Love, Always, Promise [Wolf Creek Pack 5] (7 page)

He took the bottle from Ethan. Just the thought of rubbing anything on Ethan certainly increased his swelling. He just hoped he would be able to hide it from Ethan. From the little smirk on Ethan’s face, he didn’t think he did a very good job of it, though.

“How do you want to do this?” he asked, almost swallowing his tongue when Ethan just raised an eyebrow at him. “I mean, how do you—”

“It’s easiest if I just lie down on the bed and you straddle my legs. Just remember not to push too hard or it will hurt,” Ethan said as he turned around and carefully climbed onto the bed, lying down on his stomach.

Jace stared down at him, gritting his teeth as he took in all the smooth skin beneath him. Even with Ethan looking thinner, due to his injury and time in the hospital Jace assumed, he was still the sexiest man Jace ever saw. And he was supposed to rub lotion on him?

Oh hell!

“Well?” Ethan asked as he turned his head to look up at him. “Are you going to help me, or do I need to call Nate in here?”

“No, I’ll do it,” Jace said as he climbed onto the bed and straddled Ethan’s legs. Oh damn, Ethan’s perfect little ass was right in front of him. Jace could feel his cock throbbing against his zipper, wanting out, wanting to get to that perfect little ass.

He took a deep breath and flipped the lotion open, squirting some onto his hands before closing the bottle and dropping it on the bed next to him. Rubbing his hands together to warm up the lotion, he began rubbing it into Ethan’s back, careful to avoid going too low.

But apparently, Ethan was having none of that. He moved his hands down and pushed the edge of his boxers down to just above the soft curve of his ass cheeks. “You need to rub it in a little lower where the injury is.”

“What exactly happened, Ethan?” Jace asked as he rubbed lower. Ethan was so quiet, Jace wondered if he would answer him. But then he felt him take a deep breath and heard him start talking.

“My injured is to the L3 vertebra on my spinal cord, or Lumbar vertebra, which is connected to the nerves in my leg, specifically the ones in my thighs. That’s why I have to use the crutches to get around. My legs don’t always do what I want them to do.”

“Will you always have to use them?”

Ethan shrugged. “I don’t know, maybe. The doctors at the hospital told me I would never walk again, and they were wrong about that, so…”

Jace dropped his head down into the middle of Ethan’s back, overcome by his feelings of guilt. “I’m so sorry, sweetness. I never meant to hurt you. Please, believe me. I wouldn’t hurt you for anything in the world.”

He sat up when Ethan pushed back against him, lifting himself up as Ethan rolled over onto his back. He just knew Ethan would berate him again, tell him what he already knew, that he was a horrible person.

“Tell me about the silver poisoning,” Ethan said as he settled down onto his back, looking up at him curiously. Only at that moment did Jace realized that Ethan listened in on his conversation with Joe.

“Let’s get you tucked in, and then I’ll tell you,” Jace said as he rolled off of Ethan to the side of the bed. “Do you need to visit the bathroom or anything?”

Ethan nodded. He rolled over to the side of the bed and reached for his crutches. Jace leaned down and lifted Ethan up into his arms, carrying him to the bathroom. He carefully set him on his feet before stepping out and closing the door.

He leaned his head against the cool wood while he waited for Ethan to take care of business, jumping when the door pulled open. Ethan gave him a little embarrassed smile, holding out his arms.

Jace grinned back. He swept Ethan into his arms again and carried him back to bed. He pulled the covers back and laid him down before covering him back up. He started to sit down on the side of the bed when Ethan flipped the covers back, looking at him expectantly.

“Oh, Ethan, this isn’t a good idea.”

Sighing deeply, Jace slowly unbuttoned his shirt in case Ethan wanted to protest. Jace watched Ethan carefully and searched for any sign of discomfort from the man. When none came, he draped the shirt over a nearby chair. Jace pushed his boots off his feet then his socks before kneeling on the side of the bed.

“Aren’t you going to take your jeans off?” Ethan asked.

“Uh, Ethan, I’m not wearing anything under my jeans,” Jace said, feeling his face heat up.

Ethan just smirked, closing his eyes. “I won’t look, I promise.”

Jace looked at Ethan for a moment before quickly unzipping his jeans and pushing them off his legs. He jumped into the bed so quickly Ethan giggled, rolling against him. He came to rest with his face in Jace’s chest, his legs pressed against the side of Jace’s.

