Mastered: Ten Tales of Sensual Surrender (41 page)

Noah gave Ty everything…but Ty still wanted more.

More was waiting for him now, sweet and warm and finally, finally aware of who she was.

Submissive.

His.

But could she be more than his, the way, deep down, he was more than Noah’s?

God. He didn’t want to crack this issue open, but the revelation that Tasha had finally discovered her sexual nature had been like a lightning strike. Noah knew Ty was a switch, and had introduced both male and female bottoms into their relationship. But those passing diversions weren’t enough. They weren’t Tasha, and they didn’t speak to his dominant urges the way she did. Tasha had been the one woman he’d wanted but never pursued, not wanting to influence something she needed to discover for herself.

Well, she’d discovered it, and now…

Yeah, what now?

He still didn’t have a damn clue when he let himself into the house he and Noah had shared for the last five years. Noah’s house, and getting past that reality had taken Ty some time. He was Noah’s submissive in bed, but he was still a man with more pride than he could afford to carry around most days. Some inequalities still stung, but they were results of Ty’s choices, not anything Noah denied him.

Hell, Noah never denied him anything. Went out of his way to provide for Ty’s needs and desires, even when Ty didn’t know he needed or wanted.

Even when Noah knew Ty’s desire could change everything between them.

As he closed the front door, listening for sounds of Noah or Tasha moving around in the dark house, Noah’s beloved face flashed in Ty’s memory. It was only a week ago that he’d revealed Tasha’s return to the East Coast, and the invitation he’d extended to her, which he’d presented to Noah as doing a favor for a friend. Not exactly a lie, but Ty still felt the occasional pang of guilt over withholding the full truth of his reasons.

Worse than the guilt was the knowledge Noah saw through the half-truth but hadn’t objected to Ty’s undeclared intentions. Noah hadn’t said anything at all about the issue.

The silence was eating Ty alive.

He dropped his keys on a marble-topped table near the door and closed his eyes, trying to capture some of the emotional stillness that always came over him as he lined up the perfect shot with his camera. The quiet of the house should have helped Ty center himself but calm eluded him. Noah and Tasha pulled him in different directions.

Was he man enough to draw both of them back to him, and toward each other at the same time?

A noise drew Ty to the kitchen, where the door to the basement stood half open. Noah had converted the finished basement into a workshop even before asking Ty to move in with him. The scent of leather and oil drifted up the stairs, scents Ty would always associate with Noah--inside the bedroom and out.

While he stood there, trying to decide which path to take--down to Noah, or off in search of Tasha--a shadow angled across the bottom of the narrow stairs. The shadow hesitated before continuing on, and Ty knew his presence had been noted.

Blowing out a breath, he started down the stairs. As much as he burned to see Tasha again, he owed his relationship with Noah some extra care and consideration.

Their connection was deeper than two guys fucking.

Ty knew that Noah was agitated just by the way he moved in the workshop downstairs. The late hour was just more proof of the disorder of their household. Noah was a regular sleeper, his center solid, his routine consistent. When he was upset or angry, he broke that routine, sometimes foregoing sleep until he was too exhausted to stay awake.

The source of this disruption to Noah’s routine was no mystery, and it was past time Ty owned up to what he’d done. Rolling his shoulders, Ty went downstairs. At the first creak of the steps, all activity in the workshop ceased, as if Noah had frozen.

The workshop was in an unusual state of disarray, with tools scattered instead of neatly hung. Bits of leather and wood littered the floor. Noah was bent over the work bench, his features illuminated by an architect lamp. He was working on an elaborate collar, the scroll work delicate and beautiful. The supple leather band reminded Ty that Noah had never collared him, never even offered it. When they attended lifestyle events, Noah always used a temporary collar. Ty had never questioned it until now. Why hadn’t Noah claimed him in front of their friends?

The time was all wrong but Ty couldn’t contain the question. “Why haven’t you collared me, Noah?”

The silence seemed to last an eternity and when Noah finally answered, he didn’t turn. “Would you have agreed, Ty?”

