Mercy's Angels Box Set (19 page)

              Fuck, fuck, fuck and double fucking cluster-fuck. Ella’s phone was switched off, she had left Bouquets and Rebecca assured me she had no idea where she had gone. Ella had apparently said she needed to take care of something, but Rebecca eventually confessed her words were more of a goodbye. She hadn’t returned to her apartment but Annie assured me she had spoken to Ella and she was fine. Annie had offered to work Thanksgiving and Ella was watching Eli for the night. I was stuck at Mercy’s now filling in for a night shift and tomorrow I had that fucking ball. The punch’s that landed on the bag in the basement were unforgiving. Somewhere over the last week I had found a measure of peace at the thought of broken little Sarah, but now Ella had me tied up in knots all over again. I needed to tell her everything Dillon had discovered, she needed to know about her mother and I needed to make things right between us. The last part I had no idea how to do. Taking Selena to this damn Thanksgiving Ball was a betrayal and downright disrespectful to Ella. Doing it for Mercy’s was one thing, doing it for Selena was another thing altogether.

              “You think hitting that bag is going to answer all your problems?” Dave stood on the stairs behind me. I cast him a quick glance between punches.

              “Nope, but sure as hell makes me feel better.” David grunted and sat down. “What are you doing here tonight? Mercy kick you out?” I joked. It was David’s night off and night shift workers really did appreciate going home to a warm house and comfy bed after working a couple of shifts in the shelter.

              “She needed sweets and I promised her I would also stop in and check on you. Have you spoken to Ella?” With one final punishing blow to the bag I stopped and turned to face David.

              “Yep, she’s running.” I growled. David nodded.

              “It’s how she stays safe. Staying is scary as hell, especially with the shit going on. She doesn’t really need or want all this high maintenance drama on top of her own crap.” I wiped the hair from my eyes in frustration.

              “I don’t know how to fix it Dave. I don’t know how to take back what I did, what I said.” David thought for a moment.

              “You can’t take back what you said. You can only make it right, look forward rather than back. I know the ball is a big deal as far as sponsorship and donations go, but is it worth losing Ella over?”

              “That’s the thing, if I answer truthfully and say no doesn’t that make me a heartless prick? I’d be letting down all the women who need the shelter. I’d be letting down Mercy.” David was careful at choosing his words again.

              “So, you’re sacrificing one for the good of many? You see going to the ball as sacrificing Ella and choosing the shelter?” I leaned against the wall contemplating David’s words.

              “I want both. I need Mercy’s Shelter, I need to keep it running for Mercy, for me, fuck for you, but mostly for the women who need the shelter and safety. And I need Ella. My need for her is fucking all consuming. The need to protect her, love her, fuck it borders on painful Dave. I don’t know how to have both.” David shrugged.

              “I’m kind of insulted that you would think you’re the only man around here who scrubs up okay in a tux.” I’m sure the dumbfounded look on my face was priceless and David’s low chuckle confirmed it.

              “You would do that? You would take Selena Liander to this stupid Ball? It’s Thanksgiving David you’re supposed to be with Mercy.” David rubbed a hand down his face.

              “Damn Jax, I have three grown daughters that keep me on my toes. I’m sure I can put up with a spoilt brat like Selena for one night. As for Thanksgiving, as long as you spend it with Mercy, here at the shelter I’m okay with that and I have no doubt she will okay with it to.”

              I nodded and for the first time in a week, I smiled and it didn’t feel forced. “It will piss Selena off. I need a photo of her reaction when you knock on her door. Promise me you will take a photo.” David laughed.

              “I’m sure I can do that. Now get upstairs and clean up that kitchen, it’s a bloody disgrace.” I pulled off the boxing gloves and threw them onto a nearby table, following David up the stairs.

              “I helped Mary cook so that might have something to do with the mess.” David looked back over his shoulder,

              “Mary let you cook?” He chuckled.

              “Yep, I told her I wanted cooking lessons, she accepted and now I know she is regretting it.” I grinned at the memory of Mary all flustered and yelling obscenities at me as I apparently ruined the sauce for the spaghetti meatballs.

              Twenty minutes later, as I wiped down the last bench in the kitchen my phone rang from my back pocket. Glancing at the screen I noted Dillon’s name and quickly answered it.

