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Authors: Rhonda Dennis

Tags: #Literature & Fiction, #Humor & Satire, #Humorous, #Romance, #Contemporary, #Romantic Comedy, #General Humor

Magnolia Blossoms (9 page)

BOOK: Magnolia Blossoms
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“Just tell him what you want from him. He’s looking. Go!” She pushes me again, but this time she makes a shooing motion with her hands when I look back. “Now,” she mouths.

I nod and mouth back, “Okay!”

My heart is thudding in my chest as I approach him. He straightens up when he realizes I’m making my way in his direction. “Hi. How are you tonight?” he asks in a silky smooth voice. All I can do is giggle nervously. His smile grows broader. “You looking for a good time, sweetheart?”

I giggle some more. “Yes. Sort of. I’m sorry. I’m new at this. My friend suggested I do this because I’m not really all that experienced, and she thinks that paying someone will help me to gain some confidence.”

With one step, he self-assuredly plants himself inches from my lips. “I’m here for you, baby. All we need to do is work out the technical stuff. You okay with paying?”

I nod. “Yep, she sent me with some money.”

“Good. Good. Anything specific you wanna request before we set a price?”

“Tongue. She said I should make sure you know I want you to use your tongue.”

“Ahhh, some oral gratification. I see,” he says with a broad smile. “I’m an expert at that.” He provocatively licks his lips, and I get the urge to pee my pants. “How much you got there, sweetheart?”

“She said I should start with five.”

“Five. Five’s fair, I suppose. How long do you see this lasting?”

“Uh, maybe five or ten minutes?” I guess.

“Give me some credit now. Darlin, I can go all night for eight.”

“I don’t think I need all night. She said she just wants me to experience it this way first, and then I can move on to finding a real boyfriend.”

“First? Like you mean you never?” he grins broadly. “Well, I must say that I’m flattered. Tell you what, I’ll give it to you half off. Four, and I promise that I’ll use lots and lots of tongue all night long.” He leans in close enough to flick my earlobe with his tongue, and my breath catches in my chest.

“Yes. Four, okay. Do you have change?”

“Always,” he breathes into my ear. “You know what else I have?”

“What?” I barely choke out.

“Handcuffs.” I feel the cold steel bracelet brush up against my wrist, and by the time I fully register what’s going on, my hands are secured behind me. “You’re under arrest for solicitation of prostitution. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney and to have him or her present with you while you’re being questioned. If you can’t afford one, one can be appointed to you before questioning if you’d like. You can exercise these rights anytime you wish. Do you understand your rights?”

“Wait. What? I didn’t ask you to sleep with me! You were only supposed to make out with me. That’s not prostitution—is it? Did they change the definition of prostitution? What about people who run kissing booths? Are they illegal now?” I ask, spinning around to try to face him.

“Stay as you are,” he says, pulling a neck badge from underneath his shirt so it hangs against his chest. Honey comes dashing up to us.

“What in the hell’s going on?”

“Well, if it isn’t Honey LeReaux. A little far from home, aren’t you? Whatcha doing down on this end?”

“Fuckin’ Nick. I didn’t recognize you. I guess I need to invest in some glasses. Why is she under arrest? That girl ain’t done a bad deed in her life.”

“Well, there was that time I thought about…” Honey shoots me death daggers, so I censor myself.

“Give it a rest, Honey. I got everything I need to make the arrest. There isn’t a person around that’s going to pay someone four hundred dollars for a make out session.”

I whip my head around. “Four
hundred
dollars! I thought you meant four dollars!”

“Four dollars? Lady, please. I don’t have time for this nonsense.”

“She’s telling you the truth. Check her pockets to see how much money she’s carrying.”

“Any guns, needles, or weapons I should know about before I search you?” he asks.

“No.” After swallowing a large gulp of air, I give Honey a look of sheer terror.

“Well, I’m glad to see you’re staying true to your name,” Honey spews.

He stops emptying my pockets long enough to give her a derisive look. “Care to elaborate?”

“Nick the Dick. That’s what everyone calls you. Even your coworkers.”

He throws his head back as a hearty laugh escapes him. “You know what? They’re right. Step out of your shoes please, ma’am,” he directs at me.

“You’ll have to unzip the boots for me. I can’t just slide them off,” I say.

“No funny business. Understand?” I nervously nod my head, and he stoops to make quick work of unzipping them. Once I kick them off, he gives Honey a wily smile. “Your story just fell to pieces.” He holds up a few hundred dollar bills I have stuffed in my shoe. Honey glares at me.

“You took my twenty bucks, and you had hundreds stuffed in your boot?”

“I was gonna give it back to you,” I say defensively.

“Even so, you have to know that she wasn’t looking for no sex,” Honey interjects.

