Lovers at Heart (14 page)

Kaylie let out a dreamy breath. “Isn’t that the greatest feeling? That instant when you know someone recognizes that you’re something more than what anyone else sees? I remember that with Chaz.”

“Hey, we’re talking about me here. Focus,” Max teased. “Anyway, that afternoon before the rehearsal dinner, I went down to the lobby and basically hung out, hoping I’d see him. When he wasn’t anywhere in sight, I went outside and walked around the grounds. Did you know there were three pools, not just one? That place was amazing. Anyway, I ended up on the beach, where I met Justin, and he asked me out.” She took a drink, building up her defenses for what she had to tell Kaylie and how it would make her feel to say it aloud. She didn’t want pity from her. She needed answers, and relationships weren’t like logistics. She could navigate logistics with her eyes closed.

“Treat saw me the next morning. He thought I had slept with Justin, I guess. I didn’t really know what he thought at the time, but it was pretty obvious that he thought I was a whore.”

“Max!” Kaylie gasped. “No, you’re wrong. You have to be. Everyone has a one-night stand at some point, and I’m sure Treat’s had many.”

“I never have,” she admitted.

“Wait. Never, as in
never
, never?”

Max shook her head. “Not once, and not that night either.”

“We’ll talk about that after. Wow. Okay, let’s figure this out first. So what did Treat say?”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing?”

“Nope. It was how he looked at me, like I was dirty.” She lowered her voice. “Like I was cheap and slutty. You know how a guy can look down at you and you know just what he’s thinking?” Max touched the end of her hair, then dropped her hands to her lap, and finally, crossed her arms to guard her heart from reliving the pain all over again.

“Oh, yeah. I know that look all too well, but unlike you, I give it right back with a quick retort that takes them to their knees.”

Max smiled. “Yeah, you would.”

“But that’s me, not you. Oh, Maxy. I’m so sorry. What did you say? Please tell me you said something to him to straighten him out.”

Max shook her head. “I wouldn’t even know what to say. I’ve never been in that situation before. I think I just blushed like a child and looked down at the floor. That’s kind of my normal go-to reaction with anything uncomfortable besides work.”

“I can’t even imagine how you must have felt. I mean, I’ve seen you rip people to shreds in a business environment. No offense or anything, but you get shit done and you don’t take any flack. You know, I guess this just shows us how multifaceted you are. You’re a ballbuster at work, a seductress in the bedroom, and a sensitive kitten at heart.” She brushed a strand of hair that had come loose from Max’s ponytail from her face. “Max, you must really care about him.”

“I think I do,” she admitted. “But I don’t want to be treated like that by anyone ever again.” She’d never told Kaylie about her ex-boyfriend who made her feel worthless every single day for months on end. Until one night when his verbal abuse had taken a turn for the worse and he’d done things to her that she couldn’t even think about. He’d grabbed her so roughly that she’d had bruises on her wrist for a week. Max had a good relationship with her mother, but her mother was of the mind-set that women didn’t share the trials and tribulations of one’s relationships. Because of that, when it came to her boyfriends, Max had never confided in her mother—in good times or in bad. And when Max had answered the phone crying the evening her boyfriend had done those terrible things to her, she’d been unable to put two sentences together, and her mother hadn’t even asked what had gone so wrong. With the space that always felt so empty between them, Max hadn’t expected her mother to be able to interpret her sobs; yet somehow she had. Her mother had two words for her:
Get out
. That was the night Max packed her bags and drove halfway across the country, leaving that weak persona, and—she’d thought—that broken girl, behind.

Luckily, Kaylie didn’t ask whether she’d ever been treated like that before. She assumed that Max had been referring to that one look from Treat.

“And you shouldn’t ever have to,” Kaylie said, pulling Max into a hug.

Max wiped the tears that had filled the corners of her eyes. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be a buzzkill.”

