Love Locked Down (3 page)

I was shy but I was damn near wondering how much I could make if I swung from somebodies pole for a few weeks. Yes, I was just that desperate.

“ Dana, are you nervous girl? I see you looking around all scared and shit!” Tamera said snickering.

“ Hell yeah! I've never been to see anyone in jail before. I really don't know why I'm here today. I know you and your brother are really close. Your visits with him always seem really private. I'm confused as to why I'm here with you today after almost two years of knowing you. You've never asked me to come before. What the hell is going on Tamera?” I asked.

“ Well about that...,” Tamera said clearing her throat “... the reason I insisted you come with me today was because I plan on asking my brother to loan you the money to pay your tuition.”

“WHAT?”

“ Bitch shut up before you get us put out this muthafucka! You heard me! You need it and I know he has it. So what's it going to hurt for us to ask him? It ain't like he's using it in here right? My brothers cool but he ain’t
that
cool if you know what I mean. I know he's going to have to look you in your face and meet you for him to even consider it. So don't start tripping on me now. This is our only option. I think if you had someone else to ask you would have done it already wouldn't you? Stay cool and use your feminine wiles on a nigga. At the end of the day he is just a man and he's been locked up over a year...,” Tamera paused. “.... wait a minute, with your ol' innocent ass. Dana please tell me you know how to string a nigga out.” Tamera asked cutting her eyes at me.

“ String a nigga out? What is that? I....,”

“ Bitch flirt! Please say you know how to at least
flirt
with a man. Lord have mercy. You should have just been born ugly. A bitch like you was born with all those looks and it's gone to waste on you.” Tamera said sucking her teeth.

My lips snapped shut. Shit. Would he actually help me? Flirt with him? I didn't even know him!
I can't ask no strange ass man for eight thousand dollars. Can I?
I'd never spoken or laid eyes on the guy at all outside of a few older pictures Tamera had shared with me..
I can't believe Tamera has me here at the prison asking for money from a dude that's locked up!

I groaned inside.
How desperate can I be? Evidently VERY desperate. Bitch you was just thinking about stripping!

The room was crowded with kids,older people who I imagined were parents of the men locked up here and numerous women. So many women. The air stank of cheap perfume. Some women were wearing the absolute shortest skirts they could get away with in an effort to give their men some eye-candy to look at during the visit. All of a sudden the room got louder as the inmates started entering the room and looking for their loved ones. Tamera had insisted we get a particular table she liked near the window. It was slightly away from the others and afforded us a little more privacy. If you could actually call anywhere in a prison private.

“There he is!” Tamera cried jumping up excitedly “ Terrence! Over here!” she whisper-yelled waving her hands.

I looked over to where Tamera was waving and almost had a heart-attack on the spot. I swear on a stack of bibles my damn knees buckled.

DAMN! Get it together bitch,
I thought to myself trying to quickly regain my composure before anyone noticed I'd ever lost it.

I guess all the fine men are in jail. Shit I didn't want to believe it. I thought it was a damn lie they were telling on black men but by the looks of the men in this visiting room alone and the man standing in my face...it's true. Terrence walked towards us with what I could only describe as swagger. He must have been 6'4, he was wearing the same orange outfit as everyone else but how can someone make a jailhouse uniform look so damn good ? All I could see were his muscular arms but his body looked massive. Not in an overdone body builder type of why but solid and thick. Where Tamera had a peanut butter brown complexion,Terrence was a deep smooth chocolate,his hair was cut low and tapered all around. As he got even closer I could then see he was the very male and masculine version of his sister.

The same deep-set dark brown eyes framed by the longest,thickest lashes I'd ever seen on a man. His eyes were framed by thick naturally sculpted brows. My eyes scanned his face until they landed on a pair of full defined lips.
Damn! I wonder what that mouth do?
I caught myself wondering.
Jesus Christ what in the hell am I thinking?
Completing his face as if it was the prized cherry on the top of a sundae was a slight cleft in his chin.
Lord have mercy on my soul! My friends jailbird brother- who I need to ask for money from is fine as hell!