“I told her I’d do her for four, and she accepted,” Nick asserts.

“All she accepted was a make out session for four dollars, and now that I know who you are, I think that’s about three dollars and seventy five cents too much,” Honey says.

“How old are you? Late twenties, early thirties?” he looks my way. I nod. “And you seriously expect me to believe that in all those years you’ve never kissed anyone. Does it look like I have stupid written across my forehead, ladies? You two need to come up with better stories.”

“It’s the truth. I got to hear the whole pathetic story this evening,” Honey pipes in.

“Honey! Feelings!” I say.

“Save it for the judge, you two. One-five-four, send in the unmarked,” Nick says into his sleeve. When the police car stops in front of us, I lose it.

“No! I can’t go to jail. Big Daddy’s gonna kill me.” I let out a high-pitched wail. “Please, Mister Dick. Please don’t make me go to jail. I’ll never ask anyone for a kiss again. I swear.”

“The name’s Nick, and it’s out of my hands now. Who in the hell is Big Daddy?”

“Muh-muh-my father, Murray Berrybush.”

“Whoa shit. Your dad is Murray Berrybush?” Nick asks in between laughs. “I love that dude. I know I shouldn’t because he makes a living trying to get the scum we arrest off their charges, but damned if he doesn’t make going to court fun. Please tell me your dad is going to represent you.”

“I probably won’t make it to court since he’s going to kill me,” I say in between sobs. “Please, please rethink this. I can’t be arrested.”

“You
are
arrested, now watch your head when getting in the car,” he says.

“Gimme the money you had in your boot, and hopefully it’ll be enough to spring you from jail,” Honey requests.

Nick looks my way, and I nod my approval. He hands the bills over to her, and she disappears into the night. “Chances are you just lost that money.”

“Honey wouldn’t do that to me. She’s my friend,” I say, my sobs easing to sniffles.

“So how does the daughter of a notable lawyer end up being friends with a washed-up hooker from the projects? I think there’s a pretty damned good story wrapped up in there, Ms. Berrybush. Magnolia,” he says, eyeing my ID. “Seriously? Your name is Magnolia Picasso Berrybush? This isn’t a fake?”

“No, it’s not a fake! It’s my name. You’ve picked on my inexperience, you’ve picked on my choice of friends, and now you’re picking on my name. Anything else you’d like to belittle me about before bringing me in to ruin my life?”

“Darlin’, you did the ruining. I did my job.”

“I very strongly dislike you,” I say with a huff.

“I wouldn’t guess that with the way your knees buckled when I promised you lots of tongue.” He closes the door, bangs on the roof, and blows me a kiss as the officer drives me to the station for processing. How can someone so unbelievably good-looking be so damned mean?

 

 

Chapter Ten

“So I was able to scrounge up enough money to get ya out. I tried talking to the ADA, but it got me nowhere. They won’t take the word of a working girl. I’m really sorry I got ya into this mess. I hope you know that my intentions were good,” Honey claims as we’re leaving the police station.

I’m given a court date two weeks away, so I figure it gives me a week and six days to come up with a plan to save my hide. If Honey was able to talk to the people in the district attorney’s office, then maybe I can, too? If I go in calmly and tell them about the misunderstanding, maybe the charges can be dropped, and Big Daddy will be none the wiser. It’s the hope that I’m going to cling to; the other option is far too scary to consider.

Honey offers to drop me off at home, but I remember my scooter in the cemetery. She goes home to rest, and I set off on foot to retrieve my wheels. Luckily, it’s right where I left it, and better yet, it’s full daylight so a lot of the creepy factor of being in a cemetery is gone. My intentions are to get some rest, as well, but despite the long, emotionally draining night and the super long walk, there’s no way I’m going to sleep. Maybe a few laps around the park might clear my head and help me to relax some?

As near as I can tell, the park looks deserted, but after giving it a little thought, it only stands to reason that it should be. Six in the morning is pretty early for the kiddies to be swinging and sliding. Completely zoning out, I take a long stroll past the playground equipment and wind up on a paved jogging trail.

After following it for a few minutes, I’m suddenly aware that it’s much darker, and I’m now in a thicket of trees. Crunching and popping sounds come from all around. Spinning quickly, I search for the source of the commotion, but I see nothing. My heart begins pounding in my chest, and my mouth goes dry.

The noises sound like they’re coming from my right, then my left, then behind me. I grow dizzy from trying to track their source. Putting my head in my hands, I hope to regain my equilibrium. Instead, I’m knocked flat on my ass and left struggling for breath.

“Where did you come from? I’m so sorry! I was running, and thought I was alone… Magnolia?” the male voice asks.

I wipe away some of the tears that have welled in my eyes. “Jace?” I try to say. It sounds more like a raggedy exhale.