Jace inhaled swiftly at the feel of Ethan’s body pressed against his. Why couldn’t he have discovered this before he fucked it all up? Ethan felt wonderful pressed against his body, the soft feel of his skin heating every spot he touched.

Ethan just scooted up until his head lay on Jace’s arm. He placed a hand hesitantly against Jace’s chest. “Okay, so I’m all tucked up in bed. Now, tell me.”

Jace took in a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “A few days before we met, my brother and a few of his friends tried to kill me using silver knives. He wanted to be the next in line for the alpha position. I defended myself but came away from it with silver poisoning.”

“Your brother tired to kill you?” Ethan whispered. Jace could hear the disgust in his voice at the thought.

“Things are different where I come from, Ethan. It’s a constant fight for ranking, for position in the pack. In a sense, it’s dog eat dog.”

“My God!” Ethan exclaimed.

He brought his arm up, patting Ethan on the shoulder. “It’s okay, Ethan. He has no reason to come after me now. I gave up my ranking in the pack to him. He can have it and all of the crap that goes with it.”

“You gave up being the next alpha? Why on earth would you do that?” Ethan asked. The shock clearly showed on Ethan’s face as he looked up at Jace.

Jace shrugged his shoulders. “It seemed like the thing to do at the time.” He couldn’t very well tell Ethan that he gave up being the next alpha to be with him, not when Ethan didn’t want him anymore. He didn’t want Ethan to feel bad.

“So, what does all of this have to do with me?”

“Oh, sweetness, I wish it didn’t have anything to do with you, but it does. The night that I claimed you, I suffered from the silver poisoning.”

“Are you saying that if you hadn’t been poisoned you never would have claimed me?” Ethan whispered.

“God, no! I’m not saying that at all, Ethan. It’s just the reason I don’t remember it. There’s actually about a week there I don’t remember a thing. I remember arriving in town, then nothing until I woke up in my bed at home.”

“So, you were serious when you said that you didn’t know me that day?”

Jace nodded. “I’m sorry, Ethan. I wish I did.”

“You really don’t remember claiming me?”

Jace could hear such sadness in Ethan’s voice that it made his eyes water. “I know I did. I know that you’re my mate, but no, I don’t remember it.”

He lifted an eyebrow in query when Ethan began to laugh. He laughed so hard that he tears streamed down his face. Jace started to become concerned at the bitter sound in his laughter. When Ethan finally quieted down, he laid his head back down on Jace’s chest. He could feel Ethan’s tears continue to fall on his skin even after the laughter stopped.

“I saved myself for you, did you know that? I wanted my first time to be with my mate, I wanted it to be special. How stupid was that? You don’t even remember it,” Ethan cried. His hand tightened into a fist on Jace’s chest.

It took everything in Jace to keep from crying right along with Ethan. He claimed him, took his virginity, and he didn’t even remember it. He would give almost anything to remember just a little of it.

“I’m sorry, Ethan. You don’t know how much I wish that I did remember it. It should have been a special time for both of us. At least you have the memory, though. I know I claimed you, but I don’t remember anything about it. I don’t know if I ever will.”

Jace reached down to pat Ethan’s hand when he sniffled. Ethan turned his hand, holding onto his. “It was nice.”

“Did I—was I good to you?” Jace asked hesitantly.

Oh, thank God!

Jace would be devastated if he hadn’t made Ethan’s first time enjoyable. He might not remember it, but Ethan did. Jace consoled himself with the knowledge that he gave Ethan something good to remember.

“Did I hurt you? Then I mean, not later.”

“No, you didn’t hurt me.”

At least he had that. If he was only going to have that one time with Ethan, at least he made it good for him. “I’m glad, Ethan.”

“Maybe I’ll tell you about it some time,” Ethan murmured.

Jace tilted his head up to look down at Ethan. Was he serious? First off, the idea of Ethan describing their first time together excited him beyond belief. Second, that Ethan even considered that they might see each other again, well that just made Jace want to kiss him all over.

“You must have really thought I was a complete nutcase that day in my apartment.” Ethan chuckled.

