Mixed Messages (A Malone Mystery) (41 page)

She leaned back with her eyes closed
.
I can’t think about all that now. I
have to calm down, she told herself
.
The kids will be home soon
.
I’ve
got a lot to do
.
Take a deep breath
.
Focus
!
What do
I
have to do
?
As she exhaled, she counted on her fingers as she said aloud, “
I
have to iron the kids’ costumes as soon as they get home
.
I
know they’ll be wrinkled after today
.
I
have to make dinner and
I
have to get the candy ready for tonight
.
” I haven’t even checked today’s mail, she realized.

She willed herself to get up from the sofa
and
went out into the hallway
. She
retrieved her stack of mail from the table
, shuffling through the envelopes and postcards as she walked
into her apartment
.
The last piece of mail in the stack was a plain, white envelope with her name typed on the front. Her hands shook as she tore open the envelope and read,
“
For the wages of sin is death. Romans, 6:23.”

“Oh, my God!” she exclaimed. Shaking, she balled the paper up in her fist and shoved it
into her coat pocket
.
“It’s just another prank
.
Get busy
!
Don’t think
!
Get busy
!
Don’t think
!”
she told herself
.
She
went over
to the hall closet, hung up her coat and pulled out her ironing board
.
She carried it into the living room and set it up in a corner against the wall
.
Then she
went
back to the closet to get her iron, setting it on top of the ironing board
.
As she walked down the hallway toward her bedroom, intending to change her clothes, she heard the kitchen door slam and the sound of Danielle’s voice.

“You’re not supposed to slam the door, you doofus!”

“I’m in here, kids,”
she yelled.

Davey burst into the room, climbed up onto Ann’s bed and began jumping up and down
.
“Look Mommy,” he said
.
“I’m in the circus
!
This is my trampoline.”

“Davey Kern, you get down from there right now,” Ann scolded him
.
“You’re gonna break your neck.”

“But Mommy
… .
”

“Right now!”

Davey
flopped
down
on the bed and started wiggling back and forth, pulling the covers with him
.

Ann stood at the foot of the bed, watching him. “What’s gotten into you, young man?” she
asked
.
As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she realized what was causing her son’s hyperactivity
.
“How much candy did you have in school today?”

Davey stopped moving and looked up at her, his eyes wide and a big grin on his face
.
“I
didn’t have
any
candy today. We had our Halloween party and I had cupcakes and ice cream and
punch but no candy
.
It was so good,” he said, patting his tummy.

“Well, I think a little fresh air would do you good
.
Change your clothes and go play in the backyard for a little while
.
You need to use up some of this energy
.
Dani
!
”
she
called
.

“Hi, Mom,” Danielle said
.

Ann
turned around
, surprised to see
that
her daughter
was standing right behind her.

“Honey, would you do me a favor
?
Would you please go outside with Davey for a little while
?
I’ve got some things I need to do.”

“Do I have to
?”

“Yes
.
Just for a little while
.
Please.”

“Oh
,
okay
,” Danielle moaned
.
“I’ll go change
.
You get ready, you little twerp,” she said to her brother
.
“Fifteen minutes, Mom, that’s it
.
I
have things to do too.”

Ann couldn’t help but smile to herself as she went into the kitchen, retrieved the kids’ costumes from their backpacks and carried them into the living room
.
Danielle was growing up so fast
.
She
does
stand up for herself
,
she
thought. No one will ever walk all over her.
I was so concerned that I was showing her a bad example by
not standing up
to her
father when I know he’s wrong.
Maybe
I don’t have to worry
about that
after all
.
Good. One less thing
.

She
plugged in the iron and turned it on
.
As
she was about to start ironing, the
doorbell rang
.
“Now what?” she muttered, as she headed for the door
.
She paused to glance in the oval mirror
that hung
on the wall
near the door
.
She grimaced as she looked at her reflection
.
Tucking a stray strand of her hair behind one ear and shrugging her shoulders, she looked out the
peephole
.
Dr.
Susan Thatcher
was standing there.
She
opened the door.