“Yeah, it’s me,” he says, squatting beside me. “Where does it hurt?”

“Everywhere,” I answer, trying to get back on my feet.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Stay as you are until I’m sure you’re okay. I used to play football, so I know how disorienting a solid hit can be.”

Nodding, I allow myself to fall back onto my rear, and I carefully stretch out on the path under the trees. Jace looks on with concern, so I try to allay his fears. “I’m okay. I don’t think you caused any permanent damage.”

“You sure about that?” he asks. Damn, he looks good in his dark blue running shorts and white Nike t-shirt.

“Pretty sure.”

He seems to accept the answer, and in an unexpected turn of events, he lies on the ground next to me. “Rough night?”

“Actually, yes. Why do you ask?”

“Lucky guess.”

“Did you have a rough night, too?”

“Very,” Jace answers.

“I’m sorry. Work?”

“Yep.”

“Want to tell me about it?” I inquire.

He props up on an elbow. “I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.”

“I don’t think that’s a very fair trade off.”

“Why not?” he asks with a slight chuckle. I give him a half-hearted shoulder shrug. “That’s okay. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. Mine isn’t all that interesting. We ran a bad call last night, and I find that going for a run helps with the stress.”

“What happened?”

He puts his hands under his head and stares up at the tree tops where rays of sunlight are just starting to peep through. “A teenager died last night. It wasn’t some unavoidable car accident or a chronic illness that he’d been battling all his life that killed him; it was stupidity. Instead of waking up and heading off to school, he’s on a metal table getting reconstructed for his funeral while his family suffers from the grief of it all.”

This time I prop up on my elbow. “That’s terrible. Reconstructed?” I asked.

“That’s what happens when you accept a dare to jump from the roof of one three-story building to another but misjudge the distance and pin ball off of obstacles all the way to the ground.”

I begin to feel woozy, so I lie back down. “How terrible.”

Jace rolls to look at me. “I’m sorry. I should’ve censored some of the details. If I’m discussing a call, it’s usually with other medical personnel. I wasn’t thinking.”

“It’s okay. I’m fine. I’m just sorry that you had to experience that.”

“It’s part of the job,” he says. “Now, you tell me about your night.”

I sit up and cross my legs then nervously pick through the twigs and leaves on the ground. Jace smiles at me. “That bad, huh? Come on. Tell me. You’ll feel better. I feel better since I’ve told you about my night. What kind of wild mayhem went down?”

“How do you know that my night was wild? Maybe it was just long and boring.”

“Just a guess. Plus, you only have one eyebrow drawn on your face. There has to be one hell of a story there.” I reach up to touch my right brow bone. Jace shakes his head. “The other one.”

I’m still not sure why I’m feeling around, there is nothing to touch but a thin layer of eye pencil. “I met a woman last night.”

“Really? That’s great. I hope you two are good for each other,” Jace says with sincerity.

“What? Jace, I’m not gay. Not that there’s anything wrong with being gay, but I’m attracted to men.”

“But your apartment? The breasts everywhere? I thought you…”

“The boobs are my potentials. After I find a pair I like, I stick them up there for when I finally consult with a surgeon.”

“Well, you’ve accumulated quite the collection there. Frat boys everywhere would be jealous of that boob wall.”

I laugh loudly, startling myself when it comes forth. I toss my hand over my mouth. “I haven’t done that in a long time.”

“Hang hot knockers on your wall?”

I laugh again, and this time it feels less foreign. “No, silly. Laugh.”

Jace’s brows furrow. “Really? Come on. Not even for a TV show? Nothing has amused you recently? Not one tiny little thing?”

I shake my head.

“Well, that’s a shame. You should definitely consider renting a comedy every now and again. Laughter is good for the soul.”

“I’ll start doing that,” I say with a smile. I begin to sit up again, but Jace nudges me back down.

“Oh, no. You didn’t finish telling me about your night.”

Reluctantly, I close my eyes while telling him the story, as if my not being able to see him somehow makes me less visible. “The lady I met last night is a hooker named Honey, who despite her good intentions, helped me to get arrested for soliciting a male prostitute who turned out to be an undercover cop.”

Jace is completely silent for about a minute. “Is there more to the story?”

“Oh yeah,” I say. He breathes out a sigh. “I wasn’t actually propositioning him for sex; he just misconstrued it as such.”

Jace looks utterly confused. “What
were
you propositioning him for, Magnolia?”

A lump forms in my throat, and despite my best efforts, my lower lip trembles. A tear slowly rolls down my cheek. “It was only supposed to be a kiss. I told Honey that I’d never been with a man before, and when she found out that included never having kissed a man before, she insisted on paying a male prostitute a few dollars to show me how it’s done. The guy started talking numbers like four and eight. How was I supposed to know he was talking hundreds, not dollars? It was a big mess, and he turned out to be some undercover cop named Nick. I was hauled in to the station, booked, and let go this morning.”

