Mistletoe & Kisses (42 page)

Chapter Four

ISABELLA CRIES AND cries.  She doesn’t hold back.  “I’m so embarrassed, Daniel.  There must be something wrong with me.” 

“Why would you think that?  What did he do?”

It doesn’t surprise her that he knew it was something to do with Eric, but she really feels like it’s somehow a reflection of her, like she failed.  “Um . . . I don’t know where to start.  I’m not sure I know where it started.”  Her voice trembles and her hands shake. 

Daniel takes her hands in his and says, “Bella, it’s me.  You can tell me anything.” 

She always talked to him when they were growing up, why can’t she talk to him now?  “Daniel . . . I can’t believe I’m saying this after only a few years of marriage.  I left Eric.  I just can’t do it anymore.”  She wouldn’t look at Daniel when she spoke.  The embarrassment was clear in her voice and in her actions. 

“Bella, I’m so glad you finally did.  He is an asshole.”

“Wh-what?”  She finally looks up at him.  “What do you mean?  You are happy my marriage is over?”

“I’m not happy, but I knew it would happen eventually.  Eric wasn’t right for you, but you were swept up in the fantasy.  I prayed it would work out for you, but I’m not surprised it didn’t.  And look what he left behind  . . this frail, insecure woman who has no joy left.  It’s not you, Bella.  You were always the life of the party.  You brought happiness into every room, every life.  Then he came along and slowly tore that down.  I knew better than to say anything, though.  Once you met him, you stopped listening to me.  I’m so glad you’re home.”

“Wow.  I can’t believe you’ve felt like this for five years and never said anything.”

“When was I supposed to say something?  I didn’t want to make things harder when your mom or dad died.  Besides, it was too late once you got married.  Your dad made me promise I’d just be there when things fell apart.”

With tears streaming down her face, she grabs her bag and heads back to her childhood bedroom.  Everyone knew this would happen, but nobody tried to warn her.  Maybe coming home was a mistake.  Maybe she was right all along; her home was back in California, by the beach.  Sitting on the sand was the only place her soul ever felt at peace.  But how could she manage to afford living there?  She knows she’s stuck here, at least for a while.  After all, the house is paid for. 

Daniel follows her down the hall quietly, waiting for her to realize he’s taken her old room and fixed up the master bedroom for her. When she opens the door and sees all the change, she turns to look at him questioningly.  “Why are you in this tiny room?” 

“Let’s not talk about it tonight.  Just go to your room, the master bedroom, and get some rest.  We’ve got plenty of time to talk tomorrow.  I called my managers and told them I’d be taking a couple of days off, so I’ll be here when you wake up.   I have a friend coming to town tomorrow afternoon, and had planned to take the rest of the week anyway.  I know it’s weird, but he’ll be staying here.  I didn’t know you’d be here when we made the arrangements.” 

“That’s fine.  If you need to go to work tomorrow, you can.  You don’t have to babysit me.  I’ll be fine.”

“No worries.  I’m the boss, I can do what I want.”

“Do I know this friend of yours?”

“Do you remember Taylor Jenkins?  He was a year behind us.” 

“Yeah, I remember him.  It’ll be good to see him again.”  She fiddles a little bit, hoping Daniel doesn’t notice.  “I should get some sleep.  Thank you.  For everything.” 

“Anytime.  I love you, Bella.  Family sticks together.  You were my best friend, I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you, too.  Goodnight.” 

And with that, she goes to the master bedroom.  Once she’s alone, she can finally freak out a bit.  Of all the friends from high school to see right now, Taylor isn’t the one she’d pick.  He was the reason she ran off to New York in the first place.  She’d loved him for years, but he never noticed her.  He manage to notice all her friends, though.  Senior year, she finally got the courage to tell him how she felt and asked him to the Sadie Hawkins Dance.  He all but laughed at her and told her he could never date her.  He said he was waiting for someone else to ask him, and she knew she was too ugly for him.  After all, none of the boys had ever asked her out.  So, first chance she got, she ran off to a place where nobody knew her and she could get lost in the crowd. 

