Malice (6 page)

He was quiet for a moment before saying, “Of course I’m always reading. What else do I have to do to pass the time?”

I didn’t know what to say to that. I hadn’t realized how much it bothered him. I had assumed he wanted it that way. As I pulled into the school parking lot, my mind was whirling trying to come up with something meaningful to say.

“Look, we both know that the only reason that we’re even friends is because of your mom and my grandma. It’s because we spent so much time at your house, helping your mom out. They kind of pushed a friendship on us from the time we were kids.”

A hurt little whimper escaped my lips. I shot him a look that I hoped told him that was a rotten thing to say. He flinched slightly and shook his head.

“I didn’t mean that the way it sounded,” he muttered. “It came out wrong. I just meant that if we’d only ever seen each other at school, you would be like everyone else. You wouldn’t want anything to do with me either.”

I put my car into park and turned to look at him. Usually Tristan was so composed. Today he was far from it. It was unsettling. I’d never seen this side of him. I’d had no idea that he felt so insecure. He seemed so vulnerable.

“I’m friends with you because I
like
you,” I said firmly. “I like you a lot. I like you because I know you. Other people? They just need to get the chance to know you.”

“Julie’s the first person, aside from you, that actually
wants
to be my friend. And you just about scared her away,” he accused.

Back to her again?

I bit my lip because I didn’t know what else to say. I’d already apologized. I was willing to repeat myself but I was pretty sure Tristan wasn’t willing to listen. At least, not yet.

“I’m not asking you to be friends with her. I’m not even asking you to try to like her. I mean, I wouldn’t be opposed to either of those things. But if you can’t do that, then what I am asking, is that you stay away from her.”

He leaned forward, scooping up the strap of his backpack before directing his attention to me again.

I forced a smile onto my face. “That won’t be a problem.”

He nodded, looking relieved, as if he thought I’d give him a hard time about this. Then his gaze swung around to look out the windshield. I followed his line of sight. Julie was standing at the edge of the parking lot on the sidewalk. Her school bag was slung over her shoulder. She was fidgeting with the strap as she cast a hesitant glance our way.

“I’ve gotta go,” he said as he reached for his door handle. “But is everything okay with us?”

Funny, I felt like I should be the one asking that question.

I hoped my smile didn’t look as forced as it felt. “Yeah, yes, everything is fine.”

“Okay, then,” he said as he flung his door open. “See you later.”

“See you,” I murmured as his door swung shut again.

I watched as he moved across the parking lot to where Julie waited for him. Maybe it was my imagination but he looked like maybe he was standing just a bit taller today. Like maybe he was feeling just a little more confident. It annoyed me that Julie made him feel that way when clearly, I never had. Then I felt bad for thinking that. If Tristan was feeling better about himself, that was a good thing. Regardless of who brought about that change.

Her pretty smile grew when he reached her. She nodded at something that he said. Then the two of them took off, floating through the crowd that flooded into the school.

As I sat and watched them, my thoughts were bouncing around in my head, like fireflies in a jar. Little tiny light bulb moments flashed around inside of my brain. If he thought we were only friends because we’d been pushed into it, what were the chances he’d ever think of me as anything more?

“The chances aren’t good at all,” I said miserably to my empty car.

I didn’t linger in the parking lot waiting for Daphne or Finola to find me. The moment Tristan and Julie disappeared through the school doors I hopped out of my car. I wrangled my book bag strap onto my shoulder as I slammed the door.

With one quick glance I found Xavier’s car parked in its usual spot. He wasn’t leaning up against it. My best guess was that he’d gone inside already. I decided to go straight to his locker instead of stopping at my own first. I knew that if I hesitated, or gave myself time to think things through, I might lose my nerve.

My new confidence wasn’t fueled by a sudden interest in Xavier. It was fueled by an intense desire to forget all about Tristan. Maybe Daphne and Finola were right. Maybe I just needed to move on. Maybe a distraction would help.

I doubted it.

But at that moment I was willing to do just anything to get Tristan out of my head.

Xavier was easy to spot. He towered over the rest of the crowd. His hair was the same chocolate cherry color that Daphne’s was. His complexion was just as perfect and his cheekbones just as deeply cut.

I pushed my way through the crowd.

“Xavier,” I said in what I hoped to be a low, flirty tone.

He turned to me. His eyes were the same color as his sister’s but Daphne had never looked at me the way he was looking at me now. He wore a cocky, knowing smile. As if he never doubted for a blasted second that I would come around. That smile was almost enough to make me turn around and forget about what I’d just started.

I caught sight of Tristan and I was fortified by my desperation once more.

“Sammy,” Xavier drawled, using the nickname that I’d only ever allowed Tristan to use. “What’s up?” He’d turned to the side, one shoulder rested against his locker. His gaze crept over me.  I felt it as though it were a physical thing. It was a foul feeling, like being tangled up in a cobweb.

