Long Ride (Riding with Honor) (12 page)

“I’m sorry to hear that since I had hoped that all these things you’ve been doing for them these past few months was the start of you taking responsibility for all of them
,” Edna said.

“Tak
ing responsibility for them?” Becca sniffed.

“They are good men.  Every one of them is a little on the rowdy side but they are also honorable and I had thought you were woman enough to keep them in
check as much as possible and be their champion when you can’t make them toe the line,” Edna said. “I won’t be around forever and thinking I had you to pass the torch to, somehow made it easier to accept.”

“What are you talking about
, Edna?” she asked.

“My heart has ached every day I’ve been away from my Robert.  I loved that man more than you can imagine when he was alive and I love him still.  I think whatever higher power is out there knows I’ve suffered long enough without him
,” Edna said. “I’m dying, Becca.”

“Is there noth
ing more can be done for you?” she asked after several moments of stunned silence.

“
The doctors are buying me all the time they can but once this will is in place I’ll be all ready when the time comes,” Edna replied. “I don’t want any of them to know about it though… they will just spend the time I have left worrying about me.  I don’t want to be treated any differently.”

“Are you sure that is best?  Perhaps if you tell them now it will be easier for them when the
moment arrives.  Now is the time to say anything to them that needs said before…” she said.

“I will write them each a letter which I will send to you in the mail, to give them when the
day comes.  I have one of your business cards in my pocketbook.  As for what they want to tell me… I know they love me and that’s enough… always has been.  They don’t need to explain themselves to me,” Edna said, matter of fact.

“If that is what you want, I will see it done.  Please let me know if there is anything else you need
,” she said.

“I am fine and I still have
some
time left… just not as much,” Edna smiled and patted her hand. “The doctors haven’t given me a countdown yet.”

She sat quietly with Edna for a while before heading back to Dickie’s house to load up her belongings to head to the airport.  Upon pulling into the driveway she sat for a few minutes looking at the tiny little ranch style house.  It was about the size of her apartment in New York
, though not nearly as well furnished.  Yet it called to her heart in a way that neither her apartment nor even the beach house did.

Her feet felt full of lead as she trudged to the front door with her briefcase in hand.  Stepping inside she could hear the shower running.  Sitting down on the
sofa she thought back to the first night here and how she’d slept on the very edge of this couch.  Had she been in love with him even then?  Or at least falling for him?

She heard the bathroom door open after a few minutes and looking up her eyes
found him standing in the doorway in only a pair of jeans.  It felt as though her mind was capturing this image of him to look at in the months ahead while her heart tried to heal.  This time she would hurt because she truly loved this man, this wasn’t the pain of failure but success.  He had won her love but there was no prize only heartache at what would never be.

“Let me get dressed and we’ll go grab a bite to eat before heading to the airport
,” he said after several moments of simply watching her.

He was normally so good with people… reading their moods and getting them to talk to him about what they were thinking.  Becca was a whole other matter.  The sad set of her shoulders and puffy eyes indicated that she wasn’t eager to return to her home in New York. 

So why didn’t she go and stay in her beach house instead?  Or better yet, just stay here with him?  It was like she was resigned to the idea that what was between them was over… a thing of the past.

The hell it was over… he hated big cities and New York was
certainly no exception, but if he had to suffer the city to see her from time to time, he would. 

He would do his best not to smother her and give her the space and freedom to make her own choices where he was concerned but it would likely kill him in the meantime. 

He had considered the idea of moving nearer to her but somehow just couldn’t seem to get past the idea of leaving the guys in such a permanent way.  These people were his family…
his life
… and leaving them behind would simply be trading one love for another. 

From what he could tell there was only Becca and her brother Greg in New York and according to Meredith there had been some sparks between Greg and Carla so it just made more sense for
Becca to come to him. 

Perhaps he was being greedy and wanting things his way.  He would compromise with her if it helped the situation but the idea of leaving this town… leaving his family just didn’t seem like an option.  He would have to be content with seeing her when he could
, though the idea threatened to cut his heart from his chest.

Dinner was unusually quiet between them… each person lost in thought and the beginning of heartache.  He said goodbye to her at the security checkpoint rather than following her to the loading gate.  He forced himself to walk away and not look back, because if he looked back he feared he wouldn’t be able to let her go.

