Needing Her (10 page)

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Authors: Molly McAdams

Tags: #Fiction, #Romance, #New Adult, #Coming of Age, #Contemporary, #Contemporary Women

BOOK: Needing Her
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When I got home, taped to my door was an envelope with the words “Bro, have you seen this? They’re everywhere!” scrawled across it. I pulled out the brightly colored paper as I looked up and down the hall for anyone who might have left the note, unfolded it, and did a double take when I saw my picture blown up on it. Across the top in large, bold writing was
SWM LOOKING FOR SBM WHO WILL CALL ME DADDY.
I
F INTERESTED, CALL ME!
S
MOOCHES.

Honest to God, below my picture was my cell number.

Too far. Too far. Too fucking far.
I wasn’t breathing, and the hall was spinning around me. My hand shot out in front of me to grip the frame of my door as I took deep breaths in and out until I felt like I could stay standing again.

When I hadn’t been at work, or when I’d taken breaks to clear my head from the case, I’d been miserable thinking about how Maci and I still hadn’t talked. I hated thinking about her marrying that self-entitled douche, and yet, I still couldn’t make myself do anything about it, because I knew I should leave her alone. Cassidy had ruined me for half a year, and even she hadn’t consumed me like Maci was.

I don’t know why everything suddenly changed between us, and I don’t know why I’d never noticed her. It’d been a week since she’d brought me out of the Cassidy-haze. And it didn’t matter that it’d only been a week, or that half that time had been us pissed at each other. Those seven days had somehow felt like years of torture as I kept myself from her. But then she goes and pulls this shit? I flipped through my keys until I found hers and stormed into her apartment, already yelling before I even found her back in her bedroom.

“You’re messing with my career! Maci, don’t you get that? I’m a detective, people on the streets know me, there are a lot of law enforcement who will see that picture and know it’s me!”

She sat up and a soft smile crossed her face briefly before she could hide it and give me a puzzled look. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I don’t have time for your bullshit!” I slapped the flyer down on her bed near her feet and alternated pointing between it and her. “Where did you put all of these? You need to go take them down! You really think this is funny?”

That coy smile was back and she crossed her arms under her chest as she shrugged. “Actually, yeah, I did kind of think it was funny.”

“You went too goddamn far today! I’m done dealing with your shit.”

“Really . . . you’re done? Then why do you keep playing this game with me, huh?”

I grabbed at the flyer and threw it toward her. “This isn’t a game, this is my life!”

She threw her hands up before folding them under her chest again. “What the hell is with you tonight? The whole thing is a joke, I didn’t actually make a bunch of flyers! I just made the one; the two guys who called you are my friends. It was all just a joke! They’re the ones that helped me make it and put it on your door. You need to calm down, do you really think I would do something like that to you?”

My chest moved up and down rapidly as I took quick, hard breaths through my nose. “Yeah, I do! Why the hell wouldn’t you do that? You’ve been a fucking pain in my ass for the last week . . . for most my life.” I closed my eyes, cracked my neck and shook my head before turning to leave. “All of this, we’re done. Both of us,” I called over my shoulder.

“So when a prank sucks for you, we’re done. But you can do them with no consequences?” she asked, and I heard her feet hit the hardwood floor behind me. “You flooded my fucking apartment yesterday!”

“I’m just done, Maci. Done with this, done with you.” The more we did this . . . the more I interacted with her . . . the more I would want her. She was marrying someone else. I couldn’t keep doing this.

“I’ve known you most of my life, we’re neighbors . . . you’re just going to act like I don’t exist now?”

Scrubbing my hands over my face after I unlocked my door, I pushed it opened and started taking all my gear off my belt and slamming it down on the kitchen table. “I don’t know, maybe. Look, I got called in a day early on a case that is killing me, it’s been a long thirty-six hours, I’m fucking exhausted, just give me some time alone without dealing with one of your pranks. And swear to God if there’s something in my apartment, you better tell me now.”

“There’s nothing, and seriously, sue me. All I wanted was for you to come back to life. Like I told you, you were a zombie a week ago, is it wrong for me to want to change that? What even happened to you?”

“That’s really none of your business.”

