Loco Motive (7 page)

“Maybe that's good,” Joe said, retrieving his jacket from the peg in the hallway. “I'll take homemade anytime over the big bucks that rich parents around here spend on extravagant getups for their kids.”

Judith sighed. “I suppose. Renie never spent money on costumes for her kids. Every year she'd hand them each a white sheet and say, ‘There. You're a ghost. Have fun.'”

“For a graphic designer, she didn't have much imagination,” Joe remarked as they headed out the back door.

“She saved the good ideas to earn a living,” Judith said. She paused when they entered the garage and glanced at her luggage stacked in a corner. “We can leave that stuff here. The Joneses
always park in the driveway.” She grimaced. “I hope Renie's plan works. We're not allowing for any unexpected problems getting to the station.”

Joe didn't respond until they were both in the MG. “We'll be back by four-fifteen. Why not tell Renie to come a few minutes earlier?”

“I will,” Judith said, digging into her purse for the cell that always ended up at the very bottom of the bronze-toned hobo bag that had been a birthday gift from Joe's daughter, Caitlin.

Renie answered on the second ring. “I suppose we could leave a few minutes earlier,” she said. “Let me ask Bill. He's talking to Oscar.”

Judith groaned. “Please. I'm not in the mood for your fantasies about that stuffed monkey.”

“Ape,” Renie said emphatically. “Oscar is not a monkey. He's a dwarf ape, dammit. Unlike monkeys, they don't have tails.”

“Okay, okay.” Judith took a deep breath. “Just ask Bill. Please.”

“Fine.”

Judith waited impatiently for her cousin's response. Turning out of the cul-de-sac, Joe headed for Heraldsgate Avenue. “Well?”

“Renie's talking to Bill, who's talking to Oscar,” Judith said in disgust. “I can't hear what they're saying. It sounds muffled.”

Joe frowned. “I hope Oscar hasn't talked Bill into using my plane ticket.”

“Stop!” Judith glared at her husband. “Don't ever, ever buy into that bunk about Oscar. Or Clarence, the pampered dwarf lop bunny with an entire wardrobe, much of which he's eaten. Not to mention that they call their car Cammy because it's a Camry. One of these days they'll both go 'round the bend and give a name to their furnace.”

Joe didn't respond immediately. “It's not coal, so they couldn't use Stokely. If it's gas, then they—”

“Shut up,” Judith said between clenched teeth. “Renie's talking.”

“…so probably around four-twenty, okay?”

“Yes, great,” Judith replied. “See you then.” She clicked the phone off. “That's a relief. But I still have to tell the kids I'm leaving.”

“Tell them now,” Joe said, waiting at the four-way stop on the crest of the hill. “Here they come, right behind Wonder Woman and Batman and Robin.”

Sure enough, the red and silver boxes were bobbing and bouncing along in the crosswalk. “What am I supposed to do? Yell at them?”

“Why not? Traffic's so backed up on the avenue that we can't go more than five miles an hour. Get it over with.”

Judith shook her head. “No. There are so many people and so much noise that I probably couldn't get their attention. I'll wait until they get to Moonbeam's.”

Joe sighed. “Have it your way, but you're going to get one of your god-awful stress-induced headaches before they get that far.” The MG inched forward. “Too late. They went into the hardware store.”

“All the businesses offer some kind of treat,” Judith said. “Did you bring the camera?”

“Damn!” Joe glanced at Judith. “I thought you did.”

“No. I saw it…” She shook her head. “I don't remember. Maybe I'm thinking of the older one. I don't know how to use the digital camera I gave you for Christmas.”

“Never mind,” Joe said as they passed the bookstore. “I can take some pictures after the boys get home.”

“Okay.” Judith tried to enjoy the merchants' outdoor decorations that included artificial cobwebs, witches with steaming cauldrons, giant spiders, and life-size skeletons. It was a struggle to keep the tension headache at bay and ignore her stomach's version of the danse macabre.

At three-fifteen Joe dropped her off by Moonbeam's before he tried to find a parking place. After buying a hot cocoa and a latte, Judith went outside to find a vacant table. There weren't any, but
an older couple Judith recognized from Our Lady Star of the Sea motioned to her.

