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Authors: M.J. Trow

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BOOK: Maxwell's Revenge
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Soon, either too soon or not soon enough depending on the point of view, they were slowing and stopping under the canopy of the A&E at Leighford General. Jacquie and Maxwell, showing a turn of speed that Hall could not have expected, were out of the car and in through the double doors before he even had the handbrake on. Other mortals would then
have gone off to park. Henry Hall just left the car where it was, flashing his badge at the rapidly approaching jobsworth porter, stopping him in his tracks. Just one of the little perks of office he secretly enjoyed.

He found Maxwell and Jacquie talking earnestly to a woman in the waiting area. Even here, the indefinable smell of a Third World hospital hit his nostrils. Any day now they’d empty the vending machines of anything vaguely tasty and bad for you, and the picture of abject misery would be complete. The woman was wringing her hands and Hall didn’t need to be told who she was. He was seeing into the future of Jacquie’s face if, in the intervening years, someone took his sergeant’s face and gave it a hard squeeze. Add a jaundiced view of life, mix in a little venom and misery and you ended up with Jacquie’s mother.

‘Guv, Henry, this is my mother,’ Jacquie was saying. The niceties, he thought, wryly, even at a time like this. Ever the professional. He caught Maxwell’s eye and took the woman by the elbow.

‘Mrs Carpenter,’ he said. ‘Let’s just sit over here for a moment and let Max and Jacquie see how Nolan is. You’ve had a shock. Have you got a cup of tea?’

The woman shook her head miserably.

‘Would you like one?’

She made a gesture as if to push him away. ‘No! I’ve got a flask. I’m not to have anything outside. I’m not to let Nolan …’ and she subsided in floods of tears.

He patted her shoulder, in a patently foreign gesture. ‘There, there,’ he said, as if surprised at himself. ‘Let’s get you a drink of water.’

She looked up and was about to speak.

‘From the tap. I’ll let it run for a while. Don’t worry.’ He went off to get it and she slumped over, her hands between her knees in total despair.

A nurse in pale blue came scurrying out from behind a pair of double doors beyond the waiting room.

‘Mr and Mrs Carpenter?’ she asked.

‘More or less,’ Maxwell said.

‘Would you like to come this way? Nolan wants his mummy.’ She caught the look on Maxwell’s face. ‘Oh, and his daddy, of course,’ she smiled. She held out an arm and ushered them through. ‘Come on. This way.’

They were taken into a curtained-off cubicle, where their little one sat on what looked like an acre of trolley, a waffle-woven blanket over his chubby knees. His curls were clinging damply to his forehead and his eyes were wide in a white face. He held out his arms to parents in general and they flew into them, kneeling on the chairs helpfully placed on either side. When they let him
go enough for him to speak, he said, ‘Mummy. Dadda. Nolan has be sick.’ He pulled a sad face.

Jacquie brushed the hair back from his forehead and kissed it gently. ‘You are such a brave boy,’ she said, wetting him with her tears. ‘Do you feel better now?’

He beckoned her closer and whispered in her ear, ‘Want to poo.’

‘Oh, sweetie,’ she said and gave him a hug. She turned to the nurse. ‘He needs the loo,’ she said. ‘Where is it?’

The nurse smiled at her and shrugged her shoulders regretfully. ‘Well, it’s right here, I’m afraid. Because we have been told he may have been given something, we will have to save … samples … until we know what it was. Sorry. He has refused to use a bedpan, claiming, and quite rightly, to be a big boy now. But I’m sure you can explain.’

Maxwell had been standing mutely by the side of the trolley. He didn’t dare speak because he knew his voice would let him down. He had been in another world, the tunnel where past and present meet, since the phone call. Even now that he could see and feel his little boy, clearly hardly the worse for his adventure, he was still feeling as if he had been through the mill. But now, his teaching skills were called for and he bent down to his son.

‘Now, my little bloke,’ he said, ‘I know you
don’t want to poo in here, because you are a bit big for that. But, you know how it is, NHS cutbacks and whatnot, this hospital doesn’t have any toilets!’ He clicked his tongue and raised his eyebrow. ‘Now, what do you think about that?’

‘Hum!’ Nolan said, and clicked his tongue in reply. ‘Is it the guv’ment, Dadda?’

‘Too right, old mate,’ said Maxwell. ‘So, could you stretch a point and use the potty thing, just this once?’

The little boy gave a theatrical sigh. ‘O-kaaay,’ he said and looked up at the nurse. ‘But you go. I want my Mummy.’