“Nick the Dick?” Jace asks.

I nod. “He a friend of yours?”

“Not exactly. I’ve run into him a few times on different calls. His nickname is fitting.”

“He said there is no way he’d ever believe that a thirty-two year old woman had never been kissed, and he laughed when he found out who my father is. He’s actually excited to see him in court. I don’t even know if Big Daddy will defend me.” Covering my face with my hands, I start to sob.

“Didn’t you have a boyfriend when I picked up those patients from your house?” Jace queries.

“He was my boyfriend for a total of twenty minutes, and I don’t think what he did was kissing.”

“What did he do?” Jace asks with a smile.

“He kinda lapped at my face like a dog licking peanut butter from a spoon.”

Jace roars with laughter. “No, that’s not kissing.”

“I knew you’d laugh at me. Ha! Ha! It’s so hilarious,” I say with sarcasm.

Jace struggles with it a bit, but he finally grows serious. “I’m not laughing at you; I’m laughing at him. Although, like Nick, I’m finding it hard to believe that you’ve never been kissed.”

“I used to look worse than this,” I say.

“What are you talking about? Worse?”

“That day you found me in the art shop with my face smashed in, this is the before.” I scroll through a few photos on my phone before I find the one I’d shared with Honey.

“And?” he asks.

“Look at me! My teeth are hideous, my nose is disgusting. I’m nothing but skin and bones…”

“Stop,” Jace says. “It’s obvious from the picture that you have some prominent features, but you know what stands out the most to me?”

“The teeth? They were repulsive.”

“The dullness in your eyes.”

“Seriously?” I ask, turning the phone so I can see the screen.

Jace rolls to a position where he can see my face. “Yes. It’s as though I can see just how broken your spirit was. You may think that all of these things happening to you are negative, but they seem to have put a fire in your eyes that obviously wasn’t there before.”

“I wasn’t expecting to hear that one,” I say with an uncomfortable grimace.

“It’s the truth.”

I don’t know what to say in response, so I quietly admire the view above.

“I could fix that for you if you want me to,” Jace says after a minute or so.

“Fix what?”

“I could kiss you, and then you won’t have to pay some stranger to do it.”

My heart starts to flutter. “But your girlfriend…”

“I’m offering to give you your first kiss, not marry you, Magnolia. Besides, I’m in between girlfriends right now.”

“But, that lady at urgent care was so pretty, and she seemed nice.”

“She was, and still is, but we didn’t click. That happens a lot with me. I don’t generally date a person very long, and we’re getting off topic. Do you want me to kiss you?”

My breathing begins to quicken, and my palms sweat. “I have
zero
experience when it comes to this stuff. Maybe it’s best to leave it to a professional. I might be so bad at it that it could turn you off of women forever. Not to mention, I can’t imagine making a bigger fool of myself than I’ve already done, but I know it’s possible, so why take the chance, right?”

“Mags,” Jace softly says while lightly palming the back of my neck.

“Yes,” I eke out while gazing into his mesmerizing crystal blue eyes.

“Hush.” His look says it all. He is calm, self-assured, and holy shit! He’s going to kiss me! My inner teenager is squealing for joy, whilst my adult-self quivers uncontrollably. I’m incredibly thankful that we’re still lying on the ground. “Don’t be nervous,” he whispers.

He edges closer and closer to me; his face so close to mine that I feel his breath on my lips. He gives a palpitation inducing grin as he closes his eyes, so I follow suit and close mine, too. His mouth melds with mine, his lips perfectly fitting into the ridges of mine. He softly strokes my lower lip with the tip of his tongue before firmly pressing it between them to part them. Once I open my mouth, he deepens the kiss. Sensations that I’ve never come close to imagining flood my senses, and I feel as though I’m floating. Kissing a living, breathing human is
nothing
like kissing a blow up doll. Jace pulls away slightly and after seeing the cockeyed grin on my face, tenderly leaves me with two more brief, yet powerful kisses before he sits up.

“Was that okay for a first kiss?” Jace asks with a smile.

I’m still not able to talk, so I simply nod.

“You remember what I did with my tongue?” he asks. Again, I nod. “It’s not just a guy thing. You’re free to experiment with that, too. It might feel awkward at first, but you’ll get it. Come on. Try it once with me.”

“No!” I squeak. “I mean, I can’t. No.”

“Wouldn’t you prefer to try it out here with a friend rather than in the midst of a hot date?”

“I don’t really foresee any hot dates in my future, but I see the merit in your suggestion. Are you sure you don’t mind?”

BOOK: Magnolia Blossoms
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