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Chapter

Thirty-Six

Drake

I’m sitting waiting at the café where Rachel agreed to meet me. I’m nursing a flat white and looking out of the window. Finally, ten minutes late, she appears in the doorway. She makes her way over to the counter, grabs a coffee, and finds the booth where I’m sat.

“Sorry I’m late. Traffic was awful on the way to Mom’s.”

“That’s okay, you’re here now.”

I look at Rachel and wonder what she could want from me. I don’t really know her very well. We had a one-night stand nearly nine years ago, which resulted in her getting pregnant with Morgana. Except for paying her child maintenance, I don’t have anything else to do with her, and even that is done through the Child Support Agency, so I have no contact with her at all.

“I guess I should get right to the point, no sense in beating around the bush,” she said. She spoke into her cup instead of looking at me.

When she lifts her eyes to mine, I see unshed tears in them. That makes me even more nervous.

“Take your time, we have as much time as you need.”

Trying to placate her makes the tears fall down her cheeks. I feel sorry for her. I hate seeing women cry.

“I’m really sorry for keeping you from your daughter, Drake.”

Wow, that was definitely not what I expected her to say. I don’t know what I was expecting, exactly, but it wasn’t that.

“I was wrong before. I should’ve let you into Morgana’s life. At least then she’d know who her dad is.”

Her words were rushed and made her tears flow faster. I offered her a napkin from the table to dry her eyes. She took it and dabbed her face, but it was futile because more tears replaced the old ones.

“I was wrong in the past, I should have let you be there for her. My only excuse is I was in a new relationship and I thought he was going to adopt her and we’d be a happy family. But now he’s gone and I’ve had to tell her he wasn’t her real dad. He’s not the person I thought he was. I thought he’d treat her the same way he treats our son, but now that he’s gone, he doesn’t bother to see her,” she said softly.

“It would have been confusing for her when she was so young to have two dads, I guess.”

I felt awful for Rachel. I could tell she was struggling. I should have contacted her nine months ago. That way, maybe I could have got to know my daughter sooner. But there had been no way of me knowing what she wanted. Not that that is a good excuse, but it’s all I have.

“Why didn’t you respond to my message months ago, Drake?” Rachel asked, looking directly at me, her tears abated for the time being.

“I was in rehab, Rachel. I’m a recovering alcoholic.”

It would be stupid not to tell her the truth, so I’d made it as plain as I could.

“Oh.”

She sighed softly and took a sip of her coffee.

“I was in a really bad place. I got arrested for drink driving. Not that I’m irresponsible. It happened because I had one too many JD and Cokes and thought I was okay to drive. But I was pulled over for a busted tail-light and the officer could smell the whiskey on my breath. I only just failed the breathalyser and I was lucky I only received a fine and a twelve month driving ban. It made me see what I had slowly been doing for a long time. I had been using alcohol as a crutch. So I signed myself into a rehabilitation centre to get dry.”

“That is pretty irresponsible, but I’m not here to judge you. Though I don’t want my daughter to grow up with a dad that searches for answers at the bottom of a bottle.”

I pull my wallet from my pocket and take out the nine month chip I got recently. I push it across the table to her and she picks it up. She studies it, then flips it over.

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference,” I recite quietly so that only she can hear.

“This is for nine months sober?”

“It is. I’ve not even thought about touching a drop since I went through rehab. Honestly, I’m sober now and I never want that to change.”

“Morgana needs her father,” Rachel mutters quietly, so quietly it seems she’s talking to herself more than me.

“I’m in a good place in my life right now, Rachel. I can promise you that I won’t let her down. I know you’re worried, but I had to tell you the truth. You have to see that. I couldn’t keep it from you, it wouldn’t be right.”

“Would you like to meet her and take it from there? There’s still time for you to get to know each other. You know what they say, better late than never. She doesn’t have much else in the way of family. My mom is too old to care for her for more than a few hours. I don’t have any other family. No siblings, and my dad has never been around.”