              “What’s up?” I asked and Dillon’s usual grunt confirmed that whatever it was it wasn’t good.

              “This cluster fuck makes Afghanistan look like a ball park.” He grumbled. “Rita is a good friend, silent, didn’t even blink when I asked her if she knew Ella Munroe. I get the feeling she genuinely didn’t know Marcus Fairmont, perhaps she doesn’t know the whole Ella story.”

              “Fairmont still there?”

              “Yep. He’s an easy tail. From home to work with a quick stop in between to sample his latest flavor, a twenty-four year old waitress named Chloe. Good Doctor Theo is interesting though. I discovered the doc has two files for Ella and her mother. The office file and the home file and since the bastard doesn’t have a clue about home security I was able to have a thorough peek. Seems Doctor Theo has been a longtime friend of Marcus Fairmont, even saw him as a patient fifteen years ago. Our Marcus has some deep fucked up issues Sarge. Goes all the way back to his own father who beat the shit out of him on a regular basis and a mother who apparently had a never ending supply of men who frequented the home while hubbie was working. You’ll never believe this, Mrs. Fairmont senior committed suicide, cut her wrists.” I groaned, caught somewhere between disbelief and horror. “I get the feeling Doctor Theo doesn’t completely trust Fairmont and is keeping this second set of files, the real files, as his back up. All Ella’s claims of abuse are documented in there as well as the apparent suicide. Theo goes as far as to state he believed Ella’s claims, even states that he believes Fairmont was entirely capable of cutting her wrists. He’s got video footage of all of their sessions and in many you can clearly see the bruises.” I suddenly needed to pound something again.

              “Son of a bitch believed her and left her with that fucker?” I roared.

              “Doctor Theo is well paid Jax, better than your average psychiatrist. He’s fucking loaded and I have no doubt if I dug through those finances I’d find a trail leading right back to Fairmont or something illegal.”

              “Then dig. This is good stuff Dillon this is the sort of stuff that will put the fucker away for a very long time.”

              “Not the devil himself could stop me now Jax. We’re onto something big here and I’m gonna’ see it through.”

              “Call me when you have something else.” With the conversation ended I was far too wound up to sleep. Beth had the first shift and I collapsed restlessly onto the couch in Mercy’s office. I found myself staring at Ella’s phone number. My fingers moved across the keys as if controlled by a force outside of my own influence.

              Please don’t run angel. Trust me. I made you a promise and I won’t break it.

              There was no reply, but I wasn’t really expecting one. I threw the phone to one side and tried in vain to get some sleep. Come morning I needed to find Ella and I would turn the town upside down to do so.

              I woke before the sun had risen, my mind pulled from a deep slumber by the horror that this day brought with it. I don’t think even death itself could contain my grief. I wanted to cry, I needed to cry. I needed to scream at the heavens over the injustice of it all. Him up there, he took my dad, he stole him and left me alone, defenseless and today I hated him for it. Tomorrow I would find my forgiveness again but today I would allow the hate to consume me, but those damned tears would still not come. I dragged the sketch book and charcoal Jax had bought me onto my lap and began to draw. It was the same picture, the same pose, over and over every year on the same day. I was so scared of forgetting what my dad looked like that on the anniversary of his death, every year I forced myself to confront my heartache and sketch my dad just as I remembered him. His eyes were identical to mine, dark brown and slightly slanted with the Asian ancestry that laced our family tree. His hair was black like the night sky and dead straight and he wore it long to his shoulders, sometimes tied at the nape of his neck. In my picture it was out, like a warrior of old, I loved it. His cheek bones were high like mine, his lips not quite as full. His nose was straight and the lines around his eyes and mouth revealed the truth, this man laughed a lot. Not with my mother of course. He tried, he did everything he could to make that woman happy, but only with me did true happiness seem to find him. I remembered everything about my dad. I remembered the stories he told me before bed, I remember the pancakes he greeted me with the next day. He worked so hard, but somehow he never missed a thing. Every swim meet, dance recital, parent teacher night, everything, he was there for it all until that day, Thanksgiving ten years ago. I remember waking him with the huge box of decorations and we began decorating the tree and house. He didn’t look well, he looked tired but he didn’t stop for even a moment. He lifted me to put the angel on the top of the tree, we hung the wreath on the door, then he moved to the kitchen to make us lunch. That’s where it stopped, where my life as I knew it ended. It was likely one of the reason’s I hated cooking. The kitchen was the place where I had lost my dad. With the sketch finished I sat and stared at it for a long time and eventually found the strength to carefully fold the picture and stuff it to the bottom of my backpack, where the other pictures of him were folded and crammed away like the painful memory they were.

