My Mind's Eye (Pub Fiction #1) (15 page)

BOOK: My Mind's Eye (Pub Fiction #1)
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After shutting everything in the living room off and cleaning up our mugs and bowls, I head up to my room too, but to think. My conversation with Claire helped a ton, but I seriously feel overwhelmed and I need to reflect more on what the hell I’m going to do with the Mr. Honeybutter situation.

Chapter 14

Ryker

October

F
uck me!
My dick has been hard for over a month now, ever since Kat barged into my life. Not hard in the ‘I can tug it out in the shower to make it better’ way, either. No, I mean hard for that sweet little thing, Kat. Fuck. Ever since the time I practically broke her when I bumped into her, and then when I walked in on her in the staff room. Shit! I have been harder than Wolverine’s adamantium claws. Anytime I think about her, it’s like—
bam!
—my dick’s at full attention. Her pouty little mouth and that fucking attitude she tries to give me, just make me crazy. God, I swear, a guy can only eye-fuck a chick so hard for so long before needing the real thing.
She’s fucking beautiful
.

Thank Christ we don’t work together; I don’t know what I would do.
Yeah, I do. I’d be fucking her in the staff room, supply room, maybe even on Levi’s desk? Fuck
. That last Friday shift in August nearly killed me. Thinking of that shift, I would have killed that son of a bitch had he laid a finger on her that night. Since that incident, I’ve had Levi make sure all late-night employees are escorted to their cars by security. That way I can make sure she—no,
all
—of the female staff are safe when leaving work.

I wonder who that asshole was?
Fuck, why do I care?
’Cause she gets to you.

It doesn’t fucking matter who that asshole is, anyway. I told him if I saw him sniffin’ around Kat or the bar again, he’d live to regret it. He tried to tell me she was
his
. I laughed in his face. It was priceless.
“You’re not man enough for that girl, asshole. You probably wouldn’t know what to do with a fine piece of ass like Kat.” I grabbed him by the collar, stood toe-to-toe with him. “She’s fucking sweet and MINE. My advice from this point on…
fuck the hell off.
I protect what’s mine. Now get the fuck outta here before I change my mind and kick your ass.”
I don’t know why I told him she was mine, but I did. And if I’m being honest, I like the way it sounded.
A lot.

“Matty, you ’bout ready to get the fuck going yet or what, pretty boy? You need me to come do your makeup?” Justin, my roommate, yells out to Matt, our other roommate, and my best friend. We’re sitting in our living room sipping beer before heading to the bar, waiting on Matt like always. “Let’s fuckin’ go, dude.” He shouts out again, shaking me free from my thoughts. He turns to me. “You all right, brother? You seem preoccupied. You itching for some sweet pussy like I am? It’s been a slow week. Between work and school, that’s all I’ve done. I sure as shit need to relieve some tension tonight,” he admits with a grin.

“Naw, man, I’m good. Was just thinking about work shit, is all. Yeah, of course I’m ready. I’m always fucking ready. I could definitely use a distraction.” I stand and nod at his beer. “Another? Seeing as Princess isn’t fuckin’ ready yet…”

Man, I need, just need, to get laid. I realize this the more I think about Kat’s tight body.

It sure as hell doesn’t help that Claire, her fucking roommate, can’t seem to stop talking to me about all things Kat and showing me pictures. She’s taunting me on purpose, I swear. She gave me the biggest hug and thanked me for helping Kat with her ex. It’s almost as if she really is on to me. Like she knows, despite my aloofness to her ramblings, how affected I am by Kat, that I’m actually quite interested in learning about her.

Thank God the boys and I are headed to the bar tonight. I’m sure to find a hot piece of ass there to take the edge off. It’s only been this long because Levi’s needed me to work a few mornings helping out this daily operations when I don’t have classes on top of my usual nights since two full-timers up and quit mid-September, leaving us short-handed.
Liar.

“Dude, let’s fucking go. The Beaver and Bulldog is gonna be jammed with the hotties by now; it’s almost eleven. I am not coming home alone tonight. Let’s fuckin’
go
, man. Five more minutes and we’re leavin’ your ass behind,” I yell up the stairs as I grab two more beers for Justin and me from the fridge.

