he's in love with me. I didn't think anyone else was aware of his declaration but maybe his feelings are more obvious than I thought.
              “Do you want to maybe hang out afterward?” she asks. It always catches me off guard to hear her talk like—well, like a normal teenage girl and not an elf who happens to be over one hundred years old.               “Sure,” I tell her, with a smile on my face. “What do you want to do?”
              “I think I may have something for you.”
              That piques my interest.
              “I'm having tea with Isobel later but I'm sure she won't mind if you come along. Do you want me to meet you in your room first?”
              “That would be great.”
              “Okay, I'll head your way after my lesson with Grey.”
              “I'll see you later then,” she says.
              Grey's already waiting for me when I get to the library. He's always early, like our study sessions are the most exciting part of his day and he doesn't want to miss one second of them. I, on the other hand, could take them or leave them, despite knowing how invaluable they truly are.  I suppose I should be more grateful that he is willing to teach me what he knows.
              His eyes brighten upon my entrance, but he quickly recovers his usual unaffected manner. I wave awkwardly in greeting then join him at the desk where he is surrounded by neat stacks of ancient, leather-bound books covered in thick layers of dust, as well as what appears to be a map. 
              Though I'm still not really sure how to act around him since he confessed his love for me, I try hard to pretend that I'm unaffected. Especially since Alberico has left Grey in charge of teaching me everything I'm supposed to know about Álfheimr and the elfish culture.
              I thought things were weird before when I didn't know how Grey felt about me, but that was nothing compared to how it is now that I do. I can't help but feel like he expects something of me—but I don't know if it's something that I can give him anymore and I think that's what makes it so hard.
              “What's that?”
              “A map.”
              “Obviously, Sherlock. A map of what?”
              “You should have been more specific.” He smiles. “It's a map of Álfheimr.”
              “Cool. So okay, I'm guessing today is a geography lesson?”
              “Obviously, Sherlock,” he retorts, with an easy smile.
              “Wow, someone is feeling a little spunky today.” I roll my eyes. At least he doesn't seem to feel awkward around me—or maybe he's just better at hiding his true feelings than I am. I suspect the latter is probably true.  “So Professor, are you going to teach me or what?”
              Grey pulls out a chair and gestures for me to sit down. “Make yourself comfortable.”
              I plop down on the plush cushion and I'm tempted to prop my legs up on the desk but think better of it since I doubt Grey would find it very funny. Plus, it wouldn't be very lady-like while wearing this stupid dress.
              “As I was saying, this is a map of the kingdom. It's imperative that you become familiar with it if you are to be on the throne one day.”
              “Yes, well that's a big fat 'if' and, besides, I think I'll have this place completely memorized like the back of my hand after a few hundred years, don't you think?”
              “Mia,” he reprimands.
              “Fine.” I make a show of sitting up straight so that I can really pay attention but I'm totally rolling my eyes on the inside.
              “We are bordered by two separate rivers; the Raumelf and the Gautelf. The Raumelf flows through the mountains on the western border while the Gautelf is on the east.”
              I stifle a yawn. I feel like I'm in the seventh grade again and being told that by the end of the year I'm going to have to map out every country in the entire world. Sure, this map isn't nearly as extensive as the entire earth but the names are funky and I'm seriously caffeine-deprived right now so it's hard to really pay attention.
              “Are you listening?” he asks, clearly exasperated.
              “Mm-hm.” I'm unable to stifle my yawn this time.
              He sighs in response. “This is going to be a long day, isn't it?”
              “I'm sorry,” I tell him then add more sincerely, “I don't mean to be a pain.”
              “It just comes naturally?”
              I smack his arm. “Not funny. Geography is just not my strong suit.”
              Plus, I have absolutely no sense of direction. If I ever got stranded on a desert island I'd be pretty much screwed. I'd probably curl up in the fetal position and just cry.
              “Yes, I remember from high school.” He sighs heavily, rubbing the bridge of his nose before looking back at me. In that one look it feels like he can see deep inside me—like he can see my soul and he understands me, knows me, better than anyone in the world. It's a heady feeling. 
              Breaking the moment, he asks, “Is there something I can do to make this less painful for you?”
              “Probably not but could we maybe go outside? It's so stuffy here in this library,” I grumble.
              I love books and usually under normal circumstances I would love nothing more than to spend an entire day in a library just browsing all the different leather-bound adventures.
              I just don't feel that way about this particular library—partly because I can't even read any of the books since my elfish sucks so it's a little hard to enjoy a pleasant afternoon read in here.
              But mostly it's because lately I hate being locked indoors period. It's like I crave being outside in the sun's warmth. Something about the fresh air and sunshine rejuvenates me.
              “If you think it will help.”
              “Well, I can't promise
that
.” I point out. “After all, this stuff is torture—if I didn't know it was impossible, I'd accuse you of trying to cause my death by boredom!”
              “You are truly absurd.”
              “Yeah, but you love me anyway,” I joke.
              “That I do.” His voice is tender and causes the heat to rise in my cheeks as I realize what I just said.
              Our gazes lock and a million things are left unsaid. I know he's waiting for me to say or do something but I can't move or speak or breathe. All I can do is stare into those indigo blue eyes staring longingly back at me.
              A loud crash breaks me from the trance and I look behind me to find the cause. Adele is standing there with an arm full of books and a faint tinge of pink on her cheeks.
              “Oh! I'm so sorry,” she apologizes. She seems uncharacteristically anxious. “I didn't mean to disrupt. I just need to grab a few books. I can leave if I'm going to be in your way.”