MILITARY ROMANCE: The War Within Himself (Alpha Bad Boy Marine Army Seal) (Contemporary Military Suspense & Thriller Romance) (172 page)

She gasped when he took her hand and kissed it gently. This dark-haired man with brown eyes captured her love in that moment. Unfortunately, she was seeing Herb, so she couldn’t in good conscience see Matthew, as well.

Her heart ached at the thought that she would never be able to see what kind of man Matthew was. She was eighteen now, and she could marry if she wanted to. Her parents had always told her that they would never object to a man she chose, as long as he didn’t hurt her. But how would she know if she never got to let Matthew court her? How would she
get
him to court her?

After two months and several conversations with her mother, she still couldn’t decide. She’d seen Matthew at other parties, and he’d watched her from afar. She knew that because she’d watched him, too. It was time, she decided, to talk to her “sister” instead. Granted, Elise had no real experience with men other than Michael and Timothy, who asked her to join them if they didn’t have another woman to escort.

That night, Bridget closed the dressing partition that they kept between their beds in case they wanted privacy and sat cross-legged on her bed. Elise sat with her back against her headboard with a book in her hand. She dog-eared the page and set the book on her nightstand when Bridget pushed aside the partition.

“What is it?” Elise asked. “I know something’s been bothering you lately, but I didn’t want to intrude.”

“Something has,” Bridget replied. “I want Matthew Clement to court me.”

“Herb’s cousin?”

“He watches me when we’re at the same parties, just like I watch him. So I think he’s interested. But Herb is courting me. How do I get Matthew to ask me to a party or something?”

“You’re asking
me
?” Elise asked in shock. “I don’t know anything about men and courting. You should ask your mother.”

“I did, but she doesn’t know that much about men and courting, either. Da was the only suitor she ever had. They fell in love shortly after she moved in with his uncle. Neither one of them ever had another companion.”

“Do you want to know what I would do?” Elise asked.

“What?”

“I would tell Herb that it isn’t going to work out for you, that you aren’t really interested in him. Once you two are no longer together, maybe Matthew will ask you to parties.”

“I’ll try that.”

Bridget was surprised by how well Elise’s advice worked. Within two months of telling Herb that she didn’t want to see him anymore, Matthew called on her and invited her to a party. Thrilled, Bridget accepted the invitation.

From that moment on, she and Matthew were nearly inseparable. He visited her every night at the house; they went to parties together; he even took her to dinner at restaurants.

A year and a half passed before Elise shattered Bridget’s happiness. Elise had met a wealthy Swedish family who wanted to take her to Illinois as a private interpreter and teacher. It was another opportunity that Elise couldn’t turn down, just like she couldn’t turn down the opportunity to live with Bridget and her family.

Bridget wept unashamedly as Elise packed her bags. After Elise said good-bye and thanked the rest of the family, she and Bridget hugged tightly at the front door, promising to write every other week. When Elise pulled away, Bridget saw that she, too, was crying.

“I’ll never forget you, Bridget,” Elise told her. “You’re the only sister I’ve ever had—and the only one I ever want. I love you and your family.” She turned to gaze over at Mary and Patrick. “You gave me a family when I really needed one, and I can never repay you for that. If you ever need me for anything, please don’t hesitate to write and tell me.”

When Bridget could no longer see the hansom cab that took Elise away, she raced to her room and lay on Elise’s bed. She sobbed into the pillow until she fell asleep.

The next time Matthew took her to a party at their friend’s home, he pulled her off to a secluded spot and asked, “What’s bothering you, Bridget? You’re not your normally cheerful self.”

“Elise left,” Bridget announced.

“I heard.”

“I miss her. I’m afraid I’ll never see her again.”

He pulled her close and kissed the top of her head. “I’m here, sweetheart, and I’m not going anywhere.”

Snuggling into his arms, she wrapped hers around him. “Thank you. I needed to hear that.” She turned her gaze on his handsome face. “But you’re not a girl. It’s not the same.”

“Would it help even more if I said that I love you?”

Bridget’s eyes widened. “You love me?”

“Yes.” He kissed her forehead then her cheek. “Very much. I never want to lose you.”

“I love you, too, Matthew.”

His lips met hers for a sweet kiss as they had many times before. Then everything changed. His lips bore down on hers, sending waves of excitement through her. She collapsed even closer against him, letting her body lean fully against his.