              I sat and stared at the wall for a long time. I couldn’t bring myself to eat or drink. A part of me screamed for Jax, for the strength and warmth he was filled with, for the strength and warmth he filled me with. Another part of me hated the pain he was going to put me through tonight.  I knew it was selfish of me, Mercy’s was above anything Jax and I might have represented. I had no idea if Selena had been telling the truth about the post ball celebrations she claimed her and Jax had planned. A small part of me saw the lie for what it was, but another part of me, the insecure woman inside of me wondered if there were any truth to her words. Perhaps Jax had realized after spending some time with me that the road to be travelled was just going to be too hard, filled with too many bumps.  I wasn’t attractive like Selena, I wasn’t perfect like her. Perhaps in the week we had been apart it reminded him how easy it was to be with Selena, no strings, just plenty of back scratching. The thought of Jax with Selena intimately made my stomach roll. I glanced at the red digital numbers on the clock beside the bed. It was already after 4pm. I had spent the entire day alone, in bed, staring at a wall feeling sorry for myself. It was time to clear the grief and funk from my head, starting with a scorching shower.

              Before I left for Annie and Eli’s I turned on my phone to check my messages. There was one text from Jax, I deleted it before I crumbled and read it. There were several missed calls from him too along with one from Rebecca. I tucked the phone into my back pocket and left the motel. The sky was dark gray, snow fell in a light flurry around me. Pulling my scarf tightly around my neck I made my way to Annie’s.

              “Are you okay?” Were the first words out of her mouth and I put on my best forced smile. I didn’t want her to worry about leaving Eli with me. 

              “I’m fine Annie, I stayed at a motel. Where’s Eli?” She shut the door behind me.

              “He’s having a bath. Have you seen Jax?” I shook my head and threw my bag down on the couch.  “No, I haven’t.” 

              “He’s desperate to get a hold of you. I promised I would ring him as soon as I spoke to you.” I shook my head at that.

              “Please Annie, not tonight. I’ll call him tomorrow, okay?” She grabbed her coat and shouldered her way into it.

              “Let’s talk about this later. I need to get to work. Thanks for watching him tonight, I know its Thanksgiving and all but the pay for working tonight was just too good to refuse.”

              “It’s not a problem Annie. I love hanging out with Eli and I didn’t have any plans anyway.” Annie pulled me into a hug.

              “There’s some leftover turkey in the fridge, Eli and I had a small party for lunch. You would have been here for it if I could have gotten a hold of you. What did you do, throw out your phone?” I pulled it out and waved it before her.

              “Sorry, it’s been turned off. It’s on now, so if you need anything just holler.” Satisfied, Annie left for work and I dragged Eli’s thoroughly wrinkled body from the warmth of his bath. As we sat reading in the lounge room, Christmas Carols played from the small stereo in the background. It was quiet and cozy, reminding me of the many peaceful nights I got to spend with my dad, reading tales of princes and princesses and long lost kingdoms. A loud thumping at the door made both Eli and I jump, interrupting the reverent moment.

              “Annie, let me the fuck in, I know you’re in there!” An unfamiliar voice roared. I was frozen in place as Eli’s little hands gripped my arm.

              “Daddy?” He whimpered his eyes wide with fear, his quiet cry little more than a breath off his lips.

              Bang Bang Bang. The door shook with the force of his pounding.

              “Open this fucking door or I swear to god I will break it down!”

              “Shit,” I breathed heavily, panic threatening to consume me. More banging broke my immobile state and I turned to look at Eli, he was terrified, his eyes wide and in shock. I had to hold myself together for Eli. With a long deep calming breath I stood and dragged Eli by his hand down the hallway and into his room. I hesitated a moment and turned back to face the bathroom. If Phillip got into the apartment and went looking for Eli, his bedroom would be the first place he checked. The banging on the door grew more forceful and Eli cried quietly behind me as I pulled him into the bathroom. I swung open the cabinet under the sink and pulled out the clean towels, throwing them into the tub beside me.

