Naked 2 : BAD (5 page)

For a brief moment, she wondered if she’d simply imagined the whole thing.

Maybe she was the crazy one and Jayson was her innocent victim.

“It’s me,” she said, shaking off the moment of weakness. “Caelyn.” Her voice weakened at the end, and she had to resist the sudden, powerful urge to turn and run.

It’s not worth it, it’s not worth it, it’s not worth it
!

The frightened, childlike voice cried out in her mind. The voice was compelling, as was the urge to run home and pretend none of this had ever happened.

She swallowed back the sickness that rose in her throat, as Jayson buzzed her in.

The sound brought back the memory of the other night, when she’d been happy and excited to go inside and see him.

She almost didn’t get to the door in time, but at the very last second, her hand shot out, as if with a mind of its own, and pushed the door open.

The next few moments were a blur, yet somehow in slow motion, as she walked up the echoing steps and down the hallway to stand in front of his apartment door.

She went to knock again, but the door swung open before she even had a chance, and he was standing there, as if he’d been waiting all along for just this moment. Jayson loomed over her, still sporting a black eye and a few visible scratches on his face, wearing a loose Cambridge Rowing sweatshirt and jeans. He looked at her with a strange, almost confused expression on his face.

“Why did you come here?” he said, not making way for her to enter the apartment.

She stood tall, refusing to shrink away from him. “Because, we need to talk,” she said, simply. “Is anyone else here?”

He shook his head slowly. “No.” Then he smiled. “Should I find someone, so you don’t accuse me of another crime?”

“It’s not an accusation,” she began. She was about to say,
it’s the truth
—but something stopped her. She’d been ready to play rough, to threaten him with a nasty trial, tainting his reputation and possibly getting him expelled from school. She would say that all of this was going to become reality unless he agreed to drop the charges against Elijah.

But suddenly, some little instinct kicked in and told her that threats would not work with a person like Jayson. He wasn’t normal. Threats would only make him more insistent on hurting her in return, and hurting Elijah would just be a bonus.

“What is it, then, if not an accusation?” Jayson said, snapping her back to reality.

“Didn’t you tell the police I raped you?”

“Listen, I want to talk to you about that. Can I—“ she swallowed again, feeling her stomach lurch. Thank God she hadn’t eaten much that day. “Can I come inside?”

For a moment, Jayson looked bizarrely eager, and the expression on his face only made him more repulsive to her.

They went inside and she tried not to think about everything that had gone on between them in this horrible apartment. It had since been cleaned and apparently fumigated of that awful pizza smell. The entire place was bright, and everything was tidy and orderly.

In all likelihood, a professional had cleaned the place. A paranoid part of her mind wondered if perhaps it hadn’t been a regular cleaning person, but actually someone trained to get the DNA and signs of the rape out of all the offending pieces of furniture?

“Want a glass of water, coffee, tea?” he asked, as he led her inside.

“No thanks,” she said, although her mouth was totally dry. However, she didn’t trust him to give her a drink without trying to slip her a roofie.

He led her toward the couch, but Jayson sat down in the recliner nearby, thankfully.

He crossed his legs and folded his arms as if she had come begging for forgiveness, and he was a judge about to decide her fate. “So, what do you want to say to me, Caelyn?”

“I think things have gotten out of control,” she began, sitting down on the couch and trying to forget what had happened on it not so long ago.

He snorted. “That’s the understatement of the year. I find out you took off to Florida without a word, and then I go to bring you home and you have some thug assault me out of the blue. Next thing I know, as I’m leaving the hospital after getting my head x-rayed, I find out you’ve accused me of rape. I damn well say things have gotten out of control, all right.”

She could hear the restrained rage in his voice, and it shook her.

Being alone with him in this apartment didn’t just feel dangerous—it
was
dangerous. She knew from experience that Jayson was capable of pretty much anything, and right now she was skating on very thin ice.

