Living a Lie (37 page)

“When the boat’s sold, and we’ll have cause to celebrate!”

“That’s all right,” Kitty assured him. In fact she was immensely grateful. With the wedding a little over a week away, there was still much to do.

Mildred collected the afternoon post as she came in.

“Here’s one for you,” she said, handing Kitty a dainty white envelope.

Taking the envelope Kitty turned it over in her hands before holding it to her nose and gently sniffing.

“Perfumed,” she remarked curiously.

“Who on earth would be writing to me in a perfumed envelope?”

“You won’t know if you don’t open it,” Mildred chuckled.

“I don’t suppose for one minute it’s from Georgie?”

Kitty laughed at that.

“Not for one minute,” she confirmed.

“This perfume smells very expensive. Georgie tends to get hers from the market stall.”

While Kitty opened the envelope, Mildred attended to her many items of wedding correspondence. She had a fistful of replies to her wedding invitations, and a pile of bills that must be settled in the next week.

“I must have been mad to let Eddie rush me,” she sighed, pushing her spectacles back from the end of her nose.

Kitty took out the letter.

“Don’t tell me you’re beginning to regret it all?” she asked with a sly little smile.

Mildred shyly bowed her head.

“Course I don’t,” she said tenderly, adjusting her spectacles.

“We were made for each other.”

Kitty smiled and returned her attention to the letter in her hand. The spidery scrawl was neatly written in the centre of the page; the edges were painted with garlands of flowers, and a sprig of blossom at each corner. Intrigued, Kitty silently read.

As she did, the colour drained from her face. Finally she dropped the letter to her lap and leaned back in the chair, her eyes closed and her hands visibly trembling.

Sensing the change of mood, her aunt looked up. Kitty’s face told its own story.

“What’s the matter?” she asked, laying her pile of correspondence on her knee.

“Bad news, is it?”

Gathering her dignity. Kitty put on a bright smile.

“No, it’s good news really.” She handed the letter over.

“Read for yourself.”

Straightening the page, Mildred again adjusted her glasses and began to read aloud:

First of all, please let me say how very much Harry and I enjoyed your party. I had heard so much about you from him, so you can imagine how delighted I was to meet you at last.

We would dearly have loved to come to your aunt’s wedding, but because I haven’t been feeling too well, I’m afraid we will have to decline.

However, I know how delighted you will be when I explain the reason for my not feeling too good. Harry and I are expecting our first baby, due at the end of October.

I won’t mind whether it’s a boy or or a girl, but Harry aches for a son, so I’ll do my best to produce one for him.

I expect you know of Harry’s ambition to father at least two children, so if this one is a son for Harry, who knows, maybe the next one will be a girl for me?

I have formally answered your aunt’s kind invitation.

Harry sends his regards.

Yours affectionately, Susan

Mildred sat very still for what seemed an age, then she gave the letter back to Kitty. Peering over her spectacles, she murmured, “I didn’t realise how much you loved him. I do now, and I’m very sorry, Kitty. I know how you must feel.”

The letter felt like a ton weight in Kitty’s trembling fingers.

Carefully folding it, she replaced it into the envelope.

“I’m happy for them,” she said.

“Susan’s right. Harry always talked about having a family, a son.” She sent her mind back over the years, to the garden they played in as children, where they swung on the apple tree, and Harry pushed her too high and wouldn’t stop until she screamed. She recalled the very first kiss they had shared, and the way he had often talked of his future, his dreams and ambitions, and his intention to have a family of his own some day.

“A daughter with your lovely nature,” he said.

“And a son to run with, to play football with, a son who would look to his father for guidance. A son with your shining brown eyes, Kitty,” he had whispered, and her young heart had sung for joy.

All that was gone now. Another woman was carrying Harry’s son. Another woman, with hard blue eyes, and a jealous nature. But then she had every reason to be jealous. Harry was a man among men, strong and caring, with a smile that could brighten even the grey est morning.