They moved together, Matthew pushing her backward until her legs hit something solid. The settee in the sitting room they occupied. She went weak when he lifted her and lay her down on it. He came down upon her. His pelvis ground against her, and he grasped her covered breast tenderly.

Breathing hard, she didn’t complain when his hand slipped into her low-cut bodice to fondle her naked mound. She inhaled deeply when his finger touched her nipple.

The feelings were incredible! She wanted to feel more of him. He moved as though he’d read her mind, and his leg slipped between hers. The new position expanded the sensations in her body. She couldn’t hold her body still as she writhed beneath him.

His fingers moved and unbuttoned her bodice. He pushed the material out of his way and finally broke the kiss. Staring down at her naked torso, he said, “My God, Bridget! You have the most perfect breasts I’ve ever seen.”

“Thank you,” she replied, not knowing what else to say.

His lips kissed one breast then he moved to the other, where he sucked for just a few moments. Now her body ached for him. She could feel his maleness against her thigh. He kissed his way back up to her lips and gave them a quick peck.

“I want you, Bridget,” he said softly. “I want to show you how much I love you.”

Bridget knew what
that
meant! Her brothers had always warned her about men wanting it before marriage.

With all her strength, she pushed Matthew off her and pulled her bodice together. As she refastened her buttons, she said, “Not now, Matthew. We just declared our love. It’s too soon.”

“What if I ask to marry you? Then can we?”

“Are you proposing marriage?” she asked in shock.

“I’m saying that I want to marry you. First, I need to ask your parents for their blessing. But that day
will
come, Bridget, and it will come soon.”

Unsure how to respond, Bridget said nothing. She loved Matthew, yes, but she wasn’t sure if she was ready to accept a marriage proposal. Of course, she wasn’t ready to turn one down, either.

“Let’s just go back to the party,” she finally suggested.

Later that night, Bridget wrote her first letter to Elise, explaining everything that happened at the party. She didn’t know an address so she just addressed the envelope to Elise Anderson at Bishop Hill, Illinois. Elise had told her it wasn’t a big town, so somebody there should know who she was.

On Christmas day, Matthew got down on one knee and asked Bridget for her hand in marriage. Since he hadn’t tried anything untoward since the party, she accepted without hesitation. It was then that Bridget finally wrote the words in big bold letters.

“I’M GETTING MARRIED, Elise. Would you come to the wedding and be my maid of honor?”

But before the wedding, her life took an embarrassing turn.

Stina

Stina Lennartsdotter hated the idea of moving to America. She didn’t want to leave her friends in Sweden, but her parents wanted to follow their religious friends to Bishop Hill, Illinois. That was where Erik Jannson and many of his Janssonist followers fled for religious freedom.

Her mother, Anna Hansdotter, had told her that the religious group had disbanded in 1861, but she still had friends there and wanted to join them. Her husband, Lennart Bengtsson, never turned down her wishes.

Now the entire family of seven stood at the ship rail watching the round building grow larger as they approached it.

Tall, balding Lennart laid a hand on his daughter’s shoulder and spoke in Swedish. “Our life will be better in Bishop Hill, Stina.”

She replied in the same language since they had yet to learn English. “But we don’t know English, Pappa. How will life be better?”

“I plan to find someone to teach us. Besides, there are many Swedes in Bishop Hill. You will be able to talk to them, I’m sure.”

Stina wasn’t that sure. She didn’t want to go to Bishop Hill, and she didn’t want to learn English. She just wanted to go home.

Before long, the ship docked, and the gangplank lowered. Lennart and Anna herded their five children toward the boat exit and down to the dock. Finally, they were on American soil.

This place doesn’t seem like such a wonderful place
, Stina thought. It was smelly and crowded with all the people around her.

Clinging to her mother’s skirt so they didn’t get separated, she moved along with the crushing flow of people. Outside the front door, several people stood with signs. One read
Sverige.
Her parents headed toward the sign held by a young woman.

“
Är du svensk
?” the woman asked.

“
Ja
,” Lennart replied.

“Stand behind me, please,” the woman said in Swedish. “We will see if there are any others then go to the registration tables.”

A few more people joined them by the time the ship emptied, and Stina stood close to the woman.

Finally, the woman spoke in perfectly accented Swedish, “I am Elise Anderson. I will be helping you today. If you will follow me, I’ll take you where we need to go.”

Stina was nearly the same height as Elise and glared over at her.

“You don’t want to be in America?” Elise asked.

“
Nej
,” Stina admitted.

“”What’s your name?”

