Mercy for the Fallen (24 page)

Chapter Twenty-Three

I was right.  It was awful.  I wasn’t sure what hurt more – the idea that he’d moved on, or the idea that he’d moved on with
her
and found his happy ever after.  Not that I had anything against Luz, I liked her, but he’d never had anything more than lukewarm feelings for her.  How exactly had she stepped in and taken my place?  And to name his daughter Parker… that was
our
inside joke.  I didn’t find it the least bit funny now. 

“He’s married to Luz.”  I glanced down at the engagement ring on my finger, the ring he’d placed there barely a month ago, by my way of thinking.  How long had he waited before he’d given up on me entirely?  Shame flooded me in the next instant.  How could I feel angry and betrayed by a man who I’d abandoned?  Just because I hadn’t meant to didn’t change anything in his reality.  How could I begrudge him his chance at a happy family life?

But I did, dammit… In that instant all I wanted to do was march down to that house and pull her ass out by the hair for moving in on my man.  I wanted to make him love me again the way I loved him.  Maybe he still did?  Maybe he’d see me again and…

“Mercy, are you alright?” Daphne asked, covering my hand with hers. 

“No, not really,” I admitted, twisting the ring on my finger.  “I just… I guess I didn’t expect everything to change so much while I was gone.”  

“Well… it has been five years.  A lot of things have changed.”  Her other hand rested on the faint swell of her belly and I caught the familiar gesture.  I’d done it a thousand times or more when I’d been expecting Eve.

“You’re pregnant!” I sucked in a breath, careening around the kitchen island to give her a careful hug when her ecstatic face confirmed my guess.  “Daphne, this is fantastic!  Why didn’t you say something?”  Probably because I’d been too busy asking questions about my own life as usual.  Then I noticed the simple gold band around the significant finger.  “Pregnant and married too?  When did this happen?  You have to tell me all about him. Are you having a boy or a girl?”

“Why don’t you have a seat and I’ll make us a more substantial snack.  Sam will be home soon and we can all catch up the rest of the way together.”

I was about to take a seat again, but that last bit brought me up short.  “Wait… Sam?  My Sam?”

“He’s kinda mine now…”

I couldn’t process it, it was too much.  How in the hell could that have happened?  Weren’t they at all worried about the fallout from the man upstairs?  “You’re married to Sam?  The food can wait…”

“I know, it’s amazing, right?”  Daphne positively glowed with happiness.  “I couldn’t believe it when he showed up out of the blue, and we’ve never been apart since.  I mean, we’re apart sometimes, like now.  It’s not like we’re joined at the hip, but you know what I mean.”

“And now you’re having a baby.”  It was so amazingly wonderful, I couldn’t stand it.  I started to choke up with emotion, my eyes shining with happiness so full it spilled over into tears.  Maybe my own life was irretrievably screwed up, but somehow this made it better.  “I’m just so insanely glad this worked out for you.  Nobody deserves this chance at happiness more than you do.”

Daphne instantly teared up as well.  “And here I thought I was the one to cry at the drop of a hat now,” she laughed.  We clung to each other in a warm hug and I felt oddly cleansed, as though somehow, everything was going to be fine.  Maybe there
was
such a thing as happily ever after?

“Mercy!”

I hadn’t even heard Sam come in, but my astonishment was nothing compared to his.  He stood, mouth gaping open like a fish, shopping bags fallen to the floor, forgotten.   

“Sam!” I yelled back, grinning from ear to ear like a fool.  Neither Daphne or I wanted to let go of each other, so we opened our arms and waved him over for a three way hug, full of laughter and sniffles. 

“I’m so glad to see you.  Now I know what it means, sight for sore eyes,” he blinked through joyful tears.  I pulled back to get a better look at him.  The unruly mop was gone again, his blonde hair falling in tousled curls above the ears.  Had I ever compared him to the homeless?  Sam was far more put together now in a pair of tailored black pants and a deep blue sweater of the softest cashmere under a long topcoat, a warm scarf tied around his neck in an intricate knot.  But what captivated my attention was his aura – a beautiful turquoise with a swirl of pink at the center. 