“Will you write back?” Mildred enquired. There was nothing she could do but just be there. Sometimes life could be so cruel. Here was Kitty who had endured so much, forgiven those who had taken from her, befriending anyone who turned to her, and yet was still denied the happiness she deserved. Then there was herself, a selfish woman who had wronged this lovely girl, driven her own family away and drowned herself in booze and self-pity. If it hadn’t been for Kitty. Oh! She daren’t dwell too much on that. Especially now, when she had found Eddie, and happiness, and a whole new life. But she didn’t deserve it. Time and again she had told herself that. She did not deserve it. And now Kitty was dealt another blow, a blow that must have cut deep. But Kitty would not let it get her down. She always rose above life’s adversities. That was what made her so special.

“Of course I’ll write,” Kitty said.

“How could I not congratulate them on their wonderful news?” Even in her despair, a tide of joy swept through her, for Harry’s sake, and for that fortunate child who would have him for a father.

“You don’t have to be lonely, Kitty.” It was more a heartfelt plea than a statement.

“I’m not lonely,” Kitty lied.

“I’ve told you before, you’re not to worry about me.”

“Jack adores you. Why don’t you at least think about a life with him?”

Kitty gave her a warning look.

“You’re getting to be as stubborn as him. I won’t contemplate a life with Jack because I don’t love him. It wouldn’t be fair.”

“Love isn’t everything.”

Kitty didn’t answer straightaway. How could Mildred say that, when for these past months she had found a whole new meaning for living?

“Would you marry Eddie if you didn’t love him?” she asked simply.

Mildred’s eyes flickered. Unable to look Kitty in the face, she lowered her gaze.

“I have no right to tell you how you should live.”

“Neither has Jack … or Georgie,” Kitty said softly.

“But it doesn’t stop them from trying to run my life either.”

The smile in Kitty’s voice made Mildred look up. Relieved that she had been forgiven, she said, “It’s because we love you.”

“I know.” Desperate to change the subject, she observed, “You’ve got a good pile of correspondence there. Anything exciting?”

Filtering through the assortment of mail, Mildred drew a letter out.

“Here’s the reply from Susan Jenkins … not coming as she said.”

Quickly putting that to one side, she opened another.

“Oh, look! Miss Davis will be coming after all.” They had feared she might still be on her travels.

“That’s wonderful!” Kitty declared, her face wreathed in pleasure.

“It’ll be lovely seeing her again, and she’s bound to have so many stories to tell.”

All in all, there were twenty-two people coming to Mildred’s wedding;

most of the guests who had attended Kitty’s party and a number of Eddie’s relatives, none of whom Kitty knew.

Mildred saved the good news until last.

“You’ll be pleased to know that Georgie has answered at last, and yes, she’s decided to turn up after all.” The card from her was bent at the corners, crinkled and grubby.

Kitty read it and whooped for joy.

“I’ll strangle her!” she cried.

“Why hasn’t she replied to my letters? Why didn’t she let me know she was coming to the wedding, instead of just scribbling a card to you?”

Thrilled at Kitty’s change of mood, Mildred laughed.

“You should know what she’s like by now. I expect she’s playing her usual little tricks… wanting to keep you waiting and then surprise you at the last minute.”

Kitty agreed.

“You’re right. That’s exactly what she would do.” But now she would see her! Georgie was coming to the wedding after all!

Oh, she couldn’t wait to talk with her, to catch up on everything, to see for herself that Georgie had come to no harm.

There were tears of joy in her eyes as she told Mildred, “I was so worried about her. After she moved from Weymouth to Liverpool, she kept shifting about, going from one address to another. Honest to God, I was at my wit’s end.”

“Well, you can stop worrying now.” Taking off her spectacles, Mildred gathered the replies and took them to the bureau.

“We’ll have to check the seating plan,” she said thoughtfully, tapping a pen against her teeth.

“And don’t forget you’ve got another fitting for your dress.”

She would have gone on, but Kitty lured her into the kitchen with the promise of a slice of fruit cake and a mug of tea.

For the next half-hour they sat round the kitchen table, talking mainly about Kitty’s new home.

“Do you think you’ll be happy there?”

Mildred wanted to know.

“It’s fairly spacious,” Kitty replied.