Tonight my plan is to get myself back into the game. Back to thinking about taking care of me and my needs. Seriously, no more thoughts of hot girl for this guy. Like I said, I don’t do relationships.
Why the hell am I letting this girl get to me?
Thoughts of her have been distracting me non-stop, her beautiful smile popping in my head at the wrong times, all the time. I don’t like not being in control; well, tonight I’m taking that control back.

It’s not that the opportunity for a serious relationship hasn’t presented itself since my breakup two years ago. Believe me, if I wanted a steady girlfriend, I’d have a bevy of choices. Cocky or not, it’s the truth. But like I said, it’s been all about release for me. I don’t have time for feelings and emotions or idle chitchat about shit I couldn’t care less about. I have goals and a life plan that I intend on seeing through to the end. It’s not like I’m here to find, meet, and marry the head cheerleader. No, for right now, it’s all about getting my dick wet.

I’ve been totally consumed with being at work and school all the time that I guess thoughts of her have been able to seep into my mind’s eye through the cracks, taking up spaces that aren’t usually reserved for only one girl. And after tonight, she will slip on out just as quickly as I slip my dick inside the pussy of the chick I allow to grace my bed for a few hours.
Goodbye, Kat.

There’s a thunder from the stairs and, suddenly, Matty bounces into the room ready to go.

“How do I look?” Matt twirls in front of us, like the chick he is once he’s finally downstairs, ready to get the night on.

His signature cologne as it clouds the room and I notice he’s spiked his short hair up in the front tonight.

“Aww, Matty, you look very pretty. I just love your hair all spiky like that.” I point and he calls me a douche.

“Nah, fuck, man, you still look like a dick. What the fuck? We thought you were changing,” Justin razzes Matty, and we share a good laugh at his expense.

“Sorry I took so long. My room was a mess. I needed to make it pussy safe. I don’t need some chick-repellent smell making my night’s fuck change her mind suddenly because my room smells like a hockey bag, you know? This guy needs to get laid tonight.” He points double fingers at himself, and I can’t leave it alone.

“Dude, your face alone is a pussy-repellent. It’s not your room you need to worry about,” I say, downing the last swallow of beer.

“Fuck you, Ryk, you pretty boy. Let’s fuckin’ go. I’ll show you how the ladies love Matty. I ain’t no repellent. I’m like a fucking magnet…a chick magnet.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, dude,” says Justin, “that was lame. Do not say shit like that again.

And maybe if you cleaned your room on a more regular basis, you wouldn’t be wasting our trolling time. Let’s fuckin’ go already.”

Bring it on,
says my cock.

Chapter 15

Kat

C
laire and I are finally off together on a Saturday night. We decide to take complete advantage of the weekend.

Thank goodness tonight we are heading out for a night of fun along with our roommates and two other friends, Jenn and Laurie, whom we met in our teacher’s program. We are in for a night of drinking, dancing, and what is sure to be a shit-show. I seriously cannot wait!

I rush home from studying at the library to grab a bite to eat and get ready. Knowing Claire, she will have the house set up like a beauty salon, armed to primp and pimp us all out.

Making my way through the front door, I stumble on the mess of shoes that greets me as I make my way inside.
Of course the festivities have already begun
. I hear laughter and Taylor Swift on the stereo singing about how a player will always play.
Isn’t that the truth
, I think as an image of Ryker pops into my mind.

“Hey, ladies,” I call, kicking off my runners. “I see you started without me.”

Amanda is stationed at the blender, making what looks like margaritas. I see her adding in tequila to the slushy concoction before turning it on, once again drowning out the sounds in the kitchen. Once she’s done, the smell of fresh limes and Cointreau lingers in the air and I wet my lips in anticipation. That girl makes a killer ’rita; it has me salivating just thinking about it.

“For you, my lovely. It’s about fucking time you got here, ya book worm,” Radha says and hands me her drink.

“We were starving. I hope you don’t mind, we ordered pizza. We’ve been sitting here chatting all things boys, sex, and margaritas,” Kym adds. “Glad you’re finally here to join us. Pizza?” She hands me a plate and napkin and a slice of pepperoni pizza that oozes with cheese.

Glancing at the clock, I’m surprised to see it’s already six o’clock.
Wow, that paper took me a lot longer to research than I thought.
With all of the new concepts being developed in the field of Inquiry Based Learning in the forefront of teaching, I decided how to implement it in the primary grades would be a great topic for my final essay in my Primary Education class. It’s not due until December, but it’s a huge research paper and it’s a good thing I’m starting early as I’ve just spent the last six hours at the library.

