Maya And The Tough Guy (2 page)

“You get the bed,” Damon said. “I’ll sleep out here.”

“Oh, no, I couldn’t. You don’t have to do that for me.”

He shot her a wicked, half-grin. “‘Course I do. I’m a gentleman.”

She blushed and shuffled her feet. “In that case, thanks.”

She made her way into his bedroom. It was cluttered. She got a sinking feeling when she saw two, crumpled beer cans—her dad’s brand—on the nightstand sitting next to an ashtray and lighter. She grabbed the cans and slipped them under the bed; the better to pretend they weren’t there. Then she crawled under the covers and turned off the lamp. She tucked Jayce’s number beneath her pillow.

Sleep evaded her. Every time she thought she might doze, she snapped back awake, fear clutching at her chest. At last, she wept. Only the sounds of her sniffles disturbed the night, but her face was screwed up tight in an effort to remain quiet.
 

Damon must have heard her. He came in, a silhouette in the doorway. “You all right, Maya?” he asked.

She opened her mouth to answer, but a sob escaped. He came toward her and sat on the edge of the bed. He stroked her hair and thumbed away the tears. “Shhh. You’re safe tonight. Everything’s gonna be okay.”

Gradually she calmed as his fingers gently touched her face and hair.

And then his movements changed. She couldn’t see his face in the dark, but she could feel the intent in his hands. He cupped the back of her head and his breath was warm on her face before he kissed her.
 

She trembled, suddenly aware that she was in a new kind of danger. He lowered his lips to hers and kissed her gently. Her body responded. She didn’t understand the sensations, but he seemed to. His touch heightened everything. Her mind screamed at her to make him stop, but her body was weary and aroused.
 

He pushed the blanket off of her and dragged his fingertips up her legs and to the hem of her t-shirt. They hovered there for a moment as he continued kissing her lips. And then he slipped his hand beneath the shirt and between her legs. She gasped and felt him smile against her neck.
 

She could only inhale, her breath a rattling sound in the room.

He stroked her while he took her hand and pressed it to the front of his boxers. He guided her hand in the open front and wrapped her fingers around his length. She’d never felt a man like that before. She’d wondered, but never felt.

“You’re shaking,” he whispered. “Want me to stop?”

Yes
. “N-no,” she stammered.

He stood, removing his hand from her and hers from him. There was enough light that she could see his movements as he peeled off his t-shirt and shoved down his boxers. Then he pulled her upright and removed the t-shirt he’d loaned her. She thanked God for the darkness. She could stand having his hands on her, but his eyes—that would have been unbearable.

He lay on top of her and kissed her again, this time parting her thighs with his knee. “I…I don’t think I’m ready,” she whispered.

“Oh, you’re plenty ready. Trust me.

Panic raced through her. Earlier, with Jayce, she’d been frightened by his passion. He’d moved so fast and with so much intensity that she’d panicked and pushed him away. This moment with Damon was different. Something wasn’t right. She wasn’t supposed to be here.
 

“I can’t.” She tried to say it firmly, but it came out barely more than a whisper.

“Shh. It’s okay, Maya. I’m gonna take care of you, I swear. You don’t have to be afraid anymore. Not ever again.”

They were the right words at the right time. A voice, way, way back in her mind told her the words were a lie, but in that moment, she wanted to believe them so badly. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. He slid slowly inside of her. It only stung for a moment and then it felt…good. Wrong and right at the same time. Invasive, but intimate.
 

She clung to him, excited by his pants and moans, thrilled to be the source of his pleasure. When he pulsed inside of her, he whispered a curse in her ear, and she felt chills ripple through her body. She felt powerful and vulnerable all at once.

He collapsed on top of her, and she listened to a clock ticking and the crickets outside. When he rolled off of her, he brought her into his arms and kissed her tenderly. At last she fell asleep, feeling safe for the first time in her memory.

The next morning, while Damon was in the shower, she found Jayce’s phone number, crumpled on the floor. She used Damon’s lighter and burned it in the ashtray.

