My Heart is Yours (19 page)

***

T
hey put the last of the
money down on the kitchen table.

“That’s what we have so far.” Sam said. “Are we even
close?”

“We need more. If we want a wedding and a house
anyway.” Jason said.

Sam put her chin on her hands and thought. All she
wanted was to marry Jason and be together. That was all that
mattered to her. How could they get both a wedding and a house with
what they had? A vision popped into her mind. Yes. That was it. It
was all they needed. Would Jason go for it?

“Sam? What are you grinning about?” Jason tucked a
strand of hair behind her ear.

“Listen. We want a church wedding, right?”

“Yes we do.”

“Okay. We’re doing that. But the reception doesn’t
have to be big. If we can find someone to do it in someone’s
backyard.”

“No.” Jason said. “No. You deserve more.” He shook
his head and his shaggy black hair fell into his eyes
frantically.

“More than what? More than you? I just want to be
married and have a nice little place to live. A big huge reception
isn’t what matters to me. I swear. I just want to be with you.”

“Sam, babe.” He sighed.

“Babe, nothing. Don’t ‘babe’ me. This is how we get
what we want.”

“You can do it in my yard.” Juliana stepped up
behind Sam’s shoulder. “We have plenty of room. It’ll just be you
guys, my family, and a few professors right? We can do this.”

Sam turned to Jason, her eyes lit with sparks of
hope and love. He saw those eyes; saw all she really wanted. And he
knew it was right. “Alright.” He said. She threw herself into his
jean jacket clad arms. Juliana squealed in the background. Sam left
her head on Jason’s shoulder and inhaled. He still had the scent of
cigarette on him. He wouldn’t be him without it though. As much as
she’d love him to quit, she didn’t think he ever would. But she had
what she wanted now. She didn’t need or want a big reception. All
that she wanted was him.

We finally have a location for the wedding. The
wedding. I still have a hard time believing that. I’m getting
married. I’m actually getting married. It’s still unbelievable to
me. Maybe I’ll believe it when I’m actually married. I’m getting
married to Jason. Jason; who I’ve known since I was six. I feel
like I should be saying I never thought that I’d marry him, but I
think that a part of me always thought that I would someday. Even
with how shy we both were (still are) and people trying to keep us
apart, part of me always knew that we’d end up together.

Sam shut her journal with a smile, placed it on her
nightstand and laid down, pulling the covers up over her before
falling asleep with a smile on her face.

“O
uch. Son of a…” Sam
muttered as she stubbed her toe on the threshold to her bedroom
door.

“Sorry, honey.” Jason said. He led her over the
shaggy off-white carpet. “Almost there.”

“Almost where?”

They stopped right in front of Sam’s twin sized bed.
Gently Jason untied the blind fold and told her to turn around. She
spun like a jewelry box ballerina to face her bed. A small gasp
escaped her now parted lips.

Jason had strewn the bed with pink rose petals. The
pale pink had a cosmic effect against this set of white sheets. The
Greek goddess Aphrodite came to mind. She could picture her
watching them up amongst the stars. On the bed were several small
wrapped gifts as well. They were all wrapped in paper with a pale
silver sheen keeping up with the cosmic effect the room was already
having on Sam. There were four packages total. Each one also had a
pale pink ribbon tied carefully into a bow around it. Everything
was so beautiful that for a moment the fact that Sam hated pink
completely fled her mind. She wondered who had done the bows.

“This is all for me?” Sam wondered aloud.

“Of course. Open one, baby.” Jason grinned.

After a minute of hesitation Sam reached for the
largest package. Carefully and slowly she began to unwrap it. She
didn’t want to rip the paper. It looked expensive and maybe they
could use it again.

After a minute the package finally popped out. It
was a perfect square. It was a perfect shade of heavenly white and
all over it were embossed designs of flowers covering it. It was
also made to look like a ribbon was wrapped around it tied into a
bow. On the front on bold white embossed letters it said “Our
Wedding”. A photo album. It was a photo album for their wedding.
Tear drops began to form at the corners of each of Sam’s eyes.
Jason lifted the package out of Sam’s hands and placed a
rectangular shape one in them.

The unwrapping process began again. “Oh my
goodness.” She managed to get out when she what it was. Held in her
hands was the
Selected Poems of Emily Dickinson
. Her
favorite poet ever since she read her poem “I’m nobody! Who are
you?” in junior high school. Jason chuckled. “There’s more.”