She was too raw to see him again, but how would she explain to Daniel why she was hiding away?  Why couldn’t she catch a break?  Knowing there is nothing she could do, she gets herself ready for bed and climbs in, hoping for a good night’s sleep so she’ll be able to deal with seeing Taylor in the morning.

Chapter Five

THE MORNING ARRIVES far too quickly. Groaning, she rolls out of bed and heads into the attached bathroom.  She didn’t think to ask when Taylor would be arriving, and she doesn’t want to be seen in this state of disarray, so she rushes to get ready. 

The steady stream of hot water hitting her is like heaven.  When she steps out, the bathroom smells of her shampoo and it helps her relax a little bit.  Knowing she’s already taken more time than she should have, she quickly fixes her hair and adds some light make-up.  After getting dressed, she heads into the kitchen for some breakfast. 

Isabella’s not surprised to see Daniel fixing breakfast for the two of them.  However, she is thankful it’s still only the two of them in the house.  “Mmmmm, it smells amazing in here.  Are you sharing whatever it is that you are making?”

“Of course I am.  When have I ever not shared with you?” 

Just hearing him say that takes her back to how things were in high school.  Daniel’s dad left him and Aunt Susan when he was a little boy, so there was never a man around.  Isabella’s dad did what he could for Daniel, but his job kept him busy.  Somehow, instead of feeling slighted, Daniel took it upon himself to be her big brother.  They lived around the corner from each other, their moms were sisters and very close, and they did everything together.  When they were little, other kids thought they were siblings; some even thought they were twins. 

“Earth to Bella.”

“Sorry, I was just thinking about when we were little.  You were the best big brother.”

He brings the plates over to the table and they eat while talking about the good old days.  They remember all the fun they used to have and laugh and laugh.  Isabella hasn’t felt this light and free in years.  In fact, the thought brings tears to her eyes. 

“Bella, what’s the matter?  What did I say?”

“You didn’t do anything.”  She wipes her eyes and tries to swallow down the lump forming in her throat.  She can’t stop it, though.  The tears she was trying so hard to hold back seep out anyway. 

It takes a few moments, but she’s finally able to compose herself enough to go on.  “I just realized that I haven’t laughed like that since before I was married.”

“Oh, Bella.  Were you miserable the whole time you were in California?” 

“I don’t think so.  I mean, I loved California.  I didn’t notice Eric being gone so much at first, then it was more often.  Before I realized it, he was gone for more than just days.” 

“You’re gonna get through this.  You know that, right?”

“I guess so.”

Their conversation comes to a halt when the doorbell rings.  Isabella’s heart drops into her stomach and her hands become clammy.  The thought of seeing Taylor after all these years has her feeling vulnerable.  Daniel’s already heading toward the door, so she uses the opportunity to check her face in the dining room mirror.  After all, she doesn’t want to have puffy eyes when Taylor sees her for the first time since high school. 

Grateful that at least she doesn’t have mascara running down her face, she starts picking up the breakfast mess.  Taylor wasn’t there to see her anyway, so she doesn’t need to greet him at the door.  That doesn’t stop her from wondering what he’s been up to all these years. 

The laughter from the other room tells her that yes, it was Taylor at the door.  As she hears the voices getting closer, her heart beats faster and her hands shake.  She doesn’t know how to act.  She looks down at her hands and decides to dry them off and tidy something else so she’s ready when he enters.  That’s when she sees she hasn’t taken her wedding ring off.  The way it sparkles is misleading, nothing about her life has sparkled.  It’s barely had any shine, and just like smoke and mirrors, it was all an illusion. 

The laughter gets closer and closer, and she feels the panic climb up her throat.  Frantically, she tugs at her ring to get it off.  She can’t see Taylor again after all these years with it on.   She starts to worry that it won’t come off, but just as Daniel and Taylor turn the corner to the kitchen, her ring goes flying across the room and hits Taylor in the face. 

