Love Me ~ Through the Storm (3 page)

3

Kane

I’ve had my small production company, SugarKane Productions, for a couple of years. I’ve managed to keep it on the down low from all of my friends. Only Ruby, my Mimi knows. I use my first name, Luther, with the people who work for me, it’s not like we run in the same social groups anyway. My friends know me as Kane. I want to keep all the parts of my life separate. Everyone in their cubbyhole. It makes my life easier and neater.

Oakley called me during a set and I had to call for a wrap. Of course, none of them cared; they’ll all get their full day’s pay. She calls. I go running. It’s been that way since she was little. I’ll continue to be here for her until the day I die. Clay can warn me all he wants to stay from him and his family, but when it comes to staying away from Oakley, we have a problem. Someone needs to be there for her, now more than ever.

What astonishes me is how everyone else is so clueless to what is going on inside her. Can they not see her hurting? Going through Hell is bad enough but having the people closest to you not even realizing it would be unbearable. That’s why I can’t leave her.

“Now that we’re alone, Little Sister, do you want to talk about what’s going on in that head?” We’re sitting in my car because I want to talk to her about these panic attacks she’s having before we go anywhere.

“No, let’s catch a movie or something. I don’t want to think about all of that again.” She runs her hands through her hair.

“I think it’s time you give more thought about talking to someone.”

“I can’t, Kane, I’m scared, scared that I can’t do it alone. If that makes me sound like a little kid, then so be it.”

“I know we’ve all at one point or another encouraged you to get some help, but Oakley, I really think you need to.  It doesn’t mean you're weak or crazy. It means you’re smart enough to realize that you have a problem and that you need help working through it.”

“I can handle it, Kane. It’s only when I feel forced to talk about that day.”

“Who tried to force you to talk about it? Your roommates? Do I need to go over and talk to them?” I say, narrowing my eyes.

“Honestly, they didn’t technically force me. We were all sitting around getting to know each other and they asked about my family. The question just sent me right back to that day. I remembered everything. My insides were quivering. Like I was back there in the house. I swear I could hear the gunshots, smell the gunpowder, and see the blood splatter as if it were happening all over again.”

“That’s why you need to talk with someone, I’ll take you to every single appointment. I’ll there for you before and after. Whatever you need, I just want you to get better.”

“I don’t want Clay and all of them to know about this. It’s embarrassing enough that it happens and I have to call you.” She sniffles a little.

“Hey, now. You don’t have to be embarrassed around me. I care about you. We’ve been friends forever,” I tell her.

“Kane, why are you so good to me?” She leans toward me.

“Because you make it so easy.” I reach over and pat her on her knee. “You’re a kind, wonderful, beautiful person, Oakley, and very easy to be friends with.”

“You and Quinn are the only two people I can count on to always be here. I don’t know what I’d do if either of you left me, too.”

“You don’t have to worry about me leaving you, I’m here for the long haul.”

“Do you promise, Kane? You’ll never leave me?” Her voice cracks on my name.

“Of course I do, you’re my girl. I’ve told you over and over. Are you ever going to believe me?” I give her a reassuring smile.

“I believe you, but I just like to hear it. Now, let’s go to the movies, I want to see something that will make me laugh,” Oakley says, seeming to have calmed down a little.

“Remember, you are strong. All you need now is courage.” I wink at her. I hate that she’s had such a hard year. I hate that Clay is so clueless that she’s hurting and needs help. Too bad, he hates me for no real reason. When he and Lizzie broke up a few months back, I made a move. Maybe I shouldn’t have, but she was sending me some hot and heavy vibes before they got together. If he hadn’t called her off limits, things might have been different.

After we get to the theater, Oakley makes a beeline for the concession stand.

“Do you want a coke and popcorn?” I ask, following her over to the refreshments counter.

“I want Raisinets and a Diet Coke, and I’ll just eat some of your popcorn,” she says, giving me a wink.

“Who said I was sharing my popcorn with you?” I give her a smirk.

Oakley gives me her sweet little smile, “Please.” She clasps her hands, holding them against her chin.

“If you’re going to beg, I guess you can have some of my popcorn, but you’ll have to share your candy.”

“You wish! Buy your own candy.” She laughs.