“Why won’t you just talk to me? Tell me what happened half a year ago, and tell me about the case. This isn’t like you, maybe it’ll help to get it off your—”

Turning quickly, I put a hand to her chest and took two long steps until I had her pinned to the wall. “I said it’s none of your goddamn business! Stop pushing for something you have no right to know! If you want to talk so fucking bad, why don’t you tell me why the hell you’re going to marry that douche even though I know you don’t want to. You don’t even want to be with him, Maci, I know he doesn’t do anything for you.”

Her chest rose and fell rapidly, and her eyes narrowed. “Who the hell are you to say that I don’t want him or that he doesn’t do anything for me? Why the fuck do you even care?”

“Because I’ve had to listen to you moaning his name! I’ve had to listen to you pretending that what he’s doing is working for you.”

“And it is!”

“Do you moan louder to piss me off? Does he know that show you’ve been putting on is more for me than him? I swear to Christ if I have to hear you say his name one more time, I am going to lose my ever-loving mind.”

“Why? I have to listen to your whor—”

“Because the name you’re moaning should be mine!”

Her gray eyes blinked rapidly and she licked her lips. “W-what?”

“I guarantee you, if it were me inside you . . . the noises you’d be making wouldn’t be faked or forced . . . fuck, Maci, you wouldn’t be able to stop them from happening even if you tried.”

I closed the distance between us and brought my mouth down onto hers. A high-pitched moan sounded from her chest, and her arms came up around my shoulders, bringing me closer. Cupping her face in my hands, I traced her bottom lip with my tongue and bit down when they parted on a gasp.

“Don’t marry him, Maci,” I whispered into her mouth.

“I’m not.”

Pulling back, I looked at her and watched as her eyes fluttered open. “You’re not?”

“Of course not.”

I searched her eyes and breathed a “Thank God” before claiming her mouth again.

Maci’s hands slid down my chest and stomach, resting on my belt for just a second before she grabbed at my shirt and began pulling it out of my pants. Her fingers quickly worked through each button as I pulled off my tie just before she was pushing the shirt off my shoulders and down my arms. I grabbed the back of the undershirt I was wearing, and pulled it over my head, letting it fall to the floor

I groaned, and the muscles in my stomach contracted when she lightly ran her nails down my torso.

“Maci, tell me to stop,” I pleaded with her as I grabbed the waistband of her pajama pants and started pushing them down.

How we’d gone from yelling at each other about pranks, pasts that needed to stay there, and current partners, to where we were now . . . I had no idea. But with the way her body was reacting to mine, I knew I wouldn’t stop. She had to be the one to stop this, or I was going to take what I’d been keeping myself from.

She responded by curling her hands over mine, and pushing her pants the rest of the way down before stepping out of them, and I stepped back to look at her body as she pulled off the thin shirt she’d been wearing. Fucking beautiful.

I captured her mouth with mine again as I ran my hands over her bare skin, and when they hit her thighs, I grabbed them and pulled her up to press her against the wall. A raspy giggle left her that quickly turned into a moan as I bent forward to pull one of her nipples into my mouth. Her hands went into my hair and pulled my head closer to her body. I didn’t know how I could move from where we were right now, but that moan had to be the most amazing sound I’d ever heard from her. And I wanted to hear it over and over again. Remembering the fake sounds I’d always heard her make, I knew I needed to make this about her, no matter how much I wanted to take her up against this wall. For once, Maci needed someone who took care of her; and a quick fuck against the wall wouldn’t do that, and wasn’t what I wanted for my first time with her.

Pushing away from the wall, I released her breast and stared into her gray eyes as I walked us into my bedroom. Laying her down on the center of my bed, I was hit with every fantasy I’d been having of her over the last week. Part of me couldn’t believe she was actually lying on my bed; hair splayed everywhere as her hooded eyes followed my every movement. The other part of me couldn’t believe I was about to be stupid enough to take what I wanted.

My hands went to my belt, and I kept my eyes trained on hers as I slowly unbuckled it and slid it through the loops before letting it fall to the carpet Popping the button on my pants, I crawled onto the bed and over her, and about died when her face lit up with a come-get-me smile. I kept my hands planted on either side of her head, and lowered myself until I could tease her lips, and pulled back each time she tried to deepen the kiss.