The drive back home was unusually lonely and he realized he would miss the companionship with her the most.  She had promised that she would return to advocate on behalf of Mara and Emma, his little neighbor girls he’d cared for before their parents were locked up. 

Once he
had his DNA collected and sent off for testing she’d sworn he would be the first to know of the results.  He knew Chuck had given her schematics for the parts Bobby had designed and she would be drawing up the paperwork for the patents. 

She had also told him about Tommy and Dana potentially taking on yet another of Casey’s children to make sure the kids all stayed together.  He also knew she had something going on with Carla Johnson though he didn’t know much about that and she wasn’t ready to share. 

The only bad part about her work with the guys at the shop was that the majority of it could be done from her office in New York, and minus any actual court appearances, she had no reason to stay in Florida. 

He spent the longest night of his life and by 4AM he completely understood
Becca’s willingness to medicate herself in order to sleep.  His mind would not settle and he felt as though he should be with her… wherever she was. 

She was safe now
… Greg had seen to that and his heart would have to adjust to not holding her close while his mind and body slept.  How had he gotten so addicted to her in such a short time?

She had spent the majority of the flight in tears.  Her heart had stayed behind in Florida with him.  Any attempts to work from her briefcase
were futile. 

She looked over
the cases for the guys at the shop and the couple of cases she still had outstanding in New York but was just unable to focus as her mind returned again and again to Dickie.  As she exited the plane and collected her baggage she found Greg waiting at the entrance to the airport.

“Hey
, sis… how was the flight?” Greg asked, taking her bag from her as she approached him.

“Long and cramped
,” she replied.

He studied her for a minute before leading the way outside to the car.  He loaded her bags in the trunk and then got behind the wheel and glanced over to where she sat looking out the window.  She realized her heartache must be displayed on her face for the entire world to see but she couldn’t seem to control her emotions at the moment. 
Out of control…

Upon arriving at her apartment building
they rode up in the elevator and she could feel the awkward silence like a cloak wrapping tighter and tighter around her.  Obviously Greg felt it too but was unsure how to approach the emotional wreck his sister seemed to be at the moment.

“You must be tired from all this added stress and then the flight…” Greg tried.

“Yea,” was all she could offer.

He unlocked her apartment and swung the door open only to let out a loud whisper
, “Shit!”

Looking around Greg’s broad shoulders she peered inside at the complete chaos of a ransacked apartment. 
Great!
  This was just what she needed to come home to… a mess.  As if her emotions weren’t a big enough mess as it was.

Two weeks had passed since she’d arrived back in New York and she was tired to the point of exhaustion.  The few nights she’d spent in Dickie’s arms had
served as a reminder to her body and mind of what it was like to sleep peacefully. 

She had thought that with
Roger being behind bars and no longer a threat to her, she would again settle in and get at least four or five hours of sleep a night.  Apparently that was not the case and the only drug that enabled her to get any real rest was
him
.

She had spoken to
Dickie that night upon arriving home and finding her apartment in shambles.  He had made her promise to call him and let him know she’d arrived safely and so she had. 

Before hanging up he had asked her to call him from time to time and let him know how she was.  However, simply hearing his voice had unleashed a fresh onslaught of raw emotions she had been unwilling to repeat since.

Staring at the envelope in her hand from the DNA testing facility, she took a deep breath steeling herself for the results of Dickie’s paternity test.  Tearing it open, she removed the paper, set aside the satisfaction survey and then looked at the actual test results. 

She had known in her soul upon seeing Chuck’s birthdate and then comparing their similarities that he was Dickie’s son
.  The document she held confirmed that notion. 
Now to tell them both…

Somehow telling either one of them by phone
was too cold… too uncaring.  This was information that should be given in person, no matter that seeing him again in person, would simply tear open her heart all over again.  That decision made, she called and booked a flight for the next day and then phoned Greg.

“Hey
, sis… what’s up?” he answered.

“I’ll be flying to Florida in the morning.  I have received some information
for a case I was working on down there and need to go back and finish it up,” she said.

“So you lied to me… you
were
working while you were down there,” he teased.

“What was I supposed to do while I was down there, sit on my thumbs
and wait for rescue?” she asked.

