Misty Reigenborn Romance Boxed Set (70 page)

Robyn squeezed his hand and smiled, when what she really felt like doing was holding onto his legs when he walked out the door like a child that doesn’t want a parent to leave them.  “I’ll miss you too.  When can we get together again?”

He sighed.  “I don’t know love.  I’m having a problem with my restaurant and may be out of town for at least a few days.  I’d love to take you with me, but it came up quickly and the temporary agency in this ridiculous town hardly ever has workers on hand period, let alone qualified ones.  It is certainly possible to run the bar with one bartender, but on Friday and Saturday nights you know how busy it gets.  I wasn’t thinking clearly when I gave you those days.  You’re pregnant and don’t need to be put under undue stress.  Would you like to manage my restaurant?  It’s an hour and a half away.  I own two houses up there.  You could live in whichever you chose until we’re able to be man and wife.  The pay is generous and I could train you myself.”

“I’ll think about it.  Thank you.”

“I want you to be happy with me Robyn.  If there is anything you want or need, don’t be afraid to ask.”

Robyn sighed.  “I can’t have what I really want until you’re divorced.”

“Patience my darling.  It will be worth it in the end.  Believe me, I know how you feel.  The days that I am without you, when I know that you are the woman for me, are endless.  But I have to make sure that my children will be taken care of and that my wife will not try to ruin me in the divorce.  Leslie is such a miserable woman that if she knew I was happy, she’d do anything to take that away from me, even at the cost of the wellbeing of our children.”

“That’s so sad.  I can understand being mad at your spouse or upset that your marriage didn’t end the way you’d planned, but why hurt your children?  You are hurting your children when you alienate them from a fit parent, or even say bad things about the other parent in front of them.”

“I know honey.  You are as wise, kind and loving as you are beautiful.  You know, after marrying Leslie I’ve been a little afraid of beautiful women.  Sometimes beautiful woman grow so used to taking advantage of others that they become cold hearted.  I have seen it over and over in the women that have worked for me, and it bothers me.  Or they become wounded by their beauty.  That saddens me even more because my sister was one of them.  She was so young when she passed, but she had already lived both of those lives.  She had become cold hearted.  We grew up dirt poor and she knew that she could use her beauty to take advantage of others and acquire things that our mother couldn’t give us.  Then she opened herself up to a man that she thought loved her for whom she was and not her pretty face.  She ended up mired in a world of drug addiction.  He sold her body for drugs.  I wanted to kill him when she died.  I wanted to kill my stepfather when I found out he had taken my sister’s virginity through rape, but I only beat the shit out of him.  I think that my mother hated me for it.  She didn’t call for me on her deathbed.  He was the only one that she wanted beside her, the child molester that had stolen her daughter’s innocence.  My sister’s boyfriend is in prison for the rest of his life.  I helped put him there.  My sister wasn’t the only girl whose body he was selling to feed his addiction.  Instead of beating him to a bloody pulp after he had the nerve to show his face at her funeral or taking his life, I paid a private investigator to watch him and found out that he was running a prostitution ring of underage runaways out of the motel room he’d lived in with my sister.  He paid them in drugs and they were all quickly becoming as addicted as my sister had been.”

“That is so sad.  It must have taken a lot of courage for you to do something like that.”

Gabe shrugged.  “It was the right thing to do.  I have always liked to think of myself as an honorable man.  I help others when I can and I give people second chances when they come to work for me.  Sometimes I give them way too many chances.  I certainly haven’t parted on the best terms with all of my ex-employees, but my heart was in the right place.”

“Of course it was.”  Robyn kissed him, wishing that she didn’t have to let him go, but knowing that she did all the same.  “I’d better let you get home.  Goodnight Gabe.”

“Goodnight my beautiful Robyn.  I’ll let you know when we can meet again.”

“Okay.”  She hid a sigh as she watched him walk away.

Gabe was a better man that even she had imagined, and the rumors that ran rampant about him were starting to anger her.  She believed that the people of Brunton were jealous of his money, his beautiful wife and children and the fact that women found him so attractive.  But as he had said before, they really knew nothing about his life or who he was.

She showered and then crawled into bed, tired but already missing the man that she knew she would love, married or not.

Chapter 8

It was another week and a half before Gabe could meet her again.  Robyn was sorely disappointed, but she enjoyed their time together immensely.  She had decided against managing his restaurant.  She enjoyed working at Gabe’s Place.  She enjoyed working with Neal and Kasia and Eric was funny and smart once you got around the fact that he was such a player.  She also didn’t want to live in another town and see her lover even less than she already did.

