Movie Shoes (3 page)

Will You? Won’t You?

Talk went on all the evening. First of all, there was a terrific argument with Peaseblossom about spending her legacy on the family’s fares to the United States. But it did not matter what John and Bee said; Peaseblossom had made up her mind. All her life she had wanted to travel. Up to that Wednesday in September it had been just dim wanting, but with the coming of the letter with the news of her legacy, she became like someone dying of thirst who sees water; nothing and nobody was going to stop her from having what she wanted. To every argument John and Bee put forward she had answers. Why should she save the money? What for? Why shouldn’t she spend it on the family? What fun would it be traveling alone? Besides, if she went anywhere alone, she would have to live in hotels, which would cost as much and more than all their fares put together, whereas staying with Aunt Cora, she would be living free. Yes, of course, she would be expected to work for her board and lodging, but who supposed she wanted to be idle a whole winter? Had anybody ever heard of her ever wanting to be idle? All right, if they must be so businesslike, the money spent on the family could be called a loan.

Rachel sat on a stool, hugging her knees and trying to look cheerful. It seemed to her that nobody was aware her career was at stake. Here she was, one of six picked to dance in a big London theater, and her fairly bursting with pride, was discussing whisking her off to the other end of the world. The firmer Peaseblossom’s arguments grew, the more miserable Rachel became and the more difficult she found it to look cheerful. Her lips kept dropping at the corners and had to be forced upward again. Toward the end of the argument, when it was clear Peaseblossom was winning, an enormous lump kept coming into her throat.

Just before suppertime Bee looked at John. She tried not to sound too pleased, eager and excited, but she did not succeed very well. She had not let John know how worried she had been since his accident, but she had been pretty desperate. Now it was as if a fairy had appeared and given her a wish and made it come true.

“Well, John, we seem to have produced every argument we can. If Peaseblossom really wants to spend her money like that, I think we ought to let her.”

John was beginning to get a little excited. Not gaily excited, as he used to be so easily before the accident, but more as if the fog of depression which covered him most days had been blown on by a wind and was less dense.

“Let’s accept for the moment that we’re using Peaseblossom’s money. What are we going to do about the children? There’s this offer of Jeremy Caulder’s; ought we to let Tim miss this chance?”

Rachel had to turn her head so that nobody should see her wipe her eyes. Tim indeed! The only thing that had happened to Tim was that somebody important had offered to give him lessons, while she had a professional engagement. Oh, it was too mean!

Tim had been playing an imaginary grand piano through most of the Peaseblossom argument. When the conversation turned to him, he took his hands off his imaginary keyboard and got up. He sat on the arm of John’s chair.

“That’ll be all right, Dad.”

John put an arm around him. “That’s what you say now, hut what are going to say to me in ten years’ time about the opportunity I’m letting you miss?”

Rachel had to turn her face away again and sweep some more tears out of her eyes. Opportunity Tim was missing! What about the opportunity she was missing?

Tim said, “I shan’t miss any opportunity. Mr. Brown told me he didn’t suppose Mr. Caulder would be in London much for a bit. Somebody in America can give me lessons while I’m there.”

John gave him a friendly shake. “Don’t you be smug, young man. Why should any American pianist want to be bothered with a little boy who’s going to be his pupil for only a few months?”

“And who would pay for the lessons even if we could find someone to teach you?” Bee broke in. “Peaseblossom’s money will mostly be used up, and we can’t expect Aunt Cora to do more than keep us.”

Tim refused to worry. “Mr. Brown won’t mind as long as I practice every day.”

Bee had suddenly seen Rachel’s face. “Oh, my goodness, she thought, “how mean of us all, forgetting Rachel’s great chance. But she mustn’t let her father see how disappointed she is, or he may refuse to go because of her.” She got up and went over to Rachel. She knelt by her and put her arms around her in such a way that Rachel’s face was against her shoulder and so hidden from everybody. Before she spoke, she whispered, “Be brave, darling. Don’t let Dad see how much you mind.” Out loud she said, “We’ve forgotten our ballerina. Will you mind not dancing in this show and missing your lessons for six months?”

Answering was the most difficult thing Rachel had ever done. Bee’s being so nice had broken her control, and she was really crying; but somehow she managed a fairly nonwobblish voice and said the only thing she could think of: “Foreign travel broadens the mind.”

Peaseblossom gave a quick look at what she could see of Rachel and broke in hurriedly. “Quite right, and a broadened mind helps all art. We’ll bring back better pupils for Madame Fidolia and Mr. Caulder. Now that everything’s settled, I’ll get supper. Jane, it’s your night to help.”