“With two bedrooms … useful in case Georgie comes to stay. It overlooks the embankment and it’s closer to work. On a nice day I can walk to the boatyard, or even in winter if the buses aren’t running.”

Mildred recognised the ploy.

“I already know all that,”

she chided.

“What I asked was, will you be happy there?”

“I don’t see why not.” But she did see why not. She saw she would be alone again. She saw Harry would be miles away, with Susan and their child. As for Georgie, well, even at the best of times Kitty had little idea of where that will o’ the wisp might be. Would she be happy? Mildred had asked. Well, all she could do was try, and try she would. Even though her move from this house seemed to be a step back.

A step back to another time, when she saw little reason for getting up in the morning.

For the rest of the evening they chatted and laughed, and Kitty suppressed the ache inside. She was glad for Mildred, glad that she had found a man to love, a man who loved her too. And Georgie was coming to the wedding! Georgie! The idea that she and her friend would soon be together again was like a ray of sunshine reaching into a dark place.

For the next few days life was hectic. Jack gave Kitty time off to help her aunt, and Mildred left work two days earlier than planned.

There were numerous trips to the dressmaker’s, and even more to the many shoe shops in Bedford and Cambridge, where Mildred and Kitty searched far and wide for a pair of shoes that would slide painlessly over Mildred’s bunion.

“If I have to stand in that register office for any length of time, and then stomp about afterwards at the reception, I don’t want to be in agony,” She moaned.

“I expect I’ll have to dance as well, and there’s nothing worse than aching feet when you’re being swung round the floor.”

That tickled Kitty.

“You’re expecting a lot if you expect

Eddie to “swing” you round the floor! ” she remarked cheekily.

“There’s nothing wrong with a girl living in hope!” Mildred retorted with a wink. When she bent down to fasten her bootlace, the button on her skirt popped off and went spinning across the room. Too many cakes! ” Mildred said indignantly, and the pair of them creased up laughing.

The list of things to do seemed endless. There were flowers to arrange, clothes to be got ready, the honeymoon details to be gone over, and so much more that Mildred was afraid they would never be ready on time. On top of that, there were numerous visits to the solicitor who was dealing with the house sale. The buyers seem to think they can move in on the day we get married! ” Mildred complained.

“When they know very well the completion date is for the Monday after.

I can’t have them moving their stuff in here when you’re trying to move yours out. Besides, you’ll need to spend the Sunday here, so you can get the flat properly organised before you move in. ” After a particularly harrowing visit to the baker, who had mistakenly sold her cake but promised to have another ready on time, she threw herself into a chair and seemed close to tears.

“Calm down,” Kitty told her.

“If he says he’ll have your cake ready, I’m sure he will. Mr. Jackson has his reputation to think of, and you know how highly he values that. Everything will come out right in the end, you’ll see.”

Mildred wasn’t so sure, but Kitty was right. Come Friday evening, all was in order. Kitty took her out for a drink in the local pub, and they chatted until they were thrown out at closing time.

“I feel a bit merry,” Mildred giggled on the way home.

“Shame on you,” Kitty said.

“I don’t reckon Eddie knows what he’s letting himself in for!”

The rain started when they were halfway home, falling out of the skies as if God was emptying his bath. By the time they ran up the drive, they were like a pair of drowned rats.

“Where’s the key?” Kitty hunched her shoulders while the rain pelted from the guttering and ran down her neck.

“I thought you had it!” Mildred giggled. She fell up the steps and lay flat on her back.

“I’m pissed as a post!” she said, struggling to get up.

Feeling light-headed and happy from the wine, Kitty fumbled in Mildred’s pockets. When that didn’t produce the key, she searched her own. The key was nowhere to be found.

“It’s no good,” she decided in a fit of giggles, “I’ll have to get a ladder from the shed and try the bedroom window.”

“That’s no good,” Mildred told her.

“The shed’s locked and the key’s inside the house.”

“I reckon I’ll have to go to the police station then,” Kitty suggested. Sitting on the step beside her drunken aunt, who was still flat out on her back, she couldn’t help but giggle.

“Do you reckon we should ring the fire brigade?”

“Do what you like, as long as you don’t ask that cow next-door for help!” Mildred chuckled.