Linda Goodman's Sun Signs (61 page)

Famous Aquarian Personalities

To wade bravely smack dab into the center of the problem, don't expect an Aquarian male to behave the way people in love are supposed to behave. If you do, you're in for quite a jolt, maybe even a series of jolts. When it comes to friendship, he's all you could ask for in a pal or a confidant. Love? Well, as an Aquarian I once knew said, “Anybody can have a woman. But love is something else again.” That was an astute observation. It's “something else,” all right, with Aquarians.

It's when he acts as though he doesn't like you that he's close to being hooked, and the reason is elementary—simple logic. The Aquarian water bearer likes everybody. Everyone is his friend. He'll even refer to his worst enemy as “my friend.” So it means something when he says he doesn't like someone. Just what it means may take some study. The various nuances can be complicated.

An Aquarian man doesn't want to reveal his true feelings, in spite of his favorite pastime of penetrating the feelings of others. His own reactions and motives are complex, and he intends to keep them that way for the pure pleasure of fooling you. Many strange experiences will come to this man, through both love and friendship, and he'll scrutinize each one avidly. Until you get him to the altar, you're just another experience, another experiment, hard as that may be to take. Don't sniffle. He can be tricked, for all his caution. But before you start tricking him, you'd better try to understand how to cope with his unique outlook about people.

He's a group man, and teamwork comes naturally to him. Aquarius understands the fair play rules of sports as if he had invented them, and he carries these rules into his personal relationships. His interests are scattered all over the place. That's because his love of people is so impersonal; he gives a certain value to everyone he meets, while the rest of us save such efforts for only the very special people in our lives. To an Aquarian, everyone is special. And I mean everyone. Even those he hasn't met yet. Few Uranus men are either selfish or petty. When he does show those qualities, a gentle reminder that he's being narrow-minded will bring him around. Aquarians just can't stand to be called narrow-minded.

He responds to unusually high ideals, thanks to his rigid moral code (though you'd better understand that it's his own code, which may not necessarily reflect or correspond to the one accepted by society in general). He'll almost surely lead a life of change, controversy and unexpected events. Yet there will often be moments of perfect tranquility with him, impossible to find with any other Sun sign. Once he's over the shock that he's allowed himself to become interested in one woman above all of mankind, he can be an extremely considerate lover. The danger area is before he's over the shock. Since he's so accustomed to neglecting his own problems in the interest of the majority, hopefully some of this attitude will rub off on his love life. Don't count on it, though. The chances are just as good that he'll suddenly realize he's devoting his complete loyalty to you, when there are all those other nameless faces out there that need him. Then he may lean over backwards to prove to himself that he hasn't lost his love for his friends and the rest of humanity by being attached to just one person.

Forever analyzing, the Aquarian man will frequently ask himself, “I wonder what she meant by that?” He won't rest until he finds out either. A puzzle drives him simply wild and don't be fooled by his nonchalance. When he senses something is hidden, he just won't sleep at night until he's unraveled the mystery and penetrated the veil. There's always the possibility that he might be disappointed in what he finds, so make sure it's worth discovering. If it isn't, he'll have no qualms about making it painfully evident—and off he'll go to unravel a new veil.

The woman who wants to land him eventually has first to intrigue him. An open book will never pique his curiosity. He's attracted to closed pages, the more tightly closed, the better to arouse his detective instinct. When a female either ignores him or keeps her own counsel, in the beginning at least, his eyes will open a little wider and he'll get an alert expression, amazingly like that of a bloodhound on the scent of something missing. Why is she so emotional? (You can be emotional, you see, as long as you don't explain why.) Is she really so changeable or is it an act? Why does she wear all that perfume and make-up and such low-cut dresses, and then get insulted when those Leos and Sagittarians and Scorpios whistle at her? Does she want male advances or doesn't she? Is she a puritan or promiscuous? What makes her tick? As he probes and questions and examines, the woman is at first flattered, naturally—but when she sees he's just as intently curious about the waitress who just served them (not to mention the bus boy), she begins to cool somewhat. Feeling like an insect trapped under a scientist's cold eye isn't exactly calculated to cause the heart to flutter in any feminine bosom. So she finally drifts (or runs) away to a more fiery or earthy male and the Aquarian sadly sighs for an instant or two before he begins his next romantic investigation. (If some new invention or unique idea hasn't aroused his interest first. In which case the next female research project must wait.)

Aquarian men can be touchingly gentle and docile, but you'd better tie a bright blue electric string around your finger to remind you that his surface calmness is a mirage. So is his apparent pliability. He won't tolerate an ounce of opportunism from a female. If he thinks he's being exploited, that unpredictable Uranian charm can vanish so quickly you'll think Hal Holbrook has turned into the Grinch, poised to throw a grapefruit-half in your face. The frightening thing is that an extremely upset Aquarian is perfectly capable of such shocking action. What's even more frightening is that you may forgive him. Don't. At least, not more than once. He admires a woman who holds her ground, if she's not too masculine about it, and if she lets him fly hither and yon, unencumbered by mushy promises and tearful accusations. As for that grapefruit, it's only fair to point out that Aquarians are usually most gallant with the fair sex. But sometimes they can forget to distinguish between the sexes in the throes of excitement. Couple that with the Uranus unpredictability, and it does add up to a possible squirt of grapefruit juice in the eye.