Jane had been sitting in a corner. She had Chewing-gum on the piece of sheet he had to sit on when his toilet was done. She had combed him and brushed him until he shone like silk; then she had lain down beside him and listened with half an ear to the arguments. When first Tim and then Rachel came into the discussion, she sat up. She hugged Chewing-gum against her. There they went as usual, talking, talking, talking about Rachel and Tim; nobody seemed to care what happened to her. Peaseblossom’s saying “everything’s settled” was the last straw. Jane’s voice was shrill with anger.

“I suppose it doesn’t interest anybody if Chewing-gum and I don’t want to go to America.”

The three grown-ups laughed. Bee said, “I’m afraid not darling. It’ll be good for you.”’

Tim turned to his father. “Can Chewing-gum come? A boy at school’s poodle couldn’t go to Paris because he’d have been in quarantine when he came home.”

Bee caught her breath. Of course, Chewing-gum couldn’t go. She hadn’t thought of that. Oh, dear, surely Jane would not be difficult! She could not leave Rachel, who was crying quite badly, so she held out a hand to Jane.

“We ‘ll fix something very nice for Chewing-gum, but he can’t come because it’s the law that he must go into quarantine for six months when we get back, and he’d hate that, poor boy.”

Jane was appalled. No Chewing-gum! How could she go away and leave Chewing-gum? She got up and came into the middle of the room. She raged at them all.

“You can all go to America if you like, but I’m staying here. None of you seems to care what happens to Chewing-gum, but I do. Poor angel, you’d let him die in the snow and starve to death. All this talk about Rachel’s dancing and Tim’s piano, and nobody cares that they’re taking from me the only friend I ever had, the only person who really and truly loves me. Well, you can’t do it; I won’t go to America. I’ll chain myself and Chewing-gum to something so you can’t get us away. You’re beasts, all of you, to have thought of trying to do it. Beasts! Beasts! Beasts!”

Jane was wound up. She had lots more to say, but Peaseblossom felt they had heard more than enough. She went over to Jane and shook her. She raised her voice so it could be heard above Jane’s.

“That’s quite enough. California or no California, we mustn’t get slack or let discipline slip. It’s your night to help with supper.”

Preparations

Once it was certain they were going to California, the days seemed to rush by. From the Wednesday when it was decided they would go to the day they were to sail was really a fortnight, but to the children it did not feel a bit like fourteen days. To Bee and Peaseblossom, though, it was the busiest fortnight of their lives. Every day was a scramble to get into it everything that was planned.

John was busy, too. It was he who managed to get them all passage on the
Mauretania
-a very difficult thing to do at short notice. The next thing was passports. All the passports were out of date, and the children had never been abroad, so they neither had passports of their own nor were down on their parents’ passports. There were forms to fill in, and photographs to be taken, and hours to be spent in the passport office and, later, hours in the American Embassy waiting for visas, but John managed it all without bothering everybody else more than could be helped. He was like a very good sheepdog getting his sheep along at a nice speed in the right direction, with only an occasional little sharp bark. Oddly enough, though he looked terribly tired, hurrying about seemed to do him good; he was sleeping better than He had been since the accident. Best of all, when the tickets and the visaed passports were in the house, he labeled his portable typewriter and packed several packages of typing paper.

The children had their own affairs to put in order. The most difficult affair was, of course, Chewing-gum. Jane stuck to what she had said. If Chewing-gum was not going, neither would she go. She made awful threats. They would have to carry her to the boat, and she would scream all across the Atlantic. It was Dr. Smith who found the way out. He stopped by on his round of visits on the Monday morning after the great Wednesday to ask if there was any news from Aunt Cora. He did not need to come far inside the house to see there was, for Bee and Peaseblossom were packing in the hall. The children were at school, and John was at the passport office; but Bee and Peaseblossom were glad to sit down for a minute and tell him all about it.

“The only trouble,” Bee said, “is Jane. She says she won’t go without Chewing-gum.”

Peaseblossom broke in. “Don’t think we are paying any attention to her. She will, of course, do exactly as she’s told and be punished if she behaves badly.”

Bee went on. “But we don’t want anything to upset John, for he really does seem a little better. The other two are being splendidly helpful, and it’s particularly good of Rachel, as she had just been engaged to dance in a musical show.”

Dr. Smith thought for a minute; then he made a clicking noise with his tongue and held up a finger.

“Let me have a talk with Jane. You’ve all got to have certificates that you were recently vaccinated and that it took all right, before you can land in the United States. Lucky for you that I vaccinated you all this spring. You write a note asking me for certificates and get Jane to bring it around about four thirty and wait for an answer.”

