Love Me Back (17 page)

I am trapped in hell.  There is no way to get home unless I call a cab and that would cost entirely too much money.  My mom is sitting on the bench a few feet away from me. I can see the agony on her face.  She has her phone out texting someone, I assume Gabe.  This is all too much information for me to process and come to terms with in a matter of five minutes.  Seeing my newly changed mom ready to cry desperately texting the man she loves.  Thinking she made the wrong decision makes me go to her.

“Sorry mom.  I didn’t mean to overreact back there.  It was just hard information for me to process.”  I sit next to her and the relief in her eyes is evident immediately.

“I understand honey.  It’s a lot of information to take in.”  She pats my knee.

“Is that him you are texting?”  I nod my head towards the phone in her hand.

“Yes, we are supposed to be meeting for the lunch now.”  She looks at the new text that came in.

“I can’t say this news isn’t hard to take but I will be ok, I just need a little time.  If you want my approval or blessing you have it.  I would never want to deny you happiness.”  I grab her hand squeezing it.

“Thank you Maddy.  You have no idea how happy that makes me.”  She hugs me hard.

“Let’s go see your man, shall we?”  I joke.

She looks at me raising one eyebrow questioning my sincerity.

“Really mom, it’s fine.”  I wrap my arm around her shoulders laughing.

I had to tell my mom I was ok with it what other choice did I have.  To see them together is going to be a challenge.  It kills me that he knows what happened to me.  I wonder if Gabe thinks of me differently because of it.  How could he not?

My mom and I walk into the pizza place that is roped off for the Jennings wedding.  I swear Jack is taking this to the extreme.  More people have shown up.  I see the Bassos and Edwards there along with some other people I don’t know.  Gabe and Ian are sitting at a table in the back corner so I go over to join them. 

“I’ll be right there honey, I want to say hello to a few people.”  She squeezes my forearm releasing me.

She walks right up to Mrs. Basso and they embrace each other warmly.  How the hell is Mrs. Basso ok with my mom dating her son when she hates me for some reason?  My mom continues making her way through the older generation until she rests next to a nicely dressed middle aged man.  He is wearing a Hawaiian shirt with khaki shorts.  He has a blonde gray hair with a mustache.  He face beams when he sees her and she gives him a kiss on the cheek. 

“Hey scaredy cat.  How was the carousel?  The horse didn’t go too high did it?”  Ian teases me.

“That’s not what gave me my scare.”  I look at Gabe and see anguish in his eyes.

“Excuse me” Gabe gets up from the table.

“Oh she told you huh?”  Ian asks.

“She told you before me?”  I say dumbfounded.

“Well, when he came by last night she didn’t really have a choice.”  He sheepishly looks at me.

“I honestly can’t believe it Ian.  That was the last person I would have thought it was.”  I put my head in my arms on the table.

“It’s not that bad.  Don’t you think you are being a little dramatic?”  He places his hand on my back.

“No.  I honestly don’t.  What is he going to be my father now?’  I turn my head towards him.

“Would that really be that bad Maddy?”

“You are kidding right?”  I sit up hearing footsteps coming back. 

“I thought you could use some beer.”  Gabe brings over a pitcher of beer.

“Try a couple shots.”  I sigh throwing my head back down on the table.

“Oh come on Maddy, we’ll be related now.  You were already practically a Basso, now you really will be one.”  Gabe smirks over at me.

“There is something seriously demented with you.”  I glare at him.

“I like to see the positive in situations.”  He pours me a beer putting it in front of me.

I take a sip of my beer looking over to my mom, who seems to be overly chummy with that Hawaiian shirt man.   She keeps patting his arm while talking and he can’t seem to keep his eyes off of her.  The whole table seems to be admiring the two of them.  I thought my mom had changed her ways but obviously not.  I look back at Gabe who seems to be staring as well.  The problem is I am scowling at them and he is smiling. 

“Doesn’t that bother you?”  I ask him pointing towards my mom.

“Why would it bother me?”  He questions curiously.  Ian looks over at me confused as well.   “Hey if they are happy that’s all that matters.”

“Huh, you are one of those open relationship kind of person then.”  I say.

“What?  What they do is there business.  It has nothing to do with me.”

“Yes it does.  You shouldn’t let her get away with that.”  I say curtly.