“Who’re you kidding? You’re not a buzzkill. A buzzkill is sending a guy out in the middle of the night mid-you-know-what.” She smiled.

“Yeah, about that. That night before we…moved into the bedroom, he was trying to apologize, but I didn’t want to hear it. I was afraid I’d just get pissed off and, Kaylie, I wanted him so badly. I’ve never wanted anyone or anything as much as I wanted to be with him in that way.”

“That’s love, girl. I mean, there’s horny sex and then there’s love. Were you thinking about what you wanted to get done after he left?” Kaylie’s eyes were serious, contemplative.

“No. I couldn’t think past my next breath.”

“Were you comparing him to your other lovers?”

“I can count them all on one hand, and no. I seriously couldn’t think. I could barely speak.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “And it made me do things that I’d never initiate with anyone else.”

“Yup, that’s how you know. So, did he ever get to apologize? I mean, what pissed you off so badly that you had to kick him out? I’m still missing something.”

Max pulled her shoulders back and said, “I couldn’t push the image of that look away. It’s stupid, and I know that, but I didn’t want to be treated like that in the future, and even though he did all the right things and said things that made my toes curl, I just didn’t want to take the chance. So the wall came right back up. Brick and mortar, ten feet high. There was no way he was getting through.”

“Girl, you’re harsh.” Kaylie shook her head. “Did he get pissed?”

Max shook her head. “He was gracious. I think he really wanted to talk, like he was having sex with me because I pushed it, but he’d rather have talked things through first. And then he showed up at work last night, but you know that already.”

“That was good, right? I thought it was so romantic.”

“Yeah, it was.” Max smiled, thinking about their walk and the dinner they’d shared. “He told me stuff that he’s never told anyone else.”

“If he really and truly did not do one of those…” She lowered her voice an octave. “
Oh yeah, baby, you tell me, I’ll tell you
kind of things, where you know they’re just trying to get into your pants, then that’s a really clear indicator that he’s feeling for you what you’re feeling for him.”

“I know.” Max dug into her purse and pulled out the two handwritten notes from Treat. “I was an idiot. I didn’t really react to what he told me. I think I was too shocked. When I got home, these were in a bag on my doorknob. He’d put them there before we had dinner, and he showed up to take them after dinner, but I was already there.” She shrugged. “And then he said goodbye before I read them. Only I didn’t realize he meant
goodbye
, goodbye.”

Kaylie read the notes. “Oh, Max. Where is he now?”

“I don’t know. He left town in the middle of the night.”

“You broke his little heart,” Kaylie said. She must have noticed the hurt in Max’s eyes about the realization of Treat’s hasty departure. “We have to find him. You have to go to him.”

Max shook her head. “I don’t know. I’m sort of thinking about going away for a few days to figure things out. He told me that his favorite place was Wellfleet in Cape Cod, and I’ve never been. So I was thinking I’d go there, and…” She shrugged. “Maybe fate will step in, maybe not.”
Fate?
Had she really said fate? She had, and the more she thought about fate, the more she wondered about it. Maybe it was fate that had brought them together in the first place, at the gates of the festival, and maybe fate could step in again. Max hadn’t even been thinking about going to the Cape until the words left her lips, and now, the more she thought about going, the more right it felt. Even if she didn’t see Treat, it would help her to figure out where her heart stood on the whole matter—though now that she knew where she was heading, every bit of her hoped fate would step in and show her the way.

Kaylie groaned. “Has my sister gotten to you? Danica is all about fate and destiny.” She rolled her eyes. “I believe in lusty love and creating your life. Listen, you have to make this happen. Find out where he is first and then go see him. Don’t chance it, counting on fate. Otherwise, you’ll never know what could have happened. He’ll always be the one who got away.”

Max wasn’t listening. She’d already moved on to the romantic notion of the Cape. “Do you think Chaz will give me the week off?”

“What? You’re seriously considering this? Are you going to call him?”