Terrence then had the nerve to smile and hug Tamera and two deep dimples jumped out at me. OH MY GOD!

The room suddenly felt hot to me. Damn, it was the dead of winter but I was sweating. This January heat was no joke!

“ Nice to meet you. I'm Terrence.” a deep,sexy baritone voice said jolting me out of my silent but thorough assessment of my friends brother. Instead of being in prison his ass needed to be on someones damn magazine cover. Modeling my designs. I wonder if he models?

“ Hello it's nice to finally meet you.” I said smiling trying my best not stare too hard. It was hard...
damn
hard not too!

“ Likewise. It's nice to to finally meet you after hearing so much about you over the last year. ” Terrence said trying not to look at his sister's friend too hard but it he was finding it difficult. The few pictures Terrence had seen of her did not do justice to the sista who was sitting in front of him at that very moment. Yes she was pretty in the pictures but the woman sitting in front of him right now was drop dead fucking gorgeous. She had the most beautiful eyes he'd ever seen.
Damn. Is she finer to me because I haven't had a woman in a while? Nah fuck that, her ass is just fine.

Tamera wasn't stupid by any means. She could see the sparks flying between her brother and her best-friend right away.
This is perfect. Hell this may make it easier for him to help her but I wont say it's a done deal yet
. Tamera knew all too well how Terrence handled his money and his women. Through the years she'd befriended many girls who played at being her friend in order to get next to her brother Terrence.

“ Dana could you do me a favor and grab us some drinks from the vending machine please. I want a Coke, Terrence, a Sprite right?” Tamera asked.

“Yeah.” Terrence answered unable to take his eyes off Dana as she gathered her purse and walked to the vending machine area. Terrence noticed several male sets of eyes on her as well. For some reason it bothered him having the other men in the visiting area looking at her. Thirsty ass niggas.
Let me not be too hard on them, some of these niggas ain't touched a woman in decades,
Terrence quickly thought.
This Dana chick is wearing the hell outta those jeans,
he thought watching her walk towards the vending machines.

* * * *

“ S
o what is this little visit with your friend about Tamera? I know something is up.  I've been trying to figure it out all week. What's really going on?”

“ Terrence first of all please,
please
don't be angry at her or me. All I did was tell Dana I wanted her to come with me today. She had no idea why I wanted her to come with me until right before you walked in. Since I know we don't have a lot of time and I couldn't say anything over the phone ...you know they be listening to our shit. Can Dana borrow eight thousand dollars for her school tuition?” Tamera quickly asked.

“ You brought your friend who I don't even know here to ask me for eight g's? Why the fuck would I give her eight grand? She's fine but that ain’t my woman. Where are her parents? Why the hell can't her family help her?”

“ Terrence don't be like that I know you have it ...,”

“ Hold the fuck up. Tamera you're my sister and I love you but don't you ever fucking presume to know what I have or don't have. As far as you know I ain't got shit but what I give you. That's all the money I have and you take it from me faithfully every month. You willing to give it back so I can pay your friends bills? My money ain’t none of your damn business. All you need to know is that I take care of you and every financial need you have. I do it because I love you not because I'm obligated to do shit for you. I'm your brother not your man or your father. So you lucky you ain’t out here having to work and go to school at the same time.” I said hotly. I didn't want to totally go off on her and call any unwanted attention to us.

Money was one topic that had been steady on my mind since I'd been locked up. It was stressful maintaining my lifestyle behind bars. Shit I had things going on that my family knew nothing about. And I wanted it like that. This stint in jail had let me know beyond a shadow of a doubt that behind prison walls was was a place I never wanted to be again. Once I was released, I was walking away from the negative lifestyle I'd been living. Slowly but surely. The mere thought that my sister was sitting on the outside counting my money for me had me seeing red.

Tamera hung her head in shame. Terrence was right. He'd always taken care of her and their mom. If it wasn't for him she'd be standing in Dana's shoes or worse. She had no right asking him to take on anyone else's burdens. When in all actuality she was one of his burdens before he was even a man. Even though he'd never say it. Right down to the fact he was sitting in prison right now for protecting her. Terrence had warned her to stay away from Cordell and she hadn't listened. When he became violent and began stalking her just like Terrence warned her he would, Terrence had to come to her rescue.