“With what?  Madgirl, you have to explain yourself, I am completely lost here.”  He shakes his head glancing from Ian to myself.

“Listen, if you are going to date my mom at least make sure she isn’t flirting with other people.  I wouldn’t want her using you.”  I take another gulp of beer.  I can’t stand this whole conversation.

“What?”  Gabe and Ian start cracking up laughing.  Ian is unable to control himself bending over slapping me on the back.

“Oh my god Maddy, I can’t believe you thought that.”  Ian mocks me.

The whole restaurant is now looking at our table wondering what is so funny. I feel my face getting redder by the minute.  I get up from the table walking outside.  As embarrassed as I am a sense of relief washes over me.

I barely get out the door before Gabe grabs my elbow stopping me.  “Whoa Maddy.”

“Gabe, just let me go. I am so embarrassed.”  I pull my elbow back from him.

“Why did you think I was dating your mom?”  He leads me over to the park bench out front.

“I don’t know.  She told me she was dating someone.  She made a joke about how she liked the Basso men too.  My mind started going back to you opening doors for her, having her sit up front.  She said the guy was over last night.  You kept joking and talking with her today.  I guess my mind went right to you when she said it.”  I start rambling trying to think how I got to that conclusion myself.

“Jesus Maddy, you drive me crazy.”  He put his head in his hands running them through his hair.

“I’m sorry Gabe.”  I play with my hands in my lap wishing this would all go away.

“I could give a shit about you thinking I was seeing your mom.  I just don’t understand why you refuse to acknowledge this.”  He motions his hand back and forth between us.

“What?”  I whisper.

“Please don’t play dumb.  I don’t know how much more I can take.”  His anger is starting to spill.

“Why are you so mad at me?”  I automatically become defensive.

“That’s it Maddy.  I’m done.”  He yells standing up from the bench. 

“What? Why?  Gabe!”  I yell after him.

He doesn’t acknowledge my screams continuing to walk away for me.  I start jogging over to him but his strides are two of mine.  I see him duck into the Eagle ride thinking that is his way away from me but I don’t intend on stopping now.  He walks up to the line and I excuse myself between him and the people that came right after.

“Hey lady no cuts.”  A boy says to me.

“I’m not riding, I just need to talk to that man right there.”  I point to Gabe who is still ignoring me.

“Like I haven’t heard that before.”  He gives me a dirty look.

I ignore him. My mind set on talking to one person and when I finally reach him his arms are crossed over his chest and he looks like he is going to beat the shit of out of someone.

“Gabe, please tell me what is going on?  Why are you mad at me?”  I plead touching his arm.

“If you don’t know Maddy, it’s not worth it.  I can’t do it anymore.”  He pulls his arm away from me.

“Do what anymore?  Worth what?  Gabe, you are acting like a fifth grader.”  I cross my arms glaring at him.

“Original Madgirl.”  He uses my nickname that he does in front of other people.

“Gabe, I thought we were friends.”  I can hear my own desperation in my voice.

“That’s exactly the problem.” 

“That we are friends?  If you don’t want to be my friend just say so.”  I am whispering not wanting to make a scene in public.

“My god Maddy, what do I have to do to make you see it?”  He throws his arms in the air obviously not worried about the people trying to hear us in line.

“Again Gabe, see what?”  I scream my face turning red out of anger and embarrassment.  With all the yelling I realize we are at the front of the line so I try to step to the side.

“Ma’am you need to get behind him if you are riding.”  The sixteen year old attendant says to me.

“Ma’am?”  A look of disbelief in my eyes. Gabe starts chuckling quietly.

“Yeah Ma’am are you going to ride with me or not?”  Gabe asks me smirking.

“You know I don’t ride roller coasters.”

“I’ve seen you ride them before.”  He mentions making me wonder if this is about me riding a roller coaster.

The next coaster comes in and the people get off with their hair all windblown but smiles plastered on their faces.  Gabe gets in sitting down in his assigned seat.  I look at him and then the attendant who keeps yelling over to me to either get in or move out of the way.  The blonde behind me looks like she wants to run me over for her chance to sit next to Gabe.  The sun is making Gabe’s blue eyes sparkle more when he looks at me.  For some reason his face brings over a calming safe feeling so I hop in the seat fastening my belt.  The metal bar comes down and my throat free falls into my stomach.