This is what she was like before the death of her parents, happy and carefree. I want her to be like this all of the time and if that means me taking her to a movie or out to eat every now and then, that’s what I’ll do.

The movie was a silly chick flick, but it was funny. We laughed and had a great time. During the scenes where the girl was sad because her boyfriend broke up with her, Oakley laid her head on my shoulder, and I ended up putting my arm around her. Sometimes, just knowing you have a shoulder to cry on or someone to lean on is all you need.

“Kane, thank you for getting me out of my dorm. I’m really glad you decided to move back to Nashville. You’re lucky that you have a job that you can work from anywhere.”

“Yeah. I guess I’m lucky.” If she only knew what I really did, she would be appalled. “You come first, before all of that anyway. I’m serious, Oak, call me anytime.” I raise my eyebrows. “How about a burger and fries, does that sound good?”

“Yes! Are we going to GG’s?”

GG owns our gang's favorite place to eat. I would say we’re bias about her food being the best since she’s our drummer, Michael’s grandmother, but her food is truly amazing. The food is something like upscale soul food and the atmosphere is homey but classy. The problem with being the outcast member of the band is I’m not sure how far down my indiscretions have trickled. Knowing GG, she could accept me with open arms, or hit me up the side of my head with her iron skillet.

“How about we go somewhere else, maybe where no one knows us? That way, there won’t be any awkward looks or questions.”

“Good point, I didn’t think about that. Surprise me then!” Oakley loops her arm through mine as we walk to the car.  

I notice something is wrong as we are walking up on my car, “What the hell? Both of my back tires are flat!” I bend down, looking at them.

“Did you run over something?” Oakley leans down to take a look. “There’s a big gash over here on the side. Is that a blowout?”

“Fuck!” I stand up and look at the front tires and realize they’re flat, too. “Son of a bitch. Someone slashed my tires. I’m going to kill whoever did this!” I baby my car, not because it’s a classic sixty-nine Camaro, but because it was Mimi’s. She bought it new—white with black racing stripes. A few years ago, she gave it to me. There is only one person I can think of that would do this…Megan, that fucking whore!

“Do you have any idea who may have done this?”

“I don’t know.” I lie because I don’t want to get into that conversation with Oakley.

“Maybe they have security cameras.” Oakley places her hand on my shoulder. “We should call the police.”

“This is a privately owned parking lot so the police don’t normally get involved. Even if we have a license plate, it probably wouldn’t do much good. I bet they don’t have any security cameras.”

“That’s a crock of shit.”

I take out my phone to call Triple A, “I’ll take care of it. Right now, we need a tow truck and ride to get you back to your dorm. Sorry about dinner, can I get a rain check?”

“Forget dinner, I’m sorry some loser messed up your baby!” Oakley wraps her arms around me, giving me a hug.

4

Oakley

It’s the last weekend before classes start and there are going to be several pre-class parties.  My dorm-mates are going to a frat party, and they keep bugging me about going with them.

“Noelle, I would go with you guys, but Quinn won’t be here until Sunday night. I’m sure he wouldn’t want me going out without him. Not to a frat party.” I know I wouldn’t want him going to some sorority or frat party without me. They’re nothing more than a meat market where people are looking to hook up, and I don’t want to spend the whole night getting hit on.

“Please, you two aren’t married or even engaged. Besides, it’s not like you’re going to screw every guy there.” Noelle laughs. “You’re going to have to go out without him sometime. He’ll be gone a good bit with the ROTC program, right?”

“Why don’t you invite Yummy?” Sandy asks with a smirk.

“Who’s Yummy? Have you been holding out on us, Oakley?” Piper asks, raising her eyebrows.

“If you’re talking about Kane, he’s not
yummy
, he’s Kane. Get that straight.” I shrug and say, “He probably has a date tonight.”

“Come out with us! You are not staying here alone this evening, missy!” Sandy insists while she and Noelle do their makeup in our tiny bathroom. 

“Okay, but I’m taking my car because I may not want to stay the whole time.”

“No way. You won’t be able to drink and cut loose if you have to drive back home. We’ll call a cab and you can get another one when you get ready to leave.” Piper throws her hip out to one side and props her hand on it. She’s standing in front of my closet, looking through my clothes. “Let’s see what you’ve got to wear. No, too country,” she says, looking at my plaid shirt. “No, too uptight, too boring, too sweet. None of this will work, I guess you’ll have to wear something of mine.”