Gabe bought her more baby clothes and told her that she didn’t need to worry about buying used things.  Her sister had sent a huge box of clothes, toys and blankets and her parents had sent her a smaller box with a few outfits and a large gift certificate to a baby store that didn’t have a location in Brunton but that she could use online.  Robyn felt that she was prepared for the birth of her child clothes and furniture wise, but she worried that she wouldn’t be the mother that she wanted to be. 

She knew that she would love her child with all of her heart and she had some experience caring for children, but she was afraid that she would panic in the areas where it really counted, that she would fail and have her child looking at her the ways she sometimes looked at her own parents.  She knew that every new parent had fears, and that they were normal, but Gabe couldn’t go with her to her doctor’s appointments of course and she had heard no more from Fuller so she went to them alone.  The baby was doing well, but she felt very alone when she was poked and prodded by her doctor.  Worries seemed to plague her the most in the days that followed her checkups.

Kasia sometimes made comments to her that led her to believe that her coworker knew that she was having an affair with Gabe.  Eric made offhanded comments that made her think that he knew too, and he still claimed that Kasia was sleeping with Gabe.  Neal heard all of the gossip but seemed to take it all in stride.  He was a watcher and a listener and took everything in, only participating when he felt as if his involvement would help the situation.

Robyn still felt her attraction to him.  Sometimes it pulled at her so much that she wished he were her lover instead of Gabe.  But other than a comment about her beauty here and there and his overall kindness towards her, Neal did not show any sign that he returned her affections.  She felt guilty when she had dirty thoughts about Neal too, because she had told Gabe that she loved him.

He was so happy, and stayed with her all night that night since his wife and kids were out of town.  She only brought up the subject of divorce when she felt that it wouldn’t spoil their time together.  But the things he told her seemed more and more to be excuses to her.  With as much as she tried to put it out of her mind as the days passed, Robyn worried that she was fooling herself about her relationship with Gabe.  Her heart hurt as often as it soared when she was in Gabe’s arms and could pretend that he was hers alone.

Chapter 9

Winter began.  Robyn was looking forward to the birth of her child as her belly expanded.  She was sure by the pictures that had been taken of her baby during ultrasound that she was having a girl.  She would have loved her child just as much regardless of sex, but she thought it was nice to think of being able to dress her daughter in even cuter clothes than were made for little boys.  She was extra careful when she drove and tried to avoid any icy patches when she walked anywhere.

She was working with Neal one night.  No matter her feelings for him or her feelings for Gabe, her nights working with Neal had quickly become her favorite nights of the week.  Kasia was sometimes too blunt and flirtatious for her tastes.  Eric was still annoying when she let him get to her, which luckily wasn’t often.

The bar was dead that night and it didn’t take a genius to figure out why Robyn thought.  The weather had gotten bad.  She could see the snow coming down hard when she looked out the side window of the bar.

Robyn sighed as she crossed the bar to where Neal was sitting, doing a crossword puzzle.  The only two customers in the bar weren’t even interested in talking to Neal, and that was unusual, she thought.

He looked up at her and she couldn’t help but think how beautiful his eyes were.  They were a strange mixture of brown, gray and blue.  His eye color changed with what he wearing.  Tonight, since he was wearing a dark blue shirt, they looked blue.  She didn’t think she’d seen a more beautiful pair of eyes.  Even Gabe’s, that always made her feel like she could fall right into them, didn’t match Neal’s.

“Hey Robyn.  Is everything okay?  How’s the baby?”

“She’s good.  I’m okay.  Just bored I guess.  Do you think we should call Gabe, see if he wants us to close down early?”

Neal shook his head.  “Gabe always calls when he wants us to close early.  If he’s not here, he told me not to bother him, because I’m not a woman I guess.”

“Yeah.” 

Robyn wondered then if Neal knew about her relationship with Gabe.  She felt really stupid for loving him sometimes, especially since he’d promised her that he’d leave his wife the first time they’d slept together and still hadn’t done it, but she knew that Gabe would be a really good father for her baby.  And her baby deserved a good father, she thought.

She felt her earlier crush on Neal sneak back up on her as he stood up and stretched.  His shirt wasn’t tucked into his jeans and it rode up, showing her his toned abdomen.  She couldn’t help but wonder what it would feel like under her hands.  Then she told herself to shut up in her head, figuring that it was her overactive pregnancy hormones catching up to her.  She’d heard that sometimes women got really horny in their second and third trimesters and she was certainly feeling it.

Neal motioned for her to sit down in the chair.  “Sit.  I’m sorry.  I wasn’t thinking about it earlier.  I forget sometimes that you’re pregnant, because you don’t look like it.”