“You’re human!” I gasped in shock.

“I am human,” he nodded, grinning like mad. 

“How…?”

The story came out in stops and starts.  One of them would finish the other’s sentence, or interrupt with something to add.  Sam’s special task, the one I’d put him on after his petition was received – that had been to leave behind the trappings of Grace, as he put it, and live out the rest of his life as a mortal man.  Adam had known about it, but never truly believed it possible.  He didn’t talk much about the trials he was put through, or how he’d actually
become
human, sort of glossing through that part.  Most of the story revolved around how he’d been almost afraid to approach Daphne almost a year ago, fearing she’d moved on, and how she’d never given up on loving him.   And when he’d shown up on her doorstep, a flesh and blood human… the rest was a fitting end to the fairytale. 

Everyone had moved on without me.  They were all happier without me, really.  Matty, Parker, Daphne, their lives had all improved in my absence.  It was a humbling thought, but I didn’t begrudge them any of their happiness. 

We ordered pizza and talked and talked and
talked
.  I don’t think I’d ever heard Sam talk so much, and with such joy.  They were obscenely happy together, filled with hope and excitement for the new life they’d created.  It was enough to make me tear up every time I slowed down enough to think about it.

Adam’s name hadn’t come up much, and I was fine with that.  Part of me was ticked at him for not passing along the slightest iota of information as to where I’d disappeared to.  Never mind the fact that I’d sworn him to secrecy about Eve’s actual location, he could have told them
something
instead of letting them think I’d abandoned them all for good.  At the end of the day though, I wasn’t sure it made much difference.  Whether I’d meant to or not, I
had
chosen Eve over them, and I probably would’ve done it again if given the chance. 

The time came when they ran out of steam and wanted to know what I’d been up to for the past five years, only I didn’t have all that much to tell.  Well, beyond sharing what happened to Eve and the basics about Lucifer’s shenanigans.  I was deliberately vague about where she was now, saying only that she was in Michael’s care, but Sam immediately knew what I meant.

“Ah, Ma’on,” Sam nodded in approval.  “That’s brilliant, of course.” 

“You can’t tell anyone where she is though, promise me.”  Not that I thought they’d go blabbing it, but I was serious about keeping it on the down low.

“Of course,” Daphne immediately agreed.  “I still don’t understand where that is or why it’s brilliant though.”

“It’s a heavenly realm where the Fallen may not enter,” Sam explained.  “That explains why you’ve been gone for so long.”

“What do you mean?” Daphne still didn’t get it. 

I took a deep breath, I’d put it off long enough, wanting to cling to the happy mood of the room before I returned to my own heartbreak.  “I left Texas with Michael less than a month ago.  In that time, five years have passed here on Earth, but not for us in Heaven.”

Her face crumpled in distress.  “Oh, Mercy… you mean to tell me it’s only been a month for you since you’ve been gone?”

“Yep.  Not all that long ago we were having Totally Awesome Tuesday and planning my wedding to Parker.”  My gaze fell to the ring on my finger again.

“And now he’s married to Luz…” she sighed, the pain of commiseration replacing her buoyant mood.  “I thought, we all thought… you chose to be holed up somewhere.  That you’d chosen Bunny’s safety over a life here with us.  We didn’t blame you for it, but… well, it hurt.”

“I did, in a way, only I didn’t realize what I was choosing,” I said, reaching for her hand.  “I never intended to hurt any of you.  Adam really didn’t say anything to you?  Either of you?”  I looked to Sam.

“He did not.  He merely said you’d taken her someplace safe where no one could hurt her and that you’d be back when the time was right.”

“I swear to God, I’m going to kill him.”

“Your absence has taken its toll on him as well,” Sam said softly and Daphne agreed.

“Yes, he’s changed a lot since you left.”

“Changed how?”

Daphne’s nose scrunched up as she thought it over.  “I don’t know, it’s like he’s nice or something.  He found us this place, and took care of Sam’s identity when he first came back, all that kind of stuff.”

