Love or Money? (16 page)

She felt herself becoming emotional, the reality of her decision to leave Owen hitting her hard. She stopped talking, aware t
hat her voice was becoming high-pitched and slightly hysterical.

Owen grabbed her hand and
squeezed it. “Remember that you’re a Rose, you can bloom wherever you’re planted. Never worry about not fitting in or living up to other’s ideals. You’re a beautiful person Fee; you just need to let that softer side of yourself come out more. It is possible to be both vulnerable and strong you know. You don’t always have to try to be a warrior.”

It was such an odd but beautiful thing to say. Felicity tried to swallow back the sob that was in her throat but she couldn’t fight it.
  Owen always had the ability to see straight into her soul. She didn’t want to have to be a cold, controlling person; she wanted to be the woman she’d become around him. Fun, easy-going and gentle. He brought out the side of her that she’d thought she’d lost touch with.

“
I’m going to miss you so much, Owen.” Hiccupping through sobs, she buried her head into his chest and felt his arms wrap around her.  She waited for his words but they never came. Instead he rubbed her back and kissed her lightly on her forehead.

“
No more tears. Drink your coffee before it goes cold” he instructed with a sad smile.

Trying to swallow tears with her coffee, Fe
licity did as she was told, all the time aware that Owen’s arms hadn’t been removed from embracing her. She wondered if it meant that he didn’t want to let her go.

“
I suppose I should go now. If I sit here any longer, it will only make it ten times harder to say goodbye when the time comes.” Breaking away from his embrace she searched in her handbag for a tissue, before blowing her nose and smiling bravely.

“
Nothing is forever, Fee. Just because we are saying goodbye, doesn’t mean we won’t meet again” he said, trying to sound his wise and uplifting self. Instead the words came out strangled.

“
Nice try, Owen” Felicity joked, standing up and zipping up her holdall.

He smiled but it didn’t reach his eyes. Standing up, he stood facing her shoving his hands awkwardly into his pockets. For the first time ever, he looked like a lost little boy and his vulnerability shone through.

“Ok, so on that note I am going to say thank you for the most amazing month spent in Cairns and the time we spent in Brisbane.” Felicity reached out and pulled his hands from his jeans pockets, holding them in her own. “Meeting you has been the best thing I could have asked for. I’m just sad it’s ending so soon. But honestly, Owen, thank you. You’ve made me realise so much.”

A flash of confusion passed across his face, and Felicity felt his grip tighten in her hands. She leaned forward to hug him and before she knew what was happening, his mouth was on hers.
  The five weeks spent imagining how it would feel to kiss him bore no comparison to the waves of tender and passionate emotion that were flooding through her. His gentle and delicate way with her made her feel safe and secure. It wasn’t the kiss of a man in lust, it was the kiss of a man that wanted to taste and feel her on a deeper level.

Drawing away from her, Felicity gently let go of his hands and for a few moments they stood observing each other without words. Owen’s green eyes sparkled before he broke into an enormous smile of delight.

“You certainly know how to do goodbye’s” he joked, running his hands through his hair.

Biting down on her lip to stop herself from grinning toothily, Felicity laughed at Owen, taking in his
disheveled and awestruck appearance.

“
Well, I guess you should go. You need time to get through departures and to your gate” he said, bringing her back to the moment with a thud. Felicity looked at him dumbfounded. How could he so casually disregard the kiss? It was clear he felt as shell-shocked as she did about the volume of chemistry they’d just encountered. Why once again was he fighting his emotions? Surely this changed things between them?

Trying not to show her disappointment, Felicity nodded in agreement and picked up her holdall, unsure what to say or do.
She was in love with a man who had kissed her as passionately as a soul mate kisses his better half. Why wasn’t he acknowledging it?

Owen backed away from her further and picked up his jacket,
swinging it over his shoulder. “So I guess I’ll see you when I see you, Felicity Harroway.” 