“Oh, shit!”  Of course it would play out this way.  How better to be reunited than with the most embarrassing thing she could think of.  “I’m so sorry.” 

“What the hell hit me?”  Taylor looks around for what it was.  When his eyes land on her two-and-a-half karat wedding ring, confusion spreads across his face.  “I don’t think you should throw this thing around.  It looks a little pricey,” he says as he bends down and picks it up. 

“Sorry.”  Isabella, embarrassed, walks toward him to retrieve it, with her head down and her eyes on the floor.  When her hand touches his, he closes his fingers around hers and gives a squeeze.  A tingle runs from her hand to her core, and she visibly shivers.  When she lifts her head to see his face, the air leaves her body and she feels the room spin.  He is gorgeous, tall and lean, tanned and fit.  My, have the years been good to him. 

“Hello, Isabella.  You look great.”  Taylor is still holding her hand and doesn’t seem in a rush to let it go.

“Hi, Taylor.”  Her voice is deep and raspy.  She clears her throat and continues, “You look good, too.”  And boy does her body notice.  She can’t believe how cruel the world can be.  Life is as bad as it can get and, instead of helping her, it throws this gorgeous man at her, the one who got away. 

“Uh-hmm.”  Daniel clears his throat nice and loud and brings her back to reality. 

“Sorry.”  She pulls her hand back quickly, sending the ring back to the ground.  She and Taylor both bend to reach it and bump heads in the process. 

“Ouch . . .” she screeches. 

“Damnit, that hurt,” Taylor says while rubbing his head.  “Are you okay?”  He reaches out to touch her head, but she jerks back. 

She doesn’t want him to touch her again.  She can’t deal with the fact that her body clearly never forgot its crush on him.  “I’m fine.” 

Daniel bends down, picks up the ring, and hands it to her.   He can see that she is flustered.

“Are you hungry, Taylor?”  Daniel asks.

Taylor nods in response, but doesn’t take his eyes off of Isabella. 

“Come on, I’ll get you something.”  Daniel motions to him.

Taylor follows him the rest of the way into the kitchen, leaving Isabella there alone. 

Thankful for Daniel giving her the chance to escape, she doesn’t waste time and practically runs back to her room.  When she gets there, she throws herself on the bed, buries her head in the pillows, and allows herself to cry.  Why can’t she catch a break? 

Chapter Six

A LIGHT KNOCK at the door pulls Isabella from her pitty party.  She sits up slowly and tries to gather herself.  She’s sure her face is a mess, and knows there is no use in trying to fix it before allowing anyone inside.  “Come in,” she calls.

Slowly, the door opens.  When she sees it’s just Daniel, she lets out the breath she didn’t realize she was holding. 

“You okay, Bella?” 

“I will be, I hope.”

“I’m sorry.  Want Taylor and I to go stay at mom’s while he’s here?   I don’t want this to be any harder for you?”

“Nah.  This is your home.  Besides, I’m not sure being alone will be any better.”

“Okay.  We’ll try not to be in the way.  Taylor has to go into the city tomorrow, and he offered to just stay in a hotel tomorrow night if you’d like.” 

“That’s not necessary.  You guys have fun.  Just don’t be offended if I spend most of my time in here.”

“I won’t.  Taylor is worried, though.  Do you want me to tell him why you’re so frazzled, or just let it be?”

“You can tell him.  Not that you know it all, but you can tell him I just left Eric.”

Daniel walks over and wraps her in a hug.  “It’ll get easier, Bella dear.  I promise.”  He places a kiss on the top of her head, squeezes her one last time, and heads back out of the room.

Isabella can hear Taylor and Daniel in the other room most of the day.  She avoids eating lunch just to keep away from them.  She just can’t bear to face Taylor right now.  Not only is he perfect looking, but he was concerned about upsetting her, making him even more perfect.  What would life have been like had she married someone like that instead?  Doesn’t matter anyway, she never plans to get married again. Anything to avoid the pain she’s feeling now.