Robyn hid a smile.  “Thanks.”

“No, really.  Not that it’s bad to look pregnant, but if anything, I think you’re even more beautiful than you were the day I met you.”

If Robyn didn’t know better, she’d have thought that Neal was flirting with her.  He was so serious most of the time, but when he chose to show his sense of humor, he could make almost anyone laugh.  She felt like she’d pined over him for so long before she gave up and went after Gabe, though it had really only been a month, she thought, which meant she’d been sleeping with Gabe for two months now and there were still no divorce papers.

Robyn sighed again. 

“I’m sorry,” Neal said.  “I didn’t mean to offend you.”

She laughed.  “You didn’t offend me.  Thank you for saying that I’m beautiful.  For the record, I think you’re gorgeous.  But I bet that girls tell you that all the time, huh?”

“Yeah, I guess.”  He ran a hand over his dark hair.

She wondered what he’d look like if he let it grow out a little.  “Neal, can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

One of their customers had gotten up to leave, without leaving any kind of a tip.  When he opened the door, the wind almost blew it shut.  He cursed and pushed his way out into the blustery night.

“Do you ever wonder if you’re making the right choices in your life?”

“Sometimes, sure.  I guess everybody does.  Why do you ask?”

“Well, I picked the complete wrong man to have a baby with.  It wasn’t like I did it on purpose, but to him, it seemed like I did.  I wanted a baby, but I could have waited until he was ready.  I wonder now though, if Fuller would ever really have been ready.”

“I don’t know if anyone is ever really ready to be a parent.  People might think they are, but who’s really ready to cope with a baby with pneumonia or a screaming two year old?”

“Um.”

“I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean it like that Robyn.  You are going to be a really good mother.  I just think that sometimes people think they have all the answers when it comes to kids and no one ever really does.  No one really knows how they’ll react when something bad happens to their kid until it does. No one really knows how they’ll deal with a rebellious teenager or a suicidal preteen.  It’s a crazy world.  I’ve known people that aren’t allowed to see their kids or have had their parental rights terminated by the court for really stupid reasons.  I’ve known people who should probably never see their kids again and still have custody.  I looked into my daughter’s eyes and told her that I would protect her from anything.  Then her mother took off with a known sex offender two days later.  I haven’t seen her since.”

“I am so sorry Neal.  I never knew.”

Neal didn’t answer her for a minute, because their last customer got up, pushing his empty glass and a few dollars tip across the bar to them. 

“Goodnight Marc.  Be safe out there.”

“Call your boss and tell him you want to go home.”  Marc chuckled.

“I’m sure he’ll be in or call before too long.  Tell Barb I said hi.”

“I will.  When are you going to get over yourself and ask my daughter out Neal?  Trudy thinks she’s in love with you.”

Neal laughed.  “I’m too old for her.  She just turned twenty-one didn’t she?”

“Yep, and she’s been mooning over you since the first time she walked in this place.  I’m just giving you shit Neal.  You have a good night.  Nice to see you Robyn.  I always seem to miss you when I come in here lately.”

“Nice to see you too, Marc.  Drive safely.”

Marc tipped his hat at them and then walked out into the night.

Neal pulled himself up and sat on the surface of the bar, not looking at her.

“I’m sorry Neal,” she repeated.

“I didn’t mean to lay all that on you Robyn.  I’m sorry.  My failings as a father are probably the last thing you need to hear about while you’re pregnant.”

“I’d like to hear about your daughter, I mean, if you don’t mind.”

