Miriam and the Stranger (34 page)

Mose turned and walked away without answering. He had totally misjudged the situation. These people could not be trusted. Once again he had made a wrong decision and embarrassed himself.

“What have we now?” the watching Amish workmen greeted him when he got back to the worksite. “An Amish television evangelist?”

Mose forced himself to join in their laughter but said no more about the matter. They were all hard at work ten minutes later while the camera crews hugged the road and flashed their bright lights at them.

Chapter Thirty-Three

A
fter the hymn singing, Miriam slipped out of the washroom door with her shawl pulled tight over her shoulders. The brisk December air had a bite to it, not unlike the evening that lay ahead of her. She would speak with Mose tonight as the
bann
was lifted and he would drive her home. The horrible episode with the
Englisha
newspeople didn’t count as part of the
bann
. Mose had barely looked at her other than when the cameras had been in their faces. She had tried to play her part after Uncle William had explained why the media people were there. That Tyler would spread such an awful rumor caused more hurt than how Mose had acted.

Her face had burned with shame at the accusation of what the world called an “affair,” but Uncle William was right. If she had refused to respond and had stayed in the house, Mose would have thought she was guilty of more than a kiss with Tyler. Now her only hope was to get a fresh start with Mose… if he would still have her.

Miriam searched the darkness for the buggy Mose was driving while he was in Oklahoma. For once he had acted like a real suitor by coming to the hymn singing and now driving her home. Perhaps he was trying to make amends for the hard time she had gone through this past week.

“Please help me, dear Lord,” Miriam whispered, offering a quick prayer as she caught sight of Mose’s buggy parked at the end of the line. She tried to slip past the other buggies unnoticed, but she knew all eyes must be on her. The
bann
wouldn’t affect her reputation greatly, but people were still curious. Mose still hadn’t revealed to the community what had been her moral failure. Nor would he, which was as much to shield himself from shame as anything.

But those weren’t decent thoughts, either. Miriam pushed them away. Behind her, Miriam heard the soft footsteps of other girls as they hurried to their families’s buggies. Miriam kept her head down. The community currently had two other dating couples, and both of them had left earlier. Mose had waited longer. He must not want to appear eager to leave with her. He was big on his dignity, which was appropriate for a bishop. She might as well get used to it.

Miriam pulled herself up the buggy step and slid into the seat beside Mose. His figure cut a stark outline against the prairie starlight that twinkled outside the open buggy door.

“
Gut
evening,” Mose said, his voice gruff.

“
Gut
evening,” Miriam responded.

Mose didn’t offer a buggy blanket, and he kept his door open. Perhaps Deacon Phillips had borrowed the blanket for some other purpose, Miriam thought. The notion did little, though, to warm the chill that cut through her shawl.

Mose didn’t seem to notice as he said, “The Lord’s blessing has
returned to us as we humbled ourselves and sought His grace this past week.”

Miriam hung her head. “I’m so sorry for what happened. I hope you can forgive me.”

“I suppose we all have our weaknesses.” Mose’s tone had lightened a little. “I was stirred in my heart today as I thought of your gracious spirit this past week, Miriam. You are a true woman of the Lord who has humbled herself in the sight of the congregation. I’m glad we decided to work through this problem.”

“You are kind to forgive me,” Miriam whispered.

“Things will go better for us this way,” Mose said with confidence. “Whatever happened between you and Tyler has now been properly repented of. A woman who humbles herself is a truly beautiful woman, Miriam.”

Miriam kept her head down and said nothing.

Mose continued, “Our wedding day will be a day of great gladness, not only on this earth but in heaven. The cause of God and His church will be glorified. Together we will stand and serve the congregation and each other in holiness and godly fear. I believe the Lord will give me
kinner
this time, Miriam. I feel a great hope rising in my heart.”

Heat streaks ran up her face at Mose’s words, but thankfully the darkness hid them. She would marry the man, but he didn’t have to speak so openly about
kinner.
Not yet, at least. The wedding wasn’t until next fall, unless… perhaps she should bring up the subject again. They might as well get this over with and begin their lives together.

Mose ignored her for a moment to gaze out into the star-filled skies. “The world cannot harm the people of God, Miriam,” he said. “That
Englisha
man tried to spread those awful rumors about you. But the Lord knows you have repented, and He protected us
on Friday morning. Let the world say what they will, but we will find hope in the Lord. God has given us a fresh start now.”

The horrible thought rose again, and Miriam spoke this time. “Mose, you don’t think I really… Mose, please. Tyler and I did nothing more than kiss, and I have confessed that.”

Mose regarded Miriam for a long moment. “I know how the
Englisha
people are. This Tyler must have many girlfriends. Why wouldn’t he think of you as another one of those?”

“But Mose,” Miriam protested.

He silenced her with a stern glance. “We will say no more about this. The
bann
has cleansed whatever you have done. Tyler’s actions with the fires and bringing the police into the community are enough to explain why such a harsh method was necessary. Any righteous man or woman would see what needed to be done, and you agreed quite readily to the punishment, so surely you felt the guilt of your actions.”