His offhand words hit her like bricks and the gap between them widened as he continued walking backward
s. Looking at him through narrowed eyes and trying not to show her hurt, Felicity attempted a smile. See you when I see you? What kind of a goodbye was that?!

Breathing in a long breath through her nose, Felici
ty began walking away from Owen, at each step feeling a desperate urge to run back and jump into his arms.  Only when she felt there was a safe distance between them, did she finally turn back and wave.

Owen was already out of sight.

Chapter Twenty

Glenda glanced once again at the computerised arrivals board and restlessly tapped her foot against the tiled airport floor. 

“
Come on Felicity, where are you?” she murmured to herself, checking the time on her watch. According to the board, the flight landed over an hour ago. So where was her daughter?

Spotting an attendant nearby in a fluorescent orange waistcoat, she wondered anxiously whether to ask if there had been a problem with the flight.

“Mum!”

Spinning around in the direction of the excited voice, she did a double take as she spotted her daughter weaving her way through the crowd with her sui
tcase. “Well I never…” Glenda whispered to herself in astonishment. Gone was Felicity’s long blonde flowing locks and in their place was a shorter, messier, layered style. Teamed with her sun kissed skin and minimal makeup, she looked like a glowing beauty without a care in the world. 

Glenda rushed to her assistance, feeling overwhelmed at seeing her daughter’s new appearance.
 

“
Oh Darling, I’m so happy you’re home” she threw her arms around Felicity, kissing her on the cheek. Expecting her daughter to brush her off quickly, she was surprised when Fee hugged her back with the same enthusiasm and warmth. Standing back from each other, they eagerly surveyed one another from head to foot.

“
Mum, you look so different! You look really well – so much younger. Since when did you start doing your make-up like that? And your hair?!” Laughing, Felicity reached out and flicked Glenda’s honey highlighted layers. 

Glenda slapped her hand away playfully.
“You can talk - you’re like a different person. I did a double glance when you called out to me. You look so beautiful, darling. Honestly, I haven’t seen you looking this relaxed and rested in a long time.” Glenda noticed a flash of sadness pass across her daughter’s face. “Come on, let’s get you home. You must be shattered.”

Linking arms with her mum, Felicity felt relieved to be back on UK soil. She was home. All of the hurt and confusion of the last twenty hours had ebbed away as the jet lag had began to seep in and her body screamed out for sleep.
 

“
I can’t wait to get home. I need sleep.” 

Gle
nda rubbed her daughter’s arm. “You can sleep in the car, love, while I drive us back.  Speaking of which, that GPS of yours came in so handy, I would never have made it here otherwise. Bundle of nerves, I was, on that motorway.”

Felicity laughed tiredly. Despite her mum’s new appearance and a thousand questions that she wanted to ask, she was pleased that some things hadn’t changed. She needed her mot
her’s down-to-earth advice, now more than ever.

“I also got you the special buffalo mozzarella that you like. Oh, and the bread with the pumpkin seeds, I picked you one of those up.” Glenda pointed inside the open kitchen cupboard to the neatly stacked goods.

Felicity took a sip of the fruit smoothie her mother had prepared
for her and smiled. She felt refreshed after a few hours of sleep and a shower, the long haul flight already seeming a distant memory.

“
Thanks. You needn’t have gone to all of this trouble. The place looks lovely by the way; I noticed the fresh gerberas in the hallway.” 

Glenda beamed with pride. Felicity hadn’t been back long and yet she’d received more compliments and commendations from her in the space of half a day, than she had in the last few years.

“Well, you know I like to keep things tip-top.” She sat down at the dining table next to her daughter. “Anyhow, we have lots of catching up to do. I can’t say I wasn’t surprised to hear that you were coming back, love. I thought you were enjoying Cairns?” She reached out and rubbed Felicity’s knee affectionately. “What about your flat-mate Owen? What made you change your mind?”

Felicity put down her glass and sank her head into her hands, the uncomfortable and confu
sed feelings of the past twenty-four hours returning. “Oh, Mum, it’s such a mess. I don’t even know where to start.”

Glenda reached out and gently pulled Felicity’s hand
s away from covering her face. “At the beginning is usually a good place, love.”

Felicity sighed sadly. How could she even try to put into words the feelings she was experiencing?
 

Inhaling slo
wly to calm her nerves and mind, she began to tell her mother about her trip, from her arrival in Sydney to her kiss with Owen. Neither woman noticed that the hands of the clock were hastily ticking by. Only when Felicity stopped speaking and Glenda sat wide-eyed in shock, did they realise that the evening darkness had arrived.

Switching on the kitchen halogen lights, Glenda mulled over Fee’s admission. It wasn’t what she’d been expecting in the slightest. Her Fee in love with Owen the volunteer? She couldn’t get her head around it.
  The woman that had sat next to her for nearly two hours, animatedly telling her about days spent in butterfly sanctuaries and cable carting up to an aboriginal rainforest village, hardly bore any resemblance to the Fee that had left her eight weeks previously. 

“
In honesty, love, I don’t know what to say. You’ve changed so much, Felicity. I never in a million years thought you’d return and tell me that you’d fallen in love with someone.” Glenda opened the fridge and took out a pie she’d prepared the previous day, shaking her head in amazement. “Don’t get me wrong, this Owen from what you’ve said, well, he sounds a lovely person. But it doesn’t make sense, love, that he didn’t ask you to stay.” Glenda pursed her lips. What on earth was wrong with the man?

Felicity watched distractedly as her mother opened the oven door and put the large tray
of pie onto the middle shelf. “I know. That’s why I just feel so confused. Honestly, I don’t know what to think. When we kissed it felt so right. It sounds ridiculous, but I don’t think I’ve ever felt that way when kissing someone. Not even with James.”

Still wearing an oven glove, Glenda sat back down at the dining table.
“The best thing you can do for now is to put him to one side. Whatever’s meant to be, Fee, it won’t pass you by.” She looked at her daughter’s downcast mouth and tried to raise her spirits. “Perhaps he needs to realise his feelings for you. You’ve done the best thing by coming back – it’ll give him a bit of time to consider things. If you’re supposed to be together, he’ll come looking you. You wait and see.”

Felicity got up and hugged her mother tightly. Being with Owen and getting more in tune with
her emotions had made her realise that she didn’t show her mother just how much she appreciated her. Australia had taught her that distance made you value the ones who are special in your life. She knew that Glenda would have a wise opinion on the matter and she deeply hoped she was right about him. Maybe he would come to value her now that she wasn’t there. 

“
Goodness, I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.” Glenda said in jest, breaking away from her daughter’s affectionate cuddle. “I would have sent you to Australia when you were fifteen if I’d known then that you’d come back so different.”

Felicity giggled and picked up the used glasses, takin
g them over to the dishwasher. “Enough of me. I want to hear about everything that’s been going on with you. Don’t try and tell me there’s nothing new because I can tell that there is.” She looked toward her mother and noticed a faint blush spreading across her cheeks. “And I’ve noticed you haven’t picked your thumbnail or stuttered once since I’ve been home.”

Glenda’s heart pounded strongly in her chest and she felt her hands begin to tremble ever so slightly. It was the moment she had been dreading.
  Turning her back on Fee in an attempt to buy herself more time, she fidgeted nervously with the switches on the oven.

“
Yes, there’s been a few changes with me.” She chose her words carefully, not daring to turn and look at her daughter. “I met someone, you see.”

“
Met someone?” Felicity was instantly at her mother’s side, staring directly at her with a startled expression.

With no choice but to answer her daughter face on, Glenda took a deep breath
trying not to rush her words. “Yes, his name is Bill, he’s a very good man and we are very much in love.”

She leaned against the oven, feeling the heat travelling up the back of her body
but not daring to move as she warily registered Fee’s reaction.

Putting her hand across her chest in a subconscious movement to calm her beating heart, Felicity wasn’t sure how to respond. Her mother was in love? When had it happened? Why hadn’t she noticed?

“My word, I don’t know what to say.” Felicity was speechless. Overcome with emotion, she felt suddenly uneasy and drained of energy.

Moving away from the cooker, Glenda’s mothering instincts took over, steering her daughter back toward the dining table and i
ndicating for her to sit down. “I know it’s come as a shock, love, and believe me you’re not the only one who is surprised by it. I really wasn’t expecting it either.”

Felicity deliberated in her head. There was no doubt about it - she was shocked. Selfishly, part of her had taken it for granted that her mother would always be single. Hearing that there was now a man in her life wasn’t a familiar experience or even a welcomed one. Looking at Glenda’s anxious face and noticing her beginning to pick at her nails, made her take stock. Her mother deserved
happiness and love in her life; Felicity knew all too well that being alone and feeling unloved led to a cold and unhappy existence. Her mother had never looked so radiant and young. She didn’t want the anxious Glenda to return. Whoever this Bill was, he was certainly doing her the world of good - and who was she to interfere with that?

“
I’m happy for you. Truly I am. It’s about time you had someone to share things with.” Felicity bit down on her lip as her mother’s eyes welled up with tears. 

“
Do you really mean that, love?” Glenda asked, dumbfounded.

Felicity nodded her head. “
I do. I know it hasn’t been easy for you, all of these years on your own.” She tried to lighten the mood a little. “Besides anyone who can get you looking this good within such a short space of time deserves a medal.” 

Glenda giggled;
she felt as if a huge weight that had been resting on her shoulders had been lifted. She knew that Felicity wasn’t entirely comfortable with the news, but to have her daughter’s blessing was the most important thing she could have wished for.

“S
o are you going to leave me in suspense or are you going to tell me a little bit about Bill then?” 

Now it was Glenda’s turn to slump in her seat and wonder where to begin. Filling her daughter in on Bill and their developing relationship, she was happy to note that Felicity didn’t pass a single judgment or negative comment. Instead, her daughter listened and smiled as she detailed the highlights of her past two months.

“I can’t believe you’ve waited eight weeks to tell me about this. Honestly Mum, you could have told me sooner.” 

Glenda reluctantly broke away from the conversation to take the heated pie from the oven.
“I know, but it wasn’t the right time, love, what with the Dan situation and then you going to Australia. There just didn’t seem to be an appropriate moment.”

Deep down, Felicity knew that her mother was right. Would she really have been so accepting o
f the relationship if she’d known about it sooner? She couldn’t be sure that she would have. She knew that a lot of her new found acceptance was directly thanks to Owen. He’d taught her so much in their small amount of time together.

“
When do I get to meet Bill then?” she asked, taking a bottle of wine from the fridge and pouring two glasses.

Glenda dished the pie onto two plat
es and took them to the table. “Well, maybe you’d like to meet him tomorrow if you’ve no plans? Perhaps the three of us could go for lunch?”

Felicity humo
ured her mother by agreeing eagerly. It was obvious from the way in which her shoulders dropped in relief that she and Bill had been planning the lunch in advance. Even so, she was looking forward to meeting the man in person. From what her mother had told her, he seemed to be kind-natured and thoughtful.

Admiring the home made pie that Glen
da had set down in front of her, she felt a sense of contentment. She was happy to be home in her familiar surroundings and spending time with her mother. She just wished that Owen was there to share her experience. She knew that Glenda would love his sense of wit and depth of knowledge. She could imagine he’d laugh at the pristineness and perfection of her home, not to mention Glenda’s gentle but dozy manner.

Silently reproaching herself for daydreaming, she
pushed him out of her thoughts, instead tucking into her food and listening with growing concern as Glenda began to fill her in on Zara’s situation with Steve…

“Please babe, just listen to me. I can explain.” Dan put up his arms to protect himself as he narrowly avoided the candle burner flying through the air towards him.