“Um, okay.  Her name is Ashlyn, and she’s seven now.  I met her mom when I was a senior in high school.  I used to think she was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen, until I got to know her.  I know that sounds bad, but it’s true.  Tress was a bitch.  She was so mean that she was downright cruel.  There was this girl at our school, she was really shy and she was a few pounds overweight.  She really liked this guy and everyone knew it.  He was on the outskirts of being popular, not in the real in crowd, but nowhere close to being a nerd or an outcast either.  It turned
out he was secretly going out with this girl, I think her name was Mandy.  She was starting to feel better about herself.  But then Tress found out they were hooked up.  So she gives the guy, I can’t remember his name anymore, a blowjob so that he’ll screw this girl and dump her.  This was while we were going out too.  Mandy was so upset that she tried to kill herself.  He felt really bad afterwards because he really did care about her, but it didn’t matter by that point.  Mandy withdrew back into her shell and was never the same afterwards.  I heard they had to institutionalize her after a while.  And all because Tress couldn’t stand the thought of two people she barely knew going out.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah.   I should have broken up with her at that point.  But she always had me so tightly wrapped around her finger that it was pathetic.  We were together for four years.  I asked her to marry me hundreds of times but she always said no.  She used to tell me that I wasn’t good enough for her, that she was ashamed to have my child.  And I took it.  I took every damned bit of it.  She used to beat the shit out of me when she was drunk.  I always let her because I was too embarrassed to tell anyone.  And it’s not like I could hit her back.  Believe me, there were plenty of times when I wanted to, too.  I should have taken Ashlyn and left.  She used to say horrible things to our daughter, tell her she was stupid and ugly.  Ash would cry for hours.  I was actually talking to a lawyer about getting custody when she left.  I couldn’t take it anymore.  I couldn’t put my daughter through that shit anymore.  Then, I came home from work one night, and she was gone and so was Ash.  She used to tell me that if she ever left, she wouldn’t bother taking Ashlyn with her because she hated her since she was mine.  Our neighbor only bothered to tell me that she’d been screwing a known sex offender while our daughter was in the house after she’d already left.  I wanted to kill her when I found out.”

“I am so sorry Neal.”

“Yeah, me too.”

“You haven’t been able to find her?”

“No.  It’s been four years and I’ve tried everything I can think of to find my baby girl.  I can’t stand the thought of the life that she must be living.  It makes me feel so helpless, like the world’s worst father.  I failed my child in the worst way possible.”

“Oh Neal.  You didn’t fail her.  Tress was the one that failed her.  If she was any kind of a mother, she would have left Ashlyn with you.  I’m sure you were a wonderful father.”

He sighed.  “Someday I’ll find my baby.  I just hope that too much damage won’t have been done before I do.”

“I’m sure that once you’ve got her back you’ll be able to heal whatever her mother has done to her with your love.”

She suddenly wanted very much to kiss him.  He looked like he wanted to kiss her, too, Robyn thought.  He moved toward her, but then the door suddenly burst open and Gabe walked in.

Normally, she’d be glad to see him.  Tonight she wasn’t though.  She looked at Neal, who looked away from her, seemingly embarrassed.

“Time to go home guys.  You’ll both be paid for the full shift.  If you want to head out Robyn, I can help Neal clean up.”

She knew that Gabe would probably end up at her house, but she thought that she’d much rather stay and help Neal clean up.  He’d opened up to her, and she wanted to talk to him more, learn more about him.  She wanted to help ease some of his pain, she realized.

Gabe gave her a look.  She bit back a sigh.  “Thank you Gabe.  Goodbye Neal.  I’ll see you next week.”

“Bye Robyn.  Drive safely.”

“You too.  I mean, when you get out of here.”

She felt very lame, and walked out of the bar without looking at either of them.

Gabe showed up at her house half an hour later and let himself in with his key.  He kissed her mouth and then raised her shirt to kiss her belly.  “How are my two favorite girls doing tonight?”

She bit back a snide remark about the fact that he had a wife and a daughter, wondering why she was so annoyed by his presence.  “We’re fine.”

“Just fine?  Did something happen between you and Neal tonight?  He seemed almost upset when you left.”

“Nothing happened between me and Neal Gabe.”

“Good.  I wouldn’t want to have to fire him.”

“Gabe come on.  You can’t fire Neal.  He probably needs the money to help find his daughter.”

Once she’d opened her mouth, she knew she should have kept it shut.  She shouldn’t have shared Neal’s secret she thought, and it seemed to piss Gabe off very much that she had.

“So he told you his sob story about his daughter, did he?  I’m surprised.  From what I understand, I was the only one at the bar that he told about it, one of the few people in town actually.  He moved here because the private investigator he hired told him that Tress had lived her when she was a small child and had brought Ashlyn here for a while.  Of course by the time he got here she was already long gone.”

“It’s so sad.  The whole thing is.”

“It’s pathetic is what it is.  He let her lead him around by the balls for years and then he let her take off with some piece of shit child molester and take his daughter with her.  I offered to pay for a better investigator when he first told me, but he refused.  I could have gotten his daughter back for him in weeks, if not days.  But no, his stubborn pride stopped him.  His stubborn pride is what got his daughter into this mess in the first place.”

She reached out and touched Gabe’s face.  “I don’t think it was like that Gabe.  I think he loved Tress very much and didn’t want to take their daughter away from her.  It wasn’t his fault that she left with some pervert.”

“I don’t want to talk about this crap anymore Robyn.  It disgusts me to even think about it.  Let’s make love.  I have to go back home tonight.  My daughter is sick and wants only Daddy to take care of her.”