Miriam clutched her hands together. Her whole body felt so weak it couldn’t move. “But I told you, we only kissed. We did no such evil thing as was rumored.” Miriam struggled to keep her voice steady.

“Okay.” Mose smiled. “If that’s the way you want it, I will say no more about the matter.” Mose settled back in the buggy seat. “I hope there will be no more indiscretions in the future. Not that I can imagine how there could be, since Tyler’s gone, but I still say this as a godly warning.”

“I don’t suppose there can be,” Miriam told him. “But if you feel any doubts, maybe you had best assign someone to watch me each day until the wedding.”

Her sarcasm seemed to escape him.

“I have spoken with your Uncle William,” Mose said. “He will make sure that things are watched more closely from now on. He
now sees where he made grave mistakes in trusting this Tyler fellow and welcoming him into his home. If that hadn’t happened, perhaps you would not have been tempted like you were.”

The tears stung, but Miriam tried to hold them back.

Mose slowed for the Bylers’ driveway and parked by the hitching post. Miriam climbed down from the buggy to wait while Mose tied his horse. She expected flashbacks from the times when Wayne used to bring her home. Wayne would tie his horse at this exact spot, and her heart would sing with joy as she waited for him. Only she wouldn’t have been on her side of the buggy but right by Wayne’s side, perhaps even with her hand on his as Wayne secured his horse.

But none of those visions returned. Rather, she saw Tyler parked down the road on that evening he had taken her to the youth gathering. Tyler had known enough to stop well short of Uncle William’s driveway before he had taken her in his arms. Miriam stifled a whimper and pushed the memory away.

“Did you say something?” Mose asked as he appeared in front of her.

“No, I was just waiting.” Miriam fixed her gaze on the ground. Soon this would end, she comforted herself. Courage gripped her, and she reached out to grab Mose’s arm. “Can’t we move up the wedding date, please? Don’t you think this has gone on long enough?”

Mose hesitated before he pulled his arm away. “That is not the Lord’s way, Miriam. We must not give in to a solution that seems easy.” Mose paused, and a fierce look filled his eyes. “Is this why you pushed for an early wedding date before? Because of this temptation with the
Englisha
man? You had to have known of Tyler when you were in Wayne County, and you did not tell me? Is this not so?”

Miriam’s head spun. Now she had only made things worse.
Mose had obviously not thought of this angle yet. “Is that any worse than what you already suspect me of?” Miriam tried to breathe evenly as she waited for Mose’s answer.

Mose was silent for a moment and then said, “We had best leave that alone. The
bann
has taken care of your past. There isn’t much else we can do beyond what we have done.” Mose studied Miriam’s face as the tears trickled down her cheeks. He seemed touched, finally, and took her hand. “Come, there has been enough sorrow now. The great apostle told us that we must take up the erring member after a proper repentance.” Mose led the way toward the house. “We must leave this behind us now and move on.”

Miriam didn’t pull her fingers out of his hand when she opened the front door, and Mose didn’t either. Together they entered the house and seated themselves on the couch. Mose faced Miriam, and a smile crept over his face as he placed his free hand over the one he held. “You wouldn’t have something to eat, would you? I’m starved.”

Miriam forced herself to stand but had to grab the back of the couch for support. “Whoa there,” Mose teased. “Looks like you need some food yourself.”

She needed something else worse, Miriam told herself, but Mose wouldn’t understand. She wanted to be held close and comforted after what she had been through. Mose could at least give her a hug, couldn’t he? They were promised to each other. Would a hug be such an unholy thing?

Mose regarded her for a moment. “Do you need help in the kitchen perhaps? Maybe with finding the pies? I’m sure my nose will lead me right to them,” he joked.

Miriam forced a smile, though the effort cost her more than Mose would ever know. But she might as well get used to forced smiles. Mose wouldn’t change much—if at all—after they said the
marriage vows. The
bann
he had prescribed for her this past week shattered that illusion.

“Come,” Miriam forced the words out. “You can sit at the kitchen table while I find something.”

“That would be
gut
,” he said. “I would love to watch you. I haven’t had that much chance to be with you this week, and I do have to leave tomorrow. I won’t be seeing you again for a long time. I won’t make the trip again. You know that, don’t you?”

“
Yah
, I know that,” Miriam answered.

Mose smiled his thanks as he followed Miriam to the kitchen. He had once again misunderstood her, and she wouldn’t correct him. She would need all the months until school was out to prepare her heart to see Mose again. Much prayer and submission would be needed. That was something Mose obviously wouldn’t understand either.

Chapter Thirty-Four

I
t was Christmas Eve, and Miriam was driving home from school with the lines held loose in her hand. Star seemed to sense her mood and responded with a slower pace as they approached Highway 48. School hadn’t let out for the Christmas holidays until noon today because a week had been lost as a result of her
bann.
The pain of that memory lingered, and her work seemed to take twice as long to finish. Miriam hadn’t completed correcting all the student papers until a few moments ago. But it was better to work late now so she wouldn’t have to return to the schoolhouse until the Monday after New Year’s Day.