“That’s why I’m here,” she said softly. She met his cold, dead eyes and tried to pretend that she wasn’t completely revolted. Caelyn tried on a fake, submissive smile.

“I’m here because I realize that, Jayson.”

For the first time, Jayson’s body language changed from cold and detached to more engaged. He sat forward in his seat, his big frame moving quicker than she would have expected.

It took all of her courage not to scream and run for the door. But she was here for more than just herself—she was here for Elijah, and determined to be strong for him.

Jayson leaned his elbows on his knees as he looked at her. “I don’t get it, Caelyn.

You’re sending me some pretty mixed signals. I mean—you fucking accused me of raping you.”

Because you did rape me
, she wanted to shout in his face.

Instead, Caelyn took a slow, deep breath, and exhaled. “What happened the other night between us…” she had a flash of him holding her down, and his voice, low and threatening. “It was very confusing.”

He blinked a few times. “Were you a virgin?” His nostrils flared.

“I don’t want to talk about that right now.”

“You’re right,” he said, waving the question off, “it’s beside the point. But you can’t come in here and just expect me to be cool now, after what you’ve done to me. You know there’s no way you can win in court. I mean, my family…” he shook his head.

“They would do anything to protect me, Caelyn. Anything.”

“Maybe there’s a solution,” she offered.

His eyebrows lifted. “A truce?”

“Maybe.”

“I’m listening.” He smiled, a flash of the old Jayson, the façade that he’d used to seduce her in the beginning. Now she saw through it for what it was—a cheap trick used to fool the naïve and sheltered girls he came into contact with—a complete fraud.

“I want to drop the charges against you,” she said.

“Really.” His expression didn’t change but the intensity in his eyes deepened.

“Now why would you do that?”

“Because, I think we need to stop all of this.”

“I agree. I’m just trying to figure out why the sudden change of heart.” He sat back in his chair again, rubbing a finger below his lip, watching her. “Are you playing games with me, Caelyn? I mean, what the hell am I supposed to think?”

“Just take it for what it’s worth,” she said.

“So you’ll drop the charges?” he said. “And that’s that?”

“All I ask is that you drop the charges against Elijah.”

Suddenly, Jayson’s expression darkened. It was like the mask had momentarily been pulled off at the unexpected mention of the man who had hurt him. For a brief second or two, he looked positively insane—no different than a deranged serial killer you might see on the news.

But then he seemed to get control of himself again, and the mask went back on. His face relaxed a little, and he appeared to think about what she’d said. He began rubbing under his lip again, repetitively, as he considered her offer.

She wanted to slap him, punch him. More than anything though, she wanted to make him stop rubbing his chin like that. It was worse than nails on a chalkboard.

A shiver of hate and fear ran down her spine.

The silence in the room was deafening. But finally, he spoke. “The guy is a menace, Caelyn. I’m not sure how much you know about him, but I’ve been told that he’s a really nasty character. Like, as low as they come. Completely uneducated, been in and out of institutions his entire life.”

He’s a million times better than you could ever hope to be
, she wanted to say. But she bit her tongue. Literally, she closed her jaw and forced herself not to speak. And then she gathered her composure.

“I’m not going to defend what he did to you,” she said. “But I really want to make all of this go away.”

“I’m not sure why I should drop my charges against him,” Jayson said. “After all, we both know that I didn’t…I didn’t do what you say I did, and you have no proof of anything. You won’t be able to convict me, Caelyn. As for Elijah, we have witnesses that he attacked me out of nowhere, and the guy’s got a record as long as a roll of toilet paper.”

“I’m not asking you to do it as a trade-off,” she lied. “I’m asking you to do it because…well…because I’m asking you. I’m saying, let’s put all of it behind us.”

Now he seemed interested again. There was a look on his face that she didn’t like, but she couldn’t figure it out at first. And then she realized that the look on his face was excitement. He was enjoying all of this.

“I’d be willing to put it all behind us,” he said, “if you mean that literally.” He got out of the recliner and started pacing in front of her. “What I mean is, there was a reason I came to the restaurant in Florida to find you, Caelyn. I’ve never done that for a girl before.