“ Look I didn't mean to go off on you. I know you're just trying to help your friend. She's coming back now. When she gets here you go over and get some snacks from the machine. Take your time so I can talk to her.” I said mulling the idea of giving a total stranger a dime. Part of the reason I'd been so quiet as of late was I'd been thinking about my life and what I wanted to do with myself once I was released. Now that Tamera would be graduating soon, I felt like a huge burden was being lifted from my shoulders. I felt like I was finally done raising a child and I didn't even have any damn kids. I was still young. At 26 it was time to live my life and I was going to do just that.

I'd provided Tamera with an education and it was sad to say, but my mother was going to be on her own. The days of drinking her life away on my dime were over. I'd paid for four rehab centers and I was tired of trying to help a woman who didn't want help. Even if she was my mother. I'd been taking care of other people like a man since I was a fifteen year old boy. I was tired of it. I had enough money tucked away to make a clean start and as soon as I was released, I was going to live my life for me.
They better get ready because my pockets are about to be on lock.

“ Here you go! Damn you would think those vending machines were dispensing Ciroc and Patron' the way they were pushing and shoving to get at them! Two dollars for a damn soda?  They know damn well that's highway robbery for a daggone soda!” Dana said laughing as she sat down at the table sliding the drinks in their directions.

I looked up at this Dana and was struck silent for a second. Damn this prison got me off my square for real. It ain't like I ain't been in the presence of a bad bitches before. Dana's smile alone had me feeling a way I couldn't quite put my finger on. It was like I wanted her smile to be just for me.

“ I'm going to get us some snacks.” Tamera said getting up.

“ Oh I'm good. I don't want anything to eat.” Dana said taking a sip of her soda.

“ Yes you do. Leave.” I said nodding at Tamera who quickly scurried away.

“ So Tamera says you need eight thousand for school.”

Dana sat there momentarily shocked. Damn she knew they were going to discuss the issue but she at least thought Tamera would ease them into the conversation. Ol' boy just jumped right into it. Straight no chaser. Which was to be respected but it still left me feeling like a grimy beggin' ass bitch for some reason.

“ Terrence let me apologize. I did not know this was the reason she asked me to come here with her today. I'm as surprised as you are. I would never ask you for any money. We don't even know each other. So don't even give that a thought okay. I'm here and it's just nice to meet you. Tamera talks about you all the time.” Dana said smiling.

Nice to know she's not trying to hit me up for some cash off the rip
,I thought unable to take my eyes off her. She had the silkiest golden brown skin. Had me wanting to reach out and touch her ass for real.
Damn,these next few months need to fly by. Got me in here lusting after a female I don't even know.

“ So if you don't get the money what are you going to do? And if you don't mind my asking,from what Tamera said y'all should be graduating together which is soon. How have you paid for your classes all along and why all of a sudden you out of cash?”

Dana sighed and rubbed her forehead. The mere mention of her situation made her head ache.

“ You know what Terrence at the end of the day, this is my education on the line. No one is responsible for it but me. It's just very hurtful to me right now because all the rest of my school bills have been paid from money I received from my mom's insurance policy when she passed away. It wasn't some huge windfall but it was enough to cover all but this last year. I do work and pay my part of the rent with my roommate but I only bring in enough to cover rent,food and the subway back and forth to class. My dad promised to pay this for me,that is until his new girlfriend. Who's young enough to be my damn older sister stepped on the scene. He didn't even give me enough time to prepare, to get student loans or anything. I could have taken care of this had I known. But he just sprung it on me with no warning.”

I looked at her intently as she spoke. I could tell she was getting emotional and trying to keep herself from crying. It did something to me on the inside. She didn't seem to be greedy or spoiled,she was working to to make it. I could respect that. Hell my own sister wasn't even trying to do any of that. Not once in all these years had Tamera even offered to get a part-time job to contribute to anything. She was in for a rude awakening though.