Gabe is staring over at me instead of looking at the hill ahead. 

“You got me on this ride so you better answer the question.”  My words are staggering as we reach the middle of the first hill and I am trying to only concentrate on him.  His defined jawbone that comes to the smallest point when it reaches his chin.  How his eyes are set back but his long dark eyelashes making it so you don’t notice right away.  The sun has developed a few small wrinkles around his eyes.  Lastly I land on his lips that are turned up for me now.  His bottom lip a little pouty compared to his top lip.  They are the perfect shade of dark pink and when they open you see his white teeth.  All perfectly straight except for one at the bottom that slightly covers another indicating he never had braces.  He was a gorgeous man.

The top of the hill is fast approaching making my anxiety higher.   My heart is beating out of my chest.  Gabe grabs my hand telling me it would be ok. Just as our car is about to go over the hill I squeeze his hand so hard closing my eyes.  My butt starts coming up from the seat at the same time Gabe’s lips meet mine.  His hand rests on my cheek while his mouth covers mine.  His tongue licks my bottom lip asking to enter which I happily open my mouth.  Our tongues mingle together while butterflies fill my stomach.  When Gabe pulls away my mouth goes cold, I stare into his eyes noticing we aren’t moving anymore.  Then I hear the hollers and clapping around us.  I don’t remember the ride only Gabe’s mouth and hands.  Looking around at the crowd my face turns a nice shade of pink.

“Come on let’s get out of here.”  Gabe grabs my hand leading me out from the coaster.

We walk hand in hand down the exit ramp.  He pulls me over to the train station that is already boarding.  We grab an empty row in the back. 

He instantly kisses my lips but this time it is short.  “We need to talk.”  He says.

“It’s fine Gabe.  Thank you for keeping my mind off the ride.”  This is where he tells me we can’t be together for one of the twenty reasons listed in his head.

“Maddy, I mean this in the nicest possible way.  I need you to shut up for about five minutes.”

“I will try.”  I agree.

“That kiss wasn’t just to help you keep your mind of the ride.  I mean it was but I wouldn’t have done it if I didn’t want to.”  He grabs both my hands with his putting them in his lap.  “This is so much harder than I thought it would be…Let me ask you something?”

“I thought you wanted me to shut up?” I raise my eyebrows in question.

“I did until now.”  He doesn’t laugh or smile. 

“Ok ask away.”  I become concerned inching closer to him.

“Do you feel this?”  He motions between the two of us.

I look at him questioning.  “Gabe, I felt that kiss everywhere if that is what you are asking.”

“Yes…no.”  He pulls his hands away brushing them through his hair.  “What I am trying to say is…I love you.  I know it’s complicated as hell for us and all the people that won’t understand it but I have loved you for so many years.  I thought I could get over you when I moved to Florida but every girl I tried to date never kept my interest, they never compared to you.  There were so many times I wanted to tell you but one thing after the next held me back.  I am sick of waiting for the time to be right or people to come to grips.  I want you to be mine.”  He divulges not looking up at me.

“Oh Gabe!”  I don’t know what to say.  I know I love him too but I can’t stop thinking about Trent or his family not liking me.  The trouble it would cause if we got together.

“Shit!”  He yells and the family a couple rows up turn their heads towards us.

“Sorry” I apologize to them.

“I thought for sure you felt the same way.”  He whispers staring at his feet.

“Gabe, look at me.”  I place my hand on his knee.

He slowly turns his face up to mine his eyes filled with regret and despair. 

“Who said I didn’t?”  I smile over at him.

“God, you scared the shit out of me.”  He confesses.

“Gabe just because I feel the same doesn’t mean I think it’s a good idea to be together.”  His smile falters and he shakes his head.

“Maddy, it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks.  If we love each other we should be together.”

“Your mom hates me, Trent is your brother, and we live in different parts of the country.  Nothing about this is right” 

“All that matters is this” he kisses me again but this time more urgent and persistent.  Our lips and tongue can’t seem to get enough.   His arms are warm around me, fingers gingerly running through my hair.  My hands rest on his firm chest.  That feeling is there again.  The electricity I only feel with him.  As though everything is right in the world when I am with him.