I couldn’t do this. There had to be a better way. If I needed to forget about Tristan, I’d get a new hobby. My potion making skills were severely lacking. Maybe Finola would help. The girl was a genius with potions. That ought to take up some time and fill up my head. Right?

“
Sammy
…?” He drew out my name in a teasing tone. He still wore a smirk.

“It’s actually Samara. You can call me Sam. Just…don’t call me Sammy,” I rambled. “I was wondering if you’ve seen Daphne? She’s not here yet.”

His smile faltered. “Really? That’s why you stopped at my locker?”

I scoffed. “Really. Why else would I stop here?”

He shrugged and his smile slipped away completely. He pushed off from the locker so he was standing up straight, towering over me again. “I think she mentioned she and Fin were going to stop at The Rush for smoothies or a cappuccino or something.”

“Thanks,” I said as I gave his shoulder a smack. I started backing away. “I guess they’ll be here soon then. See you later!”

I spun on my heel and hurried away.

I swerved my way through the crowd until I reached my own locker. I realized my palms were sweating and my heart was hammering. The realization of what I’d almost done smacked into me like a falling brick.

Had I really almost asked
Xavier
to go on a date? Was I out of my mind?

I leaned forward, banging my head on my locker door. I did it again for good measure. Maybe that would knock some good sense loose.

“Sammy?”

My head snapped up and I spun around.

“Hey, Tristan.” I slumped back against my locker. My knees felt weak. I decided it was probably the weight of my insanity pressing down on me.

“What’re you doing?” he asked.

“Waiting for Daph and Fin.”

“No. I mean with…,” he motioned toward my locker, “and your head. And…forget it.”

I was relieved he was dropping the topic. I didn’t want to give him the chance to change his mind. “What’s up?”

He glanced around and though the hallway was plenty busy, he must’ve decided he didn’t care if anyone overheard.

“I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry. About this morning. I should’ve just accepted your apology and let everything else go.” He reached out his hand and squeezed my shoulder. “I’m glad you’re my friend. I hope that what I said didn’t hurt your feelings. That was never my intention. I didn’t mean that I wouldn’t still want to be friends with you if we’d met another way. I just meant that I didn’t think
you’d
give
me
the time of day if we didn’t know each other from outside of school.”

I understood what he was saying. I winced because I’d never thought about it before, but he was probably right. Under other circumstances, I probably wouldn’t have sought out his friendship. But that didn’t matter.

“That’s all irrelevant,” I said. “Because we are friends. You’re one of my best friends. And I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

His hand slipped away and he smiled at me. “Thanks. I feel the same.”

Neither of us said anything for a few moments. The sound of students chattering and rushing around filled the air, pressing away the silence.

I felt like our friendship was back on track again. The rocky start to the morning felt as though it had evened out.

“Thanks for telling me that. I feel better,” I admitted.

“Yeah, no problem. That’s not the only reason I stopped to talk to you though. I also needed to let you know I don’t need a ride tonight.”

My heart dropped, landing in my stomach with a thud. “Oh. Okay. Riding with Julie again?”

He nodded.

“Well that’s just…Good for you,” I said, trying to put some cheer into my voice. “It’s great. Have fun!”

He narrowed his eyes at me.

I realized I was probably acting jealous again. Ugh. I didn’t mean to. I just couldn’t seem to help myself. I’d seen the way that Julie had smiled at him. He’d said that she only wanted help studying but I didn’t believe that. Now they were getting together two nights in a row? That was just…great.

“We talked about this,” Tristan said. He sounded irritated with me again.

I must’ve looked less than happy to hear he was spending more time with Julie.

“Sammy!” Xavier said as he wedged himself between Tristan and me.

“
Samara
,” Tristan and I both corrected at the same time.

Xavier shot an annoyed look over his shoulder at Tristan before turning back to me. “You ran off so fast. I wasn’t done talking to you yet.”

I glanced at Tristan, assuming he’d walk away now that our conversation was apparently over. For the first time maybe ever, I wanted him to go. I did not want him to stick around, questioning me on my attitude.

I leaned back, clunking my head on my locker again. My friends were right. I really needed to do something about this situation.

“Go with me to Derek’s party on Friday night,” Xavier said. It wasn’t really a question or an invitation. It sounded more like a demand.

I glanced at Tristan. He looked like he was about to burst out laughing. Did he think it was funny that Xavier had actually taken the time to notice me?

“Why don’t you go harass some other girl?” Tristan asked.

Xavier turned around to look at him. “Are you talking to me?”

“Guess so,” Tristan said with a shrug.

Xavier turned back to me. “Am I harassing you?”