“Kitty!” I hear a shriek from an excited Claire as I approach her. “Amanda, get this bitch another ’rita; she’s got some catching up to do!”

I laugh as Kym passes me another salt-rimmed glass oozing with liquid perfection. Doubled fisted now, I take a seat next to Radha and Jenn, and lift my two glasses to utter a toast my brother taught me, which I know they’ll all love.

“Attention! Attention! In honour of our first official girls’ night out, I’d like to make a toast! Amanda, get your skinny ass over here and join us.” I raise my glass higher, prompting the others to follow. “Ahem, okay, ladies. A toast to kick off the night. Thank you, Wes Rollins, for teaching me this.” I clear my throat again before loudly expelling the rest of my toast. “Here’s to you, here’s to me. Friends forever we shall be,” a collective
awww
ensues before I can finish, but I raise my glass higher and clear my throat. “And if ever we should disagree, then fuck you. Here’s to me!” I take a huge gulp before bursting out laughing at their faces.

“Oh my God, Kat!” Radha smiles. “I did not expect that from you.”

“Cheers. That was the best toast ever, you bitch.” Beth smiles.

“You can be such an ass, my dear Kitty Kat,” says Jenn.

We begin the production of getting ready for our night out on the town, but before we head upstairs to join the others, Claire and I decide to grab everyone another drink. While I pour us all our fourth round since I’ve been home, I can’t help thinking that it’s a good thing our glasses aren’t too big or else I’d be a mess right now. As I even them out, Claire starts on about her vision for my night.
I love the effort this girl puts into my love life.

“Kitty Kat, I’m looking forward to getting our dance on tonight, and getting you laid! No more waiting for Mr. Right; we need Mr. Tonight!” She laughs at her stupid joke while carrying the tray up the stairs to where all the girls are.

I opt for a sexy little black number that hugs my girls amazingly, perfecting my line of cleavage. I compliment my outfit with a pair of silver heeled sandals with straps that wind around my legs, stopping just above my calves. Beth finishes my sultry look with some smoky eye shadow in a beautiful violet, which makes my green eyes really pop. I complete my look with silver hoop earrings and a wristlet, apply some tinted lip gloss, and am ready to go after spritzing myself with my favourite scent.

I have to admit, we are a hot group of girls, all dressed up in our sexy outfits with our makeup and hair all done. It’s smells like a beauty salon in the house, but that’s to be expected with all the primping that’s gone on. After taking what feels like a million pictures and uploading them to Facebook, while we indulge in one more margarita, we finally pile into a taxi van and head out to the bar at 10:30 p.m.

Walking into The Beaver and Bulldog with my girls, I glance to the emergency doors and relax. It’s a habit I still do everywhere I go, like a tic. Dr. Lukas assures me this is normal and should lessen over time. We spot a few other students from our classes and greet each other. Everyone’s dressed up, happy, and beautiful. The music is blasting from the speakers, and the vibe is positive all around. Seeing my glowing reflection in the mirror over the bar, I feel full of my own power. I look damn good I think, and decide that tonight I’m going to cut loose for once. I am not going to be my usual uptight self. I plan to get my drink on even more and maybe, just
maybe
, listen to Claire and get myself laid. Say fuck it, let me be the player tonight.

It has really been too long, like way too long. Claire is right and I know it. But since Seth and I broke up, I just haven’t been feeling it. I think Seth’s incessant texts and emails claiming how he wants me back haven’t exactly helped either. Since the night at the bar, he still texts me at least once a week. It’s tough when you’re constantly being made to feel guilty by the person in the wrong, like he has no clue why I don’t want to hear what he has to say anymore. I’m being made to feel like I’m the one responsible for pushing him to cheat on me. As if it was me who took his dick and shoved it into that whore. But still, after being cheated on, you can’t help wonder.
Is it really me? Am I that bad in bed? Am I too demanding? Or am I just not good enough?
Needless to say, after some soul-searching and lots of Claire-therapy, I discovered it wasn’t my fault at all. He chose to cheat. I’ve since changed my number and email again, hopefully, the asshead cannot reach me and just gives up.

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