“I suppose not.  So are you going to be st
aying down there for a while?” he asked in return.

“Just for a few days and then I’ll be home
.  I figure I might as well try to wrap up some of the other work I have going on down there,” she replied.

She had
received a balance settlement statement on Carla’s house from the mortgage company and forwarded Chuck the process on how to pay off the house per his request. 

He had done so and the bank had told him that they would send the satisfaction of mortgage paperwork to Carla.  What she wouldn’t have given to be a fly on the wall when the young man went in to pay off the loan…
in cash.  Odds were they thought he was there to rob the place with his gang tattoos.

Once he had paid off the loan he had called asking if she would call and tell Carla about the house.  She had to giggle at the young man’s nervousness over Carla’s reaction.  Meredith had insisted that he take care of telling Carla on his own. 

Though she understood that Meredith was trying to help Chuck learn to communicate in a family environment, she still felt bad for him and had agreed to do a conference call with him and Carla.  Now it seemed she would be down there anyways and could arrange a face to face confession for him instead.

“You need a ride to the airport?”
Greg asked.

“No
, I’ll catch a cab.  I just wanted you to know what my travel plans were so you didn’t worry,” she replied.

“I appreciate it and I know you’ve nearly worn yourself out working since you’ve been back.  Maybe you
should
spend a little time down there… rest up a bit before you come back,” he suggested.

Certainly not.
  Sleeping next to Dickie had been the only time in more than a decade that she had slept a full night without waking.  As much as she needed sleep, being wrapped in his warm embrace wasn’t going to happen… her heart couldn’t take having to leave those strong arms yet again. 

Hell… two weeks later she still hurt so
badly from leaving, she actually had thoughts of selling her shares in the firm to the other attorneys and retiring. 

She had been shocked the first time that thought had crossed her mind… the firm had been the bricks she’d used to build up her defensive wall.  She couldn’t give that up…
could she?

“I need to go… I have a million things to wrap up here in the office and I still need to pack.  I’ll call you when I arrive down there and before I head back
,” she said.

“Ok… bye
, sis,” he said and then disconnected the call.

God help her but the excitement racing through her blood at being able to
just
see
him again made it next to impossible to focus on anything.  She even had to have one of the paralegals verify she had the patent paperwork correct.  She would take it with her and get Bobby’s signature. 

She hadn’t heard anything from Dana or Tommy about the new baby but fully intended to visit them during her trip to see if they were any closer to making a decision.  They tended to take things a little slower than the other members of the group.

Chuck had voluntarily told her that Dickie had begun his required hours of parenting classes and foster training.  She had sent a letter of intent to Carmen on behalf of Dickie without even checking with him first, stating that he had a vested interest in fostering both girls. 

The letter had went on to say that she expected the placement to happen since it would reunite the siblings who were currently separated and therefore was in the best interest of the children.  She also intended to try and meet with Carmen to see where things were headed regarding the departments opinion on placing the girls with him.

She wanted to run by the art gallery to see the painting of Meredith before heading home to pack.  She had meant to go by the gallery well before now but just hadn’t had the heart… it would be a fresh reminder of how much she missed the rowdy group of bikers. 

Now there was no reason not to go and look at the piece of art that was proudly displayed as the main attraction for the gallery… the very piece that was never meant to be seen by the public eye.
 

Stepping outside
of her office building she walked toward a deli to grab a sandwich before heading to the gallery.  Sitting down at the small table she looked at the meal she had purchased and her mind took her back to the day Dickie had saved her.  The sandwich he had made for her splattered all over the floor of his room was etched in her mind and she felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up…
much like that day.

She casually looked over her shoulder and found a man staring at her.  He wore a business suit complete with tie and overcoat.  He had grey hair and dark eyes with a scar that went along one side of his face. 

He was talking on his cell phone with a serious look on his face and had just received his order.  Upon catching her gaze he smiled flirtatiously at her and walked over to where she sat, disconnecting his call as he approached.

“Hi, it’s a little crowded in here today… would you mind if I
sat here with you?” he asked.

Yes she minded
… though he was attractive he wasn’t Dickie… and her nerves immediately stood at attention.  Something about him made her even more skeptical than normal.  He stood at her table waiting patiently for an answer.

“I suppose
,” she finally acquiesced. 