There's always an excellent possibility that an Aquarian will achieve some sort of prestige during his lifetime. If it's only a trophy for stickball or a brass plaque for being the tallest man in Succotash County he's sure to be honored with some kind of recognition. It could be something as splendid as winning the Nobel Prize. Lots of Aquarians achieve such distinctions. (On the other hand, a large percentage of disturbed Aquarians are weekly visitors to a head shrinker. It may be kind of tricky to tell the difference.)

Some Uranus-ruled men have a fetish for cleanliness. You may bump into one who shrieks if anyone uses his towel or breathes on his oatmeal. Back of this is an almost neurotic fear of germs and illness. The Aquarian isn't above letting his phobias trail over into his romantic life, when they can serve a purpose, though he may do so unconsciously. Don't be surprised if he complains that he's allergic to your eye shadow and it makes him sneeze. Uranians have a way of developing allergies to things they'd rather avoid, and they can even fool the doctors, let alone innocent, unsuspecting women.

He's not the type to woo you with extravagant gestures. He's as likely to pull up a dandelion and toss it at you as bring you an orchid. To be honest, more likely. He won't present you with mink coats and diamonds. But life with him can still be glamorous, even without the mink. There's the well-known story about Helen Hayes and her husband, Charles MacArthur. When they first met, he handed her a bowl of peanuts and said, “I wish they were emeralds.” Many years and many dollars later, he gave her a cluster of glittering emeralds with the remark, “I wish they were peanuts.” I don't know if MacArthur was an Aquarian, but Uranus was certainly prominent in his natal chart. That's exactly the kind of unexpected glory you'll know with an Aquarian lover. Who needs mink?

Now let's face the worst fact courageously. No flinching or wishful thinking. Here it is. Unlike Cancer, Capricorn, Leo and Libra, Aquarians don't take to marriage like a baby takes to candy. To be truthful, most of them avoid it as long as it's humanly possible. A rare Aquarian male will be enticed into a shower of shoes and rice at an early age, but it doesn't happen often enough for the statistics to be encouraging. The way the impasse usually starts is that the Aquarian makes beautiful, wonderful, glorious friendship the basis of the love. (Easier to slide away from later, my dear.) They choose a woman who's also a chum, and who can keep up with the Aquarian interests, including Mickey Mantle's batting average, crossword puzzles, Arabian horses, fireflies on the Mississippi and the Dead Sea Scrolls. Why? That's easy. With so much to talk about, there's less time for lovemaking, which can get him seriously involved and committed. His ideal is the female who is his friend, and who doesn't make heavy emotional demands on him. Where do we go from here? Nowhere, usually.

Aquarian men find it difficult to relax in physical expressions of love. That first goodnight kiss may be a long time materializing. Admittedly, it's often well worth waiting for, and the suspense makes it even more special. But he'll cling to the illusion that he's involved in a nice, safe platonic friendship long after such a palsy-walsy relationship has become impossible for you.

Even after he's mustered the courage to say “I love you,” he'll avoid the issue of marriage with every excuse in the book. When those run out, he can think up some pretty imaginative new ones. He'll patiently explain that he can't support you in the manner you deserve, his parents need him at home, or he's not good enough for you. If that doesn't work, he'll claim that the future is too uncertain, what with the threats of nuclear destruction and all. What if his boss sends him to Alaska next year? You might die of pneumonia up there, and he would be grief-stricken the rest of his life. You think he can't top that? One Aquarian man I know was engaged for twelve years to a woman he wouldn't marry because “she would have to sacrifice a great career on Broadway.” The fact that the woman had never set foot on a stage in her life was beside the point.
He
thought she had talent. Someday, a producer might just discover her. Then how would she feel if he had held her back by marrying her? Worse yet, how would he feel? Guilty. Just plain selfish and guilty. It's not surprising that this poor female finally escaped to a more positive rival.

But all is not lost. Though it's true that most Aquarians wed late, they do eventually wed—usually. It normally happens after the last bachelor friend has sailed away to a Bermuda honeymoon, and the Aquarian wakes up to realize that here is a mystery other people have solved that he hasn't even investigated. Naturally, he can't stand that, so pop goes the proposal! Suddenly, of course. Uranus, you know.

In the early stages, you may think he needs a lesson and decide to let him think he's lost you to a more aggressive suitor. Let me warn you that you're likely to stay lost. Your brokenhearted Uranian is not nearly as apt to come charging after you with the fire of possession in his eye as he is to shed a couple of quiet tears and say, “Well, I guess the best man won.” He'll resign himself to a life without you with insulting ease. He's even liable to ask the unbearable question, “Can't we still be friends?” If you say no emphatically, he'll probably just shrug dejectedly and slowly walk away. If you say yes—well, you're right back where you started—friends.

Jealousy isn't his cup of eggnog. He'll trust you until you show him you can't be trusted. Not because he's trusting by nature, but because his analytical dissection has already satisfied him about your character. Unless there are marked afflictions in his natal chart, he's not capable of unfounded suspicion and possessiveness. If he does have a rare stab of jealousy, you'll never know it if he can help it. He will rarely, if ever, be physically unfaithful himself, mostly because the whole subject of sex, though it's interesting, doesn't consume him. An occasional Aquarian may spend a great deal of time intensely pondering sex, but if you know one of these, you can safely assume there's a heavy Scorpio influence in his natal chart. (And chances are even this type won't pursue it actively and openly.)