‘Fair enough,’ the woman said, utterly unaware that Charles II used to go, loudly and lavishly, in front of a dozen or so courtiers, and went out through the curtain, followed by Maxwell. She turned to him. ‘What a lovely child,’ she said. ‘Very bright.’

‘Just as well, or we would have thrown him back,’ Maxwell said with just a touch of his usual self. He saw her expression. ‘Just joking,’ he added, hurriedly. ‘We would have been quite happy with anything; we’re just extra pleased with what we have.’

She nodded and hurried off to get the baby bedpan, feeling grateful that she hadn’t made any gaffes along the lines of calling him Granddad.

He poked his head back round the curtain. ‘I’ll go and talk to the others,’ he said to
Jacquie. ‘Give me a call when you want me.’

‘Yes,’ said Jacquie, not turning round. She didn’t want to take her eyes off the boy in case, like the cat i’ the adage, he turned into the other possibility. ‘See you in a minute.’

Maxwell smiled and ducked back out into the corridor. He went out into the waiting area and saw the unlikely sight of Henry Hall sitting with his mother-in-law-to-be, murmuring what were almost certainly platitudes, but kindly ones. As he approached, he could tell that his first impression was right.

‘… very strong at that age,’ Henry was saying. ‘I remember when mine were small, they were always eating things and they’ve all grown up well and strong.’ He looked up gratefully as Maxwell came up to them and took a seat on the other side of the dejected woman. ‘How is he?’ he asked and leant back, as if handing over the reins.

‘He’s been sick,’ he said. ‘He is now, rather reluctantly, using a bedpan. He refused to go before Jacquie arrived, because he doesn’t use potties any more, now he is a big boy.’ He stopped for a moment and ducked his head. His boy was even rather lovely when pooing and how many people were there in the world of whom you could say
that
? ‘The nurse said they are having to save everything, because of his having been giving something potentially harmful.’

Betty indulged herself in another round of crying, which had strangely not increased the general boot-ness of her face, but it was now a wet, scarlet boot.

‘Now, now,’ Hall said, by now almost on automatic. He leant down and spoke to her as if she was a rather dim child. ‘Will you be all right here if we go over there a minute and have a talk?’

She snuffled in reply and Hall decided to take that as a yes.

He and Maxwell got up slowly and moved away, glancing back at her from time to time. They moved with that sideways, bent-over shuffle peculiar to people uncertain as to whether they should be standing up at all. Eventually, with a final look over their shoulders, they straightened up and moved off into the corner by the fish tank, obligatory furnishing feature of casualty departments the world over, complete with one strange black fish suckered to the glass and a moth-eaten guppy.

‘She’s taken it badly,’ Hall remarked.

Maxwell took a deep breath. ‘Empathy is my middle name, Henry. I sometimes wonder what my parents could have been thinking.’ Hall looked up, glad to hear the old Maxwell back. This was the best proof that the little lad was not too poorly. ‘But even I am having trouble feeling sorry for her, being Jacquie’s mother notwithstanding. She had one simple task –
to take Nolan for a walk and not let him eat anything. All right, I suppose that is two simple tasks; but they are
very
simple, I think you’ll agree. She managed the walk, which was pretty much optional as to how it was achieved. But she didn’t manage the other part, not even slightly. In another time, I’d have hacked her to pieces, à la the hound Gelert. As it is, I still may sue.’

Hall waited while the other man vented his spleen, using his policeman’s nose to tell when to butt in. ‘I agree, Max, but even so …’

‘I’m still venting, Henry,’ Maxwell said crisply. ‘Wait your turn. She’s only here to
so-called
help with Nolan and in less than half an hour she proved she couldn’t look after the cat. In fact, I won’t
let
her look after the cat and he is getting on for the most self-sufficient cat I know. I expect she was wandering along, gassing with some hearty walking type and not even looking down to see what Nole was up to—’

‘I will have to interrupt you, Max, and I’m sorry. You’ve clearly had a horrible shock and what with … well, what happened before, it is hitting you hard.’ Henry Hall knew about Maxwell’s first family and felt for him as everyone who has been lucky enough to love and not lose must. ‘But I don’t think you can blame Betty entirely. For a start, Nolan is by way of being pretty much his own man and I applaud you both for that. The only thing that makes him
different from the two of you in your treatment of him is that he is smaller. So he doesn’t take kindly to being given orders. Betty, on the other hand, seems to be an ordering sort of woman, if I may presume to make a judgement, having only seen her crying and weeping.’