“I’d love to meet her. We can take it as slowly as you like.”

My heart is fluttering in my chest. I’m finally getting to meet my daughter. My life couldn’t be better right now. I’m sober, my wife and I have everything on track, we’re expecting a new baby, and now I get to see Morgana. What more could a guy want? My family will be so pleased for me. They might even get to meet her themselves if Rachel allows it. I can’t wait to tell Anna. I hope she takes it okay. It’s a pretty big bombshell. Still, I can’t help but be happy and I am sure Anna will be too. Ayden and the new baby will have another sibling. I know I can’t rush things too fast, but it will all come together eventually. I hope.

“That would be nice,” Rachel finally replies as she nurses what must now be a cold coffee.

“I’ll go completely at your pace, Rachel. I don’t have to meet her straightaway. Does she know anything about me?”

“She knows that my ex isn’t her dad. I told her that you’re her real dad and when she asked why she hadn’t met you, I was truthful with her and said it was because I had been silly and not allowed you to see her.”

I wondered why her ex never adopted Morgana, but it’s not my place to ask.

We talked for a while longer before she had to go and fetch Morgana. She told me all sorts of things about Morgana, like what she liked to do, what she liked to eat, and about her schooling. I saw photos on Rachel’s phone and came to realise that my daughter was beautiful and should be cherished. I should have made contact months ago, but more than that, I should have tried harder to see her from when she was born.

I walked Rachel to her car and then went back to the café to grab a coffee to take out. I also picked up one of Anna’s favourite pastries and a cake for Ayden to eat when he got home from school. I called a taxi and stood on the street to wait for it.

The taxi pulled up and I walked around the back of it to reach the passenger door. There was an almighty noise, more deafening than anything I’ve ever heard. In the next moment, everything was pitch black.

***

Waking what felt like an eternity later, my vision was impaired by blurriness, and I hurt like an elephant was sat on me. There was a cacophony of noises all around me, but I was having trouble hearing them. People were talking, sirens became louder, but it felt like it was all at a distance.

“Can you…sir?”

I blinked and tried to focus on someone who was in front of me. They were trying to talk to me, but my hearing kept coming and going.

“Sir, I asked…”

I tried to shake my head to do something to clear my hearing, but my head hurt too much to move. I tried moving other parts of my body but felt weighted down.

“…stay still…are coming…”

Frustrated, I tried to answer this person back but my voice came out quiet and gravelly.

“What…happened?”

It felt like I was on fire. Every breath I took hurt my body. Every attempt at movement was futile.

“You’re trapped, sir…coming…will help…”

Damn it, I still couldn’t hear properly. What could have happened?

“Anna,” I ground out.

“Who’s Anna, sir?”

Finally I’d heard something useful. “My…wife…I…need…I need to call her.”

“Do you have a phone, sir?”

“In…my…in my jeans pocket…”

All I can think of is Anna. Someone said something about being trapped. I didn’t know what that meant until I managed to move my head slightly. What I saw left me stunned.

I’m pinned under a car. It must have crashed into my taxi, taking me underneath it as it collided.

I feel the person reach for my pocket, it’s a tight squeeze between me and the car, but she manages to wiggle my phone free. I see her scroll through my contacts list and then she puts the phone to her ear.

“Hello, is that Anna?”

I don’t hear the response, but she’s obviously got through because she begins to explain the situation.

“I’m sorry to tell you this, but there’s been an accident, Anna…yes, it’s your husband…yes, if you could get here as soon as possible…”

She goes on to tell her where we are but doesn’t tell her the extent of the problem.

Chapter

Thirty-Seven

Annalise

My heart was racing. Drake had been in an accident and I didn’t know what happened to him. They didn’t tell me to go to hospital, the address the woman gave me was right by the café where Drake was meeting Rachel.

I got Ayden to grab his coat and shoes, then dropped him off with Meghan on the way. I told her it was an emergency, but I didn’t want to worry her unless utterly necessary. I felt bad for taking the extra time to drop him off, but he couldn’t be there with me.