A much heavier square package was placed carefully
in both of her hands. She held it carefully for a moment, light
eyebrows drawn together and then unwrapped the heavy package. The
wood on the box was light cherry. There was a glass cut out in the
top so you could see into the top scene. It was a simple one of a
ballerina wearing a pink leotard and tutu practicing at the bar but
it was exquisite. When the top was lifted the little scene with the
ballerina began to spin and “Vivaldi’s Four Seasons—The Spring
Movement” began to play.

“To put this in. But I hope you don’t take this
off.” Jason said simply as he plopped the last little square
package into her hand. This she could hold in one hand. It was
wrapped tightly in the same beautiful paper. It took a little
longer to unwrap than the others, but she still managed to save the
paper. The inside of the paper was white and shiny. Jason’s dark
eyes were glowing as he waited for her to lift the top on this last
box. She couldn’t do it fast enough for him. He had waited forever
for this moment.

Before he got to do it though Sam froze. Staring at
her in its gray square velvety box was a ring. The band was a
simple single silver band. Coming out from the center stone on
either side were two small round diamonds. Shining out from the
center was a sapphire stone slightly larger than the four other
stones. Speech and air vacated Sam’s lungs.

Jason dropped to his knee. If it was possible, her
breath left her even more. “Samantha Marie Ramsden, I love you. I
love you so much. I’m not glad about what happened to you as a
little girl, but I’m glad it brought us together. Let’s not be
apart. Will you marry me?”

The air came rushing back. “Yes!” she cried. “Yes,
Jason Robert Channing, I will.” She whispered.

He beamed even though he’d known the answer long
ago. This was the moment he was hoping for. For a year he scrimped
to put away $40 every month so that he’d have enough to get Sam
this ring. Last month he finally had enough but he thought that he
should wait until Christmas to give it to her. He slipped it on her
finger. The dark sapphire stone stood out beautifully against her
skin. She absolutely sparkled. The ring caught a glint in her
matching dark blue eyes. His sapphire girl.

She slid slowly into his arms and simply lingered.
“Thank you.” She whispered. “Thank you so much.” She knew not to
tell him he’d done too much; this was not the time.

“Merry Christmas, baby.” He whispered back.

***

S
am groaned as her hair
flopped onto the kitchen table in front of her. “Can we take a
break?” Her voice sounded flat. They had been at this for hours.
Maybe not hours, but it felt like it. Those damn magazines out on
their kitchen table, surrounded by pages upon pages of notes made
by Juliana. There was not a square inch of wood in sight.

“No.” Juliana shot back. “Stop pouting. This stuff
won’t magically do itself.”

Sam heaved an exaggerated sigh.

“Shut up.” Juliana said, tossing her hair over her
shoulder.

It wasn’t that Sam didn’t want to marry Jason. That
would be the most ludicrous idea on the planet. But this was not
her thing. She was raised a tomboy. She just wasn’t into looking at
masses of stuff that could only be described as “frilly” and
“girly” for non-stop periods of time.

Jason grinned at his bride-to-be over his cup of
coffee. He knew this wouldn’t go over well with her. An entire day
of only wedding planning? But he knew she’d get into it. She may
doubt that, but he didn’t.

“What are you grinning at?” Sam asked.

“You.” He said softly.

She blushed. “Oh, that you can handle but not
wedding planning?” Juliana said. Sam stuck her tongue out at her.
“Very bride like.” Juliana nodded. “Moving on. Who is going to be
your maid of honor?”

Sam blinked.
Is she serious?

“Really? What kind of question is that?” Sam
asked.

“A necessary one.”

“Jules, you know it’s going to be you.”

“I know.” She smiled, checking something off of a
list she held in her hand written on a white legal pad.

“What’s next, Doc?” Sam asked.

“Jason’s best man.”

The kitchen light felt too hot on him now. Like a
spotlight. How was he going to choose?

“We can give him more time on that.” Sam jumped
in.

Juliana met her eyes for a moment and nodded. She
knew this wouldn’t be easy for him. “No problem. Plenty more to
talk about. Okay, let’s go on to flowers. Your bouquet. What would
you like?”

Sam’s favorite flower was lilies, but she knew that
they couldn’t afford them so she didn’t bring it up. She furrowed
her brow. This would require some thinking. What were flowers she
liked that they could afford?

“Well, the wedding is in January. So it’s smack in
the middle of winter. What are wintery flowers?” Juliana said.