After seating himself
, he removed his overcoat to make himself comfortable.  Then he smiled and said, “You work nearby?”

“Yes… just up the block
,” she replied cautiously.

“Sorry… just making conversation.  I
recently relocated here, and come from a close knit community so I’m still learning to mind my own business,” he smiled reassuringly.  He took a bite of his sandwich while she tried to relax.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean…” s
he tried to cover her rudeness.

“No need to apologize.  I was being a little forward I suppose… you’re quite pretty so I’m sure you probably get inundated with bad pick-up lines all the time.  My name’s John by the way
,” he said and then took another bite.

“
No, I don’t get inundated with anything,” she said. 

He looked at her curiously for a minute and after swallowing said
, “Well either way… I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.  Your husband or boyfriend is a lucky guy,” he finished.

“I’m single
,” she replied. 
Stupid!

He smiled fully at her confession
. “I’m surprised at that… perhaps lady luck has finally decided to smile upon
me
.  I have an extra ticket to the Metropolitan Opera House for tomorrow evening… would you be interested in joining me?” he asked.

“Actually I am heading out of state on business tomorrow morning…
Florida,” she offered as an excuse. 
Why oh why couldn’t she just shut up?

“We
ll perhaps upon your return…?” he smiled graciously.

“I have a vacation home
near the beach and will be spending some time there so I’m not sure when I will be returning to the city,” she replied. 
She might as well have invited him to break in to her apartment while she was gone and rob her blind.

He smiled and they sat quietly eating and upon finishing his lunch h
e excused himself and left the deli.  She watched him walk down the sidewalk until he disappeared from sight.  When he was no longer visible she relaxed and the anxiety she felt slowly disappeared.  She cleaned up the table and headed outside to catch a cab to the gallery.

Stepping inside the gallery
, she walked to the roped off area where Chuck’s painting was being displayed.  Nathan Patterson had been correct when he said that the paintings done with emotions and that came from Chuck’s heart were worthy of the history books.  The painting left her with a feeling of intimacy she’d only ever felt once in her life…
with Dickie.

Glancing around she realized just what kind of talent Chuck really had… his art spoke to people from all walks of life.  Young and old alike stood looking at what only she realized was of a young woman in love.  The woman’s love was only superseded by the love the painter had for the model.  The piece was beautiful
, like the soul that had created it.

“The buzz for this piece builds daily
,” Daniel said from behind her. “Have you spoken to him about any more pieces of this caliber?”

“I will be heading back down there for a few days… I will talk with him again and see what I can do
,” she replied.

“We are receiving offers on it
of nearly half a million and it seems that the value of the piece has not yet reached its ceiling,” Daniel said. “These types of pieces could make him an
extremely
wealthy man…”

Chuck’s heart understood more than some of the wisest men… but what Chuck didn’t understand was wealth or what to do with it.  It was evident that Daniel could not
comprehend why Chuck wasn’t willing to move to New York and paint exclusively… become fabulously wealthy and have all the material things that had been denied him all of his young life.  As little as he had grown up with, growing up without a family… being without love and acceptance had been the most unbearable for him. 

Chuck had found that love and acceptance with
a rag tag bunch of bikers and she was now tasked with changing his perception of one of his family members.  The heaviness of that task followed her back to her apartment and stayed with her while she packed and while she
didn’t
sleep.  Her overactive mind and her frustration at being unable to calm it drove her from her bed at 5AM when she headed to the coffee maker.

“
No… the coffee, not me… how do you take your coffee?”

It seemed nothing kept thoughts of him at bay… not even worrying about Chuck’s reaction to the news she would bring with her.  She was showered, dressed, packed and ready to go well in advance of the time she needed to leave for the airport and decided to call Chuck
to set up a time to meet with him and Carla.

“Hey Chuck… I’m catching a flight to Florida this morning and wondered if you wanted to have that talk with Carla thi
s evening when I get in town?” she asked.

“I’m sweating like a whore in church
, but yea… might as well get it over with,” was his reply after several minutes of contemplative silence.

“If you wait much longer she might receive the paperwork from the bank before you get a chance to tell her
,” she warned.

“W
ill you be in by dinner time?” he asked. “It’s my night to cook so if you can come for dinner we could talk about it then.  Maybe around six o’clock?”