Arriving at the scene, my heart plummeted into my shoes. All I could see was that a car had crashed into the side of a taxi. Drake must have been getting a taxi home, but how badly was he hurt? What had happened to him?

Getting out of my car and walking over to the scene, my heart shattered into a million tiny pieces. I could see Drake pinned underneath the car. All of a sudden, I heard this high pitched scream. It wasn’t until a hand landed on my shoulder and someone tried to calm me, that I realised the scream had been my own.

“Anna, my name’s Claire. I’ve been sitting with your husband since the accident. We spoke on the phone, remember?”

She walked me over to where Drake lay and the tears streamed uncontrollably down my face. I wiped furiously at them so Drake didn’t see, then sat beside him to hold his hand while the firemen sought to move the car that was pinning him in place.

“Anna.”

His voice was harsh and gravelly. He coughed and I saw the pain etched onto his handsome features.

“Drake, baby, I’m here.”

I squeezed his hand gently.

“I…I’m sorry…” Another coughing fit stopped him finishing his sentence.

“Don’t be silly, you’ve done nothing wrong. Try not to talk, you need to save your strength.”

He squeezed my hand and stroked the back of it gently with his thumb.

I couldn’t fight the tears that fell as I watched the paramedics and firemen at work around us.

Wanting to take his mind off what was going on, I moved so that Drake could put his hand on my stomach.

“Think about what’s going to happen when we get home. Think about the baby, and Ayden.”

I didn’t know what to say to him. I wasn’t sure how much longer it was going to take to remedy the situation, but my heart hurt with every breath Drake took, every cough that racked his body. He tried to talk but I kept telling him to conserve his energy, he’d need it for later.

The firemen and paramedics worked as fast as they could around us and Claire did all she could to reassure us. I tried my hardest to hold back the tears, but seeing the agony marring Drake’s features made it hard not to let them flow freely down my cheeks.

I talked to Drake about possible names for the baby, about how Ayden was doing at school, anything to take his mind off the situation. He managed to tell me Rachel said he could see Morgana, so I talked to him about all of the things he could do with her once he was better.

A short time later, the firemen managed to remove the car that was pinning Drake in place and then chaos ensued. The paramedics saw blood, lots of blood, and they rushed to Drake’s aid.

Unfortunately, it became apparent that there was nothing they could do. He was bleeding out too fast. Claire told me that it was something they had failed to spot due to the positioning of the car. I couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. I held Drake’s head in my lap and whispered soothing words to him as he quietly slipped away.

***

Later in the hospital, I called Lynne, Meghan, and Jack. They made their way to meet me and it was plain for all to see that each one of them was heartbroken but were trying to keep themselves together for Ayden’s sake. Meghan had brought Ayden but she hadn’t told him what had happened. When I sat him down and explained, his little heart broke. I knew exactly how he felt, we’d only just got Drake back and to lose him now was…well, there wasn’t really a word for it.

***

Sitting in Lynne’s living room later that night, none of us knew what to do with ourselves. I’d wanted to stay at the hospital just because I didn’t want Drake to be alone, but Lynne had taken me aside and told me there was nothing we could do now and we should just go home. Nobody wanted to go back to their own homes so the decision had been made to stay at Lynne’s, all of us together.

We talked about Drake, shared memories, laughed about the good times and tried to celebrate the life he’d had, not mourn his death. It was extremely hard for all of us, but we kept it going for each other’s sakes.

I sat in my room later that night with my hand on my stomach, talking to the baby about his or her daddy. I said what a wonderful man he was and that it was tragic he had been taken from us so soon.

Nobody deserved to die young. Drake was only forty. He was such a wonderful man and now our son or daughter would never get to meet him. Planning his funeral instead of planning the birth of the baby together was going to be the hardest thing I’d ever had to do. The one thing that kept me going was that although we’d spent those six months apart, he’d come back to me because he’d figured out that he wanted me more.