“Stina.”

“Stina? I always liked that name. I had hoped my parents would name a sister that, but I never had a sister.”

“Only brothers?”

“No brothers, either.”

“Sometimes I wish I didn’t have brothers or sisters. Do you live here?”

“In New York? Yes. Where are you going?”

“Bishop Hill. Somewhere in Illinois.”

“I’ve heard of that place before. I understand there is wonderful farmland there. Is your father a farmer?”

“
Ja
,” Stina said.

“He should do well there, then.” Elise stopped by a long table, and spoke to the group. “You will be checking in at this table. I will be right here to help anyone who needs it. If you want help when you’re ready to leave, please wait nearby until I’m done with all the passengers on this ship, and I’ll be happy to be of assistance.”

As the first family in Elise’s line, Lennart Bengtsson led his brood to the table. The American man behind it spoke just enough Swedish to question the newcomers and tell them that they all needed one name. Since Lennart was the head of the family, they would all have Bengtson as their last name, with only one S. Lennart agreed, but Stina glared at the man. She didn’t want to change her last name; she was sixteen and was used to Lennartsdotter.

When asked her name, Stina gave it. The man repeated, “Christina?”

“
Ja
,” Anna said.

“
Nej
!” Stina said. To her mother, she declared, “I don’t want to change my name. I want it just Stina. Christina isn’t my name.”

“All right, dear,” Anna agreed before she told the man, “Stina, not Christina.”

The family all gave their names, with the male names being change from
Jan
to John and
Per
to Peter. Stina’s sisters got to keep their names, Karin and Ida. When they were done registering, Lennart directed his family to stand near Elise, who smiled over at Stina.

“I’m glad you got to keep your given name, Stina,” Elise said. “It must be hard for a teenager to come to a new country and immediately get a new name.”

Impressed that Elise understood, Stina chatted with her while everyone else in their group finished at the table. Stina was glad that someone else spoke Swedish and just wanted to hear a voice other than her family’s. Once in a while, Stina glanced at her father, who watched them while everyone waited.

When everyone else was done and directed to where they wanted to go, Elise turned to Lennart and asked, “Is there something more I can help you with?”

“I understand that you don’t know us and that this may sound like an odd request, but I was wondering if you have family in New York.”

“No, sir. I have no family in the country.”

“I’ve been watching you, and you seem to have a way with my willful daughter. This is what I’m proposing: I will pay your way to Illinois and all of you expenses when we get there if you will join us. We need a translator and teacher. Would you do that?”

“An opportunity to see another part of the country? That would be nice, but I would need time to prepare.”

“Is three days enough? We will be staying at a hotel that long to rest from our journey here. Then we will take the New York Central train to our new home.”

“Yes,” Elise replied, shaking Lennart’s hand. “That will be sufficient. And thank you for the job. I will meet you at that train station in three days.”

As Elise walked away to resume her duties, Stina bit her lower lip gently. To her surprise, she was glad that Lennart had hired Elise. That meant she would have somebody she could talk to on the trip to Bishop Hill, as well as someone who understood how she felt about being in America. She could only hope that Elise didn’t change her mind.

Three days later, the Bengtson family arrived at the train depot, to find Elise waiting outside with a large and a small carpetbag. They bought her a ticket and the party boarded the westbound train. The family found enough seats on one car where they could all sit together. Stina, Karin and Elisa chose one row, with Karin taking the window seat. Stina sat in the middle, and Elisa sat beside the aisle.

Before this moment, Stina had resented her parents for bringing her so far away from home, but now she was excited. Was it because she had a new friend already? Or did she suddenly realize that this trip was an adventure, as Elise called it? Either way, it didn’t matter. She was thrilled to be headed across the United States of America.

“Would you start teaching me English?” Stina asked in Swedish.

With a smile, Elise nodded and replied in English, “Yes.”

“Yes,” Stina repeated.

And that began her friendship with Elise. From then on, Stina thought of Elise as the big sister she’d never had. She listened carefully as Elise showed her items and gave the English word for them. Elise obviously kept things simple, especially while they were on the trains that took them to Chicago, across Illinois to Rock Island, and then down to Galesburg.

Karin began learning, too, as did Peter. The younger children had shorter attention spans, so they learned at times and played or slept at other times. By the time they reached Galesburg several days later, they had already begun their English language education, although Stina found that it was difficult at times.