CHAPTER TWO

8 years later

Jayce reclined in his office chair with his head back and his vision blurring. The bar didn’t open for another half hour. He knew it was unethical to accept sexual favors from a woman he employed, but Janice was different. She never took sex seriously, and she was having it with several other guys. Ultimately, he had no willpower. Or, he just didn’t care enough to use his willpower. Plus, she had a tongue stud.

“Fuck, you’re good at this,” he groaned.

She giggled without stopping, her tongue stroking his erection.
 

The knock on his office door jolted them both upright; their eyes wide and round. And then the handle started to turn. Jayce frantically forced himself back in his jeans and fumbled with the zipper while Janice struggled to get her bra back on. Neither of them got very far by the time the door opened.

Fate, his eternal enemy, must have been at work. It had chosen the worst possible person to find him in such a position. Janice was on her knees, clutching her shirt to her chest, and Jayce was holding his pants closed when Maya walked in. Maya hardly ever talked to him. She hardly ever looked at him. She didn’t even remember the few moments they’d had together in school. Any other time he would have fallen to his knees and rejoiced to the heavens that she’d approached him. God only knew how much lower her opinion of him was about to go.

She looked like an angel, as always. She was bundled up in a coat with a scarf around her neck and a stocking cap over her feathery, light brown curls. Her mouth hung open. “Oh, God,” she gasped. “Jayce, I’m so sorry. I’ll come back later.”

“No, no,” he said, finally getting his pants fastened. “Come in. This is fine.”

“Really?”

Janice stood and kissed Jayce on the cheek before slipping quietly out of the room. Maya clutched her purse in both hands and stepped out of Janice’s way. Jayce sank back down in his chair and wished the earth would just swallow him whole. “What can I do for you, Maya?”

She edged around the chair in front of his desk and sat. Her eyes were wide and she was nibbling at her bottom lip. He’d seen the nervous gesture a million times. “Um, I don’t know if you remember back around Christmas we talked about me maybe working here?”

Shit. He remembered. As always, with her, he’d managed to say the wrong thing and upset her. He’d told her he didn’t want to hire her and he hadn’t lied about the reasoning. The last place he wanted to see Maya working was his bar. She was better than that.
 

“You’re looking for work?” he asked. “I think they need a new office manager over at the clinic—”

“I can’t type. I don’t know any of the computer programs. I don’t have a diploma. I can’t get a job as an office manager.”

Jayce sat forward. Even with the desk separating them, she still shrank back away from him. How did this timid, frightened, mouse of a woman expect to serve drinks in a bar full of rowdy men? On any given Friday night, Janice had to slap about two dozen hands to keep her ass from being grabbed. “Sounds like your best course of action is to work on that GED.”

“I will. But I have children to feed right now.”

“Zoey and Kellen—”

“They’re the best friends in the world. They’ve absolutely given and given and given to me.” Tears welled in her green eyes and her voice cracked. “But I need, for myself, to start earning a living. I’ll get the GED. But I need an income. Now.”

Jayce rubbed at his jaw. “The diner?”

“Not hiring.”

“I saw a sign at Dierbergs—”

“They hired someone else.”

He racked his brain, desperate to find her some place to work that didn’t involve subjecting her body to the lewd stares of his customers.

Her breath hitched. “Am I not…not attractive enough?”

“What? No, Maya. That’s got nothing to do with—”

“Because I know how your waitresses dress. I could dress that way, too. I mean, maybe I could stuff my bra or something.”

“No. Maya, just…no.”

“Do you want me to do what Janice was doing to you before I walked in? Is that what it’ll take for you to hire me?”

“Jesus Christ!” He was on his feet, pacing away from his desk, feeling like the lowest kind of scum. “Listen, Janice and I are friends, okay? I do not do that with the other girls. I don’t want that from you. I just…”

“Just what? You think I can’t handle the work?”

He’d made it to the wall. He dropped his forehead against it and closed his eyes. “I just want better for you, Maya. You deserve better.”

She was quiet. The rough brick of the back wall of his office dug into his forehead.

“It’s a nice bar, Jayce,” she said softly, her voice quivering. “Maybe not classy…but definitely not trashy. I wouldn’t mind—”

“Isn’t there anywhere else you haven’t tried yet?” He turned to face her. “Anywhere at all?”

She swallowed. Her skin went pale and her eyes suddenly lost their luster. “Yeah,” she said, “there’s one other place.”