“Hi, Ann,”
she
said,
smiling
. “I hope this isn’t too inconvenient of a
time.”

Ann thought about all the things that she still had to do but she didn’t have the heart to refuse the doctor
.
After all, she remembered,
I
told her on the phone that
she could
stop by.
It
sounded as if
she
really want
s
to help
me
and
I definitely need all the help I can get right now. She must consider what she has
to say
to me to be
important
because
doctors don’t make house calls anymore and
she’s
made a special trip just to see
me
.
She motioned for
her
to come in
.
“
Dr. Thatcher,
I’m afraid I don’t have much time,” she said.

“I know
.
This will only take a few minutes, I promise.
And, please, call me ‘Susan
.
’
”

Ann
led
her
into
the
living room and the two women took seats on the sofa, turning to face one another
.
“I’m sorry the place is such a mess,”
she
said
.
“Things have been a bit hectic lately.”

“I know they have
.
That’s why I’m here
.
As I said on the phone, I owe you an apology
.
I was out of line when you came to see me the other day
.
I won’t go into the reasons, excuses, right now
.
The bottom line is that I put the responsibility for your marriage problems on you and I was wrong to do that
.
From everything you’ve told me, I believe your husband is an alcoholic.”

Ann
stared
at
her
, her mouth open
.
“
I know he drinks too much but h
e drinks because he’s not happy,” she said, looking down at her hands
.
“I don’t make him happy anymore, I guess
.
I try to
.
I try to be a good wife but I always fall short
.
I always do something wrong
.
If I could just do better, maybe he’d stay home
.
Maybe he wouldn’t have to drink.”

“Oh, Ann
!
There’s so much I need to tell you,” Susan said, patting Ann’s hand. “The
first thing you need to know is that alcoholism is a disease and it affects the people who love an
alcoholic. You didn’t cause it, you can’t control it and you can’t cure it. I know that’s a lot to
take in and I know you have no reason to but, please, trust me.”

“I can’t
.
I mean, a
disease
?
How
?
Why?”

“I know you have lots of questions
.
I brought you some pamphlets from Alanon,” Susan said, reaching into her briefcase
.
“Alanon is for families and friends of alcoholics
.
They have meetings and
… .
”

“But why should
I
go to meetings,” Ann interrupted, “if I’m not the one with the problem
?”

“
As I said,
I know this is a lot to take in at one time,” Susan said, “but
… .
”

“Will they at least tell me how to stop David from drinking?”

Susan smiled
.
“No, Ann
.
They won’t
.
Alanon is for you
.
Again, I know that’s hard to grasp right now but I promise you, if you’ll go to some meetings,
if you’ll make a commitment to yourself to do that,
things will become clear
.
And,” she added, “you’ll feel so much better.”

Ann glanced up at the clock above the fireplace
.
“I’m
so
sorry
.
I don’t mean to be rude but
I
… .
”

“I know
.
You have
things to do and you need
me
to leave
.
”
Susan reached over and hugged Ann
.
“Promise me, you’ll read these,” she said, setting the pamphlets on the coffee table
.
“I’ll call you tomorrow and we’ll get together when you have more time
.
Will you promise me
?”

Ann hesitated for just a second
.
“Yes,” she said
.
“I promise.”

When
she
opened the door
to let Susan out
, Lawrence was walking out the front door with a suitcase in his hand
.
She
got a glimpse of a taxicab in the driveway
.

He
turned toward her and smiled
.
“Well
,
I’m off
to Chicago
now
.
Have a Happy Halloween and I’ll see you in a couple of days.”

She smiled back. “Happy Halloween to you too, Lawrence. Have a good time at your
convention.
”

A tear slid down
her
cheek as she watched Susan follow Lawrence out
.
Well, my first impression of her sure was wrong, she thought
.
She
really does seem to care about me
.
She
didn’t understand all that the therapist had said but, as she headed for the kitchen to throw together a quick dinner, she breathed a sigh of relief
.
Maybe, she thought, there is hope after all.