“Do sit with us. We SOTS have to stick together,” the sprightly older woman said, using the shortened acronym for parishioners. She nodded in the direction of a lanky teenager in a red suit with horns, tail, and a pitchfork. “Here comes the devil now.”

“Thanks, Mrs. Shaughnessy,” Judith said, recalling the couple's name. “My husband's parking the car. It's more crowded every year.”

Mr. Shaughnessy set his unlit pipe on the metal table. “When this started ten years ago, our grandchildren were teenagers. Now the eldest is married and has a baby girl. Ah!” He stood up. “I see Hannah. She's a pea pod in the checkered stroller with her mother and our grandson, Neal. Excuse us.”

Arm in arm, the Shaughnessys left to greet their offspring. Judith sipped her hot chocolate and watched the many-splendored costume wearers walk, weave, wobble, and whoop their way along the avenue. Glancing at her watch, she saw that it was after three-thirty. There was still no sign of Joe or the rest of the family. She sipped more cocoa and waved good-bye to the Shaughnessys as they walked across the street with the pea pod and her parents. The only distraction was the occasional neighbor, shopkeeper, or acquaintance. For once, she didn't try to make casual chitchat. There was less than an hour to go before the Empire Builder was due to leave the station.

At ten to four, Joe came puffing up from the alley behind Moonbeam's. “My God,” he gasped, bracing himself on the table, “I had to drive around forever to find a parking spot. It's a zoo around here, and I'm not talking about the lions, the tigers, the bears, and the oh-my-what-the-hell-are-theys.”

“Did you see our gang?” Judith asked.

“Often,” he replied, slumping into a chair. “They were going into Falstaff's about five minutes ago.”

“That's almost two blocks away,” Judith said in dismay. “Will
they get here by four or should we meet them at the grocery store?”

Joe shook his head. His face was more flushed than usual and his high forehead was damp with perspiration. “I don't know what to tell you.” He took a sip from his latte. “This sucker's cold.”

“Of course it is,” Judith said. “I bought it right after you dropped me off. What did you want me to do? Sit on it to warm it up?”

“Right, okay, I get it.” He used a paper napkin to wipe his forehead. “It's your call.”

Judith grimaced. “How far away did you park?”

“Halfway down the alley by the pub's Dumpster.”

“You've seen the kids,” Judith said after a brief pause. “I'll start out for Falstaff's and you can pick me up in the parking lot.”

Joe leaned back in the metal chair and expelled a big breath. “This is one hell of a holiday.” Before Judith could say anything, he grabbed the paper cups, plastic spoons, and napkins. “Go. I'll see you at Falstaff's.”

“Okay,” Judith said meekly as Joe stood up and went over to the already crammed trash bin by the curb. He had a right to be annoyed, she thought as she made her way across the street through a maze of costumed celebrants, one of whom was a grandfather clock with the hands pointing to midnight. A peek at her watch told her it was two minutes to four. Judith picked up the pace, ignoring a twinge or two from her artificial hip. By the time she reached the corner of the block where Falstaff's was located, she espied the red and silver boxes straggling behind Mike and Kristin.

“Hey, Ma,” Mike called. “We were just coming to see you.” Judith moved out of the way for a trio of boisterous pirates.

“Your father's picking me up in the parking lot,” she said, gesturing at the grocery store.

“I'm afraid I have to get home to—”

The red box tripped over his own feet and fell down. Kristin bent down as Mac let out a howl. “Can't you see where you're driving?” she asked. “Are you hurt?”

Mac's reply was drowned out by Joe-Joe's whining. “I'm tired! I don't feel good! My box is hot!”

“Now, now,” Kristin said as some of the other revelers paused to stare at the small spectacle, “don't be spoilsports. You're having fun.”

“I'm not!” Mac howled. “My foot hurts! It's broke!”

Joe-Joe tugged at Mike's pant leg. “Daddy! I wanna go home!”

“Me, too,” Mac said tearfully. “I have to wee-wee.”

“Ur-in-ate,” Kristin said sharply. “You're too old to talk like that. Come on, let your grandmother see how brave and strong you are.”

“It's okay, Kris,” Judith asserted. “They're tired and crabby. Maybe you should—”

A horn honked loudly. Judith recognized it at once as belonging to the MG. Joe had pulled up at the corner. “What's going on?”