Jane and Chewing-gum turned up at teatime at Dr. Smith’s house and were shown into his consulting room. He read the note just as if he had not known what was in it. Then he rang the bell.

“Your mother wants certificates to say I vaccinated you all. They will take time to write, so I suggest you and I and Chewing-gum have some tea before I get to work on them.”

It was a good tea. Jane was surprised at the sort of tea Dr. Smith ate all by himself: sandwiches, buns, and even some ginger cookies. He talked about Chewing-gum’s food, health, and coat until tea came, and it was only when Jane was eating a bun and Chewing-gum a sandwich that he mentioned America.

“Exciting business this, you all going off to California.”

Jane laid down her bun.

“The rest of the family may be going, but I’m not. I’ll chain myself to the furniture, and if they cut the chains I won’t walk; they’ll have to drag me, and I’ll scream all the way. I’m not leaving Chewing-gum.”

Dr. Smith did not show any, particular interest. He sipped his tea before he answered. “I see. Then it’s no good my saying what I was going to.”

“Not if it was to try and talk me around, it isn’t.”

“Not exactly,” the doctor said. “It was to ask you to lend Chewing-gum to me. There are some shocking car thieves about. I was thinking of getting a dog, but if I could have an old friend like Chewing-gum whom I could trust to stay with me, it would be a great help.”

Inside her, though she tried not to believe it, Jane knew she would not be allowed to stay behind, that she would be taken to America even if she did what she threatened and used chains and screamed. If she
had
to allow somebody else to look after Chewing-gum, Dr. Smith was the ideal person. At a doctor’s Chewing-gum’s health would be properly attended to, and he would have the right things to eat. However, she could not give way all at once. She had made such a scene for so long that it felt quite odd to think of stopping making a scene.

“Would you stand in a line for horsemeat?” Jane asked the doctor.

“Shouldn’t have to. Patient of mine sells the stuff. He’ll send around all I want.”

“He’s used to walking, not driving all day in a car.”

“Always manage one good walk myself every day; shall enjoy Chewing-gum’s company.”

“He’s never been a watchdog; he’s not a biting sort of dog. I don’t know how good he’d be at catching a thief.”

Dr. Smith gave Chewing-gum some tea in a bowl. “Soon learn. I’ll put a bone in the car with him. Any dog will bite anyone who comes near him when he’s got a bone.”

Jane thought that clever. “That’s a very good idea. I’d be glad if he did learn to be a fierce watchdog. I’d be glad if he learned to do anything really well, because I hope to be a dog trainer when I grow up, and to judge by Chewing-gum, I’ve got a lot to learn.” She lowered her voice. “As a matter of fact, he can carry a newspaper, but he’s still inclined to eat it.”

Dr. Smith nodded in the professional way he did when he visited anybody who was ill and someone explained to him what sort of being ill it was.

“Ah! Must see if I can help the old fellow about that. Very good of you, Jane, if you trust him to me.”

Either because Dr. Smith was so nice ‘or because talking about leaving Chewing-gum was the beginning of leaving him, Jane began to cry. She had been stubborn and angry since Wednesday, but she had not cried; now, when the tears started, they seemed to have been holding back an absolute river of tears. Dr. Smith was perfect. He sat her on his knee and let her cry and cry, and only when she had reached the hiccup and shudder stage did he talk. He told her about the dog he’d had when he was a boy and how terrible it had been when he first went to a boarding school. How he had thought his dog would starve and die without him. How surprised he had been when he came home for the holidays and his father brought his dog to the station to meet him. The dog nearly had hysterics, he was so pleased to see him; but when that was over, he was surprised to find the dog looked splendid, and when he had remarked on this to his father, his father had said,” ‘Course. Never make the mistake of thinking you ‘re the only animal lover in the world, and never be such a fool as to get so tied up with an animal that you can’t move without it. You’ll be a nuisance to yourself and everybody else.” Dr. Smith said he had found that was a very sensible thing to have said, and he thought Jane would, too. This going away for six months would be a useful way of getting used to leaving Chewing-gum if she had to and to trusting him to someone else.

Jane reached home as the family was finishing tea. She marched in and gave Bee the envelope of certificates. Then she stuck her chin in the air and said in a proud, don’t-you-dare-look-surprised tone of voice, “It may interest you to know I’ve decided to lend Chewing-gum to Dr. Smith while I’m in America. He needs a watchdog for his car.”

Bee had written on the evening of the great Wednesday to Madame Fidolia, to the head of Jane and Tim’s school, and to Mr. Brown. The letter to Jane and Tim’s school was just a notification that the children would be leaving England; the letters to Madame Fidolia and Mr. Brown said the same thing but were grateful and apologetic as well.