“I—”

Tristan cut me off, aiming his words at Xavier. “You’re not interested in a girl like Samara. So why don’t you just move along?”

A girl like me? What was that supposed to mean?

“I’ll go,” I said. “With you. To the party.”

Xavier turned to Tristan and grinned. Then he turned back to me. “We’ll work out the details later.”

“Later,” I muttered as he sauntered off.

“You cannot be serious,” Tristan said, his voice low. “You’re actually going to go out with
him
? Why?”

I shrugged, already regretting my rash decision. “
Why
not?”

He threw his hands up in the air. “Whatever.”

Before I could say anything else, he stalked away.

~*~*~

I swirled around the big pile of white fluff that floated on top of my hot chocolate. I watched as it disintegrated. The colored sprinkles sank to the bottom as their life raft melted beneath them.

“Don’t look so glum,” Finola said as she gave me a nudge. “This could all work out for the best. I thought maybe if you went out with Xavier, he’d take your mind off Tristan. I never thought about how it would make Tristan feel. The way he went stomping away this morning? He was jealous.”

Finola sounded so sure. I shook my head. “I don’t think he was jealous. I think he was just mad. He thinks I’m stupid for saying ‘yes’.”

She shrugged and then diplomatically said, “Fine. Maybe it’s a bit of both. But he was definitely jealous. And that’s a good thing, right?”

“Maybe,” I said as I lifted my mug to my mouth.

I hadn’t said yes to Xavier to try to make Tristan jealous. I’d said yes because I was mad and I was hurt. That wasn’t any better. I was mad that he was spending another afternoon with Julie. I was hurt because he seemed to think it was funny that Xavier had asked me out.

So I’d said yes for a childish reason. Now I was regretting it.

“I think I’m going to tell Xavier I changed my mind,” I said.

Finola shook her head and groaned. “Don’t do that. I think it’s good for Tristan to see that other guys think of you…,” she paused trying to choose her words, “in
that way
,” she said primly.

“It just kind of feels dishonest,” I argued.

Finola flicked her head toward the window. “Daphne’s here.”

I glanced at the clock hanging over the door. “It’s about time.” She was nearly fifteen minutes late. While that was to be expected, it was still maddening because meeting at The Rush after school had been her idea.

The bell over the door jingled as she made her way in. We were in a booth at the back of the coffee house. It was our usual spot and she saw us right away. A huge smile broke out on her face as she hurried over.

She dropped down on the bench next to me.

“What’s so important that we had to meet here?” I asked.

She quickly tapped the palms of her hands on the table. It was a habit she had when she was excited about something. Her eyes darted around the small establishment. It wasn’t too crowded today. She turned back to us again, a conspiratorial smile on her face.

“What?” Finola asked suspiciously.

“Levi.”

It was a single word but she’d probably said enough.

“No,” I said right back to her.

“Tell me everything you know about him,” she demanded. She wiggled around in the seat, folded her hands in her lap and smiled at me expectantly.

Finola groaned theatrically.

“I don’t know anything, really,” I said. “He comes down for breakfast after I leave for the day. Mom has mentioned he leaves shortly after that. He’s gone when I get home. He comes back late in the evening. That’s all I know. I swear.” Though I hadn’t told her much, I still felt as though I should’ve told her nothing. He was a guest and we didn’t gossip about our guests.

Her expectant smile melted into a disappointed frown.

“Didn’t you interrogate him last night when he drove you to town?” Finola asked with a wink.

“All I found out was that he’s twenty-three. He’s from Goodhope. He’s an only child.” She shrugged. “Mostly he just asked questions about me. I barely got a word in. It was kind of flattering,” she said with a perplexed look on her face. Her eyes lit up and she smacked the table again, causing me to flinch. “Oh! I did find out what he’s researching!”

I perked up at that bit of news. “Go on.”

“He doesn’t believe that the Striga are dying out. He thinks they’re just blending in,” she said with a wicked gleam in her eye.

“How does that relate to his research?”

“He’s been interviewing some of the elderly people in town. He’s been asking them if they followed The House of Negrescu before it fell,” she said.

I frowned at that. “Does he expect people to answer honestly? I can’t imagine anyone wanting to own up to that. Especially if they’re all supposed to be laying low.”

“That’s the interesting part. No one is owning up to it
themselves
. But,” she said dramatically, “he’s had a few people who have been willing to talk. They’ve told him of other families who were followers of the Jaeger bloodline.”

My eyes darted around The Rush, as if I’d suddenly be able to see them among us. I realized I was being ridiculous.

“Like who?” Finola asked. Her voice was low as she leaned across the table toward Daphne.

“Not Alex’s family,” Daphne said as she poked Finola’s nose. “I don’t think, anyway. He wouldn’t give me names but out of curiosity, I asked about Alex. I knew you’d want to know.”