Mike hurried over to the curb. “Mac hurt himself and Joe-Joe's worn out. Do you mind taking the boys home? We'll wait here with Ma.” He glanced at Judith. “She looks kind of pale.”

Joe leaned out the window to study his wife. “Are you okay?” Judith didn't answer. It was all she could do to keep from screaming at every member of her immediate family.

Kristin leaped into the breach. “The MG has no child safety seats. You know the boys can't go anywhere without them.” She paid no attention to her whining, moaning sons or the honking horns from other cars as their drivers tried to get by Joe and the MG. “Here's what we'll do,” Kristin went on. “Mike, you go with your dad to collect the Rover. I'll wait here. Your mom can help entertain the kids until you get back.”

Torn by her grandchildren's distress and the relentless march of time, Judith attempted to nudge her daughter-in-law out of the way. It was like trying to move a hundred-year-old Douglas fir. Ignoring Kristin's expression of curiosity, she countermanded the orders to Mike. “I'm going with you, Joe. You can drive the
Rover back here. There's room for everybody. Excuse me, Kris. Can you move so I can get in the MG?”

Kristin looked stunned. “I don't…well, I guess…”

“Move!” Judith shouted.

Kristin obeyed. “I love you all.” Judith cried, ignoring the squalls and the honks and the curious passersby. “I'm leaving town. Happy Halloween!”

If Mike and Kristin were shocked by her announcement, Judith didn't want to know. She was out of breath after she got into the bucket seat and felt her whole body sag.

“That was easy,” Joe said. “You see? All that fretting for nothing.”

“I feel guilty, though,” Judith admitted.

“Don't.” Joe had taken a detour to avoid the avenue by driving on side streets to Hillside Manor. “I'll be back for the kids in ten minutes.”

“I hope,” Judith said as they pulled into the cul-de-sac, “that Bill and Renie take the shortcut, too.”

“They will,” Joe assured her. “Bill knows what he's doing.” Judith sighed. “I hope Renie does.”

Joe drove straight into the garage. “You wait for them here. And let Bill carry your luggage.”

Joe and Judith got out of the MG. “See you Tuesday night,” he said, putting his arms around his wife. “Have a safe trip. And try to relax. I'll explain everything to Mike and Kristin.”

“Thanks.” Judith hugged and kissed Joe. “You, too.”

She watched Joe hurry to the Rover and get in. Just as he started the engine, Bill and Renie's Camry pulled into the cul-de-sac. Another glance at her watch told Judith it was four-seventeen. Joe called out something to Bill as the vehicles passed each other. A moment later the Camry came to a stop just in front of where Judith was standing.

“Chuga-chuga!” Renie shouted. “Woo-woo!”

Bill got out of the car. “Where's your luggage?”

Judith gestured to the corner of the garage where Joe had stashed the garment bag, the suitcase, and the carry-on. She waited to make sure Bill had everything before she opened the rear door. A loud “yoo-hoo!” caught her attention. Turning around, she saw Arlene Rankers on the back porch. “The first guests have checked in,” Arlene said. “Carl's playing cribbage with your mother. Everything's under control. Have fun! You'll love Baltimore.”

“It's Boston,” Judith called back.

Arlene shrugged. “They both begin with a
B
and they're on the East Coast. As far as I'm concerned, anything on the other side of the Mississippi is a bit peculiar. And old.” She blew Judith a kiss.

Bill closed the trunk and shouted his customary word to get going: “Boppin'!”

“What now?” Renie asked after Judith got into the backseat and Bill reversed out of the driveway. “Why is Joe driving the Rover? Don't tell me the MG finally died on him.”

“Oh, no,” Judith said, explaining the mayhem on top of the hill. “At least,” she concluded, “I may have showed my smug daughter-in-law that I'm not a total wuss.”

“Kristin hasn't learned that you have to choose your battlegrounds,” Renie said. “I hope Mike stands up to her—even if he is only an inch taller.” She winced and rubbed her neck. “I'd better stop trying to turn around to listen to you. I've got a kink.” She was silent for a moment. “Hey, Bill, why are we taking the via-duct to the station? It's the long way.”

“I'm checking for fishing boats out on the bay,” he replied as they traveled above the harbor's edge. “I only see a couple, but it's getting late. It turned out nice today. Look at the mountains over on the peninsula.”