‘Yes,’ Maxwell conceded. ‘That’s a very fair summation, Henry. You’re obviously not a Detective Chief Inspector for nothing. However, I miss your thrust on this one.’

‘All I’m saying is, don’t be too hard on her. I expect she told Nolan not to take anything from anyone. He’s used to being asked to consider not taking anything from anyone for reasons a, b and c. Do you see what I’m getting at?’

Maxwell looked thoughtful. ‘Yes, Henry. I do. You’re right. Too much democracy. Logic. Tears before bedtime.’ Then the frightened father took over again, ‘But, for God’s sake, Henry! Even so …’

Hall put a heavy hand on Maxwell’s shoulder. ‘I’m going to have to question him, Max.’

‘Who? Nole? But he’s just a baby, Henry! There must be laws covering this sort of thing. Ask Betty.’

‘And she will be … how much help, on a scale of one to ten? I’d rather go with the kid.’

Maxwell considered. ‘All right. Ask Nolan. But only when we get him home. And only with us there.’

‘And I will leave my handcuffs at the nick. Look, he knows me. I think he quite likes me.’ The DCI almost chuckled. ‘He tries to take my glasses off.’

No wonder, thought Maxwell. Like the rest of us, he wonders if you’ve got eyes behind there.

‘Nothing he says will stand up, so don’t worry about video links to court or anything else. I just think that we might get the only partial description from him that we have at the moment. Sylvia’s old running man is a start, but hardly comprehensive. Betty says they were all dressed for walking in shorts and things. All ages, both sexes. In other words, a perfect cross section of the population. So if Nolan noticed anything, anything at all, like a funny nose or a missing tooth, the sort of thing you might expect from the son of a policewoman and a raving lunatic, then it will help.’ Payback time.

Maxwell was shocked. Henry Hall had almost been amusing. It was nearly as scary as the rest of the afternoon’s experiences put together. He made a decision and hoped Jacquie would agree. ‘Yes, Henry. That will be fine. Come over this evening, when we have him back home.’

Hall looked over his shoulder. ‘I think you’ll have him home before then. Look behind you.’

Jacquie had come through the double doors with a smiling Nolan in her arms. He was a little pale, but smiling broadly. He gave a laconic
wave to his father. ‘Hi, Dadda.’ He looked across at his grandmother, who had jumped to her feet but not gone forward to meet her daughter and grandson. Jacquie gave a lightning glance at Maxwell and then went straight to her mother.

‘Can you just hold Nole for a minute, Mum,’ she said and handed the rather reluctant toddler into her arms. It was the most difficult thing she had ever done, and possibly the best. Maxwell and Hall went to join them, united in silent admiration for their favourite woman policeman.

She turned to Maxwell with a smile to light up his life. ‘His poo was quite normal,’ she said happily, adding automatically, ‘sorry, guv. The doctor thinks he perhaps just ate a fly or something. I’m not so sure. He was given a lolly by a man, he says. I told him he shouldn’t have taken it, but he says the man had been talking to Ninja, so that he thought it would be all right.’

‘Ninja?’ Hall was confused.

‘Betty,’ said Maxwell in an aside. ‘If I thought I could begin to explain, I would.’

Jacquie touched Hall’s sleeve. ‘We’ll need a lift home, I’m afraid, guv. Is that OK?’

‘Of course,’ he said, his eyes still on Nolan. ‘Look, Jacquie, is it all right if I come in with you when we get back to your house and just … well, ask Nolan a few questions?’

‘What?’ Jacquie looked fit to bite him.

‘I think he should, darling,’ said Maxwell,
cringing inside as he spoke. He knew what her reaction would be and here it came now.

‘What?’ she said again. ‘Max, are you insane? He’s just a baby.’

‘Granted,’ Maxwell said. ‘Well, I think he would prefer the word “boy”. But, yes, he is young for this, but he knows Henry. He tries to take his glasses,’ he said, he hoped winningly. ‘He may be the only witness.’

‘There’s my mother,’ she said, truculently.

There was a silence.

She gave in all at once. ‘Yes, Henry,’ she said, wearily. ‘You can come in. But only for a short while. I think we all need a quiet evening, just the three of us …’

‘Four,’ said Maxwell, with a sigh.

‘Oh, yes, four of us, to get over this.’

‘Understood,’ said Hall, briskly. ‘We’ll get someone from the nick to bring your car home. That will save you a journey in tomorrow.’

BOOK: Maxwell's Revenge
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