He’d always looked after Sam financially.  “Money doesn’t change anything.”  It was Adam’s stock in trade, throw money at a problem instead of getting personally involved.  “Has he been hanging around with you?  Showing interest in your actual lives?”

“Well… no,” she admitted.  “He said being around us gave him a toothache.” 

“That sounds more like the Adam I know.”  So much for change. 

Sam yawned.  A big, jaw cracking, yawn that soon had Daphne yawning in return.  I realized I’d never seen Sam look sleepy before. 

“It’s getting late, I should probably get going,” I realized aloud, but Daphne stopped me from getting up.

“No wait… you’re staying here with us, aren’t you?” 

“Oh, I don’t know…” I hated to intrude into their perfect reality.  I was starting to realize that the less interaction I had with people, the happier they’d be. 

“Like you said, it’s late.  Do you have anywhere else to go?”

“No, not really,” I admitted.  I wasn’t even sure if my debit card would work anymore, the date on the front was expired. 

“Then it is settled, you will stay with us,” Sam beamed. 

“You’ll have to sleep on the couch, but it’s super comfy. I crash on it all the time.”

“Yes, I crash there quite frequently when she snores.”

“I do not snore!” she scowled, nudging him with her elbow.

“I crash there quite frequently when she doesn’t snore,” he said, completely straight faced. 

How could I say no to that?  “Thanks, guys.  I’m sure it’ll be fine.” 

Daphne gave me a big fat smile, squeezing my arm with a squeal of triumph.  “Let me get you something to sleep in.” 

That sounded like heaven.  “Thanks.  I’ve been wearing the same two pairs of clothes for longer than I like.”

“Oh, in that case, I’ll get you something to wear for tomorrow then too.  It’s only fair since Parker gave me most of your old baby clothes.”

“He did?  What happened to the rest of my stuff?”

“I’m not sure,” she shrugged.  “I think he probably has it packed away somewhere.”

Super. 

The mechanics of getting me blankets and clothes and cleaning up our garbage from the pizza fest took up the better part of a half hour.  Though I’d had a pretty tiring day, I found I couldn’t fall asleep.  Not because the couch wasn’t comfy as promised, but because I couldn’t shut my stupid brain off.  It wasn’t all that late out, not by my standards.  The longer I lay there, the more I started thinking about seeing Parker again. 

Chapter Twenty-Four

While I could’ve been certain of finding Parker awake in the old days, I had no idea what his hours were now.  All I knew was, I couldn’t begin to think about visiting him at home.  The thought of seeing him with his new family… it made my palms sweat just thinking about it. 

I had no idea if he even worked at any of the coffee shops he owned, or if his name was only on the paperwork.  He’d always been a hands on guy, but a lot could change in five years, as I was learning. 

Before I could talk myself out of it, I changed into Daphne’s borrowed clothes and slipped out, determined to find him.  I had to see him sooner or later, right?  Not that I expected him to chuck his life aside and declare how much he still loved me (okay maybe a tiny, evil part of me hoped for that), but we needed to talk.  If only for the chance to explain myself and why I’d disappeared off the face of the Earth so suddenly. 

There were three coffee shops for me to choose from, and I found him on the second stop.  I didn’t bother to make myself dim, I had nothing to hide.  It was late enough that there weren’t that many customers in the shop, and the door marked
office
was right next to the ladies room.  Without bothering to knock, I let myself in, shutting the door behind me when I spotted Parker, his head bent over the desk, deep in some task. 

“You still got another hour to go before your break, honey,” he said, without looking up.

“Really?  It seems like it’s long overdue.” 

I don’t know which one of us was more stunned.  No, I take that back.  Parker was more stunned, as in shocked. I was just incapable of saying or doing anything as I caught sight of his face.  I wanted to run up to him, to throw myself into his arms and have him tell me everything would be okay.  Instead I just stood there, the corner of my lip caught between my teeth as I waited for him to say something.  Anything.