Shit. Would he have said “yes”? Ty wanted to believe that he would have been ecstatic to receive a promise of commitment from his Dominant. But the truth was more complicated. His relationship with Noah had drifted, mutual pleasure easily attained, even a solid friendship that Ty could rely upon, but the issue wasn’t black and white. Ty didn’t want to be only a submissive. Noah had known it and never demanded that Ty turn away from his dominant aspects.

“We could have agreed to bring in a female submissive--” Ty stopped. No. And Noah cut through the bullshit like he always did.

“Not any woman.” Noah finally turned to face Ty. Even in this tense conflict, Noah drew him. Ty couldn’t look away from his heated gray eyes. Noah’s ability to reach inside Ty’s soul and see more than anyone else made him dangerous. And as necessary as breathing.

Ty didn’t bother asking how Noah had figured out the depths of his connection to Tasha, but he didn’t want Noah to think the sessions they’d enjoyed with a third had been meaningless.

The truth was, he’d learned a lot from those experiences. He’d enjoyed them, too, and as much as he needed the control Noah took--the release he gave--Ty also needed something in which they were equal.

Someone they could love and care for together.

Ty realized Noah was still staring at him, waiting for a response. He took a step closer, needing Noah to believe him when he said, “It was never about the woman.”

Noah stared at him. “You know what happens when you lie to me.”

Ty’s cock jumped at the sensual threat. Tempting to turn this around and give Noah an outlet, but that would be more of a lie than his omission. This, he had to face head on. “It wasn’t about the woman. That’s the truth.”

“Not all of it. That woman upstairs? I know about her. I always have. You’ve hidden her from me, thinking I couldn’t see her in you. But I know you, Ty. Every time you rejected the idea of a permanent submissive in our lives, every time you kept your distance from the bottoms we shared, you told me all about Tasha.” Noah’s forceful words slapped Ty across the face.

An iron band locked around Ty’s lungs and squeezed, blacking his vision. Was Noah going to kick him out? It had always been one of Ty’s fears that Noah would become dissatisfied and end their relationship.

Noah threw a handful of grommet covers onto the workbench. The metal rings bounced and rolled as he shoved away from the table and stalked toward Ty. “You never said anything about her, but she was always here between us. And now she’s here. Between us. Does that answer your question? I never asked you for a commitment because I didn’t think you could give it to me.”

“Have I disappointed you? Haven’t you gotten what you wanted from me? A perfect little trophy to parade around? A Dominant only you had the power to master?” Ty knew he was being an asshole, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself.

“Yeah, I show you off,” Noah growled, opening and closing his fists. “You’re mine.”

Without warning, Noah grabbed Ty’s shoulder and pushed him against the wall. The rough, demanding kiss that followed made Ty groan. He met Noah with equal force, infusing the kiss with all his anger and need.

Somehow Noah got Ty’s hands above his head. He pinned Ty from wrist to thigh, even dropping one hand to encircle Ty’s throat with his fingers. Somewhere in the hungry, angry taking and giving, the kiss changed.

Ty wasn’t sure which of them surrendered to the tenderness, the aching love that often passed between them during the dark, silent nights in their bedroom when they came together, but there was no space between them now. Ty ground his cock against Noah’s, a desperate demand that made Noah groan against his mouth.

Noah broke the kiss, but pressed his forehead to Ty’s. For a moment, neither of them spoke. Ty’s fingers were buried in Noah’s shirt front and he didn’t want to let go. That was the crux of it. No matter how he felt about Tasha, he wanted to stay with Noah. He wanted them both. What the hell was he going to do?

“I kissed her,” Noah said.

Despite the arousing picture that presented, suspicion bled across Ty’s tongue. “Why?”

Noah shoved away from him. “For the same reason I kissed you the first time.”

Bracing his hand against the wall, Ty closed his eyes and hung his head. “You wanted me.”

“I still do.”

“So what now?”

After a beat of silence, in which Ty thought Noah was going to walk away and leave the question unanswered, Noah said, “Look at me when you’re talking to me.”

Ty’s body heated at the command, responding to so much more than the words. Eye contact during discussions was one of Noah’s unbreakable rules. Ty hated that fucking rule--wanted the privacy he gained by hiding his eyes, and the ignorance of not seeing Noah’s expressions--but he lifted his head and turned around, anyway, because the rule came from a place of love and respect.