She’d almost forgotten that she had his number. “Nope. Something tells me that I need to do this on my own. If fate doesn’t step in, then it doesn’t, but at least this time I’ll be following my heart without anything holding me back.”

“Who are you and what have you done with my Max?” Kaylie asked.

Max’s eyes grew wide. “Do you think Chaz would mind? It’s only four workdays, since we’re closed today. I haven’t taken a sick day in…well, I’ve taken three in the eight years I’ve worked there, and I never take vacation, except a few days here and there to visit my parents.” Her mind spun with hope.

“Who are you kidding? Chaz is a romantic. If I tell him why you’re going, he’ll drive you there himself. In fact, here.” Kaylie dug her wallet out of her purse and handed Max her airline frequent-flyer card. “Use our account and you can fly practically free with Chaz’s frequent-flyer miles.”

Max’s eyes lit up. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, of course. We have too many to ever use anyway. Just log into our account, and make sure when you book it that the actual ticket is in your name. If they need me to call and confirm the purchase, just let me know.”

Max hugged her. “You’re a saint! Thank you! I’ll call Chaz as soon as we leave here, just so he also hears it from me. I need to ask him, even if he tells you it’s okay, right?” She didn’t wait for Kaylie to answer. “Of course I do. It’s the right thing to do.”
Just like going to Wellfleet. It feels right
.

They paid the bill and headed out of the restaurant.

“Kaylie, do you think I’m being stupid? I mean, the guy owns a zillion resorts. He could be anywhere in the world.”

“Yes, I think you are one hundred percent wacked out of your mind, but if I were Danica, I’d be gushing and telling you how you are doing the right thing and that the spirit gods are all on your side!” She shook her head. “Or some crazy shit like that.”

AFTER CHAZ APPROVED her time off, confirming Kaylie’s suspicion that he would do anything for love, Max had a hell of a time finding connecting flights into Hyannis, Massachusetts. She booked her flight for the ungodly hour of three in the morning and packed her bags.
This trip is about fate and love and nothing more
. There would be no planning or scheming. No worrying about what others thought or pretending to be something she wasn’t. She turned off her cell phone and tucked it into her purse. Three days. She’d give herself three days to figure things out without any disruptions, including phone calls. Treat hadn’t called her since he left, and she didn’t need the added stress of wondering if he ever would. For the next few days, her phone—and Max herself—were on hiatus. If fate didn’t step in, then it wasn’t meant to be. With that decided, she spent the rest of the afternoon napping and reading and trying not to think about the romantic fantasy she was wrapping herself up in like a security blanket.

TREAT HAD THOUGHT about calling Max at least a million times since he’d woken up Monday morning, but he’d promised himself that he wouldn’t pressure her into a relationship, and he was sticking to his guns, no matter how hard it was proving to be.

He ate breakfast on the deck and called Savannah as he drank his coffee.

“I’ve left you at least a dozen messages,” she said when she answered the phone.

“Fifteen, to be exact,” he said with a smile. “I’m sorry I didn’t call right away.”

“Sure you are.”

“Vanny, I just needed some time.” He hadn’t called his sister by her nickname since she was a kid, and he had no idea why it had come out of his mouth right then.

“Are you okay? Where are you?” she asked.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” He heard the lie in his own voice. “I’m at the Cape.”

“Did you listen to my messages?”

He hadn’t listened to them because he wasn’t in the mood to hear her begging him to call her, but he didn’t want to hurt her feelings. “Yeah.”

“You’re a liar.” Her tone was matter-of-fact, not angry. “Wanna know how I know?”

“Because you know me better than I know myself sometimes?”

“Oh, Treat. You sound so…empty.”

More than you know
.

“I know you didn’t listen to my messages because if you had, you’d have been on the first plane back here.”

What is she up to now?
Treat had a startling thought. “What happened? Is it Dad?”

“No, it’s not Dad, you idiot. If something happened to Dad, I would have tracked you down instead of sleeping at night. It’s Max.”