Rachel, knowing Madame Fidolia had been written to, did not tell her news to the other girls. She was quite sure Caroline would dance in the show in her place, but just in case somebody else was put in, it seemed better to say nothing. It would be too cruel to let poor Caroline hope again; she had not yet got over the first audition. It was so awful as Caroline told Rachel, to have been nearly chosen and then to end up as just an understudy. Rachel found it hard not to tell everybody her news. People kept coming up and congratulating her, and every time that happened she had a lump in her throat. She was glad when she got a message saying Madame wanted to see her before she went home.

Madame Fidolia was sitting in an armchair with Bee’s letter in her hand. To anyone who did not know her she was an odd-looking old lady. Her hair was dragged into a bun at the nape of her neck; she was wearing a dress so old-fashioned in shape, it might have come out of a museum. Around her shoulders was a shawl kept in place by a large cameo brooch. Lying on the table beside her was a tall cane, which she always used when she walked. On her feet were pink ballet shoes. To Rachel there was nothing queer about her at all. Madame was not a person you could be fond of exactly-she was too grand for that-but Rachel respected and admired her and was a little afraid of her. Madame no longer danced, but she had been a very great dancer, and her arrival to watch a class sent a shiver down Rachel’s spine. Madame could be patient, but she was very critical. Rachel dreaded hearing Madame’s stick tap on the floor, and her voice with its faintly foreign accent say, “Precision, Rachel. Precision.” That afternoon Madame waited for Rachel to curtsy and say, “Madame.” Then she gave her a lovely smile.

“Come in, my child. This is disappointing news for you and for me.”

That was so like Madame. She would understand at once. Lots of people would think it simply marvelous luck to be going to California for the winter, but not Madame. She would know just how awful it was to have your first stage engagement snatched away from you. Madame’s understanding so well was a strain on Rachel’s self-control. She felt tears smarting in her eyes and had to swallow before she could say, “Yes, Madame.”

Madame did not seem to notice that Rachel was upset. “But we must be sensible about it. A winter in the sunshine will be very good for your health. Nor are your chances much affected. I, of course, telephoned Mr. Glinken the moment I got your mother’s letter and explained about you. He asked which you were, and when I described you, he said, ‘Oh, it
would
be that one, but you tell her from me to work hard while she’s away and not to let Hollywood discover her,” and I may have something for her when she comes back.’”

Rachel could hardly believe she had really heard what Madame had said. Mr. Glinken remembered her! Mr. Glinken thought he might have something for her when she got back!

She felt so gay, it was quite difficult to keep from giving a pleased skip. She clasped her hands and said on a gasping breath, “Oh, Madame!”

Madame nodded. “Nice, isn’t it? We’ll keep him up to that when you get home. In the meantime, your disappointment is great news for your friend, Caroline, and whoever I put to take Caroline’s place as understudy, so you can look upon this California trip not as a misfortune but as the great adventure which it really is. Now, about your dancing lessons... “

Rachel dropped from happiness to despair.

“I shan’t be able to have any. Aunt Cora, whom we’re staying with, can’t be expected to do more than keep us; she couldn’t be expected to pay for classes.”

Madame nodded again. “I quite understand that. Indeed, your mother says as much in this letter. She says that to save trouble and expense, Miss Bean, who is traveling with you, will be teaching you your schoolwork; she asks for a report on your work and a list of the books that will be needed. Fortunately I can arrange about dancing lessons. Let me have your California address, and I will ask my old pupil Posy Fossil to look after you.”

Posy Fossil was a legend in school. There had never been dancer to touch her. Everybody knew that Posy was dancing in the movies and that she had a sister who was a movie star. To Rachel, being told that she was to meet Posy was like being told she was to meet Cinderella.

“Posy Fossil!”

“Yes, I don’t know what she can arrange as she is out of pictures now and working hard. Manoff’s forming his company again, and she is his star ballerina; but do not worry my child, Posy will look after you. Now run along and send Caroline to me.”

Rachel curtsied, murmured “Madame, and left the room. Outside the door she stood still for a moment to get things straight. Thoughts poured in on her, making her so happy and excited she felt as if she might burst with being pleased. She rushed around the school, looking for Caroline. When she found her, she flung her arms around her.

“Oh, I’m so happy, and so are you going to be minute. Go to Madame; she wants to see you. But the second she’s finished with you rush back here. I’ve got such marvelous things to tell you!”

Tim did not have a piano lesson with Mr. Brown until Friday. Because he was so excited about going to America, he had not practiced for two days. He knew Mr. Brown would understand, so he told him at once. Mr. Brown did understand; he said if anything like that had happened to him, he wouldn’t have practiced either.