A soft growl left her, and her eyes leveled a glare at me before I pressed my mouth firmly to hers and prompted her to open with my tongue. Her growl turned to a needy groan, and her hands went back to my pants. I pressed into her hand when she palmed me where I was straining against the material, but the second her hand went to the zipper; I sat back and moved her hands away.

Quickly leaning forward to kiss her confused face, I kissed a trail down her jaw to her ear as I moved off her body and whispered, “Let me take care of you.”

Running the back of my hand down her flat stomach, I gently prodded her legs open as my lips explored her neck and collarbone. My fingers trailed over her, and she whimpered when I groaned. She was so wet, so ready, and I’d never been more turned on in my life. Slipping two fingers into her, I pressed my thumb against her clit and made teasing circles as she pressed harder against my hand.

“Oh God,” she breathed when I quickened the pace. “Connor, please.”

“Please what?” I asked against her throat, and placed an openmouthed kiss there.

Her breathing was getting ragged as she rocked her hips against my hand, and I knew she was close. “Please—just don’t stop. God, don’t.”

“Don’t do this?” I pulled my hand away from her, and slammed my mouth down onto hers just before she could voice her frustration. “Trust me, Maci, I’m not done with you yet,” I said against her lips and moved down the bed and in between her legs.

Her eyes widened, and she looked like she was about to stop me, but the second my tongue swiped against her, her hips thrust off the bed, and a loud moan left her. I laughed against her swollen lips and gave another slow lick before sucking on her clit and bringing my hand back up to tease her entrance. Maci whimpered before begging me to continue as her hands threaded into my hair to hold me where I was.

“Holy shi—oh my God!” she cried out as her body shattered around me, and I continued through her orgasm.

Once her body went limp on the bed, I pulled away and stood from the bed.

“Commando?” she asked, her tone somewhat teasing as I shed my pants and searched for a condom.

I turned to look at her and winked. “Does that bother you?”

“No, but I was wrong.”

I paused when I began crawling back on the bed. “Wrong?”

“I’ve wondered for a long time, I’d finally decided boxer briefs,” she said with a coy smile.

Laughing loudly, I grabbed her hips and pulled her closer to me; loving that her legs automatically wrapped around me. “So you’ve thought about this before, huh?”

She shrugged and feigned indifference. “A time or two.”

“Uh-huh, a time or two.” I bit down on her collarbone and pressed against her entrance. Maci rocked her hips against me, and I spoke against her flawless skin. “I don’t know if I can be easy with you right now, Maci. I’m trying to hold off until I feel like I have more control, but you’re driving me crazy.”

Cupping my neck, she brought my face to hers and pressed her thumbs under my jaw until I was looking into her eyes. “Then don’t be easy,” she said so softly, I almost didn’t hear her.

“Maci—”

She rocked against me again, and with a growl, I slammed into her. Her nails dug into my shoulders, and a whimper mixed with pain left her.

“Shit, are you okay?”

“Move, Connor, oh God, please move,” she urged, and rocked her hips.

I cautiously began moving inside her. Terrified of causing her any more pain, I focused on her movements, and smiled when she glowered at me.

“If this is you not being in control,” she said breathlessly, “I’m worried what you’re like when you’re in control.”

Leaning back, I pulled almost all the way out before slamming back in over and over again. Using one hand to raise myself off her, I watched as her eyes rolled to the back of her head and she urged me to go harder as I continued pounding into her.

“Oh God, I’m—” she cut off when I shifted up onto my knees so I could quicken the pace.

Grabbing her legs, I brought them around my waist and leaned back over her, resting one hand on the bed, and letting the other trail to her sensitive bud. The second I rolled my fingers around it, her back arched and my name tore through her throat as she began shuddering around me, almost causing me to fall over the edge with her. Gritting my teeth, I rode her through her second orgasm and grabbed the hand that was trailing up my chest and slammed it down on the bed as I came harder than I ever have before.

Maci unlocked her legs from around my back, and I rocked onto the side that wasn’t holding her hand, bringing her with me. Her body was shaking subtly, but when I looked down at her face, there was nothing but the brightest smile there. Releasing her hand, I wrapped my arm around her body and held her close as we both calmed down. With a soft kiss to the corner of her mouth, I uncurled my body from hers and walked to the bathroom to dispose of the condom and wash up. When I walked back into my room, I stopped short, and the high I’d been riding ever since I’d kissed her in my living room suddenly left me.

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