I did that for you.”

What am I, supposed to feel special because the man who raped me tracked me
down to a place in another state where I’d run to escape him?
Are you really that crazy,
Jayson?

Of course, she knew the answer. And as sick as he made her, this was the direction she needed things to move if she was going to have a chance to help Elijah stay out of jail.

“I really appreciate that,” she said. It was awful to say the words. Her entire body was revolting now, shaking, and she was growing even more nauseous. But she forced herself to continue. “I get that this whole thing must have really made your head spin.”

He laughed harshly. “You can say that again.” He stopped pacing and looked at her. “So, you’ll let it go and try and start fresh?”

“You mean…”

“I mean us,” he said. “I mean, I’m kind of taking this all to mean that you realize there’s still something here with me and you.”

It only took a few seconds, but in that short timeframe, her mind calculated out all of the possibilities. She could tell him to go screw and hope that he dropped the charges against Elijah anyway. She could threaten him, tell him she would go to the newspapers, do everything in her power to ruin his reputation if he didn’t drop them.

But in the end, she knew that opposing Jayson like that would only fuel him to fight back harder. He truly believed that he was immune, protected by his wealthy family and his impeccable reputation.

Threatening him right now would never work and she saw that clearly.

“I do realize that,” she replied, locking eyes with him.

He towered over her, and for a moment, she was certain he was going to simply rape her again. In his twisted mind, he probably thought she’d just given him permission to do whatever he wanted.

She felt frozen in place. Terrified, sick, wanting nothing more than to run and forget all of this had happened, she sat and watched him.

Jayson looked down at her, and a strange smile crept across his face. “I’m glad you said that,” he told her. “Really glad. I want to get past this, Caelyn.”

He reached out and softly touched her shoulder, and Caelyn had to repress a shudder. “I do too.”

“Okay, then,” Jayson said, his voice becoming more restrained, almost as if they were ending a formal business meeting. “We’re agreed. I’ll drop my charges against your…friend….”

“Thank you,” she said.

“And you,” he continued, “will drop your charges against me.”

She nodded. “That’s right.”

He crossed his arms. “Well then, I guess it’s settled.”

She stood up. “Great. Shall we go?”

A puzzled look crossed his features. “Go?”

“To the police station. No time like the present, right?”

“You’re in quite the rush.”

“I just think we’ll both feel better when it’s done, and I want to show you that I’m serious.”

“I believe you.”

“And I want to know that you’re serious, too.”

He looked at her intently. “I’m starting to feel like maybe this isn’t a request, so much as an order, Caelyn.”

She smiled, practically batting her eyelashes at him. “Not at all, Jayson. But I want to turn a new page between the two of us. Shouldn’t we turn it together—now?”

After a moment, his expression softened a little. “Why not?” he said. “Should we drive over there together?”

“Absolutely.” Her smile widened, even as the idea of being that close to him made her want to be sick.

“Okay, give me a second to freshen up,” he told her, and then he left for the bathroom.

She watched him go, and slowly, her jaw unclenched and she realized she’d been making tight fists with her hands at the end.

Relax, Caelyn. You have to stop freaking out or he’ll realize this is all a big lie to
get him to do what you want. Now, you’re almost there. Just chill the hell out.

But it was difficult. Every atom in her body wanted to revolt against what was happening and the things she was doing. None of this was natural, it was a total fight against her nature.

This man had done the worst thing possible to her, and here she was trying to smooth it all over and give him the impression that he still had a chance with her.

It was disgusting. It was wrong.

But there was no other way that she could see. That was the unfortunate truth, and Caelyn didn’t know what else to do.

A few minutes later, Jayson came back into the living room. He’d put on a new shirt and styled his hair, applied some cologne. She recognized the strong scent from the other night and nearly gagged.

But she managed a weak smile. “Ready?” she said.

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” he replied.

And then they left his apartment and headed for the police station.