Jayce blew out a breath and leaned his back against the wall. “Great. You try it out, and if you still have no luck, we’ll talk.” If nothing else, it would buy him a little time to find some other job options for her.

She stood, carrying herself like an injured, elderly woman. “Thank you. I’m sorry for bothering you.”

That made him want to punch a wall. He hated her apologizing to him and thanking him and simpering and cowering. After she left he stared after her, sick to his stomach with disgust. She’d never been bold and assertive, but back in high school she’d at least displayed a little life. Vibrancy. Enthusiasm. It was all gone, now. Beaten out of her.

Jayce shook himself, grabbed the cigarettes he’d been trying to quit off and on for the past few years, and stepped out the back exit. He leaned against the building and lit his cigarette. The cold, late-January wind pierced through his t-shirt and jeans. Jayce didn’t mind the cold. He always figured since his blood ran so hot most of the time, a little cold weather was good for him. His skin pebbled and his body shivered, but he continued to smoke, forcing himself to stand still and take the wind’s punishment.
 

He thought about Maya. He’d been doing that a lot, recently—thinking about Maya. With her soon-to-be ex-husband in prison for breaking his restraining order, Maya had moved in with her best friend, Zoey. Zoey was dating Jayce’s best friend, Kellen. Jayce would be calling Kellen right this minute if Kellen had been in town. Instead, he was in Japan photographing some festival or something, leaving Jayce to figure things out for himself.
 

He wanted to help Maya. She’d stepped into a frightening world, bravely walking away from an abusive relationship. If there was some way Jayce could take on all of her burdens, he would. Unfortunately, she didn’t know him…didn’t trust him. There was no way to help her that she would accept, unless he gave her a crappy job. No, she could do better. If she couldn’t land a better job on her own, he’d go out and find one for her.
 

Jayce ground his cigarette into the pavement with the toe of his boot. He went back inside to open his bar.

#

“And how are you doing?”
 

Maya blinked. She’d been daydreaming. Her kids were in the next room playing. She sat on a love seat in a small, sparsely decorated office. There was one bookshelf, a desk in the back, and an armchair across from the love seat with a coffee table in between. Maya hugged a warm mug of coffee to her chest as her family therapist strolled in and took the armchair. The door clicked shut behind her.

“I’m well,” she answered, “just worried for my children.”

“You’re consistent with the therapy. It’s obvious you’ve been working closely with them. Sophie is adapting beautifully. Mattie is doing better expressing his feelings. There’s still work to do, but you’re on the right track. You should be proud of yourself, Maya. Now I want to know how
you
are feeling.”

Dr. Stinson had a soothing voice. At thirty, she didn’t look much older than Maya, but, somehow, she managed to put off a motherly air.
 

“I feel…afraid. Lonely. Same as always.”

“The same? What about sad? The last time, you characterized your feelings as sad and lonely.”

Maya hugged herself. “I’m still sad, but more for my kids and what I’ve put them through. I don’t think I miss Damon so much anymore.”

“Afraid?”

“I’m—I’m starting a new job. I’ve never worked before.”

“New experiences can be scary. What’s the job?”

A clock on the wall behind Maya ticked steadily. She sat her coffee mug on the table. “Dancing.”

Dr. Stinson’s eyebrows went up. “Really? I’m assuming you mean exotic dancing?”

Maya nodded. She stared at her knees and swallowed down the bitter taste of shame.
 

“Is this something you want to do?” the doctor asked.

“It’s something I have to do. I have no job skills and no one else is hiring.”

“Nothing? Waitressing? Store clerk?”

“I’ve looked. I’ll keep looking. But I spoke to one of the girls who works at this place and she clears at least three hundred a night in tips on weekends.”

“Is that worth it?”

Maya looked up at her. “Don’t you think my children’s needs outweigh my personal dignity?”

“To a degree. What do you think?”

“I think I need to feed and clothe them. I need to quit mooching off my friends.”

Dr. Stinson studied her.

Maya looked down. “There’s a guy who owns a bar. He’d hire me out of pity, but it’s clear he doesn’t want to. I wouldn’t make as much. And since the bar opens at three, I’d never see my kids.”