              “Get in,” I whispered. Eli hesitated. It was a small space and once I closed the door it would be dark.

              “Here,” I pulled out my phone and handed it to him. “You can use it as a light. Get in.” Eli pulled his knees up to his chest and tucked down his head as he sat in the small space. “Look at me little man,” his frightened eyes found mine. “I need you to be a big brave boy and call the police. You know the numbers right?” He nodded. “Good boy, tell them the address, tell them to come quickly. You stay right here and don’t make a sound till I come get you, got it?” His nod was hesitant. “Promise me Eli, not a sound. You stay put and you stay still and quiet, no matter what.” He nodded and I quickly kissed his brow before closing the door and racing back into the living room. The door splintered apart as an enormous brute of a man stood panting, his eyes dilated and simmering in complete rage.

              “Who the hell are you?” I demanded of him, the strength in my words a lie.

              “Where’s Annie, where’s Eli, where the fuck is my boy?” He roared moving towards me. I stood my ground. I learnt with Marcus that cowering only seemed to excite him, standing tall and proud pissed him off but also turned him off.

              “Annie is at work, Eli is with a friend. I’m Annie’s roommate Ella.” I couldn’t lie about the apartment not being Annie’s place the photos of Eli on the fridge gave it away instantly.

              “Call him, I want him here with me in the next five minutes or I swear to god I will fucking knock you into next week.” I slowly nodded.

              “I don’t have a phone. If you have a phone I will call him right now.” He slid the phone from his pocket and handed it to me.

              “Let me see the number you’re dialing, I want to make sure you’re not calling the police.” I held the phone out with trembling fingers and dialed the only number I could think of, Jax. The phone rang once, twice, three times. Please answer Jax, I quietly prayed. I knew he would be at the ball and this would likely ruin his night, but right now, in this moment, I really didn’t give a shit.

              “Hello?” I almost whimpered at the sound of his deep strong voice.

              “Hey, it’s me Ella, can you bring Eli home? There is someone here to see him.” Jax was quiet for a moment.

              “Angel, what’s going on, whose number is this?”

              “I know it’s late and he’s probably supposed to be in bed, but it’s kind of important.”

              “Put it on speaker,” growled Phillip in front of me.

              “Fuck angel, who is that?” I pulled the phone away and put it on speaker.

              “Hey, yeah, so could you get Mary to wake him up and bring him home? Annie’s not home yet, but she won’t be far away.” There was a short pause.

              “Sure Ella, I’ll have Mary bring him round now. Everything okay?”

              “Yeah, all good.” Phillips eyes drilled into mine with unforgiving anger.

              “I have to go. Thanks for that, just be sure to bring him straight here.”

              “Mary’s on her way now.” Phillip grabbed his phone and disconnected the call. His eyes suddenly appraised me, looking me up and down, then searching my eyes as if looking for something more.

              “He’s on his way, but I can assure you when he sees that door and you all freaked out he’s gonna’ be scared shitless.” Without warning Phillip backhanded me and I hit the wall, my cheek screaming with pain. I touched the spot where his hand had connected with me and turned to face him, no tears, no terror, just pure hatred and rage.

              “And that’s not going to fucking help you either,” I spat. When he moved to hit me again I ducked and his fist connected with the plaster wall. I moved behind the couch, putting both distance and an object between us. He stalked me across the room and I kept moving, keeping distance between us, but always keeping my body between him and Eli. “You need to settle down,” I suggested.

              “She took my fucking son away from me,” he growled. Then he lunged. His movements were faster than I had expected as he jumped over a chair and backed me into the wall, his hand reaching for me and wrapping around my neck. His eyes regarded mine as he began to squeeze.

              For a moment my brain scrambled, then something clicked and I remembered Jax showing me how easily I could take down an attacker. I raised my knee and found Phillips groin. He grunted and his grip loosened but he continued to push his body hard against mine, not giving me room to kick. As dark spots began to swim in my vision I reached up and pressed my fingers into his eye sockets. With a scream he finally let me go. The roar from the doorway behind us registered as I slid down the wall into a wilted heap.