When her stomach growls, reminding her that she’s barely eaten all day, she lies back down on the bed and attempts to read a book to take her mind off her hunger.  It does for a while, and she’s able to lose herself in someone else’s problems.  Yeah, she realizes they are fictional problems, but they aren’t hers, and that’s all that matters. 

A loud crash startles her.  When she looks around, it’s pitch dark in her room and realizes she must’ve fallen asleep.  For the first time in a while though, she feels rested.  Her body obviously needed the sleep. 

Quietly, she gets up and tip toes out of her room, hoping that Taylor and Daniel are asleep for the night.  She didn’t check the time, so she has no idea how late it actually is.  As she rounds the corner into the living room, she sees Daniel and Taylor playing video games. 
Damn.  Of course I couldn’t get that lucky.
  She must have actually whispered that out loud, because both of them turn to look at her.  
Shit.

“Feel better, sleepyhead?”  Daniel teases.  “I came to tell you dinner was ready and found you zonked out.”

“Sorry.  I didn’t mean to fall asleep, it just sort of happened.” 

Taylor excuses himself and heads to the bathroom, but it’s obviously to give them a moment to talk. 

“Have you been sleeping at all?”

“Sort of.  I didn’t think it was that bad.  I do feel better, though.” 

“Good.  Want some food? Taylor and I barbecued some steak skewers and potatoes.”

Her growling stomach gives her away and she blushes.

“Perfect.  I’ll make you a plate and you can sit in here with us.  We’ll turn on a movie so you don’t have to watch us play Call of Duty.”  With a laugh, he walks out.

Taylor comes back into the room.  He must’ve heard Daniel say they’d stop playing, because he turns off the game and fumbles through the movie channels on the television.  He doesn’t say much and looks a little uncomfortable to be in the room with me.  I don’t blame him, after the spazz I was earlier. 

Isabella sits, quietly waiting for Daniel to come back with her food and relieve the tension in the air.  She doesn’t mean to be so awkward, but she was never really all that comfortable around the opposite sex.  When she met Eric, she wasn’t paying attention, or she probably would’ve made that uncomfortable too. 

After what seems like forever, Daniel pops back in with a plate full of food and a glass of wine.  As much as she loves wine, she’s a little afraid to drink in front of Taylor, afraid she’ll get too comfortable around him.  “Can I just have water please, Daniel?” 

“I’ll get you one, but I think you should have a glass of wine with your food.”  Then he whispers so that Taylor can’t hear, “Just to help you relax a little.  You are so tense.   Just one, if that’s all you want.”

“Fine.”  She’ll never win this argument, so she just gives in.  Seems to be the way she deals with everything.  Thinking about it, she knows it’s that part of her personality that allowed Eric to take advantage of her.  Every other woman in their right mind would have made a stink about him not coming home for days at a time.  She was caught up in being spoiled when he was home.  The illusion of being a princess was intoxicating, keeping her blissfully unaware of his cheating ways. 

The boys talk amongst themselves while they pick out a movie, to give her the space she needs.  Clearly, Taylor has been made aware of her situation and is trying to be understanding.  She feels a little guilty that their fun seems to be hampered by her, but it feels nice to be around people, it’s been so long since she’s really had anyone around.  Unable to enjoy herself, she finishes eating and gets up to put her plate away.  Taylor stops her though, taking it from her without a word, and pointing for her to sit back down.  The thought of someone taking care of her, if even for a moment, gives her a warm fuzzy feeling inside. 

When Taylor returns, he and Daniel pick a movie and get it started.  The room is quiet, aside from the small commentary about the movie and the boy’s laughter.  Isabella isn’t really paying attention to the movie, but having people around her settles her soul.

Before long, she feels herself being picked up and moved.  Her eyes flutter open and she sees that she’s in Taylor’s arms, and he’s carrying her down the hall.  Instead of questioning it, she just allows him to carry her to her room.  When he lays her down on the bed, she rolls over and drifts back to sleep, completely content for the first time in years.