“Uh-uh, no way, I’m not going out looking like I’m available. Besides, Quinn will be home in two days, and I’m not looking for nor do I want anyone else. He has my heart, you know I love him.” I take out a pair of jeans and one of Clay’s band t-shirts.

“At least, wear this denim skirt, you have incredible legs.” Piper pulls out the skirt and hands it to me. “You shouldn’t have to hide them just because you have a boyfriend. Oh, and your boots, yeah, those are killer boots. Are they vintage? I love them.”

“They were my mom’s,” I say quietly, “I’ll wear the skirt and my boots, but don’t expect me to wear anything other than this t-shirt.”

“If you want to go without a bra or panties, honey, who am I to tell you no?” Piper laughs as she walks out of our room, “I’ll be back. I’m going to find myself something to wear.”

“Oakley, I want to do your makeup,” Noelle calls from the bathroom.

“I can do my own, thank you.”

“Come on, let me have some fun.”

“Why am I the pet project around here?” I protest. “Ugh, whatever! But don’t make it too dark.”

“Yay! Come in here, I’m all done with mine,” Noelle says.

“I think this is all a little ridiculous because I know how to put on my own makeup and dress myself. It’s not like I’m some kind of…of… whatever it is that y’all think I am,” I tell them as I squeeze in the bathroom.

“Oakley, that’s just what friends do, chill out,” Noelle waves her hand, dismissing my complaints.

When the taxi pulls up outside our building, I’m glad to see they sent a van. I did not want to be the odd man out and have to sit up front with the driver. Thinking up casual conversation wears me out.

We all look really good tonight and I’ll have to admit Noelle did a great job on my makeup. She played up the drama on my eyes and they look really green. “I love my makeup, Noelle. Thank you for doing it. Text me the colors you used on my eyes, I love when they look this green.”

“You’re really lucky, Oakley, you can change your eye color by what you wear or how you do your eye makeup. Your eyes are so beautiful. I’ve always wanted hazel eyes,” Sandy says.

“Thanks. Everyone back home tells me they look like cat eyes, which can get awkward because guys want to relate that to…” I whisper the rest of it, “pussy.” I can feel my face heat up.

They all get a good laugh at me turning all red. I join in the laughter. It feels good to let go and have fun.

“We’re going to have a good time tonight, ladies. Who’s ready to get their freak on?” Sandy waves her hands in the air as we stop in front of the frat house.

“I have these sticks my sister-in-law uses,” I say. “They let you know if someone’s put some type of drug in your drinks. Here, I brought enough for all of us.” I hold out my hand full of the testers.

“You know, I’ve never worried about all of that, but it’s better to be safe than sorry.” Noelle reaches for one.

Sandy and Piper each take a stick.

“Here’s to having a little fun that we can all remember the next day.” Sandy holds out her stick.

We all tap them together, and the gesture makes me feel like we’re a team getting ready to take the field. I guess, in a way, we are because we’ll all have each other’s back. I haven’t felt this connected since leaving Tennessee in middle of my junior year. I only made one good friend once I moved to Alabama, Raelynn. I don’t count Quinn.

The party is already in full swing when we walk inside. “This place is crowded. Do any of you know anyone here?” I ask them.

“Yeah, my brother is on the football team and all of his friends are going to be here with him,” Sandy says. “Dakota won’t let anyone mess with us, if we don’t want them to.”

“What if we do want them to? Will he introduce us to his friends? Are they hot?” Noelle smirks and lifts one eyebrow.

“They’re football players, Noelle, what do you think?” Piper asks.

“That doesn’t mean they’re hot.”

“Dakota’s friends are flaming hot, but the one I’m interested in is Corbin. Have any of you guys checked him out yet? On second thought—don’t,” Sandy says and types something on her phone.

“If we can’t have Corbin, who else will be here that will pique our interest?” Piper asks as we start patrolling the perimeter of the room. 

“They’re out back. Come on and I’ll introduce you guys.” Sandy heads toward the backyard.

“Look at her, she sure can swing those hips, I bet she will have Corbin before the night is over,” Piper whispers to me laughing.

“I bet you’re right, she’s gorgeous,” I tell her.