Once they reached Galesburg, Illinois, they disembarked from the train, and Lennart and Elise bartered with a man, who eventually agreed to take them the thirty miles to Bishop Hill on his buckboard.

Upon reaching their destination, Lennart paid for the man to stay at the hotel so he could return to Galesburg the next day. Then the Bengtson party made their way to the large, barn-like structure with stairs on the outside leading up to the second floor. As Anna Bengtson’s friend had explained in a letter, this was the church, which also served as housing. Once colonists had lived there, but now it was set aside for newcomers to the town. Downstairs, the letter that Anna had let Stina read, housed the colonists, and the sanctuary was upstairs. Stina decided they put the newcomers up there to make sure they all attended church, since Bishop Hill had been founded by Erik Jansson, a religious zealot who believed he was a prophet of God.

Once there, they finally met Anna’s friend, Ingrid, a woman who looked much older than Stina’s mother, although Anna had told Stina that their birthdays were only a week apart. After hugs and introductions, Ingrid showed everyone to their rooms. The boys went into one, and Stina, Karin and Elise had another one. Lennart, Anna and the youngest child entered in a third room.

Stina looked around their cramped quarters. This was nothing like their home in Sweden, where she and Karin had a large room to themselves. This room was probably half the size and furnished with three beds, two nightstands, a washbasin, a dresser and an armoir. Two beds shared a nightstand, so the middle bed had a nightstand on each side of it.

Stina frowned. She did
not
like this arrangement. As much as she liked Elise, she didn’t want to have to share a room with two other people. It was bad enough that she’d had to share with her younger sister in Sweden.

“Which bed do you want?” Stina asked Elise in Swedish.

“It doesn’t matter to me,” Elise responded in the same language. “You two decide, and I’ll take the one left over.”

Karin claimed the bed next to the window, and Stina reluctantly took the one nearest the door. Elise said that, if Stina wanted the middle one so she could use both nightstands, she would take the bed by the door. Stina didn’t hesitate and moved to the middle bed, offering to trade each week they were there. Elise agreed, and they all got ready for bed.

The townsmen came together and built a new house for the Bengtsons by the end of the following week. Stina was amazed at how little time it took with so many men working on it. The women worked, too, on things like painting and decorating.

The house was enormous and had seven bedrooms—one for each child, one for the parents, and one for Elise. Even though the rooms were smaller than she was used to, Stina was excited to have a place to call her own. If she wanted to be alone and have no smaller children disturb her, she could.

Days of education from Elise turned into months. Stina progressed well with English, even to the point of being able to pronounce her Ws and Js correctly,
if
she concentrated on it. And she loved the Friday night youth meetings in the church sanctuary. They gathered together for worship, and afterward, they stayed for a social hour, which often lengthened to two or three hours.

At these socials, she met three suitors. Given that it was a small community, all three knew of the other’s intentions toward Stina, but she didn’t care. She enjoyed the attention. What she really wanted, though, was the attention of Lars Olson. Unfortunately, he was courting Elise, so Stina needed to wait to see if they would remain a couple.

One day, Nels Osterberg invited her for a walk in the nearby woods, which she accepted without hesitation. She truly liked Nels and was considering telling the other two young men that she wanted him only.

“Stina,” Nels asked when they were alone, “would you please let just me court you? I know I can make you happier than they can.”

“Yes, Nels,” she agreed. “I will.”

The tall, blond with blue eyes grabbed her in a bear hug and spun around with her in his arms several times. Stina laughed with joy. When he stopped turning, he lost his balance before he could put her down, and they both fell to the ground.

With Stina atop him, he grasped the back of her head and pushed it toward him until their lips met. He kissed her with abandon, and she gladly accepted his embrace. Then he flipped her onto her back and lay atop her with his body between her legs. She knew she shouldn’t allow this, but it felt good to have him there.

Before she could compose herself, he had removed his shirt and unbuttoned her bodice to release her breasts. Stina wasn’t ashamed, though. In fact, she liked the way he fondled her. She liked the excitement that grew between her legs in response to him. And she most decidedly liked the way he moved his pelvis against hers.

He lifted her hips and worked her skirts up around her waist. Since she hated undergarments, she usually didn’t wear any and today was no different. With her skirts out of the way, her womanhood lay naked for him to view.

“Oh, God, Stina,” he whispered as he unbuttoned his trousers.

His penis released, he collapsed down upon her again. This time, their genitals lay naked against each other as he ground against her. Her body reacted in a way she never expected it could. She was warm all over, but she was shivering with excitement.