And if Noah was enacting the rule, that meant Noah still viewed their relationship in a committed light.

Ty’s gut clenched as he studied his lover and Master’s body language. Noah wore a black undershirt and khaki cargo pants. His arms and feet were bare even though the basement wasn’t hooked up to the heating system that kept the rest of the house at a comfortable temperature, and only a ceramic space heater kept the sub-level from being cold enough for Ty to see his breath. Noah’s thick, defined biceps flexed as he crossed his arms over his chest and braced his feet, a stance that had the power to put Ty on his knees. He wanted to go there in that moment, right down on the floor between Noah’s feet and beg for forgiveness, but the hard line of Noah’s lips kept Ty upright.

The only fix for this problem between them was words. Sucking a deep breath, Ty let out the thing he’d been holding back. “I want both of you. Together, in the same relationship. I want her to need you as much as I do. I want her to love you as much as I do.”

Noah’s throat worked as he processed that, and when he spoke, his voice was raw, like he was stuffing down some emotion that threatened to burst free in a scream. “You didn’t tell me that. Worse, you didn’t tell her.”

Ty exhaled in a rush. “That isn’t something you say over e-mail.”

“But it is something you say. Not something you hide.”

“I didn’t know how to do it. I didn’t know what I was going to do about anything, if I was going to jump at all, but then she got that job offer and told me she was coming back to Baltimore. I thought this would be my chance. I thought if you saw her.Christ, Noah, you’ve seen her. You can see what she is. I bet you got your hands in her hair and your tongue in her mouth and she bent like a willow for you, soft and hot and fucking ready--” His heart lodged in his throat and he had to force the words out, had to know if he was wrong. “I thought she was…is she ready?”

Noah’s features hardened and he lowered his arms to his sides. “She wants to submit to you. If you don’t know the answer to that question, you have no business taking this any further.”

Ty nodded. He got what Noah was saying, but even though he believed the time was right--maybe even now or never, before Tasha looked elsewhere for someone to fulfill her--a kernel of doubt pinged around in his gut.

“What if I’m the one who isn’t ready?” All the years he’d played at power exchange, topping casually but never in a committed relationship, meant nothing when it came to what he wanted to do and be with Tasha.

“You’ll learn.” Noah turned back to the workbench. He started picking up the metal rings he’d scattered, leaving Ty to make his decisions.

“Will you help me?”

“Will I help you become what somebody else needs?” He abandoned the grommets and planted his hands on the bench, his shoulders tense, the tendons in his neck taut. He tilted his head, sightless gaze fixed on a blank stretch of wall. His lips moved silently, and in the stillness, Ty could hear the hitch in Noah’s breath.

Invisible claws ripped Ty’s chest wide. He reached for Noah, started to take the question back, but at the last minute, he dropped his hand.

The small movement set something loose in Noah, who inhaled and blew out the breath without looking away from that wall. “I will always be what you need.”

Noah’s words rang with a finality that made Ty want to get down on his knees right there and beg for that collar so he could bind Noah to him no matter what happened with Tasha. The pressure gathering in his skull burst in a tide of emotion that weakened his legs and trapped his voice in his throat.

Needing to acknowledge Noah’s vow, Ty forced his way past the block and rasped, “I know you will.”

Noah closed his eyes for a count of three, and then resumed collecting the grommets. After the scrape of metal on marble normalized the atmosphere between them, Ty ran his hand through his hair and admitted his uncertainty to Noah. “I don’t want to blow it. She’s new to the scene and she’s fragile. Hell, I don’t even know if she’ll be open to a threesome. I’ve dominated women before, but it never meant this much.”

Realizing how that must sound, Ty reached out and gripped Noah’s arm, a silent plea for him to understand.

But the silence was back. It could be like that. The unspoken words could be more painful than the shouts when they fought. Noah’s temper was formidable and it had taken him years to master it through learning control. Ty recognized the regular breathing, the way his neck muscles clenched, the twitch of his fingers. The signs that Noah was tamped down, holding himself back.

“Talk to me.” Ty tightened his grip. “You’re my Master. You will always be my Master, no matter what happens with Tasha-”