In the backyard, lights are strung in the branches of the trees and run from the house to the back fence. A keg sets on a big barrel full of ice next to a picnic table. They have classic red solo cups and some bags of chips. I laugh to myself. You can tell guys were in charge of planning this party. They only bought the necessities—beer and chips. I’m sure if Clay was in charge of a party, that’s all he would have, too.

Sandy maneuvers us through the crowd until she spots her brother. He’s tall with a broad chest, and he looks like he’s made of steel. He and Sandy look a lot alike with the big brown eyes, but his hair reminds me of brown sugar. It’s shiny, light brown, and perfect. Sandy’s hair reminds me more of spun honey, both of them look like they could be runway models. Good looks must run in their family.

“Dakota!” Sandy sings out.

“Hey, you made it and you brought friends. Nice.” He smiles at her, “Guys, most of you know my kid sister, Sandy.”

“These are my friends, Piper, Noelle, and Oakley,” Sandy tells them.

“Did you girls not get anything to drink?” Dakota asks us.

“We came straight over here to you,” Sandy says.

“We’ll go get everyone a beer, Dakota,” one of Dakota’s friends says, before he turns to me and says, “I’m Keith, would you like to come with me to get the beers?”

He must be the runt on the football team because he’s smaller than the rest of them. Not that he’s tiny, he’s still bigger than Quinn. “Sure, I’ll help you. I’m Oakley.” I tell him as we walk to the keg.

Keith fills up the cups of beers and hands them to me to hold. “What’s your major?” he asks.

“I’m getting a degree in Deaf Studies Education. I want to be a teacher for deaf students. What about you?”

Keith takes two of the cups from me and we head back to the group. “I am studying Sports Medicine. That’s why I get to hang out with the team.”

“You don’t play?”

“Nah, those guys put their bodies through torture every week, I’m more about pleasure. I can give a mean massage,” he says, raising his eyebrows. “You know if your homework ever gets too stressful.”

See, he had to go and hit on me. Why can’t we keep things on a friendly level? “Can you teach my boyfriend your techniques?” I say, giving a small smile.

We reach our friends and he hands off his beers to Piper and Noelle while I give Sandy the extra one in my hand.

Keith motions for me to take a couple of steps away from our group. He then drops his grin and his mouth goes more into a grimace. “I wasn’t coming on to you because that’s part of our curriculum. We have an office set up that we are required to work in, and most of our clients are athletes.” Keith swipes the back of his neck.

“Sorry, this is my first party like this. All I really know about them is what I see on television.” I look at my feet. “I’m so embarrassed.” I look back up at him through my eyelashes.

“It’s fine. I just wanted you to know that I’m not a jerk. You’re a pretty girl, and I can see why guys come on to you a lot. I guess that’s probably why you have a boyfriend, too,” Keith gives me another smile.

We rejoin the group and I actually loosen up. I don’t know if it’s the beer or if it’s Keith that has put me at ease, but I feel relaxed. We all group dance, and I even dance with a few of the guys. Nothing touching or sexual, just as friends. Keith and I talk some more. I think we could end up being friends.

I feel my butt vibrate and laugh because it tickles. I reach to my back pocket and pull my phone out. I have a text from Quinn.

Quinn
:
I have great news!

Oakley
:
What?

Quinn:
 
They want me early, I’ve signed up, and I’m getting a big signing bonus. I’ll be leaving on Sunday.

Oakley:
 
No, you promised you wouldn’t leave me. I can’t, Q, you know I can’t make it without you.

Quinn:
 
You’ll be fine. I’ll be done with my next set of training before you’re done with your semester. I’ll be back to see you then.

Oakley:
 
It’s not enough. I thought you understood, I thought I could count on you.

Quinn:
 
Baby, please understand. Meet me like we planned tomorrow. We can talk.

Oakley:
 
I don’t know, Q. This hurts, it hurts too fucking much. You’re just like everyone else.

I throw my phone and run. I have no idea where I’m going, but I can’t lose it in front of everyone. I need solitude. My throat is burning and my heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest. I can feel the tears rushing out of my eyes faster than I ever dreamed were possible. I can’t breathe and my stomach is in one large knot. I hear Sandy calling after me, but I don’t stop. I can’t. I need a refuge. I need Kane.