“I didn’t know what to think, Ethan. I know I didn’t like the way Joe talked to you, but I didn’t understand why. I also thought you looked like the sexiest damn thing I ever saw,” Jace replied.

“Then I opened my mouth.”

“You did surprise me, that’s for sure. I was positive I never met you. It wasn’t until Joe started talking to me and then Nate did his little thing that I realized there might be something to what you said.”

“Why did you leave me, then?”

“I needed time to think. I was raised my entire life knowing exactly where my life was going. I was next in line for alpha. I never even considered another life. You kind of threw me for a loop.”

“I wouldn’t have kept you from being alpha, Jace. Surely you know that.”

“You wouldn’t have, but being mated to you would. My father doesn’t tolerate anyone being in a same sex relationship. Neither do most of my pack. If I mated you, I couldn’t be alpha.”

Ethan was silent for a moment, but when he began to speak, his voice sounded so quiet, Jace needed to lean down to hear him. “I’m sorry, Jace. If you want to go, I’ll understand.”

“I’m not, Ethan,” Jace assured him as he squeezed his hand. “I can think of no other place I’d rather be than right here with you.”

“You don’t want to be your pack alpha?” Ethan sounded skeptical. Jace couldn’t blame the man. What wolf didn’t want to be alpha of his own pack, well, besides him?

Jace shook his head. “No, I never wanted it. It was just expected since before I can remember. I’ve always wanted to own a horse ranch. What about you?”

Ethan shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. I guess I’ve never really thought about it.”

“What do you think about horses? Do you like them?” Jace asked, mentally crossing his fingers.

“I’ve never really been around them. Why?” Ethan asked curiously, looking up at Jace.

“I thought maybe we’d buy a ranch or something, if you wanted. I can teach you anything you don’t know about horses,” Jace assured him, wondering if he stepped over the line with Ethan. He didn’t say he would let Jace stick around, but he didn’t say he couldn’t.

“Could we get a dog?”

Yes!
Jace silently yelled to himself.

“What kind of dog do you want?” he asked instead.

“I don’t know. I’ve just never had a dog, and I’ve always wanted one,” Ethan said, shrugging his shoulders.

“How about we get one after we find a house? Nate said that he already has a place he wants to show us tomorrow.”

Jace lay there with Ethan in his arms. He wondered how Ethan could possibly be so forgiving of him after everything he did. He probably would be yelling and screaming, but Ethan just wanted to know if he could get a dog. How in the hell did he ever get so lucky?

“Will I get to stay when you bring your wife home?” Ethan asked hesitantly.

“Ethan, I’m not married,” Jace replied, confused.

“Not now, but you will be some day.”

“Who do you think I’m going to marry?” Jace asked, tilting his head to look down at Ethan again.

He watched Ethan drop his eyes as he shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, but you won’t be single forever.”

“Ethan, I’m not single now.” Surely Ethan understood that. They were mated. That meant he wasn’t going to be with anyone else but Ethan.

“But you said you weren’t married.”`

“I’m not, but I’m mated to you, Ethan. That means I’m not single,” Jace reasoned.

“I know that, but you can’t go your entire life without sex. You’re going to find someone someday. You’ll probably want to get married and have kids. I just need to know where I stand once you bring her home.”

His whole life without sex? Did that mean Ethan didn’t want to be with him again? Did he screw things up that badly between them? Jace almost laughed. Of course he did. Why would Ethan want to consider being intimate with him after what he did to him?

“You never have to leave, Ethan. Wherever I have a home, you do, too,” Jace said as he tried to hold back his tears. “And I will never bring anyone else into our home.”

“Then—then you’ll set up two homes?”

Ethan’s voice seemed to be filled with confusion. Jace really didn’t want to discuss this with him. If he put it into words, it made it more real. He would much rather pretend that it would never happen.

“No, sweetness. Our home will always be my only home. I would never do that to you.”

“I understand, just—please, if we’re going to be living together, don’t bring them home. I know I have to share you, but I would really prefer that you don’t bring them home. Maybe you could get an apartment in town for that or something?”

Jace scooted up against the headboard, staring down at Ethan. “Who is
they
, Ethan? Who do you think I’ll be bringing home?”

“Your lady friends,” Ethan said, like it was a done deal.

“What lady friends?”

Ethan shrugged, his face turning a little red. “Whoever you go to for—well, you know.”