Standing pressed up against her in the elevator a person walks on and then turns to me as I continue to run my hands all over her. “Man what the fuck are you doing?” I heard the person say.
“Mind your own damn business. This was our private elevator moment until you climbed on board!” and I continue reaching my hand under my wife’s short leather skirt. I heard her purr. Damn, Madison wearing this outfit is going to make me explode.
“I said, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, RAND?” I hear that loud and clear and back off from Madison to deal with this shithead, but it’s Kent standing in the elevator. He is looking at me dumbfounded. I look at him and then back to Madison to tell her I’m going to deposit his ass on the next floor. Only when I look at her puffy lips and the top that is pulled down showing her tits, I realize it isn’t my Madison, it is Meila.
“Oh my God! Oh Fuck!!! You’re not Madison. What the FUCK!!! Oh shit how much did I drink?” I began to ramble with my words and curse. I was frantic and confused.
She looked at me with a slightly wicked smile, “Oh Rand if Kent hadn’t interrupted, this would have been so good. You taste divine. I knew you would come to me eventually. Rand, I’m not going anywhere. I know you’ll be back to experience some more.”
Kent punched the next floor button and grabbed me by my shirt. When the doors opened he flung me out in front of the hotel guests. “You stupid fuck! Are you seriously trying to ruin your life, hurt other people? How could you forget about your wife?” Kent was pacing around me like a caged animal, and hotel guests were looking at us in amusement.
“I thought she was Madison. I drank too much, I don’t know! Listen to me man, that’s the truth, I swear on my mom’s grave, on my sister’s grave.” I must have looked pathetic. My belt buckle was undone, and in few moments Meila’s hands would have been down my pants. I shuttered at that thought and, grabbed Kent in a man hug. This was crazy. Moments ago I almost ruined my marriage, my entire life, in a drunken moment. No more. I promised him and myself that I wouldn’t drink that much again for the rest of the tour. Kent finally pushed me away from him. I was glad that there weren’t fans snapping pictures of this moment. I felt horrible. Kent led me to my room. When he opened the door, I barely made it to the toilet to puke. There was nothing fun about getting sick, my stomach wrenching in pain as I was laying next to the cold toilet. I knew Madison was dealing with her morning sickness, but that was all for something good. What I felt here and now was pure disgust.
I dragged my ass onto the plane. Kent stayed in between Meila and me. One time I glanced over at her, only to see her wink at me with a satisfied smile on her face. After that, I reached into my bag and pulled out a hat. I pulled it down over my face and decided to sleep. Nothing was going to happen with her. I was not going to drink too many at the after parties, and I was determined to stay far from her touch and advances. The tour was half over which meant it was only six more weeks until I would be home with my wife. Not that I needed a baby-sitter, but Kent felt the need to sit right next to me to ensure the seat was filled and that Meila would not move herself up next to me during the flight.
“I got your ass covered,” Kent says.
From under my hat I mutter “I know. I really owe you man, you saved my sorry ass last night.”
“What did you do last night?” Isaac chimes in.
“Nothing, absolutely nothing!” I reply and that was the extent of my plane ride conversation. I was done until they had to wake me to tell me that we landed.
* * *
With Rand now in the air flying to his next destination, I am going crazy trying to stay busy. I don’t want to constantly dwell on his being so far away from me. Often I turn to my writing to pass the time, but I am not really working on anything of importance at the moment. I was already finished with my latest novel
Mask of Rade
. Cecile had already sent it off to New York to the editor for round one of their review. I was wishing I had it back to dive into with rewrites, but that wasn’t going to happen today. Since it is such a beautiful day outdoors with the warm summer air calm and not humid, I decide to go enjoy the fresh air for a little while. All the flowers outside are in full bloom. I walk out onto the porch and make my way down the path to the bench that we had. I know I could sit there enjoying my iced coffee, and look at the sky and wonder what state Rand is flying over. I think this peaceful time will allow me to think about all that lies ahead for us. As I sip my favorite brew, I look out into the garden and it feels so peaceful and enchanting with the exquisite variety of vibrant colors. I want to remember to write a piece titled
Reflections
describing how endearing our love story had become.
With my feet tucked up by my side on the bench and the sun beating softly on my skin and soothing my body, I shut my eyes for a moment. I am lost in thought as my hands swirl across my stomach over the soft fabric of my sundress. Even with my eyes closed, I can still enjoy the colors of all the flowers. The image is vivid in my memory; the deepest purple and warmest golden yellow. My thoughts begin to wander to our loved ones that have passed on. I know that they would somehow get a glimpse of our happiness and our new babies. I replay their names in my head hoping they would hear the silent dedication.
When I open my eyes again, the sun is blocked by the tall man in front of me. I never heard his approach. It is Paul Rand. Squinting now as he moves to one side and asks, “May I join you for a chat?” I don’t want to offend Rand’s father even though I really don’t know him. He always seems to just show up unannounced.
“Here, let me sit up and give you some room on the bench.” I swung my legs over to one side and sat up straight. “Do you want anything to drink? I could go back inside and make you a lemonade or iced coffee?”
“No Madison, I just wanted to stop by and see how you were doing. I know Rand is on his tour. I have listened to all his new music, and clearly see his inspiration is you. Believe it or not, I am very proud of my son, but knowing that you are with child, he should be here with you.”
“Well, he will be returning soon. After two more states and several more shows, he will be home for awhile. I think he got a little carried away with all the songs he wrote about me…just a bit. And we aren’t with child.” I looked at him and smiled at his puzzled look for I was definitely showing a huge belly bump.
“I’m sorry for being forward, but you do look awfully pregnant,” Paul commented looking slightly amused.
“Please don’t apologize. I am very pregnant, but we are with not one child, but two. We are actually having twins.” I beamed at the announcement; I could never get used to saying that.
“Well double congratulations my dear,” he said and smiled genuinely. “I came to tell you that I hope one day I will be a part of your lives.” He stopped and dropped his head and then continued, “I would give anything I have to have my son back and to make this right, to make us better, and to finally have his forgiveness. I would give anything. In the past I fell into my own insecurities which made me run away like a coward from everyone who meant something to me. For the longest time I was convinced that only bad things were fated for me and those close to me. Now, I see you and my son and all the happiness you share.”
“Paul, I think he has gotten past what happened and just moved onward. Rand has so much going on in his life now that he hasn’t had a moment to dwell on any of the past. I think for once he is truly happy. Maybe one day you and he will make peace.”
“So why are you out here all alone sitting off in this corner of your property today?” Paul was making an effort at conversation.
“Well this area is special to us, so let me tell you why. We placed this bench here in order to come here and think when life got hectic for either of us, and also to remember our loved ones. I sit here often and wonder where Rand is at the moment in his busy tour schedule. I sit here and remember my father and Rand has spent time here reminding himself of how he was a great son to his mother and a wonderful brother to Ashley.”
“I messed up Madison. For so long I held on to the idea that music cursed everything, taking away all those I loved. I wasted so much time on being upset and hurt and feeling sorry for myself.” Paul was apologetic in his tone.
“There is always tomorrow to make things better. Let’s take baby steps, and see if Rand will meet with you once he gets home and is back to his routine here,” I chuckled at my comment of baby steps. Just then I got a sudden cramp that had me lean over taking a deep breath and blowing it out.
“Madison, are you okay?” Paul was up on his feet in front of me.
“I just had a pain but now the babies are kicking up a storm. I guess they were moving and getting themselves comfortable.” As I looked up at Paul, his eyes started to shine. “Do you want to feel them kick?” I reached out and placed his hand on the top of my belly. Just then his hand jumped, and he surely felt the inside beat.
“That is amazing. I never felt anything like that,” he was now teary eyed and wiped the wetness from the corner of his eye.
“You mean you never felt your own children while they were in your wife’s belly?”
“No, I never got the chance. We were always arguing about the music industry, even back then. There was never time as precious as this one you just shared, so thank you.”
My phone sounded and I knew it was Rand. I suppose he just landed, and I had to take the call because if it went to voice mail he would begin to worry. “Excuse me Paul, I have to take this for a moment.” I turned my back to Paul for a bit of privacy and spoke softly, “So you landed safely…I was sitting out here on our bench and wondering where you were in the world at this moment.”
“Love we arrived fine. Just missing you already, and I love you so much!” Rand’s voice carried through my phone directly to my heart.
“I love you too.” I said more softly knowing I had company present. Before our call ended, he told me he would check back with me after he got his luggage. When I turned back to continue to talk with Paul, he was gone. I heard the sound of an engine start up, and I knew he had again left as suddenly as he had arrived.
* * *
Calling Madison to tell her we arrived safely is my normal routine. As scared as I was to screw things up, and feeling so awful and disgusting for what almost happened last night with Meila, I am more determined than ever not to blow this. I am going to continue to make Madison feel that everything is fine, and then she won’t worry. I reach for my luggage only to see next to me, a pair of gorgeous legs in the shortest shorts—if you could even call them that. I followed the path up those tan legs, and continued on up until I could see a very happy smile looking right at me. Meila seems pleased at the path my eyes took in checking her out. I shake my head, not going there I said in my head, and I grabbed at my bag not even waiting around to offer to get hers. I have to get away from her. I don’t feel like dealing with her game.
I stayed in my hotel room all day long, despite the guys calling me to come out. I told them I felt a bit under the weather, and wanted to be rested for the show this evening. It wasn’t a complete lie, I did feel pretty rough. It was to be our first performance in Texas. I had traveled here before as part of the Rolling Isaacs, but now I was here as Max Rand. Finally, my room was silent with no one calling to get me out. As I lie back on the pillows and look at the ceiling I begin thinking of all the events of the past twenty four hour period. I was so close to fucking everything up. So close. I now have to make certain to play to the fans, and put his mishap behind me. I pull out my phone and call my wife. I want to hear her sweet voice. I am so frustrated from last night, and so tense from being in close proximity to Meila on the airplane for hours that I need relief and I know that I only want that from my one and only love. “Hey Love, what are you doing right now?” I started as pleasantly as I could.
“Oh, just finishing up some revisions that started to come back to me from the editor for my novel.”