Love Resisted (Entwined Hearts #2) (9 page)

An hour later and I was just thinking how to suggest going home.

“Come on let’s go across the road,” Pea whines wiggling in her seat. Since about nine o’clock she’s been saying she wanted to go to the club opposite. I think it’s some crap about having a baby soon and being a mum. It’s like she needs to sew her oats, but with nights out before the baby comes. I smile and see Saul grin too.

Con narrows his eyes at her and says, “Precious, don’t you think we should start thinking about heading home soon?”

“You go home if you want to be a grandpa, I want to dance. Fuck me, I’m not in my grave yet!” She frowns and he rolls his eyes skyward.

“Pea, you’re six months pregnant. Look at you.” He points to her stomach and it’s the wrong thing to do. He doesn’t get a chance to carry on what he was going to say because she snaps at him.

“Oh, I’m so fat that I shouldn’t be seen in public now?” She doesn’t give him a chance to answer. Instead, she grabs my arm and yanks me out of my chair
. Fuck she’s strong since she got knocked up
. She’s pulling me behind her before I know what’s happening. Turning I grab Eric and we both get pulled out of the karaoke bar. I glance behind me in time to see everyone else getting up and grabbing mine and Eric’s stuff so they can follow us. In seconds, we’re at the club entrance. Pea has dragged us to the front of the line and is telling the bouncer how he has to let us in because she’s pregnant. He doesn’t look convinced, but I think he gets sick of her bitching because he moves aside so we can enter, giving me a wink as I walk by.

We get inside and Eric announces he needs a drink immediately. We’ve just walked into the main room about to make our way to the bar when some guy puts his arm across the front of me blocking my path and causing me to come to a halt.

“Erm excuse me,” I say confused. “Can you move?” The tone of my voice doesn’t imply I’m asking.

“Just want to chat for a moment. You have a minute don’t you?” His eyes run me over and I feel my skin crawl. I watch Pea from the corner of my eye. She’s about to say something, but I shake my head telling her to be quiet because she doesn’t need to be in the thick of anything. I look back to the prick in front of me. He’s only about an inch taller than me, which puts him at five foot eleven. I know this as I have flats on today. I was only expecting to go to karaoke and not a bloody club.

I open my mouth, but before I have a chance to reply Eric does. “Figure you must be hard of hearing, the lady said move!”

The prick’s attention turns to Eric now looking at him with disgust. “I don’t need a pansy boy telling me what to do,” he snarls.

“Please don’t breathe on me, you’re bleaching my hair,” Eric replies and Pea and I start laughing…probably not the wisest thing to do, but in my defence it was funny.

“I’ll give you some advice before I lose my temper and shut you up with my fist. Why don’t you fuck off and find a pretty boy to stick his dick in your mouth, then maybe you’ll keep your trap shut.”

“He already has a fucking pretty boy limp dick,” I hear from behind me and I know Rich has just turned up. I see the prick’s eyes widen slightly before he changes back to his false bravado. He chuckles and looks behind him to his friends who move closer letting him know they have his back. Tossers. The lot of them.

“Maybe you can tell him to keep his nose out of my business then, especially when I’m trying to talk to this sexy mama.” He gestures toward me.

“Oh, my fuck. Fuckity, fuck fuck. Fucker fuck….did you just call me sexy mama? Are you high? No wait….let’s get this straight, you think you’re a Cuban drug dealer? No? What the fuck is wrong with you? Really? Do you think after stopping me and
not
moving out of my way when I asked, then being rude to my friend and very obviously a homophobe with a tiny dick that I’m going to want to talk to you? This is, of course, not even getting to the fact that you’re practically the same height as me, you’re balding on top, you have a fake tan that would make the Tango man jealous, and you have your shirt open. We’re in a club at night…it’s not that hot and neither are you!” I shut my mouth when I realise that the few people around us are actually watching the show. Noticing his jaw is tense he narrows his eyes at me.

“Listen bitch,” he says and grabs my arm.

That’s as far as he gets because Saul seems to materialise out of nowhere and rips his hand off me, pushing the guy backward with one hand while using the other to gently push me behind him. Saul spins him around and pins him to the wall whispering something in his ear. For a split second his friends go to make a move then they spot Rich, Con and Dane and decide their drinks are much more interesting.

Saul lets him go and walks back to me. “Let’s go. It’s late. We should all be getting home,” he tells us and nobody argues. As we walk out, I look at Con, who’s holding Pea and talking softly to her. Rich is talking to Eric, who’s fanning his face and looking at Rich like he wants to eat him up. Dane is striding up front as people watch our group depart.

Saul steps next to me as we walk out. “You okay?” he asks. “Yeah, I’m good. Thanks,” I reply and he nods at me.

“Good.”

“Saul.”

“Babe,” we both speak at the same time.

“You go,” he says.

Be brave.

“I want to have a chat with you when you have time…maybe this week?” I ask quietly, well as quietly as I can while walking out of a noisy club. This isn’t something I want to share with the group. Not yet.

“Yeah, that sounds good. Let me know when and I’ll come get you,” he replies.

“That’s fine, but can we make it later in the week?”

“That works,” he states. And with that we’re all outside and heading to our cars. I don’t speak as I’m getting into Dane’s car, but I stare over to Saul and find his eyes burning into me. I smile at him and know if I could have those eyes burning into me for the rest of my life then I’d die a satisfied woman.

Fuck but her smile could bring me to my knees.

I look away from her and drive off. I need to prepare what I’m going to say to her tomorrow. For so many years, I’ve pushed her away and now I want to mark her as mine. I shake my head at myself.

“You okay, bro?” Con asks and I nod at him.

I will be okay, once Soph realises she is mine. That I’ve changed and I’m worthy of her. If she doesn’t believe me, I’ll spend the rest of fucking forever proving it to her.

“Fuck!” I pace back and forth across my gym. After letting Soph get into Dane’s car tonight and watching her smile at me, I wanted to punch someone. Ever since Dane’s visit he’s taken my fucking blinkers off where Soph is concerned, and now I can’t bear watching her with anyone else. Even sitting in the passenger seat of Dane’s car like she was his to take care of had my teeth on edge.
The sooner I talk to her the better.
I might be a cocky shit assuming that one chat will make all those years of pushing her away just disappear. I’m not a moron. I know what I’ve done. I went from ignoring my feelings to not being able to switch the fucking things off. And seriously, I can’t think of her not being mine. I can’t even consider it because the thought makes me want to break something. And the idea of her being with another guy…that makes me want to break him.

I shake my body out, sweat drips down my chest. I’m much better and nearly ready to go back to Murphy’s. I walk to the corner grab my face cloth, rub myself down and head to the shower. As I’m about to leave, I snatch up my phone and decide now is as good a time as any to set this shit straight. She wanted to have a chat. Fuck knows why? But she has all the control, now I’m taking it back.

Me:
So I’ll come pick you up tomorrow. 10am.

I wait and watch, knowing I need an answer before I do anything else. My phone buzzes.

Soph:
Demanding?

I chuckle at her, even when she’s snippy she makes me smile.

Me:
Yep.

Soph:
Okay Mr. Bossy! What should I wear?

Now
there’s
a question.

Me:
Really want me to answer that babe?

Soph:
Point taken. I’ll be ready.

Me:
Good.

Soph:
So bossy and cocky.

I chuckle again and go to the shower feeling much lighter and knowing I’ll be thinking about her every second from now until tomorrow.

Shit, what the fuck is she doing to me?

I step into the shower with one thought on my mind…it’s entirely possible that she just might be my saviour.

I was trying to get my head straight knowing last night that everything had gone on long enough. I knew I needed to talk to Saul and be straight with him. Tell him how I feel and how he affects me. I need to be brave. Those words ring in my ear a lot, but lately it’s been every day. Like the universe is telling me something I already know – everything beautiful is worth fighting for – and damn it, Saul just doesn’t realise how beautiful he is, inside and out.

So when I spoke to Saul last night I was trying to give myself a few days to prepare, but then he shocked me with his text message all demanding and sexy as hell. Yeah, he can be sexy just by texting me.
Fuck, but there must be something wrong with me.

Now I’m flapping not knowing exactly what I need to say to him or how things are going to go.

It’s nearly 10 o’clock and he’ll be here soon.

“Chill out, Tink,” I hear from the left as Dane is walking down the stairs. Low slung pyjama bottoms, muscular arms and sculpted chest. His eyes are sleepy and he has a sweet grin on his face. His hair is still ruffled from sleep.

Some
woman is going to be a lucky bitch one day.

“Shhh, you!” I snap back which just makes him chuckle and walk off toward the kitchen. The doorbell rings and I jump but can’t move. I hear chuckling again as Dane walks past me and opens the door.

“Fuck, can’t you put a top on?” I hear Saul growl and then Dane full out laughs and answers with, “Dick.” He opens the door wider and walks back to the kitchen with a knowing smirk, but not before walking past me and leaning in low to whisper in my ear, “Be brave, Tink.”

I smile at Saul and his eyes light with something, but I’m not sure what. “Come on babe, let’s go,” he says holding out his hand. I grasp it and walk with him, but I fidget. I’ve never held his hand before, not in an intimate way. Maybe when we were kids and he was pulling me out of trouble, or when we were adults and he was again pulling me out of trouble, but never just
because
.

Fuck, is this a date?

The thought hadn’t occurred to me before now. Shaking my head slightly, dismissing the idea. Still fidgeting, it’s like the walk from the house to his car is a mile instead of about ten feet.

“What’s up? Why are you fidgeting?” Saul asks cutting off my overactive brain.

“Oh, ugh…well, it’s just…that you’ve never held my hand before.”

He stops and looks at me then down at our joined hands, then he smirks and winks. “Get in the car, Soph,” he says opening the door, and I do so even more confused.

Ten minutes into our journey and Saul hasn’t said anything, and I’m even more fidgety than ever.

“Where are we going?” I ask breaking the silence.

He looks over at me with warmth in his eyes. “You’ll see,” he says and looks back to the road.

Another ten minutes and we turn down a street I recognise and catch my breath trying not to let tears form in my eyes. Saul must sense it as he places his hand on my knee and rubs his thumb up and down gently.

When he stops the car, I have myself under control. Almost. He doesn’t get out. Instead, he turns to me and says, “When we were younger your dad used to bring you here about three times a week, right?” I nod to answer and he continues, “I know how much you loved to dance and even though I was a kid I could see how much your dad loved you. When he died your mother stopped you coming, right?” Nodding again, he clenches his jaw. “That bitch shouldn’t have been allowed to keep you,” he says and I look down at my fisted hands, my nails biting into the palms.

He has no idea.

“Anyway, I know how much you’ve always loved to dance. I know you tried to do what you could in your bedroom, but I also know what a special place this dance studio is to you. I don’t know why you haven’t come back, I can only guess it’s because your dad still lives in your memories here, and you would find it hard to come on your own?”

This time my head jerks at his question. Not because it’s wrong, but because it’s smack on the money.

How the fuck he knows that I have no idea.

“How do you know that?” I whisper my question.

He cups my face and runs his thumb down my cheek. “Because I know you, Soph.” He must see a million questions blaze in my eyes because he smiles and lays himself bare. “You know what my mother was like?” He doesn’t wait for my nod, it’s not really a question he’s asking as he knows the answer. “We both had to grow up quickly, neither of us really being allowed to have a childhood. I don’t know everything that happened to you and likewise you don’t know what has happened to me, but we have time to find out. We have time to talk, to laugh, to cry, to heal. We have time to love, Soph.”

My eyes widen and find his.

He gazes softly at me. “I’ve never thought I was good enough for you.”

I feel my eyebrows pull in and my lips narrow at his ridiculous assumption.

“I’ve been your friend, determined to make sure you’re always okay. To make sure you always have us, Con, Pea and me. I was never willing to try to make anything more. Sometimes I sit and wonder why I was such a fuckwit? Why I wasted so much time? You know before the accident, Kate told me she thought she was pregnant.”

I feel my body jolt and my heart constricts. I remember Kate. I haven’t seen her for ages. Fuck! I hope she wasn’t pregnant.

“She wasn’t,” he says almost reading my thoughts. “Then Con and Pea got pregnant, it just makes you think.” He looks forward out of the window and so do I. It’s started raining and the sky is growing dark. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about things while I was in the hospital, but it took a chat with someone unexpected to wake me the fuck up.”

Dane.

He turns to me, his eyes haunted.
“I never wanted to taint you, do you get that?” I look down at my clenched hands again knowing it would be me tainting him, but also knowing I’m too selfish to say no to almost anything he proposes. “Then I couldn’t bear the idea of you being with someone else. It’s like a switch inside me flipped when I was in that hospital, and everything I suppressed for so long was bubbling to the surface.” He shakes his head and rubs the back of his neck. “I wanted to bring you here today as they have a show on later. But before the show, I thought maybe you could dance and I could be here with you. So you’re not alone. Maybe you’ll be okay knowing someone who loves you is here ready to pick you up if you fall.” He cups my face again as tears well in my eyes, but I still don’t let them fall. Instead, I nod my head at him and we get out of the car. He grabs a holdall from the back seat and I realise he has dance kit for me.

Fuck knows where he got it from?
Still, I need to do this. I need to prove to myself that I can.

Within thirty-five minutes I’m changed, warmed up and ready to dance. It’s only Saul and me in the room. I look through the music in the CD collection and spot something I used to dance to all the time. Something that pulls at my heart strings. Something that I used to dance to in my bedroom or in the school hall, if nobody was around and think of Saul – ‘Everytime’ by Brittney Spears. I close my eyes but instead of thinking about Saul it takes me right back there.

I put the next track on and closed my eyes waiting for it to start. The music chilled me, but also flowed through me. I always thought of Saul when I danced. It was him or Dad, but at least with him I had time. I moved back and then spun rounding out my body and throwing out my arms. I caught the bookshelf with my hand and cursed, “Fuck!” I clutched my hand and it throbbed. I needed to go downstairs and grab some ice to soothe it, but I knew mother had company.

I sat on my bed and switched off my music. “Ouch,” I grasped my hand again, it was seriously stinging. Deciding to be really quiet and hopefully nobody noticing me, I unlocked my bedroom door and opened it thanking my stars that the door was silent. Slowly I made my way to the top of the stairs and looked down seeing if I could place where people were. It sounded like they were all in the back room. If I were quick, I could scoot into the kitchen grab a tea